But first I need to clean up. I gulp down a liter of water and take a quick but thorough shower before shaving and brushing my teeth. I still feel like hell but look at least a little more human. Hopefully, she’ll agree.
Although an apprehensive frown rather than the smile I’ve become accustomed to greets me when she opens the door. I force a grin while she studies my face. Probably searching for remnants of the idiot she had to deal with yesterday. “Good morning, trouble.”
“I think that’s what I should be calling you.”
Relief seems to wash through her with my teasing, and she releases her death grip on the knob. Waving me inside despite the concern still lining her forehead.
“Are you okay?”
“I’ll live.” She closes the door yet neither of us moves. Standing in the entryway unable to connect. Neither of us sure what to do about the awkwardness between us. “I’m sorry about last night. I appreciate you cleaning up. You didn’t have to do that.”
“I know. I just wanted to help. Although it doesn’t feel like enough.”
“It’s more than enough.” Fuck me for being weak. I messed up letting her in my apartment. In my head. Hell, in my whole damn life. “I guess you saw everything.”
Not sure how else to describe the wreckage from my mistakes, but she seems to know what I mean by her slight head bob.
“It breaks my heart…for all of you.” Her gaze bores into me. Ensuring I’m listening to her. That I’m hearing her message. “You shouldn’t blame yourself.”
My pulse races harder. Shame flooding my veins for the furious thoughts that bombard my mind when I think about what Madeline did. Reminding myself she only broke down because I wasn’t where I should have been. “No one else to blame but me.”
Evie must not agree the way she curls her lips in. Forcing herself not to say what she thinks. An argument she’ll never win. I know what I did and what I deserve. Nothing she can say will ever change that.
A soft ping breaks the silence, and she grabs her mobile off the counter. Typing out a quick response before she looks up. Her eyes meet mine again. Not quite as confident this time.
“Lauren, a girl from work, is coming over to borrow a dress for a wedding she’s going to next weekend. She’s been super sweet to me since I’m new and everything, so I wanted to return the favor.”
A perfectly normal and ordinary reason to have guests yet somehow I sense she’s lying. That she’s hiding something behind her casual demeanor. I act like it’s fine, that I’m fine, and nod. “I definitely don’t want to get in the middle of that.”
Her giggle is fake too. Nervous and forced. “I don’t blame you.”
“I guess I’ll go then.”
Easy for me to hightail it out of here with my lame excuse. I’ve done what I came here to do. I apologized and she accepted. No reason to linger since she wants me gone. I should be gone.
“We can still go to the game later if you want?”
Damn. It’s finally come to that. She offers to spend time with me out of pity. Obligation. Guilt. “Sure, love. Whatever you want.”
My lack of enthusiasm hurts her, and the phony smile disappears. I guess neither of us needs to pretend anymore. No friendly hugs or pecks on the cheek before I leave. Returning back to my place where I ignore the alarm for the stairwell and the chime for her door opening and the laughter floating down the hallway until nothing but silence. Glorious silence that I’m used to. That I thought I liked. That I’ve learned I hate now that I’ve met her.
I chug down more water.
I check the weather for the game later.
I write the check for my electric bill.
Fuck it.
I look at my laptop and a bomb only she can ignite detonates inside me.
Not just a girl. Two blokes, one of whom talks to Evie. She talks back. Glowing with a smile that I don’t recognize. An excitement I don’t like. An interest I don’t want her to have.
He’s her own age.
He’s clean cut and preppy.
He’s perfect for her.
He’s going to die.
I hurl the computer across the room. Shattering the laptop with his stupid face marring the screen. Black and gray plastic shards crunch under my shoes as I sprint from my apartment to hers. Ready to burst inside and drag his arse out.
I’ve lost it. I’ve really fucking lost it. But I don’t give a damn. Not anymore. Not when I realize I was so fucking wrong when I thought I had nothing left to lose.
The door’s already open and all four of them stare at me as they file out. The smiles sliding off their faces from my approach. From my threat. From my crazy. Fear, that I should never be the one to put on her stunning face, jerks Evie’s body and her sapphire eyes blow wide.
“What’s wrong? What’s going on?”
My gaze laser focuses on the idiot she was talking to. He widens his stance, his body stiffening from the tension in mine. As if he’s anticipating an attack. Preparing for a fight. Which I’m on the verge of doing if he doesn’t get the fuck out of here. “I need to talk to you. Alone.”
“Okay.”
Complete submission from my dominant tone that I should feel guilty about but don’t. I know it’s wrong to scare her, but I can’t stop myself.
“I’ll see you guys later.”
They murmur their good-byes, the girl thanking her for the long peach dress draped over her arm. Stupid motherfucker telling her he hopes everything is all right. Of course everything will be fucking perfect once he’s gone.
Only the clatter of their footsteps down the steps and the creak of the metal hinges sound in the quiet corridor. Once the heavy door clicks shut Evie’s on me.
“Is it Marta?”
“No, she’s fine.” I slide my hand on her back and guide her to my place. Knowing I can completely concentrate on her with all my safeguards in place. “Everyone’s fine. I swear.”
“Thank god.” The stress leaves her body under my fingers and she looks up at me. Frowning with the confusion I’ve generated. “Then what’s wrong?”
I lead her to the stool where I normally serve her dinner. She climbs up and slides her pert arse across the wood. Crossing her gorgeous legs out of habit. That tempt me more than ever knowing how close I came to having some other bastard touch them.
She takes in the mess on the floor behind me. Anxiety drawing down her face as she peruses the damage. “What happened?”
My palm cups her cheek to turn her back to face me. The only thing I give a damn about is settling things between us. Setting her straight about other men. Or the lack there of going forward. “I dropped it.”
“Andy?”
Now she knows I’m the one who’s lying. Silky hair brushing across my forearm as she tilts her head in worry and disbelief. Making the cords tighten from her concern over my stuff. Over my anger. Over me.
I place my fists on each side of the counter behind her. Locking her in place. Trapping her between my arms. Applying old interrogation methods she won’t be able to fight. “Who was that guy?”
She swallows and licks her lips. Responding to the demand pulsing in my tone.
“Josh. Lauren’s engaged to his older brother Logan.”
Tension surges between us from the proximity of our bodies. From her squirming in her seat. From her looking up at me with no way out from under my gaze. “Are you going to go out with him?”
Never fucking happening but I want to know what she intends. What she mistakenly believes I’m going to allow her to get away with.
“We just met.”
I don’t fall for her dismissive tone. As if the idea is preposterous. As if she’s never considered the possibility. As if I have nothing to be concerned about. “Are you going to go out with him?”
My voice is low, hard, almost unrecognizable even to myself with a possessiveness I’ve never heard. I’ve never experienced until now.
“Lauren is trying to fix us up. A double date. She thinks—
”
“What do you think?”
She shivers when I lean closer. My nose nudging her hair out of the way while my lips brush over her ear. A shuddering breath blows against my cheek and fireworks explode across my skin when her hand curls over my opposite shoulder. Steadying herself from me engulfing her.
“He’s n-nice. He’s easy to talk to.”
“Of course he is. He wants to fuck you.”
“That’s all you think I am?” My accusation enrages her, and she twists to the side, trying to face me again. Too small to be at eye level she stares up at me with all the bravado she can muster, leveling me with her disgust. Before I got sympathy and compassion. Now I get unadulterated fury. She’s pissed as hell at me. Almost as much as I am at her. “That’s all you think anyone would ever want from me?”
What she lacks in size she makes up for in rage. Shredding me to the core with the pain in her wracked body. The mafia princess in her full glory as she rolls back her shoulders and gives me a hard shove. “Get the fuck off me!”
Fuck that. My hands encircle her wrists, and I diminish my force to ensure I don’t crush the fine bones under my fingers. “I’m not finished talking to you.”
“Well I’m finished with you. I’m tired of being humiliated. Now let me go!”
The agony in her voice slices through me, and I still. Shocked by her allegation. I’m hung over and my damn head’s spinning from booze and lust, but I know I can’t be hearing her right. “I may have fucked up more times than I can count, but I know I’ve never humiliated you.”
Straining against my grip, she keeps fighting for me to release her. Which will never happen. “That’s all you ever do.”
“Trouble, you’re going to have to explain it to me because I’m totally confused.”
Misery surges in me with the loss of her gaze. Unwilling to look at me. Her shoulders drooping as much as her fire fades. “When I held your hand you couldn’t get me off of you fast enough. And when I kissed you, you rolled away. It’s embarrassing that you don’t want me.”
No one has ever been more wrong than her in this moment. “Look down.” She draws in a shaky breath from the huskiness of my voice. From the need in my eyes and my touch and my body. “Look down at my cock and see how much I want you.”
Her forehead brushes my chin, and I breathe deep, relishing the enticing scent of her flowery shampoo with the top of her head near my lips as we stare at my dick bulging in my pants of its own volition. “I’ve wanted you since the first moment I saw you.”
“Then why do you keep rejecting me?”
“Because I’m an idiot.”
Once again I fuck up and have no choice but to let her go. Instantly, her arms cross over her chest in protection of her wounded heart. She still refuses to look at me. I force her to, sliding my fingers under her chin and lifting her exquisite face to mine. “If things were different I’d make you mine.”
“I want to be yours.”
Fuck. She is killing me. “You know that can’t happen.”
“I don’t care that you’re older than me.” Her dainty fingers curl around my wrists this time. Holding me in place with her touch and her emotion and her veracity. “I really don’t.”
“I know, but I care. You need to be with a guy your own age.”
“I was with a guy my own age and you tricked me into making him leave.”
I should apologize but I don’t. I won’t. I’m not sorry, and I never will be.
“But I guess since we can’t be together and you want me to be with someone like Josh, then I’m going to give him a call. Maybe we can still meet for drinks tonight and I’ll find out if all he wants from me is to fuck me.”
She twists around and jumps off the seat, striding across the room. Gorgeous long hair whipping over her shoulder with the speed to get out of here. To get away from me. To get to him.
I should let her go. But I can’t. Not when I think about that bastard having what’s mine.
I catch her as her hand clutches the knob and pin her against the door. Trapping her between my body and the wood. One hand slides around her delicate throat while the other lifts up the hem of her dress. Skimming my fingertips from her thigh to her arse and sliding around to her belly that quivers under my touch. “Are you trying to make me jealous?”
“Is it working?”
Fucking sexy as hell with her baiting me. Her breath hitches when I drop lower. Brushing the satin edge of her knickers with my thumb and cupping her hip bone to push her back into my erection. “What do you think?”
“I think I’ve made you mine.”
Beyond magnificent with her certainty as well as her accuracy of owning me. “Trouble, I’ve been yours since I saw you through the window.” A gentle squeeze to her neck makes her gasp and shove backward against my thighs. “Are you wet for me?”
“Why don’t you see for yourself?”
Damn if I do and damn if she is. Dampness slides the silk under my fingers when I stroke between her trembling legs. Over and over as she starts to ride my hand. Seeking more from me despite the barrier between us. Which I’m more than willing to eliminate for her. I shove the fabric to the side and part her lips, slowly dragging the moisture up to her clit.
Her cry of pure pleasure shoots directly to my balls when I caress the throbbing petals, and my body jerks forward of its own accord, desperate with my raging need for her. My need to make her scream. My need to make her come.
Just like I imagined for so long, I finally fist her hair with my other hand and twist her face toward mine. Claiming her sweet lips that eagerly part for me. Rewarded with her mewls of ecstasy while my tongue sweeps into her mouth and my fingers plunge into her pussy.
Even better, she wants me. Awkwardly reaching backward to find me. Grasping at my jeans and then my shirt as she teeters on the edge. I should turn her around and fuck her properly, but I can’t stop, let alone think straight, when her massive orgasm drenches my fingers.
Spent, she falls away from my kiss and slumps against me. I catch her, holding her up with my arm wrapped around her breasts and my forehead dropped against the cool, smooth door. But I can’t bring myself to quit pleasuring her. I’ve waited far too long and demand everything she has. Everything she can give. Everything I can take. “I’ve got you Evie.”
“I know.”
The confirmation spurns me on, and I glide another finger inside of her. Tighter than I expected. She gasps, and her hands wrap around my forearm, holding on like she’s never letting me go with her fingernails digging into my skin. “You okay?”
Vibration that’s not from me finger fucking her shakes her leg as the chords of an urgent ring tone pierce the air from inside her pocket. I’m too selfish to care that someone else wants her too. I’m too damn desperate to have her all to myself right now. I’m never sharing her with anyone else in any sense of the word. “Ignore it.”
“I can’t.” She pants through the words. “It’s my father.”
We can disregard everything and everyone—except for him. Of all the damn people to call. I guess he still doesn’t trust me yet after my earlier failure. Checking on her, or more accurately, me, to make sure everything really is okay.
I back up quickly from her whisper but hold her steady. Ensuring she’s stable as she slides out her mobile and presses the screen to her ear.
“Hi Dad.”
She sounds normal, maybe slightly breathless. But she looks a gorgeous fucking mess. With wild strands plastered to her face and wrinkles spoiling her crisp black and white dress and the pink flush shining on her cheeks lifted in a conspiratorial smile. Beautiful for me. Because of me. Beckoning to me.
Which I can’t touch her for any reason or under any circumstances. Not with her talking to Nick. The man who’s paying me to protect her not fuck her. The man who loves her as much as I do. The man who’s going to end up murdering me before this is over.
Death for loving her would be so damn worth it though.
“He did? Really?”
She turns to the side, but I still catch the hint of a smile in her radiant profile. Her head bobbing from whatever he tells her while she paces in the entry way. Walking back and forth across the hardwood as she listens.
“I will. I promise.”
I rub my thumb over the tips of my fingers. Sticky from her release and eager for more. My cock is still rock-hard thinking about the come smeared on her pussy and thighs. Throbbing with the thought of mine mingling with hers very soon.
“I love you too, but you know I’m too old for you to call me that anymore.”
She acts miffed although I know her too well. Not sure what nickname he uses with her, but I can tell she actually likes it. Basking in her Dad’s affection. Which pleases me too. Every girl should have a good relationship with her father. Even one as deadly as Nick.
“Okay, bye.”
Sliding her mobile on the counter, she blows out a deep breath. As if calming herself. But the exercise doesn’t work if the fire flaming in her gaze is any indication when she looks at me.
“Sorry.”
I shake my head and hold out my hand. “No apologies Evie. You love your family and should talk to them whenever you can.”
Which she knows I would do in a heartbeat if I had the chance and believes I’m sincere in my words. And in my request for her to get her sweet arse over to me when I gesture for her to come closer. I don’t know if she even realizes the defiant eyebrow arch she gives me, but her body doesn’t lie about what it wants. Shuddering in response to my command, she strides directly to me. Right between my spread legs where she belongs.
My thighs automatically tighten against her hips and my hands glide to her face, cupping her cheeks for a second before they sweep over her shoulders and down her arms. Welcoming her back to me and pushing thoughts of anyone else out of her head. “Do you know how beautiful you are when you come?”
Another Round Page 8
