Even through the glass, Alec could see that she was crying. She said something to Tommy and then she shook her head, covering her face with her hands. She started to turn away, but Tommy leapt to his feet and reached out to stop her. Rebecca caved in an instant, burying her face in his chest.
No.
Alec watched in horror as Tommy cradled her in his arms and pressed his lips to her forehead. Then he smoothed his hand along her cheek and tilted her face towards his. Alec waited for her to push him away and tell him that they couldn’t do this…but she didn’t. His entire world came screeching to a halt when Rebecca slid her arms around Tommy’s neck and willingly returned his kiss.
No.
Alec stood frozen in place, unable to move if he tried. He didn’t want to see any more, but he couldn’t tear his gaze away. Hot tears burned in his eyes as he watched Tommy back her against the wall and peel her shirt over her head, revealing the feminine contours of her body. Then Rebecca tilted her head back and buried her fingers in his hair as his mouth moved from her lips to her neck to the ivory skin above her breasts.
No.
Alec had seen enough. In less than a second, his shock morphed into violent, uncontrollable rage. He shouted and slammed his fists against the window, fully expecting them to jump apart.
They didn’t. Tommy’s hands were behind her back now, unfastening the clasp of her bra. Alec screamed and banged his fists on the window again and again, wondering why they didn’t hear him.
He was only ten feet away. How could they not hear him?
With a start, Alec sat bolt upright, slamming his head against the steering wheel. His heart was pounding and his body was trembling, but Tommy and Rebecca were nowhere to be seen. He gulped in a ragged breath and stared wide-eyed at the cab of his truck, gradually realizing where he was. He wasn’t outside Tommy’s cabin. He wasn’t anywhere near the ranch.
Alec had experienced a lot of nightmares in his life…but never one like this.
A quiet knock sounded on the window behind him, sending another jolt through his nervous system. He spun around to face the driver’s side window, where a kindly looking police officer stood waiting. Alec’s hands were still shaking as he rolled down the window.
“You okay, son?” the officer asked.
“Yes, sir.”
“You been drinking at all?”
“No, sir.” He sucked in a silent breath and willed himself to calm down. “Just taking a break from a long drive.”
“Well, I can’t have you parked on the side of the highway like this,” the officer said, gesturing to the road before them. “There’s a rest area about ten miles from here if you need to get some shut-eye.”
Alec nodded and reached for his keys. “Thank you, sir. I’ll do that.”
He started the engine and merged onto the highway, finally feeling his heart rate return to normal. Not a chance he was going back to sleep, not after a nightmare like that. He didn’t know exactly where he was–he wasn’t even sure which state he was in–but at this point he didn’t care.
When he climbed into his truck yesterday, he had four directions to choose from–north, south, east, or west. He didn’t consciously make a decision; he simply left the ranch and started driving. At some point during the night he’d pulled over to rest his eyes…only to experience the most horrifying dream of his life.
Was it only a dream, he wondered? Or had his subconscious somehow revealed what was happening back home?
Either way, there was nothing he could do about it now. Alec bypassed the rest area and kept driving, watching the sun rise in his rearview mirror. He drove and drove and drove, for hours and hours and hours, trying to convince himself that if he drove far enough he could actually outrun the truth.
In his mind, the road before him went on forever, so he was startled when it came to an abrupt end.
At the Pacific Ocean.
He parked his truck and stepped onto the cliff, gazing at the waves as they crashed against the rocks below. He’d never seen the ocean before. He’d caught a glimpse of the Atlantic when he flew to Boston several years back, but that wasn’t the same as standing on the shoreline and feeling the harsh, salty sea breeze on his face.
It was so loud, too. He hadn’t expected that. The sea practically roared as it approached the rocks, sending massive bursts of white foam into the air.
He drove a little farther down the coast and stopped at a phone booth, scanning the directory until he found the address he was seeking. After obtaining directions from the clerk at the service station, he climbed back into his truck and began the drive up a long, winding road.
“You’ll think you’ve passed it, but you haven’t,” the clerk told him. “It’s set way, way back there.”
Alec was glad for the warning, because he would’ve turned around miles ago without it. Sure enough, long after the pavement turned to dirt, a rustic log cabin appeared through the trees. He pulled into the driveway and parked behind the muddy Jeep, pausing for a minute before he killed the engine.
He stepped onto the porch and knocked, expecting nothing but silence. Seconds later, though, he heard the sound of approaching footsteps, and when the door swung open he wasn’t sure which of them was more surprised.
“Alec?” Shania gasped.
Chapter 27
In spite of himself, Alec managed to smile. “Hi.”
Shania gave a little laugh and threw her arms around his neck. “What a wonderful surprise,” she said, pulling back and glancing at his truck. “Where’s Rebecca?”
Alec shook his head. “It’s just me.”
“Oh.” The smile dropped off her lips. “Is everything alright?”
“Not really.”
Shania didn’t respond right away. He could almost see the walls shooting up around her as her gaze flitted between him and his truck.
“Well, come in,” she said, opening the door wider.
Her cabin was even more rustic on the inside, if that was possible. A wood-burning stove sat in the far corner, emitting a bright orange glow into the living room. There was a kitchen off to his right and a worn leather couch to his left, but that wasn’t what he was looking at.
Without even removing his boots, he strode across the living room to the sliding glass doors. The access road was hemmed in by evergreens, so he hadn’t realized how close he was to the ocean. Now he could see that the back porch sat directly on the edge of a seaside cliff.
“This is your view?” he asked.
Shania stepped up beside him. “The cabin’s not much to brag about, but the sunsets are hard to beat.”
Alec studied the waves rolling in towards the shore, admiring their steady, consistent patterns. Why couldn’t his own life make that kind of sense?
“You look like hell,” Shania added.
At that, he gave a wry grin. “It’s good to see you, too.”
She mirrored his grin. “I was about to make some tea. Would you like a cup?”
He would have preferred a glass of whiskey–a bottle, even–but he needed to keep his mind sound. He nodded without diverting his gaze and she headed into the kitchen, casting brief glances in his direction while she prepared their drinks. He knew he owed her an explanation for his sudden appearance–without his wife–but he didn’t have the slightest clue where to start.
“Here.”
Alec turned to find her holding out a steaming mug. “Thanks.”
Shania crossed the living room and settled on the couch, tucking her legs beneath her. He followed a moment later and sat at the opposite end, taking a slow, thoughtful sip of tea before he met her gaze.
“I figured out what you meant about Tommy.”
She cringed. “Oh, Alec. What happened?”
“I’m not exactly sure,” he admitted, glancing into his mug. “How did you know?”
“That he’s in love with Rebecca?”
She said it gently, but it was still shocking to hear the words aloud. “Yeah.”
“It’s p
retty obvious. I saw it in the first five minutes I spent with him.”
“I couldn’t see it.” He shrugged and looked up at her. “Or maybe I chose not to.”
Shania’s expression was pained. He could tell that she wanted to ask him more, but to his relief, she remained silent. He drained the rest of his tea and leaned his head against the cushion, watching the sun sink below the horizon.
The next thing he knew, it was dusk and Shania was spreading a soft blanket across his lap. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
She nodded in understanding. “Get some rest. It looks like you need it.”
His eyelids felt like deadweight as he watched her gather their mugs and carry them to the sink. Then she switched off the lights and turned for the bedroom, pausing in the doorway to glance back at him.
“Alec?”
“Yeah?”
There was just enough daylight remaining for him to discern her troubled expression. “Can I be honest with you?”
Under different circumstances, he would have smiled. “Are you ever not?”
She folded her arms across her chest. “It took me a long time to get over what happened between us,” she said quietly. “And I like Rebecca.”
Alec cringed. “Shania, that’s not–”
“Please just let me say it.” She paused and drew in a deep breath. “You and I have always been there for each other, so if you’re here because you need a friend, that’s fine. But if you came here for something else…I mean, if this is supposed to be some sort of revenge…I don’t want any part in it.”
As always, he could count on her candor. He realized then that it was the whole reason he was here. Right now he needed someone to give it to him straight, and Shania wasn’t afraid to do it.
“I just need a friend,” he assured her.
She didn’t bother to mask her relief. “Alright,” she said, sending him a halfhearted smile. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
*
Alec couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept past dawn, but sunlight was already pouring through the windows when he struggled to alertness. He didn’t even know where he was until he heard the roar of the ocean and the high-pitched screech of a seagull.
“No, everything’s fine,” came a quiet voice from the bedroom. “I had an old friend show up yesterday who’s going through some stuff right now…yeah…yeah, I’ll check tickets again in a couple of days…”
Alec rose from the couch and walked to the sliding door, stepping outside to give Shania her privacy. His cell phone buzzed inside his jacket, indicating that the battery was running low. He pulled the phone from his pocket and was about to switch it off when he saw a text message from Rebecca:
I’m worried about you. Are you alright?
He cringed when he realized that she’d sent it yesterday morning, wishing he’d seen it sooner. He stared blankly at the screen before he typed the only answer he could think of:
No. But I want to be.
Right after the message sent, his phone died. So much for that, he thought as he replaced it in his pocket.
He stepped up to the railing and breathed in the salt air, trying to prepare himself for whatever the following days would bring. He wouldn’t be in Oregon long, he knew that much. He’d already been away from the ranch for two nights, and just the thought of what might be happening in his absence made his stomach churn.
At the same time, though, he knew he needed the physical distance if he had any hope of seeing his way clear.
The sliding door opened behind him, and he turned to see Shania step onto the porch in pajama pants and a faded sweatshirt. “Sorry about that,” she said. “I was trying to be quiet.”
“Don’t apologize. I’m the one who showed up and wrecked your plans.”
“They’re not wrecked. Just put on hold.”
Alec gave an appreciative smile. “Do you have to work today?”
“No. I just got back from a long stint, so I’ve got some time off. I spent most of the winter in Brazil again.”
He raised a brow. “With the anthropologist?”
Shania gave a coy nod. “But he’s back in Cambridge now. I’m hoping to get over there to see him before my next assignment.”
All of a sudden, her guarded reaction to his arrival made perfect sense. In fact, everything about Shania’s demeanor was different than it was last summer–from her smile to the way she carried herself to the way she was looking at him.
“I’m happy for you.”
“Thanks,” she replied. “I’m not sure where it’s going to go yet. I mean, we’re both on the road so much for work…but we’re giving it a shot.”
“That’s all any of us can do,” he said, turning his eyes back to the water.
She stepped up beside him and leaned her elbows against the railing. “So do you want to tell me what happened?”
“I will,” he promised. “But can it wait a little while? Can we…I don’t know, maybe go do something today?”
Shania nodded. “There’s a great breakfast spot nearby.”
They climbed into her Jeep and she made the long trek down the dirt road, winding through the evergreens until they entered the town of Tillamook. Spring arrived earlier in Oregon than it did in Wyoming; already bright bursts of pink and yellow flowers were popping up along the roadway. The town was a quaint maze of shops and restaurants and marinas, with long gray docks stretching out into the lapping waves of the bay.
Shania parked her Jeep and Alec followed her into a waterside café called Pirate’s Loft. A bearded man who arguably could have been a pirate himself glanced up from the host stand when they stepped into the foyer.
“Well, look who’s back in town,” he greeted, flashing Shania a broad smile. “How was your trip?”
“Long and in desperate need of a better menu,” she replied. “Mitch, this is my friend Alec.”
“Good to meet you,” Mitch said, giving Alec’s hand a solid shake. “Come on back. I’ve got a nice table for you kids.”
Alec couldn’t remember the last time anyone had called him a kid, but he wasn’t about to complain. He followed a step behind them, taking his time to admire the nautical décor. Pictures of lighthouses and old fishing boats adorned the walls while harpoons, crabs, and sharks dangled in fishnets above his head.
“Coffee for you both?” Mitch offered once they reached the table.
“Please,” Shania said, hanging her jacket on the back of her chair.
Alec took a seat opposite her as Mitch bounded towards the kitchen. “Nice guy.”
“Yeah, he’s owned this place for as long as I’ve lived here.”
He turned his gaze to the window, watching a flock of seagulls glide above the water. An old wooden troller drifted past the pier, leaving the bay in its wake as it journeyed towards the open ocean.
Alec watched it shrink in the distance before he finally reached for his menu. “So what’s good here?”
Over a leisurely breakfast, Shania told him about her trip to Brazil, the research her team done on giant anteaters, and her budding relationship with the anthropologist. To his relief, she didn’t say one word about Wyoming or Rebecca or Tommy.
Once the server cleared their plates, Alec glanced back at the water. “Is there an actual beach around here? One we can walk on?”
Shania grinned. “Of course there is.”
Fifteen minutes later she pulled her Jeep up to a wide, sandy stretch of beach. Alec pulled off his boots and left them in the car, rolling up the bottoms of his jeans before he stepped onto the sand. He strode all the way out to where the water met the land, letting the waves lap around his ankles. The water was freezing, but he didn’t care.
He’d always wondered what it would be like to feel sand between his toes.
Shania stepped up beside him, hugging her arms to her chest. “What do you think?”
“I love it,” he said, smiling when he noticed a pod of dolphins crest
ing in the surf. “I think people like the ocean for the same reason they like the mountains. When you stand next to it, it makes you feel small. Or maybe it just makes your problems seem small.”
When she didn’t respond, he spoke again. “Do you ever hear from your father?”
She glanced at him sideways, visibly surprised by the change of topic. “I get a Christmas card from him every year. But that’s about it.”
Alec leaned over to scoop up a seashell. “I’ve been thinking a lot about our parents these past few days,” he admitted, studying the swirl of colors on the shell. “Especially that last summer, when everything came out.”
Shania gave a little nod, encouraging him to continue. He sighed and tossed the shell into the waves, letting his gaze linger on the horizon.
“I was so angry at my mother for what she did to us,” he said, sliding his hands into his pockets. “Because it wasn’t just my father that she hurt. She didn’t just wreck my family. She tore yours apart, too. And I remember a few years later when my father said that he’d finally forgiven her. I didn’t understand. In my mind, there could never be forgiveness. There could never be a reason or an excuse for what they did.”
She placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You still haven’t told me what happened.”
Over the next half hour, Alec tried to do just that. He explained how suffocated he felt in the farmhouse and how much he’d been isolating himself from everyone. He explained why he put the ranch on the market and Rebecca’s reaction to his decision. He explained the work he’d been doing with horses and the trip to Las Vegas and his fight with Tommy–anything and everything that would help him determine how he’d gotten into this mess.
Shania frowned when he finished speaking. “Isn’t Tommy getting married soon?”
“In a couple of weeks.”
“And I’m assuming Liz doesn’t know any of this?”
He gave a helpless shrug. “I live there and I didn’t know.”
“But you don’t actually know if anything’s going on between them, right?”
Alec shook his head. “The way Tommy said it, though, and the fact that he didn’t fight back…it was like he’d already won.”
Showdown Page 18
