“Take care of her, Marian. Call the sanitarium later today. They’ll give you an update.”
“Dat, if you call my Englisch friend, she will get the message to me.” She bit her bottom lip, waiting for his reaction.
He blinked as if not comprehending her words.
“Amy,” she said. “Amy, my friend. She has a cell phone, and she knows where I live. She will get a message to me if you need to contact me sooner.”
“An Englischer? Nee. We don’t share our business with them.” He pushed through the door and then turned back. “I’m stopping at the bishop’s on the way out of town, so he’ll know.”
Marian nodded. “Gott go with you,” she said as he turned his back to hurry into the waiting van.
After it drove off, she went inside and put all the food preparations away. She had no appetite. She made a sandwich and gave it to Izzie. Then she carried the baby back outside, sat in the rocker on the porch, and stared down the empty drive. Mamm had run off? She shivered. Was she all right? In her crazed mind, was she all right? Would she remember where she lived?
Marian clenched her teeth. How absurd. Of course, Mamm knew where she lived. She wasn’t insane. She was just a bit confused. That was all.
Severe anxiety and depression. That didn’t mean she would forget her own address.
Izzie wiggled to get free. Marian realized she was gripping the baby as if to never let go.
“Sorry, Izzie.” She put the baby down on the porch.
Now, what was she to do? Sit around and do nothing, hoping her mother would appear at the beginning of the drive?
Thomas had helped her last time. He had helped her the night Mamm had run through the woods like a wild woman. Maybe he could help her now. She missed his quiet strength. She missed his calm, solid presence in a crisis.
But they weren’t together any more.
That didn’t mean they weren’t friends, did it?
She wished Amy lived close. Dat wouldn’t take her phone number, which was crazy because Amy would have rushed over with any information. She was like that. Caring. Being Englisch had nothing to do with it.
Tears burned Marian’s eyes. She didn’t want to sit there alone with the baby and wait. She should tell her aenti. But Dat hadn’t told her to. Still, Barb was Mamm’s sister. Maybe she’d know what to do.
She would walk over to Aenti Barb’s house and tell her. Surely, that would be okay. She ran inside for her shoes. When she returned, Izzie reached up her arms, seeming to sense that they were going to leave for a while.
Marian picked her up and situated her on her hip. They always left the house unlocked, so if Mamm was on her way, she could enter as she pleased. But Marian couldn’t fathom her arriving so soon.
She walked quickly down the drive and out to the road. She walked on the left shoulder, leaving a wide berth for cars or buggies. She knew from experience that cars often sped along the back roads, seemingly oblivious to all the horses and wagons in the area.
She paced herself. Izzie was getting mighty heavy for such walks, but she still tottered too much to walk on her own. Marian saw a black car approaching and scooted closer to the edge of the road. It slowed, and she was grateful for the consideration, but when it came to a near stop in front of her, she worried. What was the problem?
She kept her eyes downcast, until it indeed did stop. She looked up and gasped when she saw the driver.
Four
Roger? Roger Young?
Marian’s mouth dropped open, and she stared wide-eyed as he got out from the car.
“It’s you!” he cried. “It’s really you!”
She didn’t move, frozen to the spot.
In two strides, he was beside her, his green eyes searching hers. “Do you have any idea how many times I’ve driven this road hoping? Just hoping to catch a glimpse of you?”
She blinked. “You have?”
She was stunned. When they’d decided there was no future to their relationship, they’d broken if off. True, it had left her bereft and missing him, but she’d come to peace with it. She’d gone on with her life and eventually fallen in love with Thomas. Roger was no more to her than a pleasant memory.
Yet there he stood before her, and the memories swirled back through her. She smiled up at him.
“I simply can’t believe it,” he said. “It worked!”
She chuckled and shifted Izzie to her other hip.
“So, this is your little sister.”
She nodded. “Jah. This is Izzie. Izzie, say hello to Roger.”
Izzie buried herself into Marian’s shoulder.
“Oh, she’s a shy one. Not unlike her big sister.” Roger beamed at Marian. “How are you?”
Marian remembered why she was there, out on the road, but she kept the smile on her face. No need to unburden herself to Roger. “I’m fine. Just going to visit my aenti.”
He raised his chin in acknowledgement. “She lives close?”
Marian indicated with a nod of her head. “A bit further down the way.”
“I don’t suppose you’d let me give you a ride to her house?”
She shook her head. “Nee. It’s not far.”
His eyes narrowed. “Are you sure you’re all right?”
She stepped back. Was her face so obvious?
“What’s wrong?” He touched her wrist, and she felt the familiar zap go through her.
He dropped his hand. “Tell me.”
“It’s nothing,” she began. “Really. It’s nothing.”
He didn’t speak, and his eyes grew more intense on hers.
She swallowed. “Okay, fine. My mother is missing.”
His eyebrows shot up. “Missing? What do you mean?”
“She was in a place, a kind of hospital. And she’s missing now.”
“What?”
“Please don’t ask me to explain it all. Dat would have my hide.”
His face turned serious. “How can I help?”
She looked up and down the road. If she was in his car, they could look for her mother and cover more territory much more quickly. She moved closer to his car.
“I just realized I don’t have a car seat,” Roger told her.
She frowned. “What?”
“I don’t have a car seat.” He pointed to Izzie. “For the baby. We’d get stopped by the police.”
She shook her head. “It’s a bad idea, anyway.”
“Could you leave her with your aunt? Would it do any good to search the roads around here?”
Her throat tightened. “I don’t know.” The words came hard as the lump in her throat grew. “I don’t know anything anymore.”
He stepped to her and put his arm around her shoulder. She went stiff, and he dropped his arm. “I’m sorry,” he muttered.
“It’s all right,” she said, although it wasn’t. She again glanced up and down the road. “If anyone saw you. Saw us.” She shook her head. “It wouldn’t be good. Besides, it wouldn’t be right.”
“I know.” He stepped back. “My looking for you in the first place so many times is ridiculous. Pretty pathetic when you think about it.”
She tipped her head and looked at him.
He shrugged. “I missed you is all. I missed what might have been.”
“But could never be.” She ended his thought for him.
He sighed. “But could never be.”
“I need to go,” Marian said. “I need to talk to my aenti.”
“Okay.” The wistful look in his eyes cut to her very soul.
She straightened her posture and pulled Izzie’s hands from where the little girl was pulling on her kapp. “I missed you, too,” she said softly.
He looked down at the ground and kicked at a loose rock, shooting it into the ditch. “At least I got to see you. That’s something.”
She nodded. “Jah, that’s something.” She reached out and touched his elbow. “We’re still friends.”
“That’s something, too,” he muttered and lo
oked at her. “I hope you find your mother soon. And I hope everything works out all right.”
“Thank you. And it will. Gott is in control.”
“Do you want me to drive around and look for her?” He paused and sighed. “Which I guess would be silly since I don’t even know what she looks like.”
Marian’s eyes misted over. “Nee. But thank you. Truthfully, I don’t even know if she’s around here. We don’t know where she is.”
He took her hand, squeezed it, and let it go. “Maybe you could tell Amy when you find your mother, and Amy could tell me.”
Marian nodded. “I can do that.”
“Good-bye, Marian.”
“Good-bye, Roger.”
He walked back to his car, where he had left it in the middle of the road. He paused and said, “You know, our friendship has been nothing but good-bye’s.” He gave her a wry smile and got into his car and drove away.
She grasped Izzie tighter and hurried down the road.
In another world, she and Roger could have been something. But she wasn’t in another world, she was in this one, and she’d already struggled to find a place of peace with that truth. She blinked back the tears in her eyes and forced herself to face what was really tearing at her heart—besides her mother’s disappearance.
It was Thomas. She missed him.
She missed him like she would miss her own heartbeat. She missed his gentle manner, his calm spirit, his kind ways. She missed the way his forehead crinkled when he was worried. She missed the way he gave her a half-smile when he was amused. She missed the way his eyes gleamed when he watched her. She missed his strength, his wisdom. He would know what to do.
Had she given up on him too quickly? Had she cut ties that hadn’t needed cutting?
She stopped at the end of her aenti’s drive. It wasn’t Barb she wanted to talk to at all. It was Thomas.
She turned around. She would go to the Groft’s. If she stood at the edge of their farm, she could probably catch a glimpse of him if she waited long enough. Or maybe she could get the attention of one of his sisters or brothers. They would fetch him for her.
With renewed energy, she strode back past her own farm and to the end of the road. Her arms ached with Izzie’s weight, but she kept going. After another twenty minutes, she saw Thomas’s house up ahead. She slowed, panting with the exertion. She set Izzie down on the road and grasped her hand. Bending to accommodate Izzie’s short legs, they continued the last few yards down the road with small steps.
When she reached the trees bordering Thomas’s farm, she stopped. She heard what sounded like his youngest sister calling the dog. She moved a bit to get a better view. There she was. It was young Deb.
Marian was ready to call out to her when the little girl glanced over and saw her, her eyes widening with recognition.
“Marian!” she cried. She dropped the bucket she was carrying and raced to the road. “Hi! Did you come to play?”
Marian smiled down at her. “Hi, Deb. No, I came to see Thomas.” She glanced around. “Is he about?”
“But you brought Izzie. Don’t you want to play?”
“Maybe later. Could you fetch your big brother for me?”
“Thomas?”
“Jah. Is he in the barn?”
Deb’s lips puckered out in a round circle. “Nee. I don’t think so.” She squinted up at the sky as if she were deep in thought. “I think he’s behind the barn with Dat.”
“Can you fetch him?”
“Can I take Izzie with me?” she asked, bending down to pull one of Izzie’s curls.
“I don’t think so. We’ll wait for you here, all right? No need to tell your dad. Just tell Thomas that someone needs him.” Marian suddenly felt foolish, standing there on the Groft’s property asking to see her former beau. What if Thomas didn’t want to see her?
She hadn’t thought this through at all.
Deb had already run off to do her bidding. Maybe Marian should sneak away before Thomas appeared. She didn’t think she could bear it if he didn’t welcome her. She took a step backwards and was ready to leave when she saw Thomas circle the barn. She knew he saw her by his expression of shock. He walked quickly across the yard, Deb at his heels.
“Marian!” he said. “What are you doing here?”
She looked into his face and saw the love in his eyes and nearly crumpled with relief. It was all right. He still cared for her.
“Thomas,” she choked out. “Thomas.”
He glanced quickly at his sister. “Deb, go see if Mamm needs some help, would you?”
“Why? I wanna visit Marian.”
“Deb, please. Go on.”
She gave her big brother a dirty look but obeyed and left them. Marian set Izzie down on the grass.
“Has something happened? Why are you here?”
“Mamm ran away from the sanitarium.”
His eyebrows shot up. “What? When?”
“Last night some time. Dat is on his way there in the van.”
“Are there people out looking for her?” He stepped closer and took her hand in his. At his touch, Marian’s breathing slowed, and she felt his strength flow into her.
“I think the sanitarium has people looking. Maybe the police. I don’t know what to do.” Her eyes were wide and tears threatened to spill down her cheeks.
“You’re doing exactly what you need to be doing,” he said and nodded at Izzie. “You’re taking care of your sister.”
“But what if Mamm’s hurt? What if she’s lost?”
Thomas shook his head. “I don’t think she is.” He pulled her further into the shade of the trees. “I know your mamm’s been confused. But I don’t think she is confused about where her home is.”
“You don’t think she’ll get mixed up?”
“I think she’s coming home.”
“I thought so, too. But how? She doesn’t have any money.”
“Marian.” His voice was soft. “Your mamm is one of the strongest women I know. She’s tough. You know she is. Look what she’s gone through.”
“Four lost babies,” Marian whispered, her heart heavy.
“Jah. Four lost babies. But she has you, and she has Izzie.” Thomas squeezed her hand. “She’s coming home. And you’ll be there to welcome her.”
Tears flowed down her cheeks. “But Thomas, she’s sick.”
“Maybe. But she’s coming home.”
“I don’t know how to help her.” Marian put her hand to her throat.
“You are helping her. You’ve been helping her all along.”
Marian shook her head, emotion twisting through her. “Nee. I haven’t. I haven’t!”
Thomas gathered her in his arms and held her. Gently, he rocked her back and forth, whispering her name over and over. A soft breath of relief slipped from Marian lips. She sank into his chest and let him hold her, let him comfort her. She was conscious only of his warmth, his love, his tender voice in her ear. She pressed herself against him, knowing only how right it felt to be close to him again. How right it felt to be in his arms.
It seemed that time stood still in that moment. Nothing but Thomas mattered. Nothing but reconnecting with him.
“Marian?” There was a question in his voice now.
She leaned back and looked up at him.
“I missed you.” He said it simply, matter-of-factly, as if nothing was more certain in the world.
She nodded, and the tears in her throat blocked her words.
“I don’t care how long it takes,” he whispered. “I’m never saying good-bye to you again. I’ll wait forever if I have to. I’ll lose my inheritance if I have to.”
She eyes spilled over. She gulped and squeezed his arm.
He gave a throaty chuckle, his eyes holding hers. “I take it you’re all right with that.”
Again, she nodded. “Jah,” she managed to get out. “Jah, jah.”
Izzie yanked on the hem of Marian’s dress. Marian looked down at her and laughed. “Ach
, Izzie! Are you wanting something?”
She bent and scooped her sister up again.
“I’ll hitch up the pony cart. I’m taking you home.”
“I can walk, Thomas.”
He looked at her. “I’m taking you home,” he repeated. He left her, striding purposefully toward the barn.
She leaned against a tree, and gave herself over to the budding hope that filled her. She’d been correct to go there. Thomas had helped set her right. She could go home now and wait. Mamm would show up. Somehow, her mother would find her way home.
Thomas made quick work of hitching up the cart. Within minutes, he drove around to her. She climbed in, grateful that she didn’t have to tote Izzie all the way home.
“Do you want me to wait with you?” he asked when he pulled into her drive.
“Nee. I don’t think you should. It wouldn’t be fitting. I’m the only one here.”
She saw the muscles in Thomas’s jaw clench. “I’ll wait if you want me to.”
“Nee. It’s okay.”
He pulled the cart right up to the porch and jumped down to come around and help her out. It was unnecessary, but touching nevertheless.
As she mounted the steps, another buggy pulled into the drive.
“The Bishop!” she cried.
Thomas waited by his horse. The buggy pulled up right next to Thomas’s cart.
“Marian,” Bishop Welter spoke through the window opening. “Any word from your dat?”
She shook her head. “I’m supposed to call later.”
He nodded his head. “I see. I’ve come to fetch you to our place. No need for you to be waiting all alone.”
“Thank you, Bishop, but I think I should stay here in case Mamm comes home.”
Bishop looked at Thomas. “What are you doing here, young Thomas?”
“I’ve just given her and Izzie a ride home.” He climbed back into his cart. “But I’ll be on my way.” He looked at Marian. “If you need anything, come over. Mamm and Dat will be glad to help. All of us will.”
She was uncomfortable speaking with Thomas in the Bishop’s presence. She gave Thomas a farewell look, trying to tell him with her eyes how much she loved him, how much she appreciated him being there for her.
Thomas nodded at her and gave a gentle slap to the reins. His cart started down the drive.
Amish Romance BOOK BUNDLE: Marian's Story: Amish Romance Boxed Set (Hollybrook Amish Romance) Page 10
