by Bowes, K T
His uncle’s house nestled into the mountain, a huge bite of earth taken from the slope to make the area flat. The house was forty years old, built in the year of Logan’s birth after the mysterious rift between the two brothers, Alfred and Reuben Du Rose. Logan’s uncle was a stranger, his and Logan’s paths never permitted to cross.
Logan watched his mother’s adultery with Reuben, his stomach thudding with a dull ache as realisation filtered through to his brain. Above the geriatric fornicators, he let out a long, painful breath and rubbed his hand through his hair as his mount shifted underneath him. Numbness overtook and he worked hard to kid himself he was mistaken, but as he spun his horse to leave, a rabbit shot out from the undergrowth making the young animal spook. Logan calmed him but faced the cedar wood house and the couple entwined on the driveway, ten metres below.
“Geez!” he exhaled. His heart knotted in his chest, shaking him with a mixture of conflicting emotions as his uncle’s grey irises locked onto his. For a long moment they stared at each other, identical grey eyes in the same olive faces, battling in silence. Then Reuben smiled, a wistful, longing expression which turned Logan’s heart inside out. He saw a naked craving in the other man’s eyes, too painful to acknowledge.
Miriam’s son wheeled his horse around and rode it at speed down the mountain. He arrived back at the work site to continue repairing the loose fence, his horse sweating and blowing. Logan was eerily silent, making his men uneasy and ruining their banter, glad when they could escape him and go back to the bunkhouse.
“I should have stopped him,” Toby hissed under his breath to his cousin, who shrugged and eyed his dark haired employer with wariness.
“You think he’s worked it out?” the cousin whispered.
Toby eyed Logan sideways and shook his head. “No. He just thinks he has.”
Logan pondered the memory as he became snarled up in the traffic jam at the Flagstaff traffic lights. Guilt assailed him as he recalled ignoring his mother for the rest of the day, unable to cope with what she might tell him and not sure why it caused him so much fear. He convinced himself he’d misinterpreted the look the man gave him. Reuben was Michael’s father, Alfred said so. Michael was the illegitimate cuckoo in the family, a year older than Logan. It was Michael. Michael was Reuben’s son.
After the fire, Logan learned the truth. He was the rift between the brothers and the cause of the forty-year-old family split. He was Reuben’s son.
Logan sniffed with misery and tried to take deep breaths, flipping his visor up to try and calm himself as he sat in a queue near the turn onto Fairview Downs. He saw Hana’s vehicle appear in his wing mirror a few cars behind and tried to get a grip on himself. She had known about Reuben and Logan gritted his teeth. How did she know? They hadn’t spoken of it since that night and there was a dirty black stain on Logan’s heart, eating away at him from the inside.
Logan felt beyond redemption. Nothing could cure him, not even the pretty redhead or the beautiful little girl in the car seat next to her. “You’re all I ever wanted,” he whispered, “and I’m keeping you at arm’s length.” He’d reverted back to type, to being the man Caroline Marsh dated - hard, ruthless, numb and unreachable. I don’t want to be that person.
Logan concentrated on not crashing into the car in front of him, aware of the female driver giving him fearful glances in her rear view mirror. He backed off and decided. He would ask Hana how she knew Alfred was not his father, even before he did.
Chapter 5
Hana used her key-card access on the rear gate, entering the school complex slowly to avoid running over the boarders who spilled over the roadway. She heard the bell sound for tutor time and braked sharply as a group of boys started to run towards the main building, realising they were late.
Hana fought a wave of misery as she turned onto the narrow road between St Bart’s and the staff houses, driving towards her unit at the end. Phoenix slept soundly in the front seat and Hana parked as close as she could get, lowering the passenger window so she could hear her baby cry.
“Well that wasn’t very clever,” she complained, squeezing her slight body under the wing mirror and onto the steps. The gap was miniscule. She didn’t intend to be long. It was literally a flying visit.
Hana let herself into the unit. It was exactly as she left it. The couple lived out of a suitcase, not daring to put their stuff in the dingy cupboards or leave it out to acquire the horrid smell that was part of the fabric of the place. Hana wrinkled her nose at the awful musty stench, grateful she could spend a few nights at home instead. Only Phoenix had properly moved in, her cot and baby equipment installed in the tiny second bedroom.
“Come on girl, get out of here,” Hana chastised herself, snatching up the baby’s bedding. She negotiated the wing mirror with her arms full, unlocked the vehicle and shoved it onto the back seat. Then she went back for more. She brought the suitcase out and shoved it in before checking around for anything else they might need.
Spotting her pills on the draining board, Hana popped one into her mouth and swallowed, wedging the cardboard pack into her jeans pocket. Then she ran back out to the Honda. Phoenix was still asleep and Hana sighed with relief. She had forgotten how hard it was to nip into places with a car seat, child and related paraphernalia. She pressed the button to release the central locking again and opened the door.
“Hana, wait!”
She turned, fearful Caroline might catch her unawares again, but the male voice heralded the arrival of physical education teacher, Chris Carter. Hana felt her spine tense as Caroline’s former lover approached her with a smile on his cocky face. “I didn’t think you were still here,” she said with a smile, keeping the barb from her voice. Caroline was dismissed for engaging in a sexual relationship with a married colleague and Hana assumed Carter was too
His cheeks pinked and he shook his head. “No, I’m still here.”
Hana fixed a polite smile on her face, keeping hold of the door handle. “I’m in a hurry actually.” She tried to sound polite, but busy.
“How are things?” Chris Carter asked her and Hana’s brow knitted in confusion. He’d always pointedly ignored her.
“Fine thanks,” she answered, nodding and turning to leave.
“Hey,” he interrupted her escape, placing his hand over hers. He was good looking and slightly built, late twenties with striking blue eyes and a perfectly proportioned face. His blonde hair had been shaved short giving him more of a sporty look this year. “It’s good to have neighbours,” he said, indicating the unit next door to Hana’s and staring hard at her full lips.
Hana felt uncomfortable and looked at him with a question in her eyes. Carter moved his fingers over Hana’s in a stroking motion and she withdrew her hand.
“Angus is doing ours up at the same time as yours. We’ve...I’ve...well, Amanda’s living at her mum’s with the baby and I’ve been staying with a mate for a few months. She’s going to come back when this place is nicer, then I’ll probably move back in.”
Hana noticed he wasn’t sure whether he’d be welcomed back by his wife or not. She made no comment and there was an awkward silence. Carter breathed out in a snuffing sound and then smiled. “Your baby’s pretty, what’s her name?”
“Phoenix.”
He nodded. “I knew it was something unusual. I just couldn’t remember it.” He waved his arm expansively at the building behind them, encompassing his and hers. “Do you think they can make these any better?” he asked.
Hana shrugged, eager to get away from his lecherous, wandering hands. “I don’t know. They certainly couldn’t make them any worse. Ours is horrid.”
He nodded. “Amanda got depressed living here with the baby. It hasn’t been easy...” he trailed off as Hana willed her disobedient brain to stop reflecting on the other glaringly obvious cause of his wife’s depression. An adulterous husband could do that to a girl. “It’ll be nice for her,” he continued obliviously, “having someone else here with a baby.”
Hana nodded and smiled although it didn’t reach her eyes. Chris Carter moved in even closer, intruding into Hana’s personal space as she stood in the open car doorway. She tried not to panic as he leaned in and lowered his voice. “Caroline’s been coming round looking for your husband. I wanted to warn you. She’s majorly bad news.”
Hana held her breath, aware if she exhaled, her chest would touch his and she didn’t want that. She heard Logan’s motorbike before she saw it, roaring around the building from the soccer fields. She tried to anticipate what he might see as he rounded the corner and the awful conclusion he could come to, but it processed far too slowly for her. As Hana put her hands against Chris’ chest and pushed him away, Logan appeared around the end of the unit and drove straight at him.
“What the...?” Chris moved backwards from Hana’s hard push, struggling to keep his footing as he tripped over the kerb. Logan leapt from his bike and seized Carter by the throat, shoving him up against the side of St Bart’s. His motorbike lay on its side on the road rumbling away to itself, protesting as black smoke emerged from the exhaust.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Logan shouted into the other man’s face.
Hana collapsed in the driver’s seat of the Honda and covered her eyes with her hands, noticing Chris Carter’s shiny white trainers lifting off the floor in her peripheral vision. Logan dropped him to the ground and snarled into his face. “You touch my wife again and I’ll snap every one of your bloody fingers off!”
Then he picked his bike up and pulled it back onto the stand. He left it running to clear the oil and strode over to Hana, squatting in front of her. His grey eyes were alight and danced with livid anger. “You all right?” he asked.
She nodded slowly and hissed, “You didn’t have to do that!”
Logan looked hurt and surprised. “Oh.” His hair was ruffled from the bike ride and his fringe hung sexily over his right eye. He wasn’t wearing a helmet as he hadn’t left the school grounds and was in shirtsleeves and work trousers. “I sorted out my tutor group and came to see you before I teach my next class. I wanted to talk to you.”
Hana gulped. “I didn’t hear the bell ring from inside the unit,” she floundered. “And I was listening for the baby disturbing and wouldn’t have noticed.” She ran a hand over her face and blew out a slow breath, lowering her voice. “Actually, I’m glad you’re here; he was being really creepy.” Logan’s eyes narrowed in jealous anger and Hana put a hand on her husband’s broad shoulder. “It’s fine, but I’m just glad you came.”
Chris Carter stood rubbing his throat and flinched as Logan stood up and turned around. “What the hell were you doing?” the Māori asked him, his voice level as he began to calm.
“I was warning her...” Chris began, panicking as Logan’s eyes flashed dangerously. “About Caroline Marsh, I told her she was looking for you.”
Hana could almost hear Logan’s jaw grinding and his answer was stilted and spiky. “I don’t care,” he said, “and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll stay away from her as well, this time.”
Hana held her breath and hoped Logan wasn’t planning on thumping Carter. She understood the reasons why her husband was so possessive, but still struggled with that part of him. It made her infuriated and utterly in love with him at the same time.
Chris Carter moved warily away, jumping again as Logan reached to turn off his ailing bike. He edged around him and then moved briskly off, trying not to look as though he was running away.
Hana sighed and peeked at the baby. Phoenix still slumbered peacefully and missed her daddy assaulting a colleague. “You’ll be in so much trouble if someone reports you to Angus.” Hana said, trying to hide her irritation.
Logan leaned against the Honda resting his left arm along the roof of the vehicle. He looked at Hana and with the anger dissipated, appeared sorry for himself. “I saw him real close to you and you pushing him away and jumped to the wrong conclusion. I’m sorry, Han, I can’t seem to get my head straight at the moment.” Logan’s brow knitted as he picked at a flake of rust on the roof trim and Hana sensed herself melting with compassion. She ran her hand along his strong jawline and snuggled into Logan’s chest, feeling him exhale with relief as she slipped her arms around his waist. He kissed the top of her head and she felt one of his shirt buttons dig into her cheek as she cuddled in. “Hana,” his voice was deceptively gentle, “we need to talk.”
She grimaced and stamped her foot in a childish reaction. “I don’t want to talk.” She pressed her face into his shirt and sniffed in his scent. He smelled delicious and she let her fingers rove until they slipped into the back of his trousers.
Logan laughed out loud and pulled her hands in front of him. “Loving the distraction technique, Mrs Du Rose, but we have to face some of the stuff that’s coming up. Like the court case.”
Hana put her fingers in her ears and refused to listen. The last thing she wanted to think about was the court case in which they would both have to give evidence against Michael Laval. Logan pulled her hands away. “I know this is hard, babe. He hounded you for more than a year and tried to kill me. But we need to make sure he stays in prison so he can’t cheat any more elderly widows out of their savings.” He massaged her hands with tender strokes and kissed her neck. “Babe, we need to get stuff straight. I want to talk about the case and how we manage the baby while we’re both in court. There’re things up at the hotel I need to tell you about and there’s all this here. We need to decide if it’s worth the effort to help Angus out. And there’s something else.”
Hana opened her mouth to speak, Logan’s final sentence intriguing her. But further talk was halted by the arrival of a white van pulling up behind the Honda. The road was only wide enough for two cars to pass each other and Hana’s car blocked half of it. Logan eyed the three men who piled out of the van wearing white overalls covered in splatters of different coloured paint. They lined up in front of the couple and the older of the three ventured, “Is this the place we’re doing up?” He pointed at the door behind the Honda.
Logan nodded and smiled, offering them his hundred-watt beam and banishing the air of menace which hung around even after Chris Carter scarpered. “Yeah, bro. That’s it. Good luck with it; it’s a bloody mess!”
They relaxed and Hana untangled herself from her husband’s arms. She reached up to kiss him on the lips before climbing into the driver’s seat and starting the engine. “See you later, Loge,” she said with a smile of promise.
Logan shifted his bike from in front of the Honda and they both left, Logan less quietly than his wife as the bike objected to the oil mixture in its petrol from the unexpected lie down. Logan rode around the staff complex, revving to try to push the mess around the engine and blasting across the soccer and cricket fields to give it more of a run. He saw the groundsman waving and waved back, knowing the man was purple with rage and not caring. He did a wheelie and as he turned, watched the dust trail behind him like a line of smoke. Then he rode back to the car park in front of the Chapel and parked up, feeling much better.
Hana took herself and her daughter up Maui Street to the rest home where Father Sinbad had lived for the last fifteen years. Although he was blind, he loved having them visit and hearing their news. Hana sat on his bed and fed Phoenix while voicing her fears about the looming court case.
“Do ye have a date yet me darlin’?” he asked in his thick, Irish brogue.
Hana shook her head and then remembered he couldn’t see her. “No, not yet. But it can’t be too far off. Laval’s on remand at the moment and the cops got two of his guys. Flick’s still hiding up at the hotel, the Asian man’s dead but I can’t help thinking there’s more to it somehow. I keep going over who I saw where and which men came after me, but I have this feeling I’ve missed something important.”
The old Catholic priest put his head back against the headrest of his wheelchair and smiled, the sunshine from the large bedroom window warming his lined face. “What
does yer man, Bodie think?” he asked, referring to Hana’s policeman-son and she screwed up her face.
“I’m not sure. He’ll be called as a witness so he’s careful not to discuss it with me. It’s difficult for him because he knows Flick’s up at the hotel as a fugitive. It compromises him professionally.”
“Which one’s Flick again?” Father Sinbad asked.
“He’s the one who infiltrated Laval’s organisation and came after me. He thought I had the deeds to his stepmother’s property and wanted to get them back before Laval found them. Logan offered him a lifeline after hearing his story and hid him on the mountain property.”
“Aye. I remember. Youse wasn’t real pleased about that.”
“No. Flick hurt me and I was scared of him. I thought Logan had lost his mind.”
“But now?” Sinbad turned his head in Hana’s direction, waiting for her reply, his blind eyes flicking from side to side.
“He’s proved loyal so I need to get used to it,” she replied. “Logan seems to know what he’s doing. He wants to talk to me about the court case and I’m avoiding it.” She sat the baby up to wind her, patting her on the back gently and holding up her tiny head as it wobbled on her hand. “Logan thinks there’s something not right about the whole thing. I mean, yes, Laval was the right man, he set up the old ladies and defrauded them out of their money, but Logan thinks there was someone else in the background. He’s certain the detectives know it too. I remember him saying when the cops arrested the old man at the lake that night, he wasn’t who they thought and were disappointed. At the time, Logan didn’t care. They’d beaten him up, dumped him in the water and left him to drown. He wanted it over so he could come and get me.” Hana trailed off, thinking of their less than cordial reunion.
“Ah yes,” smiled Father Sinbad, “you’d gone to Invercargill to see dat beautiful daughter of yourn. In a strop!”
“I wasn’t in a strop!” countered Hana and then smiled to herself, “I was actually, a big one too.” She sniggered to herself, adding, “I’m not going to do that again in a hurry. Gosh, Logan was so mad when he finally caught up with me.” Hana bit her lip and smirked, remembering his hands as he showed her how much he’d missed her in a double bed they shared in Izzie’s back bedroom.
