But Jackson would never find out.
Ko would never tell.
Chapter Six
A week after the video release, Jackson slipped back into routine. By the time the week ended, he was finished revamping a few things in Together We Stand and shipped it off to the next set of eyes that would go over it again before it even made it to the beta testers. On Saturday, he’d promised to help his father with putting in a new deck on the house. The existing one had been there since before Jackson had been born and was starting to show its age.
When he arrived, his father was nowhere to be seen. He let himself into the house and disarmed the alarm. Once that was out of the way, he removed his shoes and headed into the kitchen to pour himself something to drink then wandered into his father’s office. On the wall across from his dad’s desk was a picture of Jackson. It was one of the first ad campaigns he’d ever done—for a sports car. It had come out better than Jackson had thought it would, especially since he didn’t see himself as particularly handsome. When people had started offering him money to pose for them—for clothes and cars and the like—he had taken the gigs while doing his dancing. A movie company had even offered him quite a large sum to take off his clothes—all his clothes.
Jackson had politely declined but had been secretly flattered.
He took another sip and rested his ass to the front of his father’s desk. Slowly, he dragged a lazy palm over the hard surface. With a sigh, he eased forward and wandered around the office, peering at the books. They were all leather-bound and quite expensive. His father didn’t mind people touching them and he wasn’t the type to force anyone to wear protective gloves. To his dad, books were meant to be read—leather-bound or otherwise. Jackson came across a first edition of Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol and pulled it from the shelf. He skipped to the part where Marley’s ghost arrived. It was always his favorite section.
After reading the scene, he set the book back and fell into his father’s leather chair. He never had liked the feel of the thing, but swirling it around, the view of the garden at the side of the house took his breath away. It always had, ever since Jackson had been a boy.
But as he’d grown older, things between him and his father had become strained. For one, his dad had stopped him from seeing Darius. Darius was the one man in the family Jackson felt any type of connection to. Darius always understood Jackson, when even his own father didn’t. When Darius’ guidance had been taken away, Jackson’s world had ended. The reason for the breakup of the family, was that his dad wasn’t too keen on the whole gay thing. When Darius had come out of the closet, Jackson’s father had flipped and all but disowned Darius. It took Jackson coming out for his father to go crawling back to Darius, begging for forgiveness and help dealing with his gay son.
Jackson took another sip and turned away from the picture. After his drink, his dad was still not back so he got comfortable on the sofa. His mind slipped to Ko Takao. Though Ko was his to be his boss in a few weeks, Jackson couldn’t help wondering what lay beneath his hard exterior.
Their dance had turned Jackson on. He hadn’t been sure Ko would agree to it, but Jackson was happy he had. Even as he lay there, waiting for his father, Jackson got hard. Ko’s perfect body was against his—
“Jack? Jack, you here?”
“Yeah, Dad!” Jackson got up and pulled his clothes in place before leaving the office to meet his father in the kitchen. “Hey.”
“Sorry I’m late coming back.” He poured himself some juice and took a long drink. “Who knew selling a business was this much of a headache.”
“Uncle Darius warned you.”
“Yeah. I just need some peace, Jack. I don’t want to miss any more of your life. Are you seeing anyone?”
Jackson choked on air.
“What?” his dad asked.
“Um…I…um… No. I’m not seeing anyone. Dad, seriously, we don’t have to talk about my sex life or lack thereof. I know you were never a hundred percent on board with what Uncle Darius and I are.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way. I may have been a moron when this whole journey started, but look how happy Darius is with Feng. How can I still hold any form of resentment or hatred about being gay? That’s a love I—”
“Dad?”
“I never found that love with your mother. I mean, I loved her but it wasn’t that deep love I see every time Darius and Feng glance at each other. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be telling you this.”
“It’s the truth, right?”
Kent nodded.
“Then nothing to be sorry about. After Mom died, you remained single. Why?”
“I don’t know. For a while, I figured that would make you happy and keep you safe. After all, there are some weirdos out there, you know? Then after you became an adult it was just easier.”
“It’s never too late.”
“Yeah, right. No one wants an old man.”
“Ko Takao is younger than you,” Jackson said sarcastically.
His father arched an eyebrow. “The designer and your new boss? Yeah. Why?”
Jackson hesitated. He wasn’t sure how much he should tell his father. Though his dad said he was fine with the gay thing, Jackson couldn’t be certain. He licked his lips and climbed on one of the stools. “I asked him to dance the other night at the video release party.”
“Right.”
“And I want him, Dad.”
“Jack, he’s your boss.”
Jackson rubbed his eyes. “I shouldn’t have said anything. Let’s start working on pulling off the old deck.” He eased from the stool and tried to get by his father, but was stopped when Kent grabbed his arm.
“You don’t trust me,” Kent said. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s not that. It just feels weird telling my…father…that I am interested in someone that isn’t remotely appropriate. I don’t even know why I mentioned it. Ko’s friends with Thaddeus, so chances are he’s all moral and stuff. I’m on his no-go list.”
“No-go list? Is this a gay thing?”
Jackson laughed. “No. It’s like, for straight men—dating their best friend’s sister. That kind of thing.”
“Oh, right. Sorry.”
“It’s fine. Come on, this deck is not going to pull apart itself.”
“Okay. Let me grab the gloves and the tools. I had the guys put the garbage container in the backyard so it’s easy to get the old materials out.”
“Perfect. Trucking it to the front yard would add days to our work.”
His dad chuckled. “Gimme a sec.”
It didn’t take his father long and soon they were dressed in construction gear and were taking their frustration out on prying board and nails from an old build. They worked well into the day, stopped for something to eat before going back and finishing up the demolition.
“I’m exhausted,” Kent said. “This was supposed to be a bonding thing for us but I don’t know if us building the deck back by ourselves is a good idea.”
Jackson laughed. “I’m going to go out on a limb and say it’s because neither of us ever built anything in our lives.”
“That is true.”
“Look, Dad. How about we find something else to bond over?” Jackson laughed. “Like, traveling or building a model airplane. Maybe not something that needs to be structurally sound.”
His dad nodded. “I’ll start getting quotes on Monday. Did you mean it about us finding something else?”
“Why wouldn’t I mean it?”
Kent shrugged. “I don’t know. I just— I had to ask.”
For years, Ko wanted to change his workout routine. It took Thaddeus to help him do that with routines that were constantly changing, evolving. Ko delved into the workout mixed martial arts fighters used to stay fit, agile and strong. With his legs shoulder-width apart, he lowered himself, gripped the two pieces of rope, and got as comfortable as the position would allow. He bent slightly forward to take the strain off his back and made waves wit
h the heavy ropes. With that routine finished, he did burpees followed by push-ups and crunches. He skipped cardio and was moving on to some strength training when he noticed a crowd had gathered at the far side of the gym, staring into the dance room. Curious, he abandoned his training and headed over.
He managed to make his way through some of the bodies to the front and stood there, arms folded over his sweaty chest, staring at the vision before him. He knew Jackson Stark could dance, but holy shit!
His mouth was dry. His palms began sweating even as he unfolded his arms and rubbed them against his thighs. His body burned and all Jackson was doing was moving across the floor as if Julliard was his alma mater. When he stopped, everyone around Ko erupted in applause and whistled. Jackson grinned boyishly, did a few bows and a couple of fake curtsies, which made the crowd roar with laughter and more applause. Ko smiled as Jackson first bowed. Jackson’s smile disappeared when his gaze met Ko’s. The young man picked up his towel and headed out the other way.
Ko frowned and jogged around the glass partition.
“Jackson!”
“Hey.”
“You’re running from me.”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” Jackson passed the towel against the back of his neck. “You’re my boss. I don’t want to spend my private time with you, too.”
Those words hurt Ko but he cleared his throat. “I didn’t know you could dance like that—even though I saw you in the video.”
Jackson smiled. “Thank you?”
“It is a compliment, I promise,” Ko said. “Anyway, listen. I have the concept for the first shoot you’ll be doing soon. Do you want to grab a coffee and go over it?”
“I…”
“We won’t be alone, Jackson. Priya will be there, too.”
“She’s back?”
“She comes back tonight. So I was thinking on Saturday around four, if you’re not busy.”
“I don’t really have a choice, do I? I do work for you and that’s a part of the job.”
“Come on, Jackson. Why are you like this?”
Jackson’s shoulders rose almost to his ears then fell. “Sorry. It’s been a weird morning and I’m waiting to hear back from an audition. I get cranky when I’m waiting on something.”
“Maybe you need someone to teach you a little patience.” Ko smirked.
Jackson tilted his head. “Many have tried. All have failed.”
“That’s because you haven’t had the right teacher.” Ko couldn’t help himself. Flirting with Jackson just seemed to be something that came naturally.
“I see. Well, I’m always open to learning,” Jackson said, strapping the towel around his neck.
“That’s good to hear. So are we on for Saturday?”
“Tell me where and I’ll be there.”
Ko smiled. “Well, I have an amazing backyard.”
Jackson nodded. “Sure. If you text me the address, I’ll be there.”
“I will. It was good seeing you. I know I haven’t been in touch for a little bit but I didn’t want to seem as if I was stalking you. Do you always dance here?”
“No, my studio is fully booked so I needed a place to practice and Charlie said I could do it here.”
“Charlie?”
“Yeah, a—friend.”
“I see. Anyway, I’ll see you Saturday.” Ko didn’t wait for Jackson to reply. Instead, he turned and walked away, feeling like a moron. Obviously, Jackson had a man from the way he’d said ‘Charlie’. With a frown, he mentally kicked his own ass until after his workout ended and he climbed into his vehicle. All the way home, each time Jackson came to mind, he forcefully pushed the image to the deepest corner of his mind.
That night, he rested on his back on the deck behind his house and stared up at the sky. It was a clear night and the stars twinkled beautifully above him. The soft, cool air swirled about him, giving him the chance to really breathe. In that moment, he allowed memories of his father to bathe over him. On purpose, he stuck to the good times—though they had been few. Good times like when his father had craved ice cream and they would sit on a chair beneath the sycamore tree in the backyard and eat chocolate fudge ice cream from the same container. That stopped the moment Ko had hit seventeen. He’d kept hoping his father would share a jar with him, but after his seventeenth birthday it had never happened again. As an adult, their quiet father-son moments had been rare. On the off occasion when the two of them had agreed on every aspect of a design, or agreed with the direction a project had been going—those instances might be reaching, but Ko treasured them.
The shrill ring of his cell phone jarred him from his thoughts and without looking, Ko answered it.
“Ko! It’s Thaddeus.”
“Hey, Thad. What’s up?”
“Nothing. What you doing right this minute?”
“Lying on the deck.”
Thaddeus paused. “Did you throw your back out again? I keep telling you we weren’t made to bend like that but you never listen.”
“Funny.” Ko chuckled. “No. It’s dark enough to see the stars so I was trying to put a few things in perspective.”
“Well, listen, I was invited to a little shinding at a friend’s tonight and was told I could invite you. You in?”
“Which friend?”
“Darius and Feng. Feng scored a kick-ass gig with Jaded X Magazine.”
Ko sat up instantly. He arched an eyebrow. “Um…I don’t know.”
“Seriously, Taka? You’re not doing anything at home. Let’s go out. Besides, it would be good to see you.”
“Thaddeus, it’s just that— I don’t think it’s a good idea because I’ve been fantasizing about Jackson.”
Thaddeus went quiet.
“Thaddeus? You there?”
“Yeah.” Thaddeus cleared his throat. “You see something you like. I can dig that.”
“No. It’s a horrible thing.”
“Give me one good reason why.”
Ko paused to count off his reasons on his fingers. “Well, for one, he’s Darius’ nephew. Two, I’m his boss. Three, he has a man and four, Jackson is too young.”
“He’s in his late twenties. You’re…thirty-seven. I don’t think that’s such a big gap.”
Ko sighed. “Probably not. But even if the other points are moot, he is involved with someone and I’m no homewrecker.”
“Then if he is dating, it shouldn’t be a problem. You know what the right thing to do is.”
“I don’t want to be an extra wheel, man. It feels like shit and I hate it. You’ll have Ravi and Darius has Feng and Jackson has Charlie. I’m just going to take a shower and crawl into bed.”
“Okay. If you change your mind you know where we’ll be.”
Ko hung up and flopped to his back once again.
But in the end, he wound up at the damn party, anyway. “Hey, Mr. Stark,” Ko said, handing over a bottle of wine. “I didn’t want to come empty-handed. Congrats on the new gig.”
“I love when people call me that—Mr. Stark.” The Chinese man grinned brightly.
“I figured as much,” Ko said with a laugh.
“And you. I’m glad you could make it. Thaddeus said you weren’t coming.”
“I wasn’t going to but the silence at home was driving me crazy.”
“I know we aren’t that close, but if you want to talk…”
“Um, no.” Ko thought about it then shook his head. “No, I’m good. Thanks for offering. I will remember that.”
Feng nodded. “Thanks for the wine. Come in, there’s food in the backyard. Wine is in the cooler in the kitchen, beer in the back, and I think Thaddeus and Darius are around here somewhere.”
Ko grinned. “I’ll find them.” He left Feng and hurried through the living room, then the kitchen and out the back door. He found Thaddeus with Ravinder sitting across his lap, Darius was turning meat on the grill, and Jackson and some man—who had to be Charlie—were trying to get a group of Chinese lanterns to inflate. Ko tried
not staring. He tried not being weird about the whole picture and hoped he succeeded. Plastering a smile on his face, he stepped through the door and the others looked up.
“Hey!” Thaddeus cheered. “Didn’t think you were coming.”
“Yeah,” Ko said.
Darius hugged him and handed him a beer. Thankful, he accepted and took a drink. He made his way around to hug Thaddeus and Ravinder but avoided Jackson and his man like the plague.
Chapter Seven
There was something so immeasurably sexy about a man wearing a graphic T-shirt, black leather jacket and black jeans. Ko made the outfit a visual aphrodisiac and Jackson was stuck around loved ones, having to hide his arousal. Jackson barely ate anything. He pushed enough into his mouth so Darius or Feng wouldn’t question it, but each bite made him feel ill.
As the night wore on, though he managed to be involved in what was happening around him, Jackson kept his eyes on Ko. He’d tossed bits and pieces into the conversation, pretending all was well so Charlie or the others wouldn’t ask any questions.
Each time their gazes happened to meet, Ko didn’t so much as smile. It was a stark change from the gym. The light in Ko’s gaze no longer existed—that smoldering look of dare that caused Jackson’s body to pulse in ways it hadn’t before. There was, however, something that fired through the designer’s eyes that left Jackson curious and turned on. It was a new kind of desire that promised untold pleasures. Jackson needed that. When their little game of cat and mouse was too much, Jackson rose.
“You’re leaving?” Charlie asked
“No. I have to…use the bathroom.”
It was a lie. But Jackson didn’t want to have another one of those conversations with Charlie. It was jumbled enough in his head and he knew he wouldn’t have any answers to the questions Charlie would ask. He wasn’t paying much attention and crashed into Darius as he rounded a corner to head up the stairs.
“Whoa! What’s your rush?” Darius asked.
Lost In You Page 6
