by Lex Martin
When she doesn’t say anything, frustration gets the best of me. “Put yourself in my shoes, Jo. Would you have wanted to deliver the bad news to my mom? So yes, I procrastinated. I’m not proud of that, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her that her husband of almost thirty years couldn’t keep it in his goddamn pants.” I scrub my face with my palm. “Anyway, I felt like I owed it to my mother to tell her first before I talked to Ethan or anyone else about it.”
“I know that was a rough time for you,” she whispers. For a moment, it looks like she wants to say more, but doesn’t.
We’re quiet for a long stretch as I mull over the events of the last few days. “I had no idea Samantha was so unhinged. I feel responsible. Like I triggered her or something.”
Joey fiddles with a tie on her hospital gown. “Samantha told me she was your girlfriend. That y’all have been together for years, and Zach was your son.”
Pure hot rage boils up in me at the thought of Samantha trying to manipulate Joey. That she went to such lengths to hurt my girl. No wonder Joey didn’t want to see me while she’s been in the hospital. “Samantha and I have never been like that. Honestly, the idea grossed me out. She slept with my dad and then wanted to get with me?” I shudder. “No, thanks.”
“What… what happened to her? After she knocked me out, I mean.” Joey glances at the door. “Is she here? Do I need to be worried she’s going to come after me again?”
“No. She’s not here. She was arrested the night she attacked you, but I’ve been camped outside your door since you were admitted, so even if she was on the loose, she’d never get to you.” I sigh, relief rushing through me to finally see Bitsy. “I swear to God, Jo. I’ve never been more scared than coming home to find you like that.”
Needing a moment, I lean forward and close my eyes. “After she took a goddamn bat to your head, she stuffed you in the closet.” The cops found the bloody bat under my couch.
I share the details of how I came home and the strange conversation I had with Samantha before Rambo started barking.
“Rambo found me?”
For the first time in days, I smile. “He did. Our little guy wouldn’t stop barking at the hallway closet. He knew you were in there.” But the smile drops off my face when I remember how close I was to losing her. “Jo, there was so much blood. I was terrified, baby.” I reach for her hand, and she lets me take it. “The doctor told me that if Samantha had shifted a hair to the right, she could’ve crushed your eye socket. If I’d come home any later, you could’ve died.”
I clear my throat. “I’m so fucking sorry for everything, Jo. For putting you in this position. If I had just told you what was going on, you could’ve protected yourself.” As gently as possible, I hug her. She’s stiff in my arms, and I get it. I fucked up. Badly. Even if Jo forgives me for what happened, I’m not sure I can forgive myself. I let her go, hoping like hell she’ll give me another chance.
The door opens behind us, and I turn to wipe my eyes.
“What’s up, assholes?” Silas smirks from his wheelchair. He’s being pushed by a petite blonde.
Joey sniffles and tries to stand. I hold her elbow so she doesn’t wobble. I don’t think she realizes the toll her body’s been through.
“What happened to you, Silas?” she asks quietly.
I smile at my former best friend, not caring one bit about the dumb shit he’s said about me and my family over the years. In the moment of our greatest need, he was there. But more than anything, he came through for his sister. “Silas is the one who saved your life. Mine too, probably.”
Silas chuckles and points to me with the hand that’s not in a sling. “That bitch was waving a gun in Logan’s face, and your crazy-ass boyfriend is hovering over your body and trying to help you. He’s freaking the fuck out. There’s blood everywhere. And Logan sounds just like Clint Eastwood in Dirty Harry when he tells that psycho, ‘The only way I’m going anywhere with you is if you shoot me and drag my dead body along.’”
He’s talking like he’s recapping some Red Dead Redemption, all laid back and shit, but I know better. Silas was just as upset as I was that his sister was hurt.
“Your brother came over that day to apologize for that argument you guys had.” I give him a pointed look before I continue. The sheepish expression on his face tells me he hasn’t made it yet to Joey. “He overheard the yelling from the front porch and saw you were hurt. He flew through the air like a damn ninja and took down Samantha. He ended up with a bullet to his shoulder, but still managed to restrain her so I could try to stop your bleeding until the paramedics arrived.”
Joey gasps. “Oh, my God. Are you serious?” She reaches over to hug him and almost lands on her ass. I grab her just in time to keep her from toppling over.
“Whoa, there. Not sure you’re ready for that maneuver yet.” As I stabilize Joey, I grin at Silas, whose face is turning red. He’s not used to being the center of attention.
“No big deal, really,” he says gruffly.
“It was a big deal,” I note. “Since Silas had just gone through rehab, he refused the good painkillers after the doctor dug that slug out of his shoulder.”
I’m glad to see he’s straightening out his life. It’s been a long time coming. But I shouldn’t talk. I’ve had my own shit to work out too, I suppose.
Even though he’s been banged up, Silas looks pretty good. But that’s what Beverly Carter’s home-cooked meals will do for a man. When my mother heard he came to our rescue and basically saved our lives, she parked him in the guest bedroom to recover and made him three squares a day.
“But why are you in a wheelchair? Did you get hurt anywhere else?” Joey looks him up and down, fear etched on her pretty face.
“Nah. Darlene here just offered me a ride. I’m gonna offer her another kind of ride later.” He winks at his nurse friend over his shoulder, and I snicker while Joey rolls her eyes.
It’s surreal to be having a normal conversation with Silas again after all these years.
He points at me and cocks an eyebrow. “Did lover boy here tell you he got shot too?”
“What?” Joey’s eyes widen.
“It’s nothing. Just grazed my thigh.” Mostly.
“Jesus. She shot both of you?” Joey asks, her expression stricken.
“I got nicked when Silas tackled her, and he got a slug when they went scrambling for the gun, but he got the worst of it.”
A smile pulls at my lips when she wobbles toward her brother and leans down to hug him again. I reach behind her and close her hospital gown before she flashes everyone.
“Knock, knock.” One of the nurses comes in with the cops on her heels. “Josephine, the police need to take your statement, and I’m thinking you’ve been out of bed long enough this afternoon.”
“Jo, I’ll be out here if you need anything,” I say as the nurse ushers us out. I’m not sure what I’m looking for. Just something to know Joey understands, that she gets why I did what I did. But she doesn’t make eye contact. She doesn’t say anything. Just gets back into bed slowly.
My heart sinks as I wonder if I’ve fucked up too bad this time. Because I’m not sure she’s gonna forgive me.
45
Joey
Squinting into the bright sun, I take a deep breath. Cedar and a hint of barbecue scent the air. My stomach grumbles. At least I’m starting to get my appetite back, but I still feel pretty crappy.
Yes, I have stitches on my head and a gnarly concussion and bruises everywhere, but that’s not what hurts the most.
Even though I got the full story from Logan yesterday, or what I’m hoping is the full story, I’m still wrecked.
Because deep down, I don’t know if I can trust him.
Granted, two years of keeping this enormous secret is exponentially better than seven or eight, and knowing Zach is his brother and not his son is huge, but my heart is still battered and my faith in Logan is shot. I guess a baseball bat to the brain will do that to a gir
l.
The nurse wheels me to the curb where three trucks are lined up: Ethan’s, Logan’s, and Brady’s.
Guilt tightens my chest for not wanting to see my friends when they stopped by the hospital. Even after I spoke with Logan and somewhat cleared the air, I wasn’t ready to see anyone. I don’t know if I am now, but everyone’s here, and the hospital is releasing me, so it’s not like I can hide out anywhere. I’m a little ashamed I want to. I’m embarrassed for so many things, but I can’t begin to decipher why I feel this way.
My doctor said “emotional lability” is one of the side effects of this kind of head injury, and I can expect mood swings and extreme highs and lows as a result.
I’m definitely in touch with the lows.
Ethan and Tori hop out and the next thing I know, I have a bouquet of flowers in my arms and Tori hugs me.
I pat her awkwardly. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be on your honeymoon?”
She pulls back like I slapped her. “Didn’t Logan tell you? We postponed everything for two weeks.”
“Oh, my God, why?”
“Because of you, knucklehead. Look at you. You can barely stand, and you have two black eyes. I can’t believe that wench did this to you.” Now she’s crying.
“Ugh. Please don’t tell me I ruined your wedding.” I’d cry too if I had to postpone my wedding.
“No! What? Of course not! We just want to make sure you’re better so you can be a part of it.”
Ethan squats down next to me. “I’m so fucking glad you’re okay, squirt. I’m sorry you got the brunt of this.” He gives my hand a squeeze, and emotion brims in his eyes.
“It’s okay. It wasn’t your fault.”
Everyone gets quiet, and someone coughs. Logan. He’s got his hands in his pockets.
“Now, y’all,” Beverly interjects, bumping Ethan out of the way. “Don’t you blame Logan. This started because he was covering for me. And… and he couldn’t bear to tell me what Daniel had done.” She sniffs, and Ethan wraps his arms around her shoulders. I can’t imagine what she must be going through after finding out that her husband had a child with another woman. I’d be devastated.
She pokes Ethan. “Did y’all know Logan’s been working nights? All those times we teased him about carousing, he was putting in hours at the Stock Yard so he could pay for child support when it wasn’t even his kid? So he could pay for my medications and procedures. Don’t you give him grief on top of everything else.”
Bev kneels down next to me. “Honey, I wanted to let you know that I’m good with Silas. He’s apologized for being a jackass, and I’ve accepted, especially after he jumped in to help y’all the way he did, but the truth is he’s one of the reasons Logan didn’t tell you what was going on. He was afraid your brother would read your texts like he did a few years ago. That he’d learn something he shouldn’t and blab it around town to hurt us like he did in the past. You know what a hothead Silas was when he got messed up.”
Huh. That does make sense.
I nod slowly, embarrassment over my messed-up family creeping up on me. Of course Logan was afraid to tell me anything with my doped-up brother always in my business. “I hear what you’re saying.”
Ethan pulls his mother up off the sidewalk. “Cool down there, Ma. I get all that, but no one told Logan he had to go it alone.”
Bev smacks his chest. “Did you hear what I said? I made him swear he wouldn’t tell you about my medical situation. And then, well, everything avalanched after that.”
Logan makes his way closer, and he squeezes his mom’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I understand what Ethan’s saying. I should’ve been honest.” He turns to Ethan. “Bro, I swear I was gonna come clean after your wedding. It took you so fucking long to get to a place where you were happy, where you weren’t stressed out over the ranch and Allison’s demands, and I didn’t want to bring you down again. But you’re right—this is a big deal. I screwed up and nearly got Joey killed.” His voice gets rough, and he clears his throat.
“I’m okay, everyone. Seriously.” I try to ease myself out of the wheelchair. Four hands land on my arms to steady me. “No one needs to be blaming anyone on my account, except maybe the lady who picked up the bat.”
Samantha was arrested, and at least I don’t have to worry about her stalking me anymore.
According to the police, who searched her apartment over the weekend, they found a notebook full of details about me—places I worked, where I hung out, names of my friends, and photos from my Instagram. I told them how I thought she was the woman who got me fired, and we discussed the likelihood that she’s also the person who vandalized my grandmother’s car last winter.
I rub my temple, wishing I was in a bed so I could curl up. “Really. I’m fine.”
The words surprise me. I don’t know I feel that way until the words are out of my mouth.
I mean, I am fine. I’m bruised, and I’m at the center of too much drama, but I’m alive. That has to count for something.
Looking back and forth between the brothers, I sigh. “Don’t y’all have better things to do than be upset with each other? Hug it out or something.”
Tori gives me a grateful smile, wiping her eyes. Strangely, I’m not crying at the Hallmark commercial in front of me when Logan and Ethan do that bro hug thing.
Mostly, I feel numb and disconnected and want to go home.
I don’t even know where that’s supposed to be. Where is home for me now?
The one thing I do know is I don’t want to go home with Logan.
46
Logan
Low voices in the kitchen come to an abrupt halt when Zach and I enter. Ethan gives me a nod. Tori gives me a halfhearted smile and pours me coffee. Yeah, we’ve been a hot mess since shit went down with Samantha.
I knew my brother would be upset that I’d kept so much from him, but it’s a painful realization to think I might have damaged something permanently in our relationship. He worshipped our father, so I’m sure the news that Daniel Carter was a womanizing playboy behind the backs of his devoted wife and family has hit Ethan hard.
I motion to Zach. “Hey, buddy, why don’t you go wash your hands so you can eat breakfast.”
The kid has been staying with me, but I bring him to Ethan’s every day to play with Mila and Cody. The police let me keep him after I showed them the DNA tests I had done when Samantha initially brought him around. I’m supposed to check in with Children’s Protective Services, but since Samantha is probably going to prison for the foreseeable future, my lawyer says they won’t care who gets the kid as long as he’s with family.
It’s a depressing thought, the idea that we could shuffle him around like a chess piece and no one would give a shit. I told Ethan I want to petition for custody, so Zach knows I want him. Ethan is supportive and says he plans to be in Zach’s life every step of the way and help pay for whatever he needs.
And Joey? She’s staying at Kat and Brady’s. She says she needs time to think, so aside from talking to her at the hospital, I haven’t seen her since. Not for almost a week. It’s fucking killing me.
She’ll return my texts, but she doesn’t carry on conversation. Just answers my questions. I stop by there every day and drop off flowers. Sometimes a stuffed animal or some pie from the diner. Things I hope she likes. Mostly I want her to know I’m thinking about her and sorry as hell I hurt her.
Kat and Tori are worried about her. They tell me she doesn’t say much. That she was pretty shaken by the attack and doesn’t seem like herself even though the bruises are fading.
A knock at the front door makes me turn. “You expecting anyone?” I call out. Not sure why I ask because I’m opening the door before I hear the response.
Solemn gray eyes stare back at me.
“Jojo. Hey.” I’m so damn excited to see her, she’s in my arms before I realize she might not want me hugging her. And ain’t that a kick to the nuts. I let her go and step back. “Sorry. Don’t k
now if you’re still sore or anything.”
She shakes her head. “I’m better. Thanks.”
“How’d you get here?”
“Kat dropped me off.”
When we get to the kitchen, Ethan and Tori bound over to give her gentle hugs. Zach tugs on my shirt, and I clear my throat. I don’t know why, but I’m nervous as hell at the thought of introducing the kid. It’s not fair that he gets any residual shade because his mother went off the deep end, though, and I’m really hoping Joey feels the same way.
“This is our brother Zach. Zach, this is my… my best friend Joey.” I almost call her my girlfriend, but right now, I’m not sure she is. It’s gut-wrenching to think we might not work out, but I don’t want to pressure her.
I hold my breath as he grins up at her.
Her eyes soften. “It’s nice to finally meet you. Your brothers have said such wonderful things about you. I know they’re really happy to have you here on the ranch.”
The kid looks like he falls in love with her a little. I know how that feels, buddy. Of course she put him at ease. I don’t know why I doubted her.
After a few minutes of conversation, Joey leans over to me. “Can we talk?”
“Of course.” My heart beats erratically, and I wipe my palms on my jeans.
When we reach the living room, she settles on the couch. I join her, anxious as hell to hear what she wants to say.
“I’m sorry I haven’t been ready to talk. Mostly, I haven’t felt like myself. But thank you for the gifts. They’ve been thoughtful.”
“I’m so relieved you’re feeling better.”
“Logan, I want you to know I’m not trying to punish you. I understand why you did what you did.” She sounds so resigned, the tone of her voice morose, and the hope in my chest deflates.
“But?”
“But I’m not going to lie. It really hurt my feelings that you didn’t tell me about Zach. That you had a second job. That you were helping this… this woman. You have so many secrets, Logan.” Her eyes shift to the ground. “How can I trust you now?”
