A hush settled over the Ascended, and this time they drew back even more. Nerissa sensed it too. Her emotions skewed wildly as she realized that she was losing her influence over them. I slipped even deeper into her mind and held tighter onto Jacob. I still had no idea what Nerissa’s backup plan was, she had buried it so deep, but I sensed I had only seconds to discover it.
If only the Ascended could sense Nerissa past the façade. Then there would be no argument. Even as the thought came to me, I felt her gathering her will. Sorrow for what I had to do almost made me hesitate, but I steeled myself.
“Forgive me, Nerissa,” I whispered in her mind, and with all my strength, I tore down her wall as she screamed. Around us, the Ascended flickered in and out of reality, and we were tumbling through time.
Chapter 31
CURSES FLOODED my mind, but my throat was frozen, and I couldn’t let any of them out. “Kristair! What the fuck is happening?” I could still sense my lover, and his mind was far calmer than my own. That alone kept me from completely losing my goddamn mind.
As abruptly as it started, it ended, and I found myself on a tiled floor, gasping for breath. I sat up, my head spinning, and looked around at the locker room at Pittsburgh. “Jacob! Are you okay? Where are you?”
I grabbed my skull as Kristair’s voice crashed through it. “Fuck, Kristair. Not so loud.” I scrambled to my knees and realized that I was alone. I couldn’t see him or Nerissa anywhere. “I’m in my old locker room. Where are you?”
“The stadium. It’s empty. We have to find Nerissa; she’s somewhere close. We have to stop her.”
I heard the door to the locker room open and I stared in confusion up at Coach Latimer as he came around the corner to my row and glared at me. I hadn’t seen him since graduation, though I’d intended on stopping by to catch when practice started for him.
“Corvin!” Coach barked, his eyes narrowing even more in displeasure.
Old instinct had me scrambling to my feet. “Coach?”
“Do you think you’re on vacation? At some fancy day spa where you get pampered? Get suited up and get out there with the others!”
Before I could stammer an explanation or ask what the fuck was going on, Coach was gone. “Kristair. Please tell me what the hell is going on. I feel so fucking weird, like my skin is on backward.”
“That’s because we don’t belong here. I found a program for this night’s game. It’s September 2nd, 2006.”
September 2nd… why did that tickle my memory?
“Because that’s the night I first noticed you, when you made that amazing touchdown. That’s the night I knew you were mine.”
I sat down hard on the bench, my skin crawling, a shout lodging in my throat. For once I couldn’t come up with a clever quip. “Why? Why did she come here?”
There was a long silence as Kristair’s emotions rioted. “I suspect to kill you. It’s not sunset yet, and I had been late to the game. If you were dead before it started, I never would’ve known of you. Then when I became one of the Ascended I wouldn’t have had that link luring me back to you. I wouldn’t have left and the Ascended wouldn’t have split.”
“And she wins.”
I had been late for practice that day. Coach had reamed me out and almost pulled me from the game. I remembered that clearly because it was the last time I’d ever tried goofing off before a game. And the first game of the season. What an idiot I used to be. “Is she here? Do you know? We all got separated; maybe she’s in another time.”
“No, she’s here. I can sense her.” Kristair’s mind was alive with the hunt. “I should be able to find her.”
“I thought fucking with time was the ultimate no-no. Why haven’t the Ascended stepped in and jumped the bitch?”
“She hasn’t actually done anything yet. I don’t think they believe she will go that far.”
Before I could reply, the door banged open and another Jacob came running up to me, his head down, cursing under his breath. I leapt off the bench, my heart racing as my younger self stopped in front of me, his eyes widening as he saw my face. “What the fuck!” younger Jacob said.
“Son of a bitch.” There was no time to think. My hand balled into a fist, and I punched my younger self as hard as I could, wincing in sympathy as he went down in a crumpled heap. I dragged him up by his shirt and slugged him again for good measure.
Oh fuck, my heart wouldn’t stop racing. What the hell was I supposed to do now? “Kristair, umm, I uh, just knocked myself out. That’s not going to fuck with things is it? What should I do?”
“It’s a bit late to ask now. The deed is done.” I waited anxiously while Kristair thought. “Stash him somewhere and take his place.”
“What? How? Are you crazy? How’s that not changing things?”
“We don’t have much time. Nerissa is going to try to corner you when you’re alone. If your other self is safe somewhere else, she’ll have no reason to believe you’re not him. If she attacks you, you’ll have the upper hand. She’ll be expecting her victim to be clueless and an easy target. Not fighting back.”
The need to do something, anything, had me moving. I looked around for someplace I could hide myself, and my eyes fell on my locker. “Buddy, I’m so damn sorry, but it’s to keep your ass alive.” I dragged all my gear out of my locker, stuffed a sock in his mouth, and tied his hands with his jock strap. “Oh man, this is so wrong. I think I hate myself.”
“What’s happening?” Kristair demanded. “I’m getting closer to Nerissa.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll explain later.” Taking a deep breath, I stuffed the other Jacob into my locker. Oh god, this was fucking surreal. The next time I saw that bitch, I was going to whoop her ass, woman or not. I slammed the locker door shut and snapped the lock on. I couldn’t believe I was doing this. This had to be the craziest, most insane situation I had been in yet.
“This is the worst idea I’ve ever heard of,” I snarled as I stripped and started to yank on my old gear.
“Trust me, mo chroí.”
I finished getting dressed and tried to psych myself up to going out and joining my coach and the rest of my old teammates. How the hell was I going to pull it off? They’d figure me out in less than five minutes. And what if Nerissa started taking swipes at my old team just to get at me?
“Calm down, Jacob. They’ll see what they expect to see. It hasn’t been that many years. Your tattoos are covered up. Stop fussing so much and get out there before you change time even more. Right now only you have really been affected.”
I bit back the urge to snarl even more at my lover and grabbed my helmet, rising from the bench as I heard the door open again. “I’m coming, Coach.”
My heart flipped at the sound of a lock turning. “Um, Kristair, I think she’s here.” I heard the sound of someone coming down the aisle, and my hand drifted toward my gun under my clothes. “What should I do?” I couldn’t shoot her—that was Kayla’s body.
“Try to stall her, I’m almost there. I’d paused to investigate something odd.”
“This isn’t the time for curiosity! The door’s locked, but it’s cheap. You should be able to jimmy it or knock it down, okay? Just get your ass here.” Metal scraped against metal from the weight room, and I grabbed my gun and eased around the corner. I needed to put myself between Nerissa and the other Jacob.
Stalling wouldn’t work. Maybe if she hadn’t looked so creepy with her blank features, I could hit on her or something, but that wouldn’t be believable now. Then time ran out as Nerissa emerged from the weight room wielding a long weight bar.
Fuck pretending. I raised my gun and pointed it at her. “It’s over, Nerissa.”
Snarling, she swung at me, and I ducked out of the way, dodging around her as the bar clanged against a row of lockers. Son of a bitch, that didn’t help at all. “Where is he?” she hissed, swinging at me again.
“You’re never gonna find him.” I ducked again, cursing my decision to bring the gu
n. I couldn’t shoot her, and she knew it, but now I couldn’t drop it either and wrestle her, or she’d go for the gun. I’d handicapped my own dumb ass.
I couldn’t figure out why she didn’t jump through time again now that this attempt had failed, or why the Ascended still weren’t here. I dodged another blow, letting that one come closer as I tried to lure her farther away from my other self. I winced at the racket she was making, just waiting for Coach Latimer to come banging on the door to investigate.
“I’ll crack your skull in,” Nerissa rasped, this swing going directly toward my head with nowhere to dodge. “Then I’ll find him and do the same to his skull. Your brains will decorate this room.”
Cursing, I rolled out of way, scrambled to my feet, and ran. The doors to the locker room shuddered as something thudded against it. Another hard thud and they banged open. I spun around, raising my gun, and breathed in a sigh of relief as I saw Kristair. “’Bout time you got—”
A flash of metal out of the corner of my eye had me dodging awkwardly to the side. The glancing blow caught me on my shoulder, pain lacing through me, numbing my arm. The gun clattered to the floor. “Fucking a.” I dove for it, slamming into a row of lockers as Nerissa swung the bar over her head again. I braced for the strike I’d have no chance in hell of stopping.
Kristair snarled, staff whirling as he intercepted Nerissa’s swing. He shoved hard, pushing her back away from me, giving me the chance to find my feet again. “You okay?”
I rolled my shoulder, grimacing at the twinges. It would be sore, but I didn’t think anything was broken. “I’ll be fine.”
Kristair and Nerissa continued to spar, moving so quickly I didn’t dare try to intercept them. I glanced toward the door, which was listing off of one hinge. It was unnatural. Coach Latimer and the rest of the team were just down that hallway, getting ready for the game against Virginia, and no one had come to investigate. What the hell was going on?
I ran over to the door and shoved it back into the frame. The lock was busted wide open, not that it had done much to slow Kristair down anyway. I snapped the safety on the gun, shoved it in my pants, and dragged the weight bench over in front of the door. It screeched across the tiles, and still no one was coming to our rescue as I finished. I didn’t know whether to be relieved or offended.
Kristair and Nerissa were still battling, only now she seemed to be tiring. Her weapon was heavier than his, and each swing was a little wilder than the last. Kristair twisted his staff, and the metal bar went flying to the ground. Breathing hard, his face set, Kristair shoved her against the lockers, pressing the staff against her shoulders, and pinned her there.
“Nerissa, stop this madness,” he said harshly.
I reached out and touched him with a thought, wishing I could soothe him now. Underneath the implacable resolve was so much pain and fear. All because of this woman. I couldn’t begin to really understand what he was going through. As much as could read him, share his thoughts, I’d never had to go through a betrayal like this. She had been mother, teacher, and friend. She’d completely changed his life, and he’d lived with her for five hundred years. He’d pledged to her that he’d care for her descendents, and the promise had meant so much to him that when one had showed up on his doorstep fifteen hundred years later, looking for shelter, he’d taken her in and adopted Kayla as his daughter.
Even when I had thought Tony had betrayed me, it hadn’t run this deep.
Hadn’t Kristair meant anything to her in return?
I wanted to help him, but I felt like an intruder. This was between Nerissa and Kristair. Perhaps it had been a long time coming, and as much as I loved him, all I really could do was offer mental support and try to keep any other intruders off their backs.
“You’ll have to kill me, but you won’t. You just don’t want your precious Kayla to perish,” she snarled, pushing against the staff to no avail. What had happened to her strength and quickness? She seemed to be equal to the both of us now.
“I don’t want to lose either one of you,” Kristair said, his face bleak. “I’ve mourned you once, Nerissa. Don’t make me do it again.”
I sensed Kristair’s mind delve into Nerissa’s, and because I was still linked closely with him, I followed. He had done it earlier, but I had been too distracted with the Ascended to notice her mindset then.
Her thoughts were a storm of clawing terror, mindless rage because the world that she thought she had intricate control over, a world she relied on for her mental wellbeing, was falling apart. She was driven to try to fix it, and she threw her considerable will behind that goal. She was so fixated on Kristair being both the cause and the cure that she could not see past him.
Nerissa needed to control everything. That was something Kristair could never see. It was why she had chosen to create him as a vampire, because she had wanted to bend him to her will. That she had never entirely succeeded had always eaten at her deep inside. It had bugged her so much that I didn’t think she ever saw the respect or love Kristair had for her. What stupid senselessness.
“You mourned me?” Shock broke through the chaos.
“I kept my promise to you. What does that tell you?”
For a moment, I thought she’d relent, and then thoughts turned to stone. “That changes nothing, Kristair. I will see you kneel before me before I back down.”
“Is that what you really want?” Then, to my surprise, Kristair stepped back, and the staff turned back into the rod. Nerissa straightened, staring at him in disbelief as Kristair sank to his knees.
“Kristair, no.” Jealousy reared up at the sight of my proud lover humbling himself for her. Only I got to see him submit like that. Kristair only did that for me. I wanted to march over there and haul him up, and it shook me to my core.
I sought control with him too. Was I so different from her?
“Listen to me, Mistress. Our minds are joined, I cannot lie to you. At this moment, I cannot even hide anything from you. Will you listen?”
I tensed, and Nerissa did too. I stepped forward in case she decided to strike out. Kristair was so vulnerable. “Stay back, mo chroí.”
“I will hear you.” Suspicion colored her mind, and I watched helplessly as he took her hands in his. I struggled to control my own emotions, to keep them in check so as not to set her off further.
“My return won’t solve the problems the Ascended have. Only you can do that. Just as only you can heal the rift in time you created. It’s your thought and will that brought us here and only your thought and will can fix it.”
“What does that have to do with the Ascended?” she snapped, drawing her hands back. “All I hear are demands from you, Kristair.”
Kristair captured her hands again. He didn’t seek to cage her; I’d seen him hold Kayla like this when he told her something she didn’t want to hear. I knew his touch, strong and loving, and sensed how it calmed Nerissa without her even realizing it. There was a serene strength about Kristair that I had never fully appreciated.
Kristair’s emotions surged with regret and sorrow for Nerissa, and I didn’t understand it, after everything she’d done. Where was his anger? She deserved his hate.
“You’re the one who caused the rift.”
“Do not try to manipulate me,” Nerissa said. “I know you, child.” He held on tighter as she shook her head.
“You were angry when I left. You were furious that I managed to trick you, and you let it build up. Then, when some others decided that they wanted to go to other worlds and interact instead of just observe, you were terrified that they would follow me and you would lose them forever.”
“They broke the rules.”
“It’s not about the rules, Nerissa. It never was.” Kristair’s voice was so gentle, yet underneath it, I sensed the steel in him. He would make Nerissa see the truth, whether she wanted to or not.
“Strong emotion makes the Ascended uneasy. You know how you all reacted to Jacob. But he was an outsider and it was an
intrusion. You are a part of them and have been for a long time. Your anger infected the whole without any of you realizing it. When Tony’s people wanted to take their explorations a step further, you whipped the rest into a frenzy with your words and your anger. And the more they defied you and got angry in return, the worse it became.”
Nerissa shook her head wildly, hair whipping about her blank face, her emotions skewing about in a jumbled mess. “You lie! Stop twisting me about,” she shouted.
I realized what Kristair was doing. Nerissa could hold her own against anger, she could fight forever against Kristair’s obstinacy, but she had no defense when faced with him like this. I could understand. How many times had I backed down myself, lost an argument I wanted desperately to win because I knew he was only making that stand because he loved me?
Could I let go of my own anger and help him? All I really knew about Nerissa was that she had been my enemy long before she had turned against Kristair. She was the face behind the Ascended trying to keep us apart. But without her, I’d have had neither Kristair or Kayla. Maybe if I could just look at it like that.
Chapter 32
JACOB APPROACHED Nerissa and me, and I wished I could soothe his conflict, but I didn’t dare split my attention more fully between them. Nerissa was on the verge of cracking, and I had no idea which way she’d go. I stood up and wrapped my arm around her waist, easing her down on a bench as I sat down beside her. “I’m not lying, Nerissa. You know that.”
Jacob sat down on her other side, and I sensed the shock ripple through her as he touched her shoulder and let her see how troubled he was himself. “Let him finish,” Jacob said.
I took advantage of her distraction and sank further into her mind, striving to calm the chaos so she could see clearly. Jacob went with me, his mind a soothing murmur, and united, we replayed the confrontation with the Ascended, forcing her to see their reactions to her words and deeds.
“Yield, Nerissa. For the sake of the world you love. Only you can fix this. What will happen to the Ascended if you change time? Do you really want to risk everything for the sake of hurting me?”
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