Natasha and Maggie walked down the hallway
“What about that weirdo? That little, bald guy. He told me his name was Bob. He came to you too?” Natasha said.
“He told me his name was Tim.” Maggie shivered as she thought back to him. “He was plenty weird. I don’t know at all what he was getting at. But he seemed pretty happy with the reading I gave him.”
“Was he trying to talk to the dead?”
“No. Well, he did ask one question about his father, who had recently died.”
“What did he ask?”
“I can’t really tell you the details. You know. Ethics and all. I can tell you the response was more of a character study.”
“Maybe he just misses him. He wants me to contact someone. Maybe it’s dear old Dad.”
“Perhaps.” Maggie nodded. “Hey, want to go for a drink?”
“Sure.”
Once they settled in at a table at Intuition and ordered drinks, Maggie turned to Natasha.
“Do you mind if I call Weldon and tell him I’m going to be a bit late? We’re supposed to meet for drinks.”
“So go to him,” Natasha said. “Why the hell are you sitting here with me?”
“I want to know about Gus! I saw him at your booth,” Maggie said as she pulled out her cell phone. She text-messaged a note to Weldon.
“Oh…you did…” Natasha said, already almost forgetting he’d been there at all. “Yes, he did stop by for a bit.”
“Yes, I’m so curious I could burst,” Maggie said as she pressed Send.
“You know curiosity killed the cat,” Natasha said with a deadpan expression.
“But I want to know what happened.” Maggie leaned forward, grabbing Natasha’s arm. “Did he ask you out or what?”
“Why do you want to know so badly?”
“Because it’s so romantic!” Maggie’s phoned buzzed, and she checked the message from Weldon.
Natasha thought back to her last image of Gus’s massive form running from the hotel. The darkness of his emotions, the dying plants crumbling in the lobby. The haunted face of Pete and the other ghosts. It didn’t feel at all romantic to her. “Well, he came by to say hi, that’s all.”
“And? Jeez, Natasha, you have to stop being so coy.” Maggie pushed Natasha’s arm. “So, what happened? You guys gonna get jiggy, or what? Do you still like him? Huh?”
“I think we’re going to see each other again. He kind of wasn’t feeling well and left.”
“Oh. That sucks. Hope it was nothing you said,” Maggie joked.
Natasha sipped her wine. “You know, Maggie, I’m not very good with men. Sure, I’m great with the advice and all for others, but personally, I’m just not good with men.”
“Natasha, I’m sure you’re fine.”
“No. I’m not good at all. You see, I went for so long with no men. Just being single. Hanging with my girls. Doing my work, the circle. I feel pretty complete without a man in my life.”
“And now Gus has come in!” Maggie squealed. “You’re so lucky.”
Natasha put down her wineglass and stared sternly at Maggie. “It’s not that. It’s not that at all. There’s Craig.”
Maggie’s mouth hung open for a moment. “Get out!” she said in her best Elaine-from-Seinfeld impression.
“Yes, I like two guys.” Natasha hung her head. “I’m so confused. I don’t know what to do. I went from nothing to too much.”
“Oh.” Maggie nodded. “I see where this is going.”
“No, you don’t. You have no idea what’s going on. Now listen, here’s the thing. I met Gus New Year’s Eve. We fooled around a little but not a lot, you know? Then I had to hurry off, and we never traded numbers. He must have asked around about me because he knows where I live.”
“It’s not like no one knows who you are in Hermana,” Maggie said.
“I know that. But still, he took the effort to find me. He left me a bouquet of black roses on my birthday. He said he’s been by but I never answer the door.”
“Well, it’s true. You don’t. I’ve dropped by myself and can’t get you to open up that door until you’re done practicing or sleeping or whatever the hell it is you do all day long.”
Natasha nodded. “But, Maggie, I’m in a quandary. I’ve been jamming with Craig, and I really like him. He doesn’t have the animal magnetism Gus has, but we enjoy music. He’s a fantastic guitar player, and he doesn’t have such a huge ego that he’s impossible to jam with. Our music is so beautiful, a lovely give-and-take kind of thing.”
“So keep playing with Craig.”
“But now I’m sleeping with Craig.”
“No! Are you sleeping with Gus too?”
“I told you, I’ve barely even seen the guy at all. We made out New Year’s Eve, and since then there’s been nothing.”
“How’s Craig in bed?”
“He’s fantastic. God, it’s like we’re meant to be together. He plays me like he plays his guitar. It’s just that…”
“What?”
“Well, he’s a small, little man, and I like my guys big and strong, like Gus.”
“Then go for Gus.”
“But Craig is so attentive. I can’t jam with Gus.”
“Then go for Craig.”
“But I…I don’t know if I can be with Craig for long. I don’t know.”
“Well…what’s wrong with two guys?”
“I’m not a two-guy kind of girl, Maggie. Hell, I’m not even a one-guy kind of girl, I don’t think.”
“Nonsense. You can juggle a couple of men for a little while ’til you get to know them both a bit more.”
“It’s so stressful already and it’s just started.”
“Well, let’s think about this. What signs are they?”
Natasha laughed. “You’re never going to believe it. They’re both Gemini’s. How crazy is that? I can’t even pick one of them based on a sign!”
Maggie laughed and shook her head.
“Wow, you have your hands full. Well, why don’t you take your own advice? Open heart and open mind and see where it takes you.”
Natasha sighed. “Yes, open mind, open heart. I guess I’ll just see what happens next.”
Chapter Twelve
You may have some difficult decisions to make today.
Natasha Makes a Choice
Natasha woke to the wind howling outside her windows. Another snowy day in Hermana. She didn’t want to get out of bed. The chill in the room made her pull the covers up, and she debated whether she would go out at all. But then she remembered she was supposed to go see Craig’s band play that night with Maggie and Ellie.
She dragged herself up and over to the shower. She ignored the ghostly chatter around her as she lathered up with her scented soaps.
Craig.
Gus.
It was so weird to be attracted to two men at the same time.
She washed her hair and applied conditioner to it twice in the hope of drowning out any of her natural smells with the flowery aromas.
Once she was finished in the shower, she dried herself off and powdered her body from head to toe with floral-scented talcum.
She applied makeup to her face, staring at her dark eyes in the mirror. The wrinkles were starting to show again. Not only did she have her constant hunger to worry about, but she had to do something about her looks too. When her looks started to fade, she was pretty sure she didn’t smell so hot either.
She spritzed a large dose of perfume over her naked body and into her hair.
Another birthday come and gone. At least on this one, she was lucky enough to have a full moon and a circle. How often would a girl be lucky enough to have that happen?
The women were happy to use her birthday as an opportunity to redefine themselves and their love goals. She wondered if and how the new theory of combining Gwen’s charts and Ellie’s feng shui with a birthday would activate romantic love.
She had to make sure she had Ellie over sometime to
feng shui the rest of her home. Once her makeup was set and her clothes fastened and buckled, she went over to her computer. She checked her horoscope and saw that “changes were in the air.” The horoscope both amused and annoyed her.
Wasn’t there always some kind of change in the air?
She read through her emails, mostly junk, but as she was about to close them, one caught her eye.
She pulled it up and saw it was from Gus.
Hello, Natasha.
I’m sorry I had to run off the other day. I got your email from your business card at the booth. I hope you don’t mind. I would really like to see you again sometime. I promise I won’t run away.
Gus
Natasha smiled, reading and rereading the email as if she could find a hidden message snuggled among the words.
She imagined that him finding her email and taking the time to write was indication enough that he was still interested. She wondered why he didn’t phone her, but she imagined that maybe he was embarrassed about his sudden exit and he didn’t want to put her on the spot if he should call and she wanted nothing to do with him.
She typed and retyped, trying to find the words to send him. She wrote a rather long email but decided to erase it. She didn’t even know the guy, so why was she pouring out her heart and soul?
In the end, she eagerly wrote a succinct response.
Dear Gus
I would love to see you again. Name a date and let’s see what we can do.
Natasha
She sent the email and waited to see if it went through. Once she was satisfied it was merrily on its way, she shut down her computer.
A surge of happiness swelled through her. Whatever Gus’s problem had been, it had nothing to do with her. She had suspected that was the case, but now she knew.
A scratching sound outside her window startled her. She ran over to see what it was. When she looked out, all she could see was thick clumps of snow coming down. The sound had likely been the snow hitting the windowpane.
No matter. Between the ghosts, the weather and the energy of the town itself, something new and strange was always going on.
She hurried around the apartment, gathering up her purse and coat. With a sigh, she went out to greet the night.
Intuition was crowded, but Maggie and Ellie had found a table near the stage. Natasha was covered in snow when she sat down.
“Look, it’s the Abominable Natasha,” Maggie joked.
“Ha-ha. Very funny,” Natasha said as she pulled off her coat.
“Your guy is looking at you.” Ellie grinned. Natasha looked over at the stage, and Craig beamed at her as he strummed his guitar.
“It’s so fun to have a musician boyfriend,” Maggie said. “You can imagine that every song he plays is just for you.”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Natasha said. “We jammed together a couple of times.”
“Was it fun?” Ellie asked.
“It was lots of fun. But, quite frankly, I think I’m more attracted to Gus. “
“Really?” Maggie asked. “But you don’t even know where he lives. Or what he does.”
“I know he’s a writer. He lives in Hermana somewhere. He sent me an email today.”
Maggie sat forward excitedly. “What did it say?”
“It was just a simple request for a date,” Natasha said.
“And what did you say?” Ellie pressed.
“I accepted, of course. I just don’t know when.”
“Maybe he’s emailing you right now,” Ellie said.
“Maybe, but I’m here with you guys. I’m not sitting around the house waiting for some guy.”
The set was over, and Craig came over to the table. He kissed Natasha on the cheek.
“How’s it going, Natasha?” he asked.
“I’m doing great, thanks,” she replied. “And you?”
“I’m happy to see you.”
Natasha nodded. Maggie nudged Ellie.
“Let’s go out for a smoke,” Maggie said to Ellie.
“Sure thing.”
Maggie winked at Natasha as the ladies left. Craig scooted his chair closer.
“So, when do you want to get together again to jam?” he asked. “I do enjoy our sessions.”
Natasha took a deep breath. She even surprised herself when she spoke. “I’m sorry, Craig. But I’m going to have to stop seeing you.”
Craig frowned. “But why? Did I do something wrong?”
“Not at all,” Natasha said as she petted his hand. “You’re a great guy. A wonderful guy. And a fantastic musician. But I’m going to have to stop seeing you.”
“There’s someone else?” he asked.
“I don’t know,” Natasha said. “I’m kind of confused, and I don’t want to hurt you.”
Craig’s eyes were sad. “Is there anything I can do to change your mind?”
“I need to think. And I don’t want you waiting around for me.”
Craig sighed heavily and drank his beer. “It’s because you think I’m a flaky musician who can’t be stable, isn’t it?”
“No, it’s not. Believe me, this town is full of flakes.”
“So why can’t we hang out?”
“We just can’t. I’m sorry.”
Craig stared at her. He fidgeted for a moment and then stood up.
“All right, Natasha. I’ll respect your decision. But if you change your mind, even about jamming, just jamming, please let me know. We make beautiful music together.” He tried to smile, but it seemed false. He left her to return to his bandmates.
When Ellie and Maggie arrived, they were all smiles. “So?” Maggie asked.
“I broke up with him,” Natasha said.
“What?” Ellie asked. “You were just talking about how much you like him.”
Natasha looked sadly toward the stage. “I do like him. But I like Gus too. I can’t juggle two guys.”
“But he’s the real deal. He likes you a lot. You can see it in his eyes. And he’s here, and Gus isn’t,” Maggie said.
“I know. I can’t explain it. There’s just something about Gus that I need to explore. Maybe I won’t like him after all and I’ll regret hurting Craig. I don’t know,” Natasha said fretfully. “I have to get out of here.”
“Do you want us to come with you?” Maggie asked.
“No, I think I just want to be alone for now.”
Natasha put on her coat and glanced once more at Craig. He was busy tuning his guitar for the next set. She would miss his wiry, little body and his joie de vivre. But she was drawn to Gus’s darkness.
The snow had stopped falling, and Natasha wandered through the cobblestone streets, wondering if she had acted too quickly in cutting Craig loose. However, the more she walked, the more she was sure she had made the right decision.
She was hungry and hated it.
Why couldn’t her meals hold her appetite at bay longer?
Part of the reason she had broken up with Craig was that she didn’t know if she could stop herself with him. His blood made her mad with desire.
Each time they made love, she was closer to wanting to consume him. To drink of that lively musician blood and feel it coursing through her veins. She had already gone farther than she should have with him. Luckily at this point, he just thought she had a weird fetish, but if she one day went too far, he would be one more person to know her secret. She didn’t want to hurt him or kill him. He had too much to offer the world.
On the other hand, if he got to know her too well, he would wonder about her strange habits. How she stayed young. How she slept all day and wandered the streets all night.
In the distance, she heard a wolf howling. The sound was mournful and soared through her body.. She ached as the wolf howled again. A howl and a little yelp. A cry. Like grief. Like the world was a dark, hollow void of emptiness. She felt like the wolf sounded. Alone and sad.
After a few minutes, there was another strange sound in the air. A low, humming noise tickled her se
nses. She wasn’t sure if she was hearing it or feeling it. It was almost like the steady vibration of a motorboat approaching the docks, but the sound wasn’t coming from the water. Besides, who would be foolish enough to take a boat out in a January snowstorm?
She stopped walking and grew more curious about the humming sound. She hadn’t recalled hearing it before last month. She had been walking the streets, the beach and the forests of Hermana for decades. She was familiar with most of the noises of the night. This noise was new, and it piqued her curiosity.
However, it was becoming apparent that the sound was happening more frequently on her late night sojourns through the town.
She was determined to figure out where it was coming from. She closed her eyes, turned around and walked until she determined the source must be in the woods. Maybe it was some kind of generator. Maybe there was a new home in the woods or some kind of work being done. It was far too cold and blowy to go traipsing through the woods that night, but she was determined to get to the bottom of it soon.
It was likely no big mystery, but so little amused her these days.
Her bones ached from the cold, and her face felt like a wooden slat of splinters. Between the grueling weather and her decaying body, she wanted to lie down on the beach and have the icy, cold fingers of the ocean pull her out to sea.
Instead, she needed to do what she could to right herself in her own little world. Her aches and pains could and would be dealt with, even though she never truly enjoyed what she had become.
She continued until she passed by a warehouse where there was loud music. Dozens of teenagers and young people spilled out into the streets, smoking cigarettes and laughing. She decided to see what was going on. By the brightly colored clothes of the partiers, she knew it was a rave.
Young people went to raves.
She needed to be around young people.
Her senses tingled and twitched as the youthful energy slammed into her, taking hold in her body. An urgency surged through her and she knew she was in the right place. The scent was here, and she would follow it until she found what she needed.
She paid the $10 cover charge and went inside. Kids jumping around to techno music packed the dance floor. Their glowing, sweaty bodies were bumping and grinding. Fashion was a garish combination of fluorescent greens and oranges in polka dots and plaids. The black lights on the dance floor added a heightened unreality to pallor of the skin, and eyes glowed weirdly, as if she had wandered onto another planet. She noted with interest that most of the dancers were girls in skimpy clothes. Many of the girls wore ponytails or short, spiked hair. The boys had both long and short hair, with a few multicolored Mohawks towering above the rest.
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