by Brooks, Anna
“Why don’t you go back to sleep?” I suggest.
She opens her mouth to argue but quickly covers it with her hand and rushes to the bathroom.
“Damn,” I mutter under my breath. Just as she makes it to the toilet I reach her to gather her hair and rub her back until she’s done.
“You okay?”
She nods and stands then leans over the sink for a second to catch her breath. Once her breathing has evened out, she brushes her teeth. When she’s done, I lift her and set her back down on the bed. Before I cover her up, I lift her damp shirt off and replace it with another.
As soon as I shut the light off, I crawl in behind her and pull her close. I don’t even have time to register how wonderful it feels to be holding her again because I fall asleep, for the first time in years, not worried about my girl.
* * *
The muffled voices on the TV wake me up, and I open my eyes to find Mary mouthing the words. Staying still, I just watch her. The corners of her lips tip up in a small smile and her green eyes sparkle as they follow the characters on the screen. This is one of the things I’ve missed the most—a carefree Mary. Her smile has always been so vibrant, and I’m glad to see it again. She laughs at something and covers her mouth, then gasps when she realized I’m staring at her.
“Morning,” I say and lean up to kiss her cheek.
“Morning.”
“Did you sleep well?”
“After I puked, I slept great.” She shrugs her shoulders. “Feel fine, too. I took some Tylenol about an hour ago. Thanks, by the way.”
“No problem. I’m glad you feel all right.” I sit up and pull her to my side, hating the fact that she’s only a foot away but not in my arms. Her body fits next to mine like she was made to be there.
“Brandon. I—”
“Shh.” I place my finger over her mouth. I know what she’s going to say, a bunch of apologies and explanations about her behavior last night. No point in talking about it because it’s over and done. We have bigger issues to tackle than a drunken night. “It’s okay. I get it. Hell, look at what I did yesterday. We’re both dealing, babe.”
Her eyes don’t leave mine as she crawls over me and settles on my dick that’s happily regained its perma-hard title whenever she’s in sight. We both let out a groan. She locks her fingers behind my head and leans down, her lips hovering over mine. “I’m ready to remember every second, Brandon.”
Her tongue darts out and slides over my bottom lip before she gently places her lips over mine. I reach up and put my hands under her shirt, gripping her sides so she doesn’t move. I’m so on edge and the heat alone coming from between her legs is enough to make me come in my boxers.
We both open our mouths at the same time, and like it was rehearsed, we make out. Just like we used to. Slow for a minute then a fight for control until one of us gives in. Gentle strokes of our tongues followed by bites and nips. I lift her shirt over her head and she reaches back and takes off her bra then settles so we’re skin to skin.
Her hard nipples poke into my chest, and I grab her hips and press her down. “God you feel so good here,” I mumble between kisses.
I push her back a little and lean forward to kiss her breasts. Licking under her tits on the sensitive skin, I smile against her nipples when she pushes them into my mouth. Her hips rock back and forth, and I swallow a groan when she circles them.
She pushes me back so I’m against the wall and starts licking down my chest. Her nails follow the same path, and I push her hair from her face so I can see. I want to watch everything she does. Memorize every second of it.
When her fingers reach my dick, she palms it from the outside and I raise my hips up enough for her to pull the black cotton down my legs. Her hands grip me at the base and slowly pump up and down. A bead of pre-cum leaks out of the tip and she looks up at me with hungry eyes and licks her lips. “Can I?” Her voice is nervous, but her hand confident as it continues to jack me.
“Fuck yeah, Mary. Wrap those lips around my cock.”
She licks the tip, and my eyes roll to the back my head while my fist tightens around her hair. Releasing her hand, she flicks my balls with her tongue, then slides it all the way up to the swollen head. I decide to let her lead, let her take her time, even though it’s fucking killing me not to fuck her mouth hard and fast.
Without warning, she sucks me in, and my hips jerk off the bed. She pulls out with a pop and sucks me back in, again and again.
“Your mouth feels damn good, baby. Fuck,” I hiss when she increases her pace.
She hums around me, the vibration adding to the intensity. Her fingers cup and pinch at my balls and they draw up close to my stomach.
“I’m gonna come, baby. Shit, keep suckin’ me like that.”
The seal she has around me gets tighter and I grab her head with both hands to thrust up into her hot mouth twice before I come down her throat. I collapse onto my back, spent from the best blowjob of my life. My head rings with the pleasure.
The ringing stops then starts again, and Mary’s voice breaks through the fog.
“Your phone.” She taps me on the chest with it, and I pull her down and kiss her.
My cell rings again, and I curse at the interruption. “Sorry. It’s probably work.” Glancing at the time before I answer, I realize a case must have popped up because it’s not even six thirty yet.
“It’s okay.” She smiles.
“That was amazing.”
She lowers her head and whispers, “Thank you.”
I press accept and pout like a girl internally when my boss tells me that I need to get downtown for a case. Fuck, I don’t want to leave her yet. In fact, I could stay here all day . . . every day with her.
“Dammit. I’ve gotta go.”
Mary climbs under the sheets while I get dressed and use the bathroom. I’ve still gotta run home to change and feed Kat, so I move as quickly as I can.
When I’m ready to go, I sit on the edge of the bed next to her and press my lips to her forehead. “I promise I’ll make it up to you. It kills me to leave you like this.” I trace her flushed cheeks and pointed nipples. “But I have to go. I’ll be back later tonight, okay?”
“Yeah, sure.” Her voice is breathless and I pull the sheet down to rest my head between her breasts.
Her fit body is begging me to touch it, arching into me, hot with desire.
“Fuck,” I mutter, then pull her legs out so she’s on her back.
“What are you doing?” she gasps. When she tries to sit up, I place a hand on her stomach and push her back down.
“I can’t leave you like this. How wet are you from sucking my dick?” In one swoop, I discard her pants and underwear and run my fingers through her folds. “You’re soaked. Goddamn, that’s hot.”
I circle her opening with one finger before plunging it in. Her walls are already so fucking tight, but I add another finger and begin to fuck her hard and fast. She pants and moans, and I lean down to suck her clit into my mouth. A mewl escapes her lips, and her face displays how badly she needed this. Eyes squeezed shut, fists grabbing the sheets, chest heaving with every breath. “I love eatin’ your pussy, baby, could do it all fucking day.” I suck again, and her walls clamp down. But she’s still not there yet. “You taste so fuckin’ good. You’re like my own personal dessert bar.”
She arches into my hand, and I swirl my tongue on her throbbing nub a few more times, “Come for me, Mary. Come all over me.” With one final swirl of my tongue and a gentle nip on her clit, she tightens and screams my name.
I let her come down and kiss up her body until I reach her mouth. She kisses me back, but regrettably, I have to pull away.
“I’ll be back, okay?”
“Yeah,” she sighs.
I wash my hands quickly and give her a kiss as she lies completely lax. “Bye, babe.”
“Bye. Be careful.” Her hands frame my face, and she kisses my cheek. I absorb every ounce of what she’s giving me
right now—her sweetness, her trust—because the road ahead of us is going to be bumpy. We’ve gotta have these moments to remember when things get tough.
“Brandon?” she asks as I’m about to close the door.
“Hmm?”
“You know I love you, right? I never stopped.”
My eyes slowly close, and I press my lips together. “I never stopped either. Never will.”
The drive home is relatively fast, and I’m in such a hurry, I run in and toss my keys on the kitchen counter. Kat rubs her body between my legs, and I scratch behind her ears a couple of times before going to my bathroom. A noise catches my attention, and instincts have me reaching for my gun, but I stop when Kelsey’s voice calls out from my couch.
“Kels? What the fuck?”
She stands up, looking tired with disheveled long brown hair. “Hey,” she says with a yawn.
“What are you doing?”
“I, uh. I came over to feed Kat.”
My radar is going off like crazy, and I cross my arms. “One, her food is in the kitchen. Two, I told you I didn’t need you to come over this morning.”
Her eyes dart all over, fingers twisting as she bites her lip. “I forgot. Sorry.”
“Kelsey,” I snap. “Why are you here?”
“She wasn’t in the kitchen when I got here so I went looking for her and sat down.”
I squint my eyes at her and tilt my head. She’s gained some confidence because she’s looking right at me with her hands now on her hips and an eyebrow raised like I’m inconveniencing her.
“Well, she’s in the kitchen now. If you wanna feed her on your way out that would be great. I’m running late.”
“You’ve gotta go back already?”
“What do you mean?”
“To work. You just got home and you’ve gotta leave already. Don’t they know you need some sleep?”
“Oh. No. I was at Mary’s last night. I’m just here to change quickly.”
Her eyes widen for a second, but she quickly looks down and skirts past me. “I’ll just feed the cat on my way out. Have a good day.”
“Thanks.”
I don’t even have time right now to figure out what in the hell is going on with Kelsey. But something is definitely not right, and I will get to the bottom of it.
Chapter 12
Mary
About four months have gone by with Brandon back in my life. I’d like to say it’s been easy but reconnecting with the only man I’ve loved after twelve years is anything but. He’s stayed over about half the time but has been pretty busy with work, so when he does come over, it’s usually late. When he’s here we jog together in the morning before he has to leave, and I go about my days as normal. Cleaning, laundry, and more cleaning. I’m not sure I even want more than that . . . I don’t know if I could handle it.
Elizabeth has stopped by a couple of times with lunch, and I’ve really enjoyed talking to her again. She doesn’t bring up the past, and I’m so appreciative of that.
Brandon, on the other hand, is driving me crazy. Bringing me Chinese all the time to fatten me up because I’m too skinny. That’s really not an inconvenience; I love me some Chinese food. We haven’t had sex yet; he always stops before it goes too far. Says he wants our first time to be in his bed and not a motel room. And since I’m freaking out about sleeping somewhere other than the only place I’ve known for the past twelve years, it hasn’t happened yet. It’s stupid, I know. He’s not pushy per se, but his constant insistence that I quit my job and move in with him is driving me nuts. I did compromise and quit my Sunday jobs because I have some money saved and so we could spend time together since he works so much during the week and on Saturdays. For everything else, I tell him I'm not ready… I tell him I’m not ready, that I need more time, but the reality is . . . I’m scared.
This motel is all I know. Cleaning the rooms of strangers is my life. I’ve gotten so good at staying invisible that I can’t figure out how to move on from that. Anything I’ve done outside of Pay-By-Day has been discreet. Going shopping at odd hours, using a fake name to get my birth control pills through the local free clinic, driving a car registered to someone else—all of that has made me almost agoraphobic. Sure, I leave my room sometimes, but it’s planned. Everything I do has a purpose. The fear of someone I used to know or Scott Smith seeing me has left me paranoid. Even though he’s in jail. Brandon insists I’m safe, that nobody is looking for me for any kind of revenge. But I can’t escape the clenching in my gut at the thoughts of leaving this place.
I haven’t been a total recluse, though. Brandon has taken me out for dinner a couple of times, and I went with Char and her cousin, Meara, to get our nails done for Charlotte’s wedding. The best part of the reception was that Meara’s boyfriend, Liam, is in a band, and they played at the wedding. It was so much fun to listen to live music.
I’ve made a friend in Charlotte. My only stipulation to her is that we don’t talk about my past. She has been wonderful and not pushed. She understands not wanting the past to rule your life. It’s nice to have someone closer to my age to talk to. I went to her and Travis’ engagement party and wedding with Brandon. I was scared shitless, constantly looking around for something or someone, but Brandon’s presence managed to calm me enough that I had a great time.
Steve and Elizabeth treat me just like they used to, like I’m part of the family, and it warms my heart to know they truly don’t hold any grudges.
It’s late Friday night and, not surprisingly, I’m in the laundry room folding towels. I wipe the sweat from my forehead and make a beeline for my room as soon as I’m done.
“Mary!” Betty calls.
My shoulders slump and I slowly turn to acknowledge her at the front desk. I’m so tired. Physically, my routine hasn’t changed, but mentally, all the shit I’ve been dealing with is taking a toll on me. I don’t sleep well unless Brandon is with me, and when he’s not, I toss and turn all night kicking myself in the ass that I’m too much of a baby to move in with him.
The way I feel when we’re together is like I did in high school. Safe, happy, loved. I’m the one holding us back. And I hate myself for it.
“What’s up?”
“I need you to take some towels to room twenty-four.”
My face crunches when I run over my mental list of occupied rooms. “There isn’t anyone in twenty-four.”
“There wasn’t. They checked in when you were doing laundry.”
“Aren’t there enough damn towels in there?”
“Apparently not.”
“Fine.”
I go back to the laundry room to grab some towels and stomp all the way to the room.
My hands are full, so I yell, “Room service. I have your towels.” I’m not really room service but what else am I supposed to say?
The door swings open and Brandon stands before me dressed in jeans and a black t-shirt. His hair freshly clipped and scruffy face trimmed.
I freeze. “What are you doing?”
He motions inside, and when I take in what he’s done, the towels fall from my hands. Candlelight glows in the room and rose petals cover the bed. A sweet smell of Chinese food wafts through the air, and the small table is dressed with a tablecloth and plates of food.
“What?” I ask, too stunned to say more.
The slight smirk on his face is fucking adorable, and he motions with his head for me to enter. My feet skid along the carpet and he puts a hand on my lower back to give me a push inside.
“I hope you’re hungry. I made a lot.”
“Umm, yeah. What’s going on?” He pulls out my chair for me and places a napkin on my lap and a kiss on my forehead then sits across from me. His body is far too large to be cramped in the small chair.
“Nothing’s going on; I just wanted to do something nice for you. And since you’ve been a little nervous about going out at night, I figure this is the next best thing. Besides, it’s my grandma’s homemade chop suey recipe. I know
how much you like it.”
“I do like it.” I like it so much; it’s by far my favorite recipe of all time.
“Here.” He fills my plate, and I don’t hesitate before I dig in.
When the flavors hit my tongue, I groan in appreciation. “This is good. You made it?”
“Yeah. I did.”
“Brandon, this is so sweet. Thank you.”
His answering smile fills my heart and breaks it at the same time. We eat in companionable silence and I open my mouth to thank him again when something soft and furry jumps into my lap.
“Oh, my God. What the hell?”
“Kat. Get down.” Brandon laughs and leans over to pick up the cat and set it on the floor. It jumps back up on my lap and I wave him off when he tries to grab it again.
“Is this yours?”
“She is.” He nods. “I found her the day after I moved in.”
“She’s adorable.” I scratch under her chin and she purrs in my lap. Her fluffy white hair is so soft. “What kind of cat is she?”
“Kelsey said she’s a ragdoll.”
My head snaps up involuntarily before I look down at the cat curled in a little ball on my lap. “That’s your neighbor?”
“Yes. My neighbor.”
“Oh.”
“Mary, look at me.”
I really hate sometimes that he sees through me. My insecurities, my doubts. It’s more than jealousy. It’s an insurmountable fear he’ll realize that he wasted all this time looking for me, and now that he’s found me, the thrill of the chase is gone . . . and he will be, too.
This time my head raises slow, and he leans closer to me. “You don’t have anything to worry about. You never did. Nobody could ever compare to you. Nobody ever has.”
“I’m not—”
“It’s always been you. Always. Even when I didn’t know if I’d ever see you again, you were the only woman who consumed every fiber of my being. The only one I ever loved. And the single person who has the ability to tear me apart. But you’re also the reason I’m finally doing more than just existing. So get it out of your head that you have competition ‘cause, babe, you’re incomparable.”
