by Nathan Roden
He held up the two pieces of paper.
His eyes sparkled and a grin grew across his face.
“Would either of you gentlemen consider a career inside the FBI?”
Tom and Babe looked back and forth at each other, stunned. They could only manage one word apiece, that sounded sounding something like “Wuuu?”
“I received this memo yesterday,” Jack said.
“And I quote, ‘The Washington D.C. office of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, in conjunction with the office of the Director, hereby announces the creation of a new department known as Personnel Evaluation Technologies’ End-quote. The Director has authorized me to offer—” Jack chuckled.
“The Director has encouraged me to twist your arms to persuade you to accept the two newly created positions of Evaluation Technology Manager; training new and existing staff to utilize the methods begun by Research Technologies Incorporated. Most of the training will be done right here in Boston, with some occasional travel. What do you think?” Jack asked.
“What about Jordan?” Tom asked.
“And Millie?” Babe asked.
“Jordan is once again a member of the FBI. He’ll be staying in Washington, of course. He will be establishing a mirror organization there, beginning with the hiring of two or three young psychologists.”
“And Millie?” Babe asked again.
Jack looked at his watch.
“MG should be talking to Millie right about now. MG wants to go back to her design company and work with Rebecca. She needs to train her replacement. That will be Millie, if she agrees. And I know someone that would like to interest Miss Gerard in some traveling,“ Jack said.
“What kind of travel do workaholics do, Jack?” Babe asked.
“I have every intention of making, and then drinking, a toast to my career from a beach in the Bahamas, as my New Year’s resolution. Hopefully, this will occur just a few days after my retirement party,” Jack said.
“One more thing. The Director is referring to this new department as his ‘pet’ project. Personnel Evaluation Technologies? PET? It wouldn’t hurt to laugh when he says that. You know—like you get it.”
”Aw, man. We get to butt kiss like that? I can’t wait,” Tom said.
“Me, either,” Babe said. “But we’re going to have to help this Director Guy spice up his material.”
“Pull gently, boys,” Jack said. “The twenty first century is still a new thing for some of us, you know.”
Tom and Babe had lunch on Jack, who was thrilled to be able to put the tab on his expense account.
“We’ve reserved the banquet hall at Grill 23 for Friday night—all MG’s idea, and a good one it is,” Jack said.
“The three of you coming to work for the Bureau demands a celebration.”
“So MG said Millie is taking the job?” Babe asked.
“Yes. She said it was a ‘No-Brainer’. MG and I will pick up anyone that wants a ride on Friday. She’s volunteered to be designated driver,” Jack said.
“It’s like we can’t be trusted, Babe,” Tom said.
“I know. My feelings are so hurt that I’m probably going to have to get hammered,” Babe said.
Tom and Babe arrived back at their office to what was becoming a familiar sight, that being Millie bouncing on her toes. They went with the flow, and soon the three of them were bouncing around the reception area as Millie sang, “We’re going to The Show. We’re going to The Show.”
Babe asked MG to take him shopping for a new suit on Thursday. Jack came along. Babe made a joke about needing a haircut, and they ended up at Esteban’s salon where Babe received an expert cut from The Man himself. Esteban looked sideways at MG.
“Girl, what is different about you?”
He rubbed his chin and looked her in the eye. Then he looked at Jack. And back at MG. His eyes grew wide.
“Oh, my Lord. Miss MG and Mister Jack. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. You go on with your bad self, now, Mister Jack.”
He kissed Jack on both cheeks and literally smothered MG. While this was happening, Jack whispered to Babe.
“Have you been able to get in touch with Athas yet? The Director asked about him again this morning.”
“I really don’t know what to say. I think he’s gone,” Babe said.
“What do you mean, gone? The Academy is buzzing like a hornet’s nest waiting to get their hands on him and the President wants to see to him. What in God’s green earth are you talking about, gone? He can’t be gone.”
“Jack, we’ll get together as soon as possible, and I’ll tell you what I know. But you won’t like it. I don’t like it. And I’m not sure you’ll believe what I tell you. But I promise you one thing, Jack. I’ll never keep a secret from you.”
Jack put his arm around Babe’s shoulder as they watched Esteban assault MG in a way that few people would be able to get away with.
“That’s all I need to hear, son.”
Babe was about to open the door for Millie into the Grill 23 dining room when a barrel chested young man wearing a pig-tailed ear-piece beat him to it.
“Good evening Mr. Babelton. Miss Vandermeer. And congratulations,” the young man said.
“Thank you,” they said, looking at each other with puzzled expressions.
MG waved them over. Chad Henson, Marshall and Janine Gates, as well as Marshall’s parents, Donald and Billie, came in moments later.
None of them were sure exactly why they were there, but they had been invited by the FBI, and they didn’t know what to do other than show up.
Donald, Billie, and Janine looked on in amazement as a line of strange people hugged and kissed Marshall and his friend Chad. Janine looked at her in-laws and shrugged, shaking her head and moving her lips without saying anything.
They grew even more alarmed when this same group of people—some of whom were weeping a little—began hugging and kissing them.
Billie Gates looked toward her husband, who was completely perplexed. Donald Gates stood uncomfortably next to a weeping, thin, and very animated young black man with an enormous pompadour. The man also appeared to be wearing lipstick.
Babe hugged Klaus and Frieda Schroeder, and Lewis and Leo as well. There was hugging everywhere—some of it by people that knew each other.
Babe was watching the remainder of this procession with great amusement when a pair of nice smelling hands covered his eyes from behind.
“Hey, I would know those hands anywhere. Hulk Hogan, right?” he asked.
“She has really long nails, Babe. You sure you want to go there?” MG asked.
“I know your perfume, Millie. What’s up?”
“I’m going to turn you around. Try not to fall down, Bozo,” Millie said.
When Millie removed her hands, Babe was looking into the smiling faces of his parents.
“Surprise!” they shouted.
“Joshua. We’re so happy for you. The FBI. Oh, my,” Amanda Richmond said, taking her son’s face in her hands. She kissed him on the lips.
Robbie waited patiently for his turn. He hugged Babe tighter than he ever had and whispered into his ear.
“I’ve always been proud of you son, and certainly no less, today.” Stepping back, he said, “Wow, where did this come from?”
Babe laughed.
“Long story. I’ll have to check and see how much I’m allowed to tell. This is so great—you two being here. How did you—?”
“Jack,” they both said.
“Thank you for coming. I know that sounds like a line. But I’m really, really glad you came,” Babe said.
“Uh, Rick isn’t—”
“No, baby,” Amanda said.
“He isn’t—he’s not…”
“His sister is staying with him for a couple of days, Josh,” Robbie said.
Amanda pursed her lips, her eyes moist. She nodded.
Babe hugged them both at the same time.
No one let go for a while.
Jack tapped a spoo
n to his glass from behind the one row of raised tables.
“Ladies and gentlemen, if you please—let’s all take seats. If your name is on one of the tables on the riser, please sit there. Otherwise, make yourselves comfortable anywhere. If there are any complaints, please see one of the large gentlemen by the doors—the ones with the extremely powerful weapons.”
The crowd laughed.
Jack and MG sat at the center of the raised table flanked by Babe, Tom, Millie, Christie, Amanda and Robbie, Jordan and Samantha, and Rebecca and her new boyfriend, the cabinet man with the Popeye forearms.
Jack stood as the last of the guests were seated.
“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for coming. I know this was arranged on fairly short notice and I appreciate each and every one of you making the effort to be here tonight.
“As some of you know and others will blissfully not know, the Boston office of the FBI has recently been through some very trying times. It’s the very nature of the job that we all signed on for, but we are only human. We witness suffering, and we suffer as well.
“But quitting is never an option. So we count on each other. In the midst of pain we build relationships that are based on trust, loyalty, a common goal, and love.
“Ladies and gentlemen, please join me in welcoming Jordan Blackledge back home to the FBI, and—please hold your applause for a moment—three more friends who are not new to our lives but are new members of the FBI family: Joshua Babelton, Thomas Reardon, and Millicent Vandermeer.”
The four new FBI members stood. They waved and blushed at the standing ovation. The man who had earlier opened the door for Babe and Millie crossed the room and whispered in Jack’s ear. Jack motioned for everyone to be seated.
“It seems that I’m not completely in charge this evening. If you would please stand, I would like to introduce the Director of the Federal Bureau of investigation and his good friend, The President of The United States.”
A murmur spread through the small crowd as the first of the Secret Service entourage entered the room. Everyone craned their necks looking toward the doors, although some looked back toward the other side of the room when they heard someone exclaim, “No fucking way.”
Babe and Millie would tease Tom mercilessly for a long time over that faux pas.
Robbie Babelton fanned Amanda with his napkin. She looked like she might faint.
Billie Gates reached past her husband, and past Janine She stood on tiptoe to grab her son by his ear, pulling him down to her eye level.
“You will not go straight home tonight, young man. You bring your big self to your momma’s house, because you have some explaining to do.”
“OW. Yes, ma’am,” Marshall said, wincing.
“Oh, baby. You better listen to your momma, Barry,” Janine said in a low, husky voice.
The Director and the President shook several hands on their way to the riser, where they greeted each person at the table. The Director attempted to defer to the President and sought out a chair. The President took him by the arm and the two men stood together between Jack and Babe. The President spoke.
“Good people of Boston, we do not intend to interrupt your celebration. But, John,” he motioned toward the Director, “and I go back a long way. We would like to join you in welcoming these bright, young people into our fold. They have been working behind the scenes helping us to evaluate our new recruits. And though some details remain to be revealed, this group has proven instrumental in a recent Agency matter of the utmost importance. This made John look good, and since I appointed him, they’ve made me look pretty good, as well.
“ Jordan, Millie, Joshua, and Tom—I salute you, and welcome.”
After more applause, the Director added his kind words to the President’s sentiments. The two men shook hands with all present before leaving to return to Washington.
When they had gone and the murmuring died down, Jack tapped his glass again.
“Now I feel like the singer for the local band that goes on after the Beatles,” Jack said.
The crowd laughed.
Someone yelled, “Do Free Bird!”
“It gives me great pleasure to inform you that Christie and Tom Reardon are not only merely pregnant, they are really, most sincerely, pregnant.”
Tom and Christie stood and waved to the applauding crowd. Christie pushed Tom down into his chair. She continued to stand, took a bow, and waved some more as the people laughed and cheered her on.
Jack turned to Babe.
“Babe, would you give me a hand, please?”
Babe stood, and when Jack held out his left hand, Babe took it. Jack’s hand was damp and trembled slightly, making Babe more than a little bit nervous.
Jack tried to lean his cane against the table. It started to slide to the floor until Jordan caught it. Jack held his other hand out toward MG.
“Madeline?”
MG looked up at Jack and as Jack pulled gently, MG stood beside him.
Babe felt the weight increase on his hand He brought his other hand up to assist as Jack slowly lowered himself on his injured leg— down to one knee.
What greater honor is there for a man, than to be someone, for somebody?
Jack let go of MG’s hand and reached into his jacket pocket. He took out a ring box, and in a well-rehearsed and smooth movement, he flipped it open with his thumb and held it in front of MG.
“Madeline Eva Gerard,” Jack said, with an ever so slight quiver in his voice.
“I am hopelessly and madly in love with you. Will you marry me?”
Babe was broadsided by an emotional avalanche—from what he was watching and from the surge of electricity that was flowing through his hands.
He knew that he was about to cry, and when he caught sight of Jordan losing it, he did as well.
The crowd was a mixture of gasps, whimpers, and muted squeals, as a tear slid down MG’s cheek.
She put a hand to Jack’s cheek.
“I love you, Jack Englemann. Of course I’ll marry you. Now, get up here and kiss me.”
And the crowd goes wild.
When Jack regained everyone’s attention he announced,
“In keeping with Bureau tradition, we’re wrapping up here but we’re also not done yet. All those interested may reconvene with us at Momma’s Sofa where some of us will no doubt help close that establishment tonight. For those in need, we will have volunteer designated drivers positioned at these doors as you leave. Please make arrangements with them before you leave.
“I understand that Christie Reardon will be making her debut in this capacity—a fact that she is none too happy about.”
MG tugged at Jack’s sleeve. Lewis and Leo Schroeder approached their table carrying a gift wrapped box.
“Before we go, Babe, Lewis and Leo have something for you.”
“From the whole Schroeder family, Mr. Babe,” Lewis said. “And Mr. Englemann, of course.”
Lewis and Leo Schroeder handed Babe the box.
He lifted off the top, and from the box he pulled out an FBI K-9 service jacket.
Babe looked at Lewis and Leo.
“Your family is our family, Babe. Just on special occasions, though, huh?”
To greater applause, Babe said, “You got it, guys. Thanks a million.”
Amanda Richmond hugged her son again, her mascara a mess.
“I am so happy for you, Joshua. I hope you will be able to visit again soon. I have to get back to Chicago.”
”Of course, Mom. Thanks again for being here. Really,” Babe said.
“Come on, Amanda,” Robbie pleaded. “You don’t have to run off yet. This is Josh’s night. Stay a few more hours and I’ll make sure you get to the airport in the morning. You’ll be home before dinner time tomorrow. What do you say?”
“Well, “Amanda said, ”I don’t guess it really makes a rat’s ass, does it?”
She winked at Babe.
“I suppose I can nurse a Long Island for a while.”
“Uh oh,” Babe said. “You had to go there, didn’t you? Get her, boys.”
“Madam,” Leo said, standing next to Lewis and placing a hand on his shoulder. ”You’ll not find that foreign concoction on the menu of our fine drinking establishment.”
“Indeed, madam,” Lewis continued, “but do we have the perfect drink for you.”
Mr. Pendleton did not disappoint. He strutted in his new FBI jacket, and when MG lowered the rear window, he immediately stuck his head outside on his very first ever car ride.
A team of volunteers at Momma’s Sofa pushed several tables together to house the party. Lewis got the attention of one of his bartenders.
“Roland! VIPs here,” Lewis said, drawing an invisible boundary around the group with his index fingers.
Roland gave his Boss a thumbs-up, and turned to his fellow four bartenders.
”Heads up. VIPs in the house. Keep ‘em full.”
Amanda Richmond just thought she was nursing her Boston Harbor Iced Tea. Babe noticed that when Amanda’s attention was diverted elsewhere, Robbie was using his glass to refill hers. Babe made his way to his father’s side.
“I see what you’re doing,” Babe said.
“So?” Robbie said.
“So, you’re going to get caught. Signal me when you need a distraction.”
“God, I’ve always loved a good conspiracy,” Robbie said.
The number of toasts being offered went a long way toward keeping Amanda from ever catching on. And while Robbie was using his glass as a pitcher, the Momma’s staff was keeping his glass full, so he was getting just as plastered as his ex-wife.
A seemingly never-ending round of toasts went out to Jordan, Babe, Millie, Tom, Christie, Jack, and MG. After these dried up, the toasts began for Mr. Pendleton: First Dog to party at Momma’s Sofa. Best Dog to party at Momma’s Sofa. Person with the most legs to ever party at Momma’s Sofa.
