by Samah
Only a few people knew Kanika but a unanimous hi sounded. She had met most of them the night before. Priya watched the show through the filter of her sunglasses. She noted Kanika’s attire. She was wearing a light-blue wrap-around skirt that the wind pushed up to reveal her legs every now and then. A black vest hugged her upper body tightly. She had the waist of a young girl and the bust of a grown woman. Her arms were muscular. Priya’s eyes shifted from Kanika to Chirag. He was standing in the pool, water up to his waist, talking to Akhil.
Karan stood up to welcome his guest. Priya saw Chirag see Kanika. They hadn’t met the night before. She saw him put his empty beer bottle on the edge of the pool and excuse himself. She saw him climb out of the water, his wet trunks clinging to his legs. He had shaved his chest. He never did that. It was a new thing.
Chirag felt Priya’s eyes on him but didn’t look at her.
Priya’s pulse quickened. She watched their meeting play out like the audience of a cricket match, waiting for the last decisive ball.
Karan was asking Kanika what he could get her to drink. Sakshi joined them a few seconds later. Chirag had walked to the other side and picked up a fresh pint of beer from the crate. As he used his teeth to uncap it, Priya made a disapproving sound. Tch tch. He took a small sip.
She looked at Kanika again, trying to determine the brand of her black sunglasses. They made her look wealthy.
Priya counted the thirteen steps Chirag took to reach Kanika. Sweat patches had formed on her T-shirt.
They greeted each other politely—Chirag and Kanika. No hug, no handshake. Just two tentative smiles. Nothing too awkward. Kanika spoke confidently; Chirag looked attractive. Priya was surprised he still had it in him to look attractive. She had opened her mental notepad. She was waiting for him to make one wrong move—an unnecessary laugh, a slight touch on the shoulder, any small gesture of familiarity. But Chirag gave her nothing. She wondered if he would introduce them. He would be in more trouble if he didn’t.
She felt foolish sitting all by herself, like an unpopular child at a school party. When she got nothing to make her case stronger, she decided she had witnessed enough of their show. It was time to go and take a nap. She would join everyone again in the evening.
She was about to sit up when she heard Chirag call out her name.
28
She got up unsteadily. Chirag had beckoned her to where they stood. Walking towards them, she regretted not blow-drying her hair. She stood beside Chirag and smiled warmly at Kanika.
‘This is my wife, Priya,’ he told her. ‘Priya, this is Kanika.’ He placed his hand on the side of Priya’s hip. The gesture surprised her and made her want to laugh.
They didn’t need the introduction, of course. They knew each other even though they had never met before. The past and the present said hello. Courtesy pushed insecurity aside for a moment.
‘It’s so good to see you,’ Kanika said.
‘You too,’ Priya replied.
Chirag too suppressed an urgent need to laugh.
Priya propped her sunglasses on her head. Eye contact was protocol even if you were talking to the enemy. On taking a closer look, she found Kanika all the more attractive—a broad forehead, thick eyebrows, a slender nose, full lips and a pointed chin. There was something about the way she was—casual, distant. The way she had greeted Chirag made Priya feel they had not been in touch. She didn’t look interested in her husband. But the problem was not Kanika’s interest in Chirag, it was Chirag’s interest in Kanika.
Much to Priya’s relief, Sakshi joined their conversation. Priya felt Chirag’s hand inch higher up her waist, pulling her slightly closer to him. She turned to him with a pointed look—a smile that masked anger. He looked back at her wryly, pulling her even closer, challenging her to break away. She felt her seriousness leaving her. She stood confused at the spot where personal matters intersected with protocol. Whatever happened in their bedroom had no place outside of it. There was a sense of relief, a brief sense of togetherness in this pretence. But if he thinks I’ll just forget about it then he’s in for a surprise.
They stepped back from the conversation between Kanika and Sakshi. Suddenly, someone yanked Chirag’s right arm towards the pool, causing his beer to spill a little. Karan laughed with the others as he wrestled his targets into the pool. Two more people attacked them. Chirag mouthed a few expletives, shaking his head playfully.
‘No, no no no no. Please. No,’ Priya said as she was dragged away.
Someone took Chirag’s beer. He stumbled a little, pulling Priya along with him to the edge of the pool; they both lost their balance and fell into the water. It all happened in a matter of seconds. Bobbing back up, Priya shot everyone a murderous look. ‘Get Sakshi too!’ she said, and before she knew it everyone was being thrown into the pool one by one.
‘You okay?’ Chirag asked her, wiping his face.
‘Yeah,’ she said and swam to the other side where Sakshi, Sheetal and Niharika had just been thrown in. Karan wisely left out Kanika. There were better ways to commit suicide.
‘I need to use the washroom,’ Kanika said and left, sparing everyone the awkwardness. It would have been rude if Karan had forced everyone except her into the pool.
Grown-up men behaved like little children, making a huge racket and throwing people in the water. Priya laughed along at the chase and the horror. She saw Chirag frowning at her from the other side. The sun was in her face. He mouthed something but she didn’t understand.
‘What?’ she said from across the pool with a matching hand gesture.
Chirag swam over to her and she moved slightly away from her friends and heaved herself up on the ledge. ‘Get out of the pool, Priya,’ he said softly.
Priya didn’t understand what he meant. ‘Why?’
He sighed. ‘Have you brought your costume?’
‘No, I didn’t carry it.’
‘Okay then get out,’ he said gesturing to Priya’s clothes with his eyes, imploring her to read between the lines. Suddenly Priya realized her borderline nakedness even though she was fully clothed. Her white T-shirt was not appropriate pool wear. She sprang up, grabbed a towel from a plastic chair and went to her room for a bath.
29
Priya stood under the shower and squeezed out some shampoo. She was still hot with embarrassment because of her wardrobe malfunction downstairs. Pushing the thought aside, she rubbed the liquid into her scalp.
When she came out of the bathroom, Chirag was changing out of his swimming trunks. Hastily, Priya shut the door and Chirag covered himself with a towel.
She squeezed her eyes shut behind the door. Outside, he did the same. ‘Shit,’ he muttered. Such accidents never happened at home.
‘Sorry,’ she said and instantly felt like an outsider in her own marriage.
Chirag eased up. It’s not as if she’s never seen me naked before.
‘It’s okay,’ he said, now dressed.
Priya had not taken a fresh set of clothes into the bathroom. Wrapped in a king-sized towel, she tiptoed to her bag to fish out her clothes and then turned to the bathroom again.
‘It’s okay. You can have the room. I’m going for a bath anyway,’ Chirag said, trying his best not to look at Priya. She sat on the bed and waited for him to go inside.
She checked for any obvious creases. The red dress passed the test. Slipping into it, she used the free towel to wrap her head.
When Chirag emerged from the bathroom, fifteen minutes later, he found Priya standing in front of the mirror wearing a dress he had never seen before. It looked good on her. He was pleasantly surprised. The growl of the hairdryer was the only sound that interrupted their silence. Priya bent her head down and waved the dryer at the back of her neck. Then she threw her head back, her hair like that of a movie star. She picked out some things from a golden pouch.
‘Just . . . give . . . me . . . a minute,’ she said, facing the mirror as she carefully applied a thick coat of bright-red lipstick.
Chirag saw her mouth form an O as she concentrated on applying mascara. He used to find this very fascinating.
‘Why are you smiling?’ Priya asked, suddenly feeling like laughing herself.
‘Nothing,’ Chirag said.
She saw him fold his arms in the mirror. She quickly zipped up the pouch and picked up her heels.
‘All yours,’ she said and walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her.
Outside, she couldn’t help but let out a quiet laugh. She couldn’t understand what was going on in her mind and her marriage any more. She walked over to the staircase and sat on the first step. She wore her black heels and stayed there for a few minutes. Then she went downstairs.
30
By 7.30 p.m. most guests had gathered in the living room and were ready to start the night. Priya was getting a picture clicked with Niharika and Sakshi when Chirag walked down in a pair of jeans and a black shirt. We stop talking and suddenly he decides to become handsome?
Some new people, mainly Karan’s colleagues, had arrived for the night’s celebrations. Karan and Chirag joined the conversation at the bar. Priya noticed Kanika talking animatedly on the phone. She hadn’t changed out of her blue skirt.
Karan handed Priya a glass of white wine. She hesitated at first. He cut off her mild protests. ‘I’m not taking no for an answer.’
She laughed and took the glass. She took a small sip. It tasted bitter. ‘I think you have another guest,’ she said, gesturing towards the main door.
Before anyone could react, Kanika walked over to the entrance and embraced the man standing at the door. She ushered him into the house as if she were the host. No explanation was needed to know he was her husband. Kanika escorted Neil to where they stood. She introduced him to Karan and Sakshi.
‘Guys, this is my husband, Neil,’ she said. ‘And this is Karan, his wife, Sakshi. It’s their anniversary. That’s Niharika, Shweta, Akhil, Chirag and his wife, Priya.’
Chirag and his wife, Priya. Priya liked the sound of it. Especially from Kanika’s mouth.
Ceremoniously, Neil shook everyone’s hand. He wished Karan and Sakshi and thanked them for the invitation.
‘So how often do you come to India?’ someone asked. ‘Where are you originally from?’ someone else asked.
Neil’s accent, his choice of words, made it clear that the only thing Indian about him was his looks. He had a deep voice and a thick beard. Priya thought he was classy.
As the evening progressed, the party got noisier. After finishing her drink rather quickly, Priya went to the bar and placed her empty glass on the counter. She stood there and watched the party for a minute. The overhead lights had been switched off. Only the lamps in the corners glowed.
Chirag was on his second drink, smoking the occasional cigarette in the lawn outside. He had given up the habit after Aryan was born but sometimes liked to be reminded of how it felt.
‘Can I get you something?’ Neil asked Priya.
She was caught off guard. She hadn’t noticed him walk up to the bar.
‘Oh,’ she said and smiled. ‘No, thank you.’ Then she changed her mind. ‘Actually I’ll have another glass of wine.’ She looked at Shivram and gestured him to refill her glass.
Neil asked him for more whiskey and ice. His Hindi was appalling. Priya told him this and they both laughed.
Chirag came back to the living room and found his ex-girlfriend’s husband laughing with his wife. He saw him lean towards her to be able to talk over the music. He saw her laugh in response. He saw Neil pick up the two refilled glasses from the counter and hand one to her. He saw him clink his glass against hers. A ‘cheers’ sounded. Then he saw him leave.
Priya was walking towards the dining table when Chirag accosted her, tugging at her hand, startling her. She looked at him questioningly.
‘Not one drink with me in nine years and suddenly you’re getting drunk with unknown men. Well done!’ he said.
Priya frowned. Chirag was in no position to make accusations. She shrugged his hand off and walked away.
He got himself another drink.
A scintillating discussion about a recent Bollywood release was taking place at the dining table. One woman said it was worth the watch only because of Salman’s abs. The other thought the song with Kareena was a better reason. Priya tuned out of it. Her mind kept going back to what had just happened. She had been standing at the bar. Neil saw her alone and made courteous small talk. What was so wrong in that? She sipped her wine, amused at Chirag’s jealousy. Sakshi pushed a plate of kebabs towards her. Priya took one and kept it on a tissue. She couldn’t eat. She looked at Kanika, sitting with Neil on the sofa. He was saying something to her, using his hands animatedly. They seemed happy. She thought of the previous night. Chirag had not been even interested in meeting Kanika. He had gone to sleep after their fight. What if she had misunderstood the situation? But then she remembered the message, Karan’s message on Chirag’s phone. And Chirag had accepted it too. But what had he accepted?
* * *
A little before midnight, Akhil went around the whole room with a tray of shots. Again. The party had moved to the middle of the room. Everyone was standing in small groups, talking over the music as their feet moved to it. He started with Karan and Sakshi, the crowd cheering him as he forced them to drink. Then he made his way to every guest of the party, Shivram assisting him diligently, armed with a bottle of tequila, not looking at anyone directly. Many of Akhil’s targets shied away at first. But he got his way. When he approached Priya, Chirag was standing nearby; Neil and Kanika next to her.
‘I can’t. I can’t,’ she said, putting her hand to her mouth.
‘Come on, Priya,’ Akhil said, ready with a shot glass in hand.
‘Come on, Priya,’ Neil said, and took Akhil’s hand towards her mouth.
She conceded. She knew Chirag was watching. She gulped one shot. And then another.
Chirag walked up to her. ‘Priya?’
She ignored him. He took her by the arm and led her across the room, to a quiet corner.
So finally he wants to talk . . .
‘What do you think you’re doing?’ he said.
She shrugged. Her throat burned.
‘Really . . . how old are you? You think this is going to make me jealous?’ he said.
‘Well, clearly it’s working. Can’t say you’re much older than me.’
‘So you are doing it on purpose?’
Priya folded her arms, pursed her lips and looked away. Chirag sighed. For about ten seconds they stood in silence, weighing their words, evaluating the situation. Then she turned to leave.
‘Wait, Priya . . . stop running,’ Chirag said, pulling her by the arm.
‘Oh! I’m running? Wow! Some audacity you have, Chirag,’ Priya said. ‘If there’s anyone who’s been running away from the situation, it’s you, and you damn well know it.’
‘Calm down, Priya. People can hear you.’
‘See. There you go. Running away.’
‘I’m not running away. You really want to do this? Now?’
‘Um . . . yeah! Don’t you think it’s high time?’ she said, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.
‘Fine! Come. Let’s finish this discussion once and for all. Do you want to have the show here or should we spare our marriage the public humiliation?’
His words stung her but she didn’t retort. She needed to gather her wits for this conversation. Searching her mental notepad for the notes she had made over the last few days, she marched towards the staircase and Chirag followed her. They avoided eye contact with anyone else.
Priya walked up the stairs noisily, the clink of her heels a fitting prelude.
Once they were in the room, Chirag shut the door and locked it. Then he turned to Priya. She was standing in front of the bed, arms crossed, fuming.
31
‘So tell me. I know you’ve waited all day to have this conversation. We’re here now. Please start,�
� Chirag said.
Priya was surprised at his confidence. It made her nervous. She was quiet, thinking what to say.
‘Come on, Priya. I thought you would have at least a hundred things to accuse me of.’
‘There are just so many things . . . I don’t know where to begin.’
‘I’ll help you. Let’s start by what’s been bothering you the most. Here’s a hint. Her name is Kanika,’ Chirag said.
Priya was stunned. ‘Thanks for the help. Let’s start by you telling me what the fuck is going on?’
‘Watch your tongue, Priya.’
‘Good way to dodge the question.’
‘It’s not. Trust me, I can do better.’
‘Answer me.’
‘Since you’ve been spying on me so well, why don’t you answer the question yourself?’
‘See. Again. No answer. You’re just confirming my doubts. You wanted to come here to meet Kanika, right? To have an affair.’
‘Okay, Priya. I would need a few more drinks to start hallucinating.’
‘Actually, you go right ahead and have those drinks. This conversation is going nowhere. We’ll talk when you’re ready to accept things,’ she said, feeling a pronounced throbbing in her head.
She walked to the door in order to leave but Chirag intercepted her. He took a deep breath.
‘Wait, Priya,’ he said, holding her by the shoulders. ‘I’m sorry. Let’s calm down and talk this out properly. I know I owe you some answers, but Priya, there are things that you need to own up to as well. I know this whole anniversary party started this, but even you know that everything hasn’t been okay between us for a while now.’
Suddenly, as soon as Chirag uttered these words, Priya felt something. She darted towards the bed, taking him completely by surprise. She yanked Chirag’s towel off the bed and held it. As soon as he realized what was happening, he rushed to her and held her by the waist. He hadn’t seen her like this before, and he instantly knew it was the alcohol. He watched with a helpless, blank expression, as she started throwing up.
