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no one knew where we were. For a long tune there was no phone. Come along, I want to show it to you."
"WTiy today, Sallie?"
"Because I wanted to be able to come here one last time. I wanted to be the one to show it to you. I didn't want to tell you about it or have you read it on a piece of paper. I'm . . . going to die soon, Fanny. Very soon."
"Take that back, Sallie," Fanny said, too loudly.
"Now look what you've done, you've scared the birds out of the trees. Darling Fanny, I can't take it back, it's true. I can't wait. I know you don't understand, but..."
"What do you mean, you can't wait?"
"It's time for me to go, Fanny. Mama and Cotton and Devon, they're waiting for me. It's been too long. Devin and I had many talks over the years about what we would do if something happened to either of us. I knew Devin couldn't Hve without me. He knew I wouldn't walk away from my resfX)nsibility in regard to Philip. I tried, and you see what a mess I made. Devin did what he had to do, just as I did."
"You were kiUing yourself taking care of Philip. You should have let the trained professionals do it. You didn't do this to yourself, Philip did it to you. Philip was fine two years after his stroke. You coddled him for another year and a half. Bess told me that. The doctors said he wouldn't walk again. Philip walked. Those same medical marvels said his speech would be defective. Philip talks almost as well as you and I. He fooled us all, and by doing so he shackled you to him, and you allowed it because you felt guilty."
"He made me atone for Devin. I paid the price, Fanny. I've paid in ftill. Now tell me, is it true what you said about dieting before a face-lift?"
"Yes," Fanny said.
"How long do you think it will take me to lose thirty pounds?"
"Twenty years. I don't want to talk about this, Sallie."
"I'm serious."
"Six months, maybe longer."
"I don't have six months. I need your help, Fanny."
"I can't talk about this. People don't get a face-lift when diey're . . . they're . . ."
"Dying? How do you know they don't? I'll eat lettuce and carrots and take lots and lots of vitamins. I should be able to drop the weight in two months. A week later, I'll get the face-lift. That leaves
me three weeks. The doctors could be wrong, I might have longer. Philip is the hdng proof that they can make mistakes. Of course I might not be able to ... be up and about, but that's okay, a face-lift can heal in bed."
"Shut up, Sallie. You're making me crazy. How can you be so goddamn matter-of-fact?"
"Because I've lived with this for a long time. I didn't want to burden amyone."
'*What do you think family is all about, SaUie? Not for just the good times, the bad too. I could have. . . been there to listen, if nothing else. I would have come to the cottage more, but I thought you didn't want me there. Every single night I cried for you, and every single night I said a prayer for you. It was all I could do."
SaUie sat down in the weeds. "I love you like a daughter, Fanny. Will you help me?"
"Of course I'll help you. Did you think I wouldn't even for a minute?"
"No. We need a plan."
"We need more than a plan. What's wrong -with you, SaUie?"
"Everything. What kind of plan? A face-hft takes fifteen years off my life. I saw that on television. I should look just the way I did when Devin .. . when Devin saw me the last time. Think about how remarkable that is, Fanny."
Fanny sat up in the tall grass and hugged her knees. "I miss you already. What will I do without you?" Tears dripped fi-om her eyes.
'*You'D come to your senses, get a divorce, and marry Simon. You should have done that fourteen years ago. The nice thing about fam-iUes, Fanny, is, you live on through your children. You'll see me in Simon every day of your life. The best of me is in Simon. I don't know how that happened, but it did. That's my legacy to you, that and this house in the cottonwoods. It hurts me to see you cry for me. Come on now, I said I wanted to show you the house. Then we'll make plans for my diet and the face-lift. Oh, you have to cancel the party. There's no time for a party. Phihp didn't want one anyway. I already called half the guest list and canceled. You'll have to do the rest or have Sunny and Billie do it"
"You're telling me this now, at the eleventh hour? Sallie, it's too late."
"No, it isn't. It's never too late. Simon always does things at the eleventh hour. Phihp has gone into kidney failure. He won't last the week. God must not think I'm such a bad person after all. He's going
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to take Philip first, so he won't be a burden to anyone after I'm gone. It's amazing how things work out."
Fanny followed Sallie through the waist-high grass in a daze as she tried to comprehend everything Sallie had just said.
"What do you think? Isn't it wonderful?" They stood in front of the house together, arm in arm. "Let's go inside. It's quite charming. Devin made some of the wooden tables."
"Why don't we come back another day. I'll .. . I'll keep the tables, I won't change anything. I give you my promise, Sallie." Fanny hung back. Somehow, she couldn't bear the thought of going inside.
"You're right, we need to get back. I want to check on Philip. I need to caU Ash and Simon. What will you do with the cottage after we're both gone?"
Fanny jerked open the door of the car. "Do?"
"I'd like you to bum it down."
"Bum it down. You want me to bum it down?" Fanny said, a stupid look on her face.
"Yes."
This wasn't happening. She was dreaming. This was a nightmare and she was going to wake ciny second. "All right."
"Make it look like an accident. Don't claim it on the insurance. I wish I could tell you how much I hate that cottage. Make sure the wind is right or you'll bum down the mountain."
Oh, God. Oh, God. Fanny nodded.
"When I go, Fanny, I want you to dig up Devin and mix our ashes. You might need help doing that. Sunny or BiUie Coleman can help you. No one else."
F2mny lowered her head to the steering wheel. She cried as she'd never cried in her life.
"I guess you're sorry you suggested this outing," Sallie said. Fanny's head bobbed up and down. "Is it too much for you to handle, Fanny? I've always believed that God never gives a person more than they can handle."
"No, no, I can handle it. I don't want you to die, Sallie. I'm selfish—I want you to live forever. I don't know how to handle death. I don't know where Billie got the strength to go on after her mother, her husband, and her only son died. A mother isn't supposed to bury a child. I don't think I have that kind of strength, SaUie. I'll fall apart and you'll.. . you'll be up there saying you screwed up by picking me to ... to bum your house down and . . . and ... all that other stuff."
"I know strength and character when I see it, and I saw it in you the minute I met you. Simply put, dear Fanny, there is no one else I would trust. We need to get back on the road, dear."
Hell yes, they needed to get back on the highway. Fanny's tires squealed as she barreled out to the road, her foot heavy on the accelerator. All she wanted was to get back to her Htde studio, lock the door, and crawl into one of the big red chairs.
Fanny brought the car to a full stop in front of Sallie's cottage. "Would you like me to come in, SaUie? Is there anything I can do?"
Sallie's voice was cheerful. "Not a thing, Fanny. Here's the list of names for you to call to cancel the party. I put a check next to the ones I called. I'll come over to the studio early this evening, and we can work on my plan. Will that be all right?"
"Of course. You don't have to ask, Sallie. Can we stop being so polite to one another?"
Sallie walked around to the driver's side of the car. She leaned in and hugged Fanny. "You are the dearest, sweetest person walking this earth. I would do anything to see you happy. I see the shadows in your eyes, and that bothers me. You deserve happiness, and it makes me sad that I won't Hve to see you truly happy.
We need to work on that before I go. I'll see you later."
Fanny bolted to the studio, her hands trembling so badly she could barely shoot the dead bolt. She ran to the oversize red chairs, curled herself into a tight ball, and cried, her shoulders shaking with grief. A long time later, exhausted with all the crying she'd done that day, she reached for the phone. Her voice was barely recognizable as her own, raspy and hoarse. "Mr. Tinsdale, please. This is Fanny Thornton." When the attorney's voice came over the wire, Fanny squared her shoulders. "Mr. Tinsdale, file my divorce papers. I know it's been fourteen years since you drew them up. I'm ready now. It's very important to me that they be filed today. No, I will not change my mind. I appreciate your patience with me. Yes, I'll give your regards to Sallie. Good-bye."
Fanny's next call was to John Noble. When his comforting voice came over the wire, Fanny felt so relieved her tense body relaxed immediately. "John, I need to talk with you about something very important. I just want you to listen . . . and when I'm finished, tell me if. . . if it can be done."
Ten minutes later, Fanny cleared her throat. "I know I can handle it, but what will it do to Sallie?"
"Fanny, I have always been of the opinion that when a person is
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nearing the end of their life, their wishes should be taken into account. Sallie is a very- strong-willed woman. If she wants a face-lift, let her get a face-lift, but she should get it now. If she wants to diet, let her diet. She's going to do it any-way if she's as determined as you say she is. Do you want me to get in touch with a plastic surgeon I know and make the arrangements?"
"Yes. Call me when you know the date and the time. There is Philip to ... to consider."
"Yes," John said, "there is Philip to consider."
Philip Thornton was laid to rest on a clear sunny day. Only the immediate family and the employees of the R & R Ranch were in attendance.
"When I die I want you 10 play Dusty Springfield's rendition of 'If You Don't Love Me,' " Sallie whispered to Fanny. "Promise me?" Fanny nodded.
As a buffet lunch was being served, Ash drew Fanny aside. "So you're really going through with the divorce." It wasn't a question, but a statement. "Fine."
"I didn't think you'd mind. I feel compelled to say I didn't think you'd show up today."
"Jesus, Fanny, that's pretty low even coming from you. WTiy wouldn't I show up, he's my . . . was my father?"
"Where were you in the early years when he had to be fed and diapered? You ran then. I don't think he ever forgave you. Ash."
"This is not the time to pick a fight, Fanny. What's done is done. We'll see if he forgave me when it's time to read the will."
"Philip's will is one paragraph after all the legal stuff that goes before the bequests. He left everything to Sallie and a small bequest to each of the kids. That's it Ash."
Ash stared at Fanny in stupefied amazement. "He wouldn't do that. What about Simon? Who gets R & R?"
"R & R goes to Red Ruby. I think it was hers all along. The chicken business is . . . was . , . Sallie's. Philip got a salary and a bonus. That's the way Philip wanted it. I thought you knew all that."
"Well, I didn't. What's that mean, I'm out in the cold?"
"You need to discuss business with your mother. Things may have changed over the years. Sallie has never confided in me with regard to her business or her finances. I know you think she has, but she
hasn't. Excuse me, Ash, I want to say good-bye to Red and the others."
Ash found Simon in the cemetery, sitting on a low stone waU under the cottonwoods. He hung back when he heard Simon's low voice. When there was a break in the monologue, Ash called out. "Simon?"
"Here, Ash. I'm talking to Pop, saying all the things I wanted to say for over forty years. It's not that I didn't try over the years, I did, but he didn't want... he didn't like confrontations. I spoke with him a week or so before he slipped into his coma. I was looking for some small measure of comfort. Needless to say, I didn't get it. Ash, have you taken a good look at Mom?"
"Yeah," Ash said, sitting down on the wall next to his brother. "I tried talking to her about a month ago. I wanted her to give me the go-ahead to build that casino and hotel I talked to you about. She stared at me like I was an alien from another planet. I realize now she probably knew Dad didn't have long to live. Fanny told me Dad left everything to Mom and a few small bequests to the kids."
"I didn't know that. I wasn't expecting to inherit anything. Were you, Ash? Guess so, you were Pop's golden-haired boy."
"Yeah, I was. I want to build that casino."
"Do you need money?"
"Megadollars. Fanny filed for divorce. She's finally going to go through with it."
"It might be best for both of you. You don't want to end up like Mom and Dad, do you?"
"Fanny has this family thing. I wish I could be . . . I'm not what she needs. To be honest, I don't know what she wants. I believe in my gut that Mom warped her mind along the way just the way they both warped us."
"Jesus, Ash, that's a terrible thing to say."
"Have you ever seen anyone more like Mom? I swear, Fanny patterned her life after her. She denies it of course. She even looks like her. That's a crazy fluke, I know, but there it is."
"Ash, about Mom ... I talked to John Noble this morning. He wouldn't tell me anything specific. It was what he didn't say that scared me. He as much as confirmed that she's . . . terminally ill. I think we should both go to him and make him tell us . . . whatever it is he's keeping from us."
"Simon, we just buried Dad. I don't think I want. . . hell, I know
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I don't want to know if Mom is that ill. I don't think I could handle knowing. Can you?" He puffed furiously on his cigarette, the smoke making his eyes water.
"You always need to be prepared," Simon said quietly.
'*You can't prepare for something like that."
"Don't you want to make peace with her?" Simon asked.
"Like you did with Dad?"
"I tried. You need to try, Ash. If you don't, that means you're going to have one more demon riding on your shoulders."
"I got a whole flock of them now. What difference does one more make?"
"Okay. I'm going to stay on for a while. What are you going to do?"
"Go back to the ranch. Dad had some things on the drawing board we didn't get to ... we didn't get around to when his kidneys started to go. What's your opinion of packaged frozen chicken dinners?"
"Speaking as a single guy, great. Single women would prdbably love it. Hell, married people with kids might love it too. Did you test-market the idea?"
"Yeah. We got great percentages. However, that was five years ago. If we had gone ahead and done it, then we'd be at the head of the pack. Now we have competitors."
"Thornton chicken is right up there. You should be able to crack the market. I'd do it."
"I think I will. You know, Simon, in my wildest dreams I never thought I'd be running a chicken business. Hell, I never thought I'd have four kids and be divorced, either. Who ever would have thought Moss Coleman and his son would die? You just don't know what life holds. I have some good years left, and I intend to live them. What about you?"
"I take things one day at a time. I like to deal with the problem, solve it, and go on so it doesn't hang over my head. I've got a good life, it's comfortable, I have my own house, money in the bank. I have good friends and my brother. My best friend Jerry has nine kids. I'm godfather to four of them. Good old Jerry. Most of the time he's in a fog. How the hell do you put nine kids through college?"
Ash grinned. "You wait for godfather Simon to make an offer. You paid for the four, right?"
"You know me, I threw in two others. They're good kids. I'd rather do something like that than piss the money away."
"Was it your idea to have Sunny's Togs buy the Silver Dollar for its corporate headquarters?"
"No. Actually, it was Sage's idea."
&nbs
p; "Well, I gotta get back, Simon. If you're staying on, give me a call and maybe we can do the town." Simon nodded. "Are you going to .. . stay here in the cemetery?"
"Yeah, for a litde while. I still have some things I need to say."
"You aren't going to get any answers," Ash said, clapping his brother on the back.
"I'm not looking for answers. Ash. I think I'm trying to be a good son after the fact."
"Forget it, little brother. Death isn't going to make a difference."
"To me it does," Simon said quiedy. "See you around. Ash."
As per Sallie's instructions, she'd been spirited into the medical center after dark, her surgery scheduled at five in the morning. She spent five hours in the recovery unit and then was transferred to Sunrise. An intern was to stay with her until the surgeon removed the sutures from the eye area and the pressure bandage wrapped around her head.
"I want to know how we're to keep this little . . . sojourn from Simon," Fanny said, settling Sallie in after driving her home. "Oh, God, Sallie, I cannot believe you did this to yourself Do you hurt?"
"Not at all." Sallie spoke with her teeth clamped together. "Tell him I'm in a cranky mood and don't want visitors."
"He's not going to believe me. He already knows something is wrong. He's staying on, that was the first clue. I see him sitting on the steps, staring at your cottage. I also saw him talking, very intendy, I might add, with John Noble the day Philip was buried."
"How bad do I look, Fanny?"
"You're swollen and you're black-and-blue. Simon is going to start to quiz me."
"Su Li brought herbs up last week. I've got everything ready. Poultices, Fanny. I'll be able to wear makeup and wash my hair in four days. I want you to come for lunch tomorrow, I have things I want to discuss v^dth you. Do you have the time?"
"I'll make the time. Nothing on my calendar is more important than you."
"Not even Simon?"
Fanny smiled. "Not even Simon. I'll be there at noon."
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Outside in the bright sunshine, Fanny looked around. Everything looked the same, the sun was shining, the clouds were as pretty as they were yesterday, the grass just as green, the flowers as brilliant and fragrant Overhead the same birds chirped and chittered among themselves. Yet everything was different. Her shoulders started to slump as she climbed behind the wheel. She wanted to cry.
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