by Lauren Dane
“Just when I think I’m getting you figured out, you go and prove me wrong. Do you ever, you know, think about having a child of your own someday?”
“I’m getting older. I come from some fucked-up stock. My family was enough. What kind of person would I be to do that to a kid?”
“I had a child and my mother . . . well, you’ve met her.”
“Your mother loves you. She’s a hard-case bitch with her nose a little too high in the air, don’t get me wrong. But I can guarantee she never left you alone for ten minutes, much less dropped you off at the corner convenience store and didn’t come back for nearly two years.”
He blinked at her.
“I’m sorry. I . . . It’s like telling you stuff has loosened my tongue.”
He took her hand, his fingers tangling with hers. “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you’re sharing with me. I can’t get past that initial moment of rage when I hear how you were treated when you were at your most vulnerable.”
“So I come from a bunch of assholes. There are already a lot of assholes who had kids and fucked them up. I’m not sure I can overcome my DNA to not do the same. I mean, can you imagine me at a PTA meeting?”
He grinned. “I totally can.” He shrugged. “I’ve seen you when you talk about Alexander. I know you love him, and from what I understand, he loves you right back. Seems to me what your situation was had a lot more to do with how they acted, not their biology. Hell, Charlotte, my ex-wife, her parents were really involved when she and her siblings grew up. And she’s a terrible mother. It’s not always biology, Raven. Some people are just, as you so eloquently put it, assholes.”
“Anyway, I don’t know. I have a studio apartment and I like to travel. Having a baby isn’t in the cards for me.”
But he could see her holding a baby. Their baby. He didn’t say that out loud, not wanting to scare her away and also needing to process, yet again, how fast this was all moving. He wasn’t impulsive. He was the type of man who took forever just to decide what to order off a menu. But the way he felt for Raven was apparently outside all the rules in his life. The way he felt for her simply was. He knew it as sure as he knew gravity existed and that he had to pay his taxes.
“Do you . . .” She shook her head and went back to eating.
“What?”
“Never mind.”
“No way, you don’t get to do that. Do I what?”
“Do you want to go with me? To this Halloween thing tonight?”
It was the first time she’d done the asking, and he liked it.
“Yeah. I’d like that. I want to get to know your friends better. I’m sure Daisy and Levi will be there. I know Daisy and Gillian are close. She’s got pictures of Poppy and Miles all over her and Levi’s house.”
“Okay then. I need to go home for a while. I really need to exercise. I’ve done nothing but eat too much and drink a lot of beer since you came along. My clothes are going to get tight.”
“Want to go kayaking with me and my brother Eli?”
Warily she considered that. “I don’t know.”
“He’ll like you. I told him about you earlier this week. He’s sort of feral himself.”
“Don’t you want to do the brother thing? If you spend a lot of time with me, you’re going to figure out I’m sort of a bitch.”
He laughed, having to put down his cup of coffee before he started to choke.
“Gorgeous, I figured that out weeks ago. I’m still here.”
She pulled her phone out to check her calendar and noted she had several bookings starting in just a few hours and lasting until about an hour before the party. She frowned. She’d told Maggie, the woman who ran the shop, that it was all right to give her appointments, so it wasn’t like anyone had done anything wrong. The business was good. She liked having money in savings. But, she had to admit she liked the idea of spending time with Jonah and meeting his brother.
She looked up from the phone and shrugged. “Apparently I’m going to be inking people for many hours today. I’m sorry. I love to kayak though, so if you want to in the future and feel up to having me along, I’d go.”
“That’s a deal.”
15
“Nope. Wait.” He gave an imperious look her way before he got out and walked around to her side to open her door and give her a hand out.
Then he kept her hand and she didn’t quite know what to do, so she let him.
The place was awash in kids and it made her smile.
Erin was out on the large lawn with them and she looked up, waving. Alexander looked to see what his mother was doing and caught sight of Raven, his little face lighting up.
She let go of Jonah’s hand and bent to grab Alexander up into a hug when he came running her way.
“You’re here, Auntie!”
“Of course I am.” She kissed his cheeks, hugging him again.
“I missed you. We have candy.”
“Dude, candy? I’m really glad I came now. Would you like to meet a new friend?”
“Sure!”
She turned to face Jonah. “Alexander, this is my friend Jonah. He’s Levi’s big brother.”
“Yo, Jonah!”
Jonah grinned; all that imperious masterful Dom stuff had melted away in the face of this little boy. “Yo, Alexander. Raven told me all about you. I have to admit I ate some of your Goldfish. I promise to replace them before you come over again, though.”
Alexander, in a very fine Brown imitation, narrowed his eyes for a moment before he stuck his hand out. “Okay.”
Erin approached, holding Poppy, who clapped when she saw Raven.
“Hello, there, Jonah.”
Poppy leaned out, toward Raven.
“Hang on a minute, baby girl. Alexander is with Raven, then it’s your turn, all right?”
Poppy frowned but seemed satisfied for the time being.
“Dang, you’re like the Pied Piper.” Jonah winked and Alexander laughed.
“I’m glad you brought Jonah. Levi is around here somewhere. Mary and Damien got here a few minutes ago so Gillian is out back with them.”
Alexander was done being held so Raven put him down and he tore off. “Pop!” Ben and Todd came around the corner. “Daddy!”
“Yeah, poor kid, no one loves him.” Erin turned back to Raven before she pulled her into a hug, Poppy still in her arms. “Hello you. I called you twice yesterday.”
“I was really busy. Loooong day, and not now, I’ll tell you later. Now give me that baby before she jumps from your arms.”
Poppy squealed, tipping her head back, utterly confident that Raven wouldn’t drop her. That meant everything to Raven.
Erin took up next to Raven. “Let’s go around to the back. Martine has her tricycle and is riding all over the place so watch your toes.”
Jonah put an arm around her shoulders as they walked and Erin shot her a look, waggling her brows at the choker Poppy was eagerly trying to grab.
“Not for you. That’s my pretty. Don’t break it.” Poppy frowned. “I know, it’s super hard to be you.”
Then she grinned, clapping her chubby little hands.
“The jig is up, sweet girl. Auntie Raven knows your game.” She kissed Poppy’s nose. “It’ll be our secret.”
Out back, the vista overlooked the water in a sweeping and rather breathtaking view. Adrian had designed the house for Gillian as a wedding present. It made it more difficult to think he was an uptight asshole when he was so good to his wife and children.
Gillian turned, a huge smile on her face when she caught sight of Raven.
“I have no idea why she likes me so much,” she said in an undertone to Jonah, who snorted.
“Because people can see past your crusty exterior and know there’s a big heart in there.”
Emotion swept through her like wildfire as she tried to hold it together.
Erin squeezed her arm, leaning close to speak quietly. “You and I totally need to catch up. Don’t even try to get awa
y without it. I’m glad you’re here and I’m glad you brought him. Also? Nice necklace.”
Poppy loved Raven, but she adored her mother and at the sight of her, she reached out to Gillian, who caught her up with a smile. “Hello, darling. Have you brought Raven to us? Nicely done.” She gave Raven a quick hug and looked to Jonah. “Hello you. Your brother is just over there. There’s cider of the mulled and child-friendly variety.”
Jonah kissed her so quickly she didn’t have the time to be stern. Instead she smooched him back, blushing.
“Would you like a glass?” He was so gentlemanly. She never knew how to deal with it, but it made her belly all fluttery.
She nodded.
“Be back in a few then. Good to see you, Gillian.”
The three women watched him amble over to the group of men Levi was part of.
“Well now.” Gillian clucked her tongue, amusement on her face.
Raven rolled her eyes.
“So things are serious now. I knew you’d been seeing him, but you brought a date to a family party. That’s special. I quite like that. Come over this week. Adrian is off to Los Angeles and he’s taking Miles. It’s just me and Poppy and we’d love to have you for dinner and some gossip. Mary brought enough food to feed me for months.”
“Let me see what my week looks like. Brody is down a few people at the shop. I’m helping out there and then I have an evening appointment on Thursday. I’ll call you. I promise.”
Levi looked him up and down as Jonah eased into a chair near the cider.
“Wasn’t expecting to see you.”
“My lady brought me along. I figured you’d be here with yours.”
“Indeed. Couldn’t stop her if I wanted to. She’s helping Miles with something or other. I just bring her and she squeals and giggles and runs off. Like I’m going to complain?”
Jonah snorted. Raven wasn’t giggle-and-squeal material. But he sure did like that she’d invited him along.
“I’ve got three messages from Mother. I went kayaking with Eli earlier and she’d called there looking for me too.” He’d wanted Raven along but she’d had to work.
“She called me a few times too. I’m going to guess she got wind of what happened with Raven, Daisy, Mal and Gwen last night.”
Brody, who’d been sitting across from them with Adrian, leaned in. “What happened?”
If Jonah meant to make a relationship with Raven, he knew he had to deal with Brody as well.
He gave them a brief overview.
Brody sat back, shaking his head. “She’s lucky Raven didn’t pop her one. You know she does kickboxing, right? Four days a week. She’s really strong.”
He didn’t actually. He knew she worked out, but not more than that.
“She tried very hard not to make a scene. But she defended Daisy. Daisy would take a bullet for her for that.” Levi shrugged. “So of course I would too.”
Adrian didn’t say much as Jonah had spoken. “So what are you going to do? Seems to me Raven probably told you she wasn’t the society type. Gillian loves her; I don’t want to see her hurt.”
Jonah took Adrian in. “It’s been handled. My mother and Raven had a”—he paused, trying to remember how Raven put it—“a come-to-Jesus. My mother was rude. Raven put her in her place. I think this situation is going to be more about my brother and his wife and their marriage than Raven.”
“There were cracks before, but I think this might really be a point of no return for them. I don’t know.” Levi nodded. “Anyway, we’re on Raven’s side here. I promise you. Even if I wasn’t on my own, Daisy would never let me touch her boobs again if I didn’t back her up.”
Both Brown brothers nodded, easing back.
He wouldn’t tell her about this conversation. She’d be uncomfortable and that’s not what she needed. He grabbed two mugs and stood. “If you’ll excuse me, I promised Raven some cider.”
Levi stood as well. “I’ll come along with you.”
She smiled as she saw him approach and give her the cider. “That hits the spot, thanks. I’m just about to go in and help Alexander get his costume on. I’ll be out in a few.”
“What’s he going to be?”
“That’s a surprise, Jonah. Sheesh.” She turned to Levi. “Hey, Levi.”
Levi tipped his chin at her. “Hey, Raven, nice to see you.”
She went into the house after a quick kiss from Jonah and his brother gave him the eye. “So you’re not limping. Is that necklace the collar you mentioned?”
Jonah nodded. “Yesterday . . . last night . . . all of it. A lot of emotions. We talked for hours. It felt right this morning and it was.”
“Okay then. She’s okay then? I could tell how tense she was, though she was pretty good at dinner. I guess I just misjudged her, thinking she was sort of bitchy. But she protected Daisy and I owe her. You love her too, so I can admit I was wrong.”
“Oh, she can be bitchy. But people take one look and make up their minds. She’s a lot more than you see at first glance. She had a hard time, but she’s resilient. I’m ass over teakettle with that prickly woman.” He shrugged. He usually shared most everything with his brother, but he knew how difficult it had been for her to trust him and he didn’t ever want her to regret it.
“I get it. If you need to talk about it more, you know I won’t tell tales out of school.”
“Appreciate that.”
“Do you want me to do a background check on her? I mean, you’re getting serious about this woman and you don’t know much about her. It might be better to be safe than sorry. You’ve got a trust fund and a big bank account. Attractive to some women. We know she hasn’t been very constant in the past.”
Of course it was then that Erin Brown came at them from the left. She must have been walking around the porch. Her eyes were on fire and he flinched at the rage in them.
She pushed him away from the steps and Levi hurried to catch up.
“I can’t believe you!” She kept her voice down but the rage radiated off her in waves.
Jonah put his hands up. “I was going to say no.”
“You are the first person she’s let into her life this way other than me and Brody. She’s not some whore you fuck and throw away because you’re worried she’s going to steal from you. She never, ever took money from me, and I can guarantee I’ve got more than you. You asshole.”
He took her hands. “Erin, I don’t think that about her. I swear to you. I love Raven. She’s independent and strong and the last thing I’d believe about her is that she was using me.”
Levi put himself in the line of fire. “Christ, it was all me. I’m so sorry, Erin. I didn’t mean it as an insult. I want to protect my brother. But it was my suggestion, not his. I’m protective of him and my family.”
Erin rounded on Levi and Jonah felt sorry for him. “Protective? You mean how she was of your family last night? You think I haven’t heard how your sister-in-law acted? How your mother acted? You think you’re so much better than her? She’s not constant? Fuck you. She’s in there helping my little boy change into his Halloween costume. One she made for him. He wanted to be the Doctor from Doctor Who. But the one with the scarf, Tom what’s-his-name. She knows his name and he does too because she watches the show with him. No matter where she’s been or what she’s doing she will always be back here for his birthday. Don’t you fucking talk to me about constant. That woman is my best friend and no one is more constant than she is.”
Levi lost the tension in his spine and he shook his head. “I’m sorry. I was wrong. But it’s me, not Jonah. Don’t hang him with something I did. He had nothing to do with it.”
“Erin?” Raven called out from the back porch and Erin tossed such a look of malice over her shoulder that Levi flinched.
“On my way.” She turned and walked away without another word.
“Holy shit. Do you think she’s going to tell Raven? Oh my god, I’m so sorry, Jonah. Jesus. I would never want to hurt her. I swear t
o you. After Charlotte . . . I’m sorry.”
Jonah felt sick, but he understood where Levi was coming from and he also knew his brother got how wrong he’d been.
“All I can do is hope she won’t say anything. If for no other reason than to spare Raven’s feelings.
“Everything okay?” Raven asked Erin when she came back from the yard.
“Yes. Fine. What’s up?” Erin’s smile was brittle at the edges.
“I’ve known you an assload of years, Erin. What’s wrong?”
Erin sighed. “Nothing. I was just thinking about stupid stuff that got me wound up. I’m fine.”
Raven looked her over carefully but let it go. “If you say so. I’m looking for the hat. Have you seen it?”
“Oh crap. I left it in the car. I’ll be right back.” She raced out the front and Raven went back to the room where the littlest ones were getting ready.
“Your momma is going to get the hat and then you’re ready to rock.”
Alexander did a little fist pump.
Martine was dressed as a pirate ballerina. She’d wanted both so Elise had just gone with it. She wore an eye patch and a tutu and it worked.
Ben’s brother Cope and his wife Ella’s daughter Maddie was a princess, complete with one of those pointed hats with the tulle on it. As Cope treated his daughter like the sun rose and set with her, it fit. Ella, who’d always been sort of sweet and shy, had come out of her shell as a mother. Raven had watched confidence take hold as she poured her love and attention into the job. It was a good thing to see.
Poppy was a ladybug. She had a headband with little antennae and a red and black bodysuit.
Rennie had two friends along; one of them, Nina, was Arvin and Maggie’s daughter. Both parents worked at the shop with Raven and Brody.
The girls had said they were too old to dress up, but since they were there and all, they’d do it for the little kids. Raven had kept a straight face and nodded, thanking them for being so cool about it.
