by Jay Bell
William rolled over onto his back just as Kelly knelt over him. He groaned and held up one arm, the skin raw and bleeding.
“What happened?” Kelly asked.
William’s eyes went wide. “What are you doing? Run!”
“What happened?” Kelly repeated. “Are you all right?”
“I tripped,” William said. “It’s just a scratch. Go!”
Kelly glanced up. Jared hadn’t yet reached the finish line. There was still time. He’d have to kill himself trying, but there was still the slimmest of chances... and he didn’t care. He looked back down at William, at the urgency in his eyes, and almost laughed. Let Jared win. Let him strut around the school with that stupid gaudy trophy, and let him successfully impress his father with it too. Kelly no longer cared about any of that. Heading toward the finish line had lost all appeal. What mattered most was right in front of him, lying on the ground and slowly sitting up while holding the injured arm aloft.
“You know,” Kelly commented, “they say dogs have antiseptic saliva. I saw one not far back. If you want I can fetch it for you so it can lick your wounds.”
William stared at him incredulously. “The race—”
“Doesn’t matter,” Kelly said.
William eyed him for a moment. “What about Jared?”
“Doesn’t matter,” Kelly repeated.
William’s lips twitched, like he was trying not to smile. “What about me?” he asked.
Kelly grinned. “That’s a very big question. One I’m not ready to answer just yet.”
William got to his feet with a wince, waving Kelly away when he tried to help. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s finish the race.”
Kelly shook his head. “You go ahead if you want. I never should have entered. You’re here for the right reason. So is Jared. I’m not.”
“You sure?”’
“Yeah,” Kelly said. “I’m going to join my family. Once it’s all over, come find us. Okay?”
William nodded. Then he started hobbling along before he managed a decent jog. Another runner passed him, but he’d probably manage third place, assuming Anna Herbert didn’t come tearing down the street like a tornado. Kelly strolled over to the sidewalk and slowly headed toward the crowd. He could see that Jared had already crossed the finish line. Martha was there, trying to hug him as he jumped around. Jared only calmed down when his father approached and offered a hand in congratulation. Today would probably be one of the best of Jared’s life: a girl hanging off his arm, a proud father patting him on the back, and a big-ass trophy.
Kelly considered all of this. Then he smiled.
“Why didn’t you finish?”’
Kelly knew he’d be hearing this question over and over in the coming weeks. He’d have to invent a good excuse, since the truth was much too complicated. Luckily, the only person demanding an explanation at the moment was his little brother.
“Mind your own business,” Kelly said, getting him in a headlock. Then he released him and smiled innocently at his father, who had raised his eyebrows in warning.
“Why’d you stop for that guy?” Royal asked, unabashed.
“Because he owed me money,” Kelly said. “I got a twenty off him while he was still down.”’
This made Royal laugh, which would hopefully stem the tide of questions. At least their parents seemed to understand.
“That’s him, isn’t it?” his mother asked. “That’s your William.”’
“He’s not my anything. At least not yet. But yeah.”’
Laisha’s face lit up, just like it did every time Kelly revealed he was interested in someone. “Do we get to meet him today?”’
“Sure.” Kelly strained to see over the crowds. “He probably has to receive his third-place medal along with the other winners. But afterwards, I’ll introduce you. Just be discreet. He’s still coming to terms with everything.”’
His parents nodded their understanding. Royal was oblivious, already lost in a handheld video game. As it turned out, they didn’t have long to wait. William appeared just a few minutes later, patiently working his way through the crowd with his parents in tow. Odd, since Coach Watson could be heard announcing the winners.
“Fourth place,” William explained, holding up a ribbon.
“Really?” Kelly asked in disbelief. “What happened? Anna Herbert?”
“Yup. Came out of nowhere.”
They shared a laugh before remembering their families. Then the typical introductions took place, the adults stepping forward and exchanging first names. These always sounded a little odd to Kelly, who only thought of them as Mom and Dad. The adults engaged in small talk, complimenting each other’s children, even though they didn’t really know them well. William was praised for finishing so early, and Kelly for stopping to help him when he fell. All of this made him feel awkward, so he stepped aside to talk to William.
“You would have won,” William said. “Before I went and ruined it all, Jared was falling behind.”
Kelly shrugged to show it didn’t interest him. “So what’s the rest of your day like? Want to go out and celebrate?”
“Yeah,” William said. “Except my parents said they’d treat me to dinner and a movie. Just look at them!”
Kelly glanced to where Mrs. Townson nodded at something his mother was saying, while Mr. Townson showed his father a business card. He didn’t see anything special, so he turned back to William for clarification.
“They’re getting along great,” William said, eyes shining as he watched them.
Ah. “That’s cool. Go have fun with them. Enjoy yourself.”
“What about tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow is good,” Kelly said. “I don’t have anything going on. Besides my little youth group, that is.”
“Oh,” William said. Then realization dawned. “Oh!”
“I don’t have to go,” Kelly said. “Let’s hang out.”
“I could come with you,” William suggested.
“Really?”
“Yeah! I’m curious.”
Kelly supposed that was normal, although for some reason, the idea made him slightly uneasy. Regardless, this was a crucial part of coming out, since it was important to see that other gay people existed. They weren’t alone. He just hoped William would remain interested after discovering how many options he had. A guy like him would be popular, meaning Kelly needed to express what he felt before it was too late.
The hom honked once, annoying and shrill. After a moment’s pause, Kelly pressed on the steering wheel again. Then he got out of the car, motioning for William to do the same. “It’ll be more dramatic this way,” he explained.
William peered at the front of the house. “Your friend doesn’t know I’m tagging along?”
“Nope. She won’t mind, don’t worry.”
Bonnie appeared on the front porch, closing the door behind her before stopping to stare. Then she continued down the walkway, looking William over a few times.
“Who’s this?” she asked.
“Hitchhiker,” Kelly said. “I thought we could bring him to our special meeting. Try to convert him.”
“Worth a shot,” she replied, holding out her hand. “I’m Bonnie.”
“William.” He looked a little dumbfounded as they shook. “So you’re really a lesbian?”
“Yup!”
“Wow!” William said with wonder, like someone discovering an honest-to-goodness dinosaur at a pet store. He must have realized how overboard this reaction was because his face turned red.
Bonnie beamed in return. “Oh, this meeting is going to be so much fun! Let’s go.”
She climbed into the backseat, despite William insisting she could sit up front. On the way to the church, she asked for details about the triathlon. Kelly had already told her most of it while texting last night, but of course in person he could make the story more dramatic. He left out his big revelation at the end. She already knew that part, and talking about it in front of Willi
am would be embarrassing.
Once they arrived at the church, Kelly’s apprehension increased. As much as he liked these meetings, they could be a meat market. Especially when someone new arrived. Still, keeping William hidden away felt immoral, like obscuring the truth from a lover so he wouldn’t leave. Too slimy. No, this was the honorable thing to do.
Five minutes later, Kelly decided honor wasn’t so important. Already three different guys had walked up to William and introduced themselves. Layne—Mr. Everything is a Joke—had taken an interest in romance, hooking his arm through William’s and dragging him away toward the refreshment table.
“Patricia May,” Bonnie said from next to him. “You remember her?”
“Yes,” Kelly answered tersely.
Bonnie explained anyway. “New girl at school, ridiculously pretty. She had that brownish red hair. Isn’t there some sort of wood like that?”
“Rosewood,” Kelly said, not taking his eyes off of William.
“Yeah.” Bonnie sighed at the memory. “Then I had the stupid idea of bringing her here, and before I even had a chance to kiss her, she ran off with Christine. Christine! The girl who couldn’t make it through a single meeting without farting.”
Kelly smirked. “I wonder what happened to her. We did see her at that one party, remember? She said Patricia was crazy, that her family was mixed up in some kind of cult.”
“Doesn’t matter,” Bonnie said. “I still would have liked to get her in the sack. That’s what I should have done before I brought her here.”
Kelly shook his head. “Young lady, you are unscrupulous.”
“Thank you,” Bonnie said. “So have you two bumped bare feet yet?” “No. I just figured out how I feel, and all of this is new to him, so I figured we should take things slow. Besides...”
“Besides?”
Kelly shrugged. “What if he’s just a rebound? I don’t want to use him. Think what a crappy experience that would be for us both.”
“Don’t sell yourself short.” Bonnie thought for a moment. “I’m pretty sure you have to actually be with someone before you can have a rebound. Jared doesn’t count.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Oh.” Kelly watched as Layne tried to hand-feed William a cheese cracker. Time to intervene. Kelly walked over and snatched the cracker from Layne. “I saved you a seat, William. Let’s go.”
Just as Layne opened his mouth to protest, Kelly popped in the cracker, silencing any rebuttal. The meeting began shortly afterwards. Today Phil lectured them on politics, talking about Stonewall, Harvey Milk, and other events and people that helped pioneer the modern gay rights movement. William listened with rapt attention while Kelly spent most of his time staring down anyone who looked at William. He wasn’t usually the jealous type, but maybe Bonnie was right. Bringing William here without having staked a claim was foolish. Once the lecture was over, he stayed by William’s side, which helped deflect would-be suitors. Lisa walked over and asked in her usual bashful tones if they were a couple, which caused William to blush. Kelly waited for a definitive answer and ended up witnessing a shy person standoff. When it was clear an answer wasn’t forthcoming, Kelly pretended not to have heard the question.
Once the meeting was over, they went to a diner, sipping drinks with Bonnie at a table separate from everyone else. Kelly found himself waiting for William to grab his hand or compliment him or flirt or even attempt a clumsy kiss. Nothing. Maybe they needed to be alone, but after they dropped off Bonnie, the results were the same. Even in the privacy of William’s room, all that happened was a little small talk, a pizza delivery, and three episodes of Beast Wars.
Perhaps Jared was right. Being black was a disadvantage or an undesirable characteristic. At least to some people. William wasn’t racist, but maybe Kelly wasn’t his type. Maybe William dreamed of a pale-and-pasty redhead—Patricia May as a boy. Or perhaps he was still debating if getting involved with a guy was worth risking a career in the Coast Guard.
“I should probably head home,” Kelly said. “It’s getting late.”
William nodded. “I’ll see you out.”
The perfect opportunity for a parting kiss. Outside they stood next to Kelly’s car, watching each other without speaking. This is when it would happen. Except it didn’t. William opened the car door and Kelly got inside. Then he spent the entire drive home feeling certain that he’d lost at the game of love yet again.
Chapter Six
happy Birthday
Kelly read and reread the text message, searching for hidden meaning like he did with any of William’s words or actions. Just a common phrase this time, but even it could be interpreted. No exclamation point, for instance. Did that show a lack of enthusiasm? Then again, there wasn’t any punctuation at all. And why was ‘birthday’ capitalized?
Kelly rolled his eyes. The last three days had been hell. Not only was he overanalyzing the slightest interaction between William and himself, but avoiding Jared had become inconvenient. Kelly steered clear of his locker, his backpack overburdened with books. Lunches were spent eating outside. Alone. Even when it had rained on Tuesday. Of course this only delayed the inevitable. Once track season started in the spring, he’d have no choice but to be around him. Kelly wasn’t giving up his Olympic dream just to avoid hearing Jared gloat about his trophy.
At least today was free from such problems. Kelly stretched out in bed and sighed contentedly. He’d never been to school on his birthday in his life. Not once. His mother always let him stay home to celebrate his big day. When he and Royal were younger, she would take the day off work to be with them. Today Kelly had the house all to himself. Already he had indulged in cheesy soap operas, surfed the Net for porn, and been as absolutely lazy as possible. Now the afternoon was winding down and he needed to make himself presentable. He rose to get started when his phone chimed again.
are you skipping? can’t find you anywhere
Kelly smiled and texted back. Eager to give me my present?
you have no idea
Okay... I’m at home. You coming over soon?
yup
Kelly tossed the phone aside and headed for the shower. He’d taken a luxurious bath in the morning, but they never left him feeling as clean. Once he was dressed, he headed downstairs. His mother came through the door just as he was leaving, carrying a boxed cake. She instantly got sappy when she saw him, like he’d just popped out of the womb.
“My birthday boy,” she said, misty-eyed. “I can’t believe how big you’ve gotten.”
“I’m the same size I was yesterday,” Kelly teased as he pressed past her. “I’m headed out to pick up Bonnie.”
“Don’t be too long!”
“I’m not going to miss my own birthday, don’t worry.” He hesitated. “If William shows up while I’m gone, don’t say anything weird.”
His mother shook her head like he was being silly. Maybe he was. He knew the answer to all of his problems. This mystery was easy to solve. Even Bonnie stated the obvious when Kelly picked her up from her school.
“Just ask him,” she said, adjusting her seatbelt so it wasn’t crushing her boobs. “Better yet, make a move. Kiss him or hold his hand. Anything!”
“I can’t,” Kelly said. “Seriously. I can’t handle any more rejection right now. Not after Jared.”
“Fine.” Bonnie glanced out the window. “Can I ask him? I’ll pull him aside where you can’t hear. If he likes you, I’ll let you know.”
“And if you don’t mention the subject again, I’ll know he doesn’t!”
“He likes you,” Bonnie said.
“As a friend, maybe.”
She raised an eyebrow. “If it wasn’t your birthday, I’d give you such a talking-to!”
Thank goodness for that. His mother already pestered him daily for details that didn’t exist. With this in mind, he pressed on the accelerator and hurried home. His father’s car was in the driveway, but no sign of William yet.
&nb
sp; Once they were inside, Bonnie hung out with his mother in the kitchen, comfortable in her presence. His father forced a hug on him and offered his congratulations before getting distracted by Royal, who was bragging about a new high score. This left Kelly free to repeatedly glance out front. After the five millionth time—or so it felt to Kelly— William’s car finally appeared. He wore yet another polo shirt, this one pale yellow with light blue stripes. Kelly normally turned up his nose at William’s fashion sense, but today the colors complemented his fair complexion. He wasn’t carrying anything, so no birthday present, unless it was small enough to fit in his pocket. A wedding ring, maybe?
Kelly laughed madly. Then he tried to calm himself and opened the door. William looked surprised for a moment before grinning. That’s all it took for Kelly’s insides to start doing back flips. He felt woozy. Maybe he needed one of those fainting couches Victorian women were always collapsing onto.
“—such a nice neighborhood,” William was saying. “I didn’t know you were rich.”
“I try to keep a low profile,” Kelly responded. “I get a lot of gold diggers after me.”
He ushered William inside and started doing introductions before he remembered it wasn’t necessary.
“We’re just waiting a moment for the ice cream to thaw,” Laisha said. “Then we’ll have cake.”
“Great,” Kelly said, unnerved by how his mother kept looking between them and smiling. “Uh, I’m going to show William my room.”
To his horror, her smile got even brighter. It’s not like they were going to have a quickie. Although Kelly wasn’t exactly against the idea.
“It’s cool to finally see where you live,” William said on the way up the stairs. “Makes me embarrassed of my place.”
“I like your house,” Kelly said. “Besides, I’m just as broke as you are. At least until I open my presents. My grandparents always send cash.”
“Nice,” William replied. “I’ll give you my present later, okay?”
“You don’t have to give me anything,” Kelly said, but he glanced over at William, searching for a hint.
