by Sloan Storm
Meanwhile, here I sit, stuck in this office day after day, a slave to Grey’s idea of what this company should be.
I know, I know… Man’s world.
And I was surrounded by them on all sides!
Trevor took my pride and self-respect and pretty well crushed those into dust through the gristmill of his evil soul. And Grey. Obviously he had my body and if I wasn’t careful, my heart. I swallowed hard at the notion of what my life would be like with both of those in his grasp to do whatever he pleased, if he wasn't doing it already.
Placing my elbows on my desk, I dropped my head down and rested it on my forearms in frustration. Just then, the speaker on my office phone caught my attention. Lifting my head a bit, I peeked through an opening in my hair and looked to my right where the offensive noisemaker blinked red at me.
“Miss Olsen?” Carmen began. “Katy is here to see you.”
“Okay,” I replied.
Get it together girl.
A few minutes later, Katy and I sat down on a couch in my office and began to eat. She hadn’t seen the offices yet, which I know is terrible, but the thought never occurred to me. What was that all about, anyway? How was it I’d reached a point already where I allowed something like that to happen? Ugh, I had no clue and for now, I didn’t want to think about it.
But, she was thoughtful enough to congratulate me and even bring me a little plant as an office warming gift. She could be sweet like that. We made a bit of chit-chat about her roommate search, which still hadn’t resolved itself.
Anyway, for a change, I was actually eating something healthy for lunch today. It wasn’t my doing of course, Katy offered to bring something in with her. Knowing her, I figured the meal would at least be good for me. I’ve always been lucky that I tend to skip meals as opposed to eating junk when I’m stressed, so although the business, and Grey, were exhausting me lately it hadn’t hit my waistline yet.
Small victories.
Halfway through a mouthful of my spinach, cranberry and feta salad, I listened as Katy said, “Maddie, um, I just want to tell you again how sorry I am for what happened. It was a stupid thing to do what I did.”
The tang of the vinaigrette dressing lingered in my mouth as I looked up at her.
“Yes. It was,” I replied.
Pursing her lips, Katy placed her plastic salad container down in her lap. After wiping her fingers and the edges of her mouth with her napkin, she turned to face me.
“Can you forgive me?”
“Of course. I know how convincing Grey can be. Let’s forget about it.”
As I finished speaking, I noticed a glassy sheen appear in her eyes. With her napkin, she dabbed at the corner of one of them. I felt terrible and I got up to comfort her. However, she waved me off right away.
“It’s okay. I’m fine. I just… I miss you,” she said. “We don’t talk at all.”
“I know. I’m sorry,” I said, as I dropped my hands in my lap and balled my napkin up in my lap. “It’s just that the business, it takes up all of my time. If I’m not working, I’d rather be asleep. That is, unless Grey happens to be in town, which, uh, he hasn't been for over a week now.”
Katy listened intently as I spoke.
“Asleep?” she said. “Are you depressed?”
I shrugged.
“I don’t know. I don’t think so. Mostly I’m exhausted all the time.”
“From work or sex?” Katy asked. Her lips curled with a devious intent.
I moaned. “When he’s around, yes. But when he’s not, I don’t know, Katy. I’m just not right. It’s almost like I’m a junkie or something. I swear.”
Katy nodded. “That’s what it sounds like… withdrawal.”
“I know!” I exclaimed as I leaned back. “That’s not normal is it?”
“Normal?” Katy asked as she made a sweeping gesture around the office with her arms. “Is any of this ‘normal’ Maddie? Is that what you want out of life? To be normal? Normal is shit, if you ask me.”
I sighed. “I get what you mean, but at the same time… What am I doing with him? There’s no anything between us aside from the sex. Not that I’m complaining about it, mind you, but most times I wonder if he’d even still be around if not for the business.”
As I finished speaking, quiet fell upon us.
“Just keep your guard up, Maddie.”
“That’s just it, Katy. I don’t know how much longer I can.”
MADDIE
Grey returned to town Thursday night for a long weekend and per his request, I arranged for us to have dinner at Chef Claude’s that evening. After we’d taken our seats, a feeling of comfort broke over me. Sometimes familiar things can be the last thing you need in life, while at other moments it’s the only thing.
Tonight was one of the latter.
Since the last time we ate here, my life had become unrecognizable to me. I went from being an unemployed and basically aimless twenty-three year old failed actress to running a business full-time and employing nearly a dozen people. Life was moving too fast for me these days and I needed it to slow down a bit. But that scenario looked to be unlikely, impossible even.
I really didn’t know how much more I could take. I was to the point where I just wanted to turn the whole thing over to Grey and walk away. Terrible, I know, but not everyone is cut out for running a business. I’d reached a stage where I was in over my head. It didn’t matter how many people I had working for me. It was just too much.
And so it was that even though the surroundings of Chef Claude’s brought back memories of a simpler time, the new and improved business-Maddie felt compelled to start off a lovely evening with updates about happenings at the office. Yet, no sooner had I started to recount a bit of workplace drama, than Grey raised his wine glass with his right hand while waving me off with his left.
“Maddie,” he began. “Let’s not talk business tonight. All right?”
Dumbfounded, I looked at Grey as if he had lobsters crawling out of his ears.
“What?” He shrugged as he swirled the maroon liquid around in his glass.
I shook my head.
“I just want to make sure I heard that correctly. You, Grey Sinclair. You don’t want to talk business?”
Grey sniffed in amusement as he took a sip of his wine. “No. Is that a problem?”
I raised my hands in a small gesture of mock surrender. “What? No. Not at all. You don’t have to tell me twice.”
Just then, the waiter returned to take our dinner order. I couldn’t remember the last time Grey and I talked about anything but business and if not for his sudden refusal to do so now, I would have kept up the pattern.
I felt a twinge of sadness at the thought.
Not even two months in and here we sat, more business associates than lovers. Maybe Grey felt it and this was his way of putting a stop to it. Then again, maybe not. After all, he’d never made any suggestion of the sort. What was behind this gesture? Was there any meaning to it or, for once, was Greyson Sinclair simply tired?
If he was, he didn’t look it.
As he finished ordering for us, I decided to let it go for now and try to enjoy my evening. After all, I had no idea when this opportunity might present itself again, if ever.
And just as the waiter walked away, for a moment at least, all seemed right with the world.
Then, in the blink of an eye, it wasn’t.
“Madds!” I heard a voice from my past call out.
Fuck.
Trevor.
Sighing, I rolled my eyes and placed my wine glass down on the table as my ex-boyfriend approached. Ever the social misfit, Trevor had a knack for making moments well, his own. These ranged from the mildly awkward to the downright uncomfortable and everything in-between. And by looks of the bimbo-in-tow tonight, I wasn’t optimistic that this encounter would be that much better, especially with Grey sitting here.
“Who’s that?” Grey asked.
“What? Oh, he’s just a fri
end.”
Lifting his napkin from his lap, Grey smiled, stood and tossed it on the table.
“Promised Chef Claude a visit. Enjoy yours. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
Thank. You. God. That was all I needed right now.
“Okay.” Playing it cool, I nodded, looked up at him and smiled. I pulled a strand of hair behind my ear and continued, “Tell him I said hello.”
Grey smiled, straightened his tie and headed the direction opposite of Trevor. I turned my head and watched his ass, I mean him, walk away.
Still though, what an ass on that man…
Then as quickly as a flicker of lust rose up within me, I swiveled my head back to Trevor and his whore du jour and almost as rapidly as it grew, the spark flickered out.
Slithering up to the table, Trevor nodded in Grey’s direction. “Who’s the suit?”
“Oh, no one. It’s just a business meeting,” I said, shaking my head and hoping he would drop it.
He smirked. “Still giving that a go then, are you?”
“Yes,” I said as I rolled my eyes at him. “What do you want, Trevor? I’m busy.”
Trevor clapped his hands and rubbed them together with vigor. “Oh nothing, we’re just out celebrating. I got another big raise and a promotion. I saw you when I walked in and figured you’d want to know. That is, in case you’re still looking for that loan.”
“Thrilling,” I said, as I gripped the stem of the wine glass. Wanting nothing more than to break it in half to express in actions what I couldn’t in words, I continued, “Congratulations. And no, I don’t need any money.”
“Trevor,” the bimbo whined as she tugged on his sleeve. “I’m hungry. And bored.”
“One second, Julie,” he said.
Julie? What happened to the other one? The one he left me for? Teresa or Tamara? Or whoever the hell she was?
Trevor angled his head down at me in disgust.
“Why can’t you be happy for me, Maddie? We came out here together, you know? You saw what I went through to make it. I assumed you’d be a little more supportive.”
“Uh! Trevor!” I snapped, nearly snapping the stem in the process. “You cannot be that stupid. That is precisely the reason I’m not happy for you in the slightest. How can you not get that?”
Trevor shrugged. “What are you talking about, Madds?”
“Oh, my God!” I exclaimed as I picked up a knife from the table and brandished at him. “Call me that one more time. Do it. I dare you.”
Trevor’s arm candy ducked behind him. “What’s her problem?”
“Don’t worry about it, babe.” Trevor said as he reached around behind himself and patted her on the butt.
Ugh. Gross.
“Just… you know what? Just go.” I said as I waggled my fingers with a shooing motion. “I don’t want to get into a whole thing with you here, Trevor. Please go away.”
“Whatever,” Trevor scoffed. Seconds later, they’d disappeared almost as quickly as they’d shown up.
I will never understand men. That girl was trashy. And so was the one he left me for!
Idiot!
And, for the record, I was being completely objective here. They are all skanks.
On the other hand, he was with someone. I wasn’t alone either, but… at least Trevor wasn't lonely. He had someone to come home to every night. What did I have? I had no idea, but it certainly wasn’t that. And even though Grey never promised me anything of the sort, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t holding out hope. Then again, I’d held out hope for Trevor for half a decade and look where that got me.
Fuck.
Picking up my half-full wine glass, I slugged the entire contents back in one huge gulp. The smoky, fruit-flavored alcohol rushed down my gullet. I set the glass back down on the table and watched as the fingers of purple slid back down along the inside of it. As they did, I felt myself slump a bit into my chair as if I were mirroring the lazy rivulets.
In my trance, I hadn’t noticed Grey’s return. In fact, I had no idea he was there at all until his voice snapped me out of my self-hypnosis.
“Maddie?” he said, as he eased back into his chair.
My eyes met his. Jesus, he was so handsome. Beautiful. In another life, he could have easily been a movie star. He belonged here among the flashing lights, glitz and glamour.
I used to think I did too.
MADDIE
Seeing Trevor a couple of nights before not only ticked me off, but also made me realize that one of the main reasons I’d given up on my passion for acting was because of what happened between us. And of course, even if I’d realized that about Trevor sooner, it wouldn’t have mattered much, since Grey all but told me to give up even thinking about acting as long as I worked in the business with him.
And so, whether my motivation was to get back at Trevor or tell Grey to shove his high-handed ways, I made the decision that my acting career hadn’t seen its final curtain call. Maddie Olsen’s name would still appear in lights. With that in mind, I had to start where it made the most sense. I figured if I was to have any chance at all of breaking back into the business, the first call I had to place would be to my old agent. That afternoon, that’s exactly what I did.
I’d had a number of agents since I came to Los Angeles years ago. None of them were worth much, but without them it was almost impossible to get anywhere. Anyway, before I stopped working, the last agent I had was Harvey Bachman.
Harvey was a legend of sorts. Well, it was more accurate to say his family was. Back in the days of Vaudeville, his grandfather and great uncles had a show called the ‘The Flying Bachman Brothers’, which was apparently a hybrid trapeze, tap dance and singing act that traveled up and down the Eastern seaboard.
With the birth of television, the family patriarch, Albert Bachman, saw an opportunity to retire from the road. So, he brought the family to Hollywood. In those early days, variety shows with acts like theirs dominated the airwaves, making them an overnight sensation.
Anyway, as the years went by, demand for them waned and by the time Harvey’s generation rose to influence, the Bachman name was little more than a footnote in television lore. Even so, the Bachmans were a tenacious bunch. Family members and descendants were littered all over the valley, still hovering around the industry to this day. And that, of course, included my agent, Harvey.
The phone rang three times and after the third ring a woman with a thick Asian accent answered the phone. It wasn’t Harvey’s old assistant, Richelle -- that much was certain.
“Yes,” I began, as I struggled to cut through the thick Asian accent on the other end of the line. “Is Harvey in?”
“Yes, who may I say is carring?”
“Oh, yes. My name is Madeline Olsen. Maddie. You can just tell him it’s Maddie calling. He’ll know who it is.”
“Arr right.”
The phone went silent for several moments and then clicked to life once again.
“Maddie! Sweetheart!” Harvey’s voice boomed. “What’s the story with you? I thought you were done. Quitting! That’s what you told me.”
“I was. Am. Uh, I don’t know. There’s just a lot going on right now. I was hoping there might be an audition or hell, maybe even a part or…”
“Grace!” Harvey yelled into the phone. “Get in here!”
“Maddie, baby, excuse me for one second.”
Harvey was never one to filter his conversations, so he didn’t bother to cover the phone as he spoke. This was especially true when it came to the unfortunate parade of ever changing assistants in his office. I assumed Grace was the woman who answered the phone and the latest addition to the employee cavalcade, but I had no idea since I hadn’t been there in months.
“One sec, Maddie.” Harvey said as he lowered the receiver away from his mouth. “What part of no onions do you not understand Grace? Do they not have vegetables in Seoul? Here, come get this. I want those scraped off of there. Got me?”
I shook my head as
the scene between Harvey and this poor woman unfolded in my mind.
“Here take this thing. Yeah, go on now. Scrape them off and bring it back. I’m starving.”
Just then, Harvey’s voice caught my attention again as he returned to the call. “Maddie. Okay, where were we?”
I opened my mouth and began to say something when once again, he lit into poor Grace.
“Grace! Wait, grab that script right there. The orange one… No. Orange. Do you know what an orange is Grace? Wait? Why would you? You don’t know what a damn onion is, so why should an orange be any different? Yes, that one. Hand it to me.”
“Right with you, Maddie.”
“Okay.”
“Keep it up Grace and your FOB butt is going back to Korea. Don’t think I can’t get another one just like ya. A dime a dozen over here. You’ll wind up working at a liquor store in Watts if you don’t shape up. Now scrape off those onions ASAP.”
“FOB?” I chuckled. “Trouble with the help, Harvey?”
“Yeah, there’s trouble. Trouble for her! FOB is Fresh Off the Boat. Employees, Maddie. If you can avoid them in your line of work, by all means you should. She’s probably spitting on my lunch as we speak. Anyway, what can I do for ya?”
I swallowed as I began.
“Well, as I mentioned, I was hoping you might have some auditions or maybe even a lead for a part.”
I heard the sound of pages being turned in the background as I talked.
“Mmm, hmm,” he muttered as I spoke.
I continued, “It’s just that well, I think I’d still like to give it one more shot. I mean, I know I’m rusty but you know I’m a hard worker. I’ve got time for any audition you’ve got. Anywhere. Just name it.”
“Uh huh,” he grumbled as I finished.
I started to embellish my point when Harvey spoke up again, cutting me off in the process.
“Well, Maddie, you kinda up and vanished on me. You know how hard it is to get work in this town? Give me a good reason why I should stick my neck out for you, when I got several dozen girls, two to three years younger than you, who’d be perfect. And most of them would be willing to do whatever it takes.”
