by Rhoda Baxter
‘Nothing,’ Hibs and Beth said simultaneously.
Vik rolled his eyes. ‘Fine. Let me figure it out.’ He narrowed his eyes and looked from one to the other.
Beth looked away from him. For one irrational moment she thought Vik might see into her head and recognise the guilt.
‘I reckon,’ Vik said, slowly, ‘it’s all gone weird because Hibs is dating your housemate, Beth. It’s like a whole work/real life collision thing.’ He looked pleased with himself. ‘Am I right?’
Hibs finally turned round. ‘Yes, Vik. That’s right,’ he said, his voice heavy with sarcasm. ‘I’m sleeping with Beth’s housemate and it’s freaked us both out so much that we can barely stand each other’s company. ’Cause we’re soooo delicate.’ He brushed past Vik and strode out of the lab.
‘If that’s not it, what is it?’ Vik gave Beth a puzzled look. ‘I know you guys have had an argument. If it’s not about Anna, then what is it about?’
Beth sighed. ‘It’s complicated, Vik, okay. Just drop it.’
‘I can’t. I have to work here too. It’s not exactly fun at the moment. I feel like a UN peacekeeper.’
Thankfully, Beth’s phone rang, rescuing her from having to explain something she wasn’t even sure she understood. It was Lara.
‘Hey,’ Beth said. ‘How’s it going?’
There was a sniff at the other end of the line.
‘Lara?’
‘He’s gone.’
‘What?’
‘Chris has gone, Beth. I gave him an ultimatum and he … he left me. I don’t know what I expected but …’ Soft sobs came down the line.
‘Oh, Lara. Where are you? I’ll come straight over.’
‘What’s going on?’ Vik said when Beth had hung up.
‘I’ve got to go. I’ll see you tomorrow.’ She paused to pat him on the arm. ‘I’ll try and cheer up before then, okay?’
Before she went to Lara’s, she had to phone Gordon. Beth stood next to her bike, phone in hand, psyching herself up. He would be annoyed. She hated it when he was annoyed. He got all shouty. But Lara needed her so she had to go. It wasn’t like she had any choice.
She took a deep breath and pressed the call button. Gordon’s phone rang a few times and went to answerphone. Beth let her shoulders relax. It always went to answerphone. Gordon claimed that mobile phone reception in his building was terrible, which is why he never picked up when she rang.
She explained that there was an emergency with Lara and that she had to cancel. ‘I’m very sorry,’ she added, before hanging up.
As she cycled to Lara’s she wondered how long it would take him to pick up the message. How angry would he be? They were supposed to be going to the opera that evening. Gordon had tickets and everything. He was always a little more uptight about things when he had bought tickets so he wouldn’t be pleased with her cancelling. She was fully expecting to get an irritated phone call from him in a bit. She hoped he would understand that Lara needed her more than he did.
Lara answered the door, her eyes and nose red from crying. Beth forgot all about Gordon and gave her friend a hug. ‘You poor thing.’
Lara blew her nose and nodded. ‘I’m glad you came.’ She led the way into the living room. Everything looked normal, as far as Beth could tell. The only difference was the wedding photo was now face-down on the mantelpiece.
‘Tell me everything,’ she said.
‘I should put the kettle on—’
‘I’ll take care of that.’ Beth stopped her. ‘You tell me while I make the tea.’
Lara’s house was small and the kitchen led into the living room. Lara sat on a dining chair, just outside the kitchen, while Beth put the kettle on. ‘There isn’t a lot to tell. He came home late again last night and I confronted him. He denied it to start with, and then he said it meant nothing.’ Lara blew her nose. ‘I said it clearly wasn’t nothing and he had to choose between her and me and …’ Her voice broke in a sob. ‘He stormed off. He … he was gone all night. Then this morning I called him. He said he needed to clear his head and think things through.’ Fresh tears spilled down her face. ‘When I got back from work today, all his stuff had gone.’
‘Oh, honey.’ Beth went over and put her arms around Lara and held her until the sobs subsided. It was a shock to see Lara, who was normally so composed, in such a state.
In Beth’s pocket, her phone rang. She glanced at the clock – it was just past seven. She should have been meeting Gordon about now. She pushed the thought to the back of her mind and concentrated on Lara. ‘What are you going to do?’
Lara sniffed and rubbed her cheeks with the back of her hand. ‘I don’t know. I have no idea what happens next.’
Beth perched on the arm of the sofa. ‘If he came back, would you try again?’
Lara stared into space. ‘No.’ She shook her head. ‘Probably not. I’m not sure.’
‘He cheated on you,’ said Beth. ‘And then, when you found out, he just left.’
Lara nodded. ‘I know. Every sensible part of me says “good riddance”, but inside …’ Tears appeared again. She wiped them away with a tissue.
‘Maybe you just need some time to work things out.’
In Beth’s pocket the phone rang again. She ignored it, but her heart pounded. Gordon would be angry. She didn’t like it when Gordon was angry.
‘Should you get that?’ said Lara.
‘It’s Gordon,’ Beth said, without bothering to check the phone. ‘I’ll call him back. This is important.’
Lara sighed. ‘Take the call. I’ll be okay.’
Beth gave her a grateful smile and answered the phone. She headed to the hallway, where she was less likely to be overheard.
‘Where are you?’ Gordon’s voice was curt. She could feel his annoyance.
‘I don’t think I’ll be able to make it,’ Beth said. ‘I’m at Lara’s. She’s really upset. I can’t leave her.’
‘What do you mean you won’t be able to make it? I’ve got tickets for the opera. The doors open in an hour.’
‘I know, I know. I’m so sorry. I really am, but I can’t leave Lara now. Chris has just left—’
‘I don’t care what Lara wants. You made a commitment, Beth. You should stick to it.’
‘But—’
‘But nothing. I can’t believe you’re standing me up! After I rushed from training to be with you. How could you do this to me? Am I not important to you?’
Beth’s heart was pounding. She felt so guilty. She should have kept trying his phone, or left a longer message, so that at least she could explain before he got angry, rather than making excuses now. She was so stupid. ‘I’m sorry, Gordon.’
‘Sorry? Sorry?’ Gordon was hissing down the phone now, which was somehow worse than his shouting. ‘You think sorry is going to cover it? You’ve let me down.’
‘I’ll make it up to you? Tomorrow—’
‘I thought you were working tomorrow. Or have you been lying to me again?’
‘No. No. I am working. We can meet up between readings though. I’ll cook you dinner,’ she was speaking as fast as she could, so that she could say her piece before he cut her off again. ‘I’ll make lasagne. Your favourite.’
There was a pause as Gordon considered this.
‘I’ll even make crumble for pudding.’ He loved crumble. Making him an apple crumble always cheered him up. She hoped it would work this time too. She hated it when he was angry with her.
‘Okay. I’ll see you at your flat at ten past seven.’ He didn’t sound so angry now and Beth breathed out in relief.
‘Thank you.’
He didn’t respond.
‘I love you,’ she said. But he had already hung up.
Beth felt weak. She put her phone back in her pock
et and steadied herself against the wall for a moment. That was the first time Gordon had been angry with her since they’d got back together. He would get over it; he always did. But she had forgotten how his temper could flare. She needed to be more careful and not annoy him so much.
She went back into the kitchen and started making tea, hoping the ritual would soothe her nerves. Lara’s kitchen was small and homely. It looked just like it had always done, until Beth looked closer and started noticing things. Chris’s posh knives were gone: the magnetic strip only had one knife on it. The black-and-white cafetière that normally stood next to the kettle was gone too. Nothing major, just little signs of the gap in her friend’s life.
Beth opened the cupboard and saw the lovely matching china mugs that Lara and Chris had received as a wedding gift. She reached around them and found a pair of mismatched porcelain mugs. Poor Lara. Lara was the important one at this moment. She needed to focus on her. Worrying about Gordon would have to wait.
When she returned to the living room Lara, looked up. ‘Everything okay?’
‘Yes,’ Beth lied. ‘Everything’s fine.’
Chapter Fifteen
The next day the reception desk called up to say a bunch of flowers had arrived for Beth. She ran down to collect them. It was a bouquet of roses. Pink and red.
The little card tucked in between the flowers read, ‘Sorry I got annoyed. Hope your evening went okay. I took a colleague from the dept. in the end, so got to see the opera after all. Looking forward to dinner. Gordon.’
Beth smiled and took the flowers back up to the lab.
‘Flowers? Have you got a secret admirer?’ said Vik.
‘They’re from Gordon.’
‘Why? What’s he done?’ Hibs said.
‘Nothing. He’s not done anything.’ Why did Hibs always assume the worst of Gordon? What was his problem? ‘He just sent me flowers, okay. He’s my boyfriend. It’s a nice thing to do.’
Hibs snorted. ‘Right. Gordon’s being nice for no reason? Like that’s going to happen.’
‘Just because you wouldn’t know romance if it came and bit you, that doesn’t mean other people don’t do romantic things.’ She flounced off to find something to put the flowers in.
‘Okay then, let’s see what we’ve got.’ Anna turned the laptop so that she could see it. ‘Is that all twelve?’
It was early Sunday evening and they were in the flat, looking through the images for the calendar. The idea had been to hand them straight over to Lara, but Anna had wanted them to all to have a look at them together.
Anna flicked through the pictures and Beth and Lara moved closer so that they could all see the screen. Beth hoped that the calendar would take Lara’s mind off Chris for a bit, at least. Beth had spent the previous night at Lara’s house, keeping her company, and later that evening Lara was going to meet another friend. Which was a good thing, because otherwise Beth would feel the need to call and check on her, which she knew wouldn’t go down well with Gordon.
‘Wow,’ said Lara, who was seeing some of the photos for the first time. ‘Beth, you’re really good. They look very professional.’
‘Thanks.’ Beth felt a warm buzz from having her work admired. She’d been taking photos on and off for years, but had never really shown people, in case she was deluding herself about her skill. It was nice to see her work admired by others. The satisfaction of being good at something was wonderful.
Even better, Gordon was supportive of her hobby this time. Perhaps he finally understood how important it was to her. She wondered what had prompted the change. Maybe she’d been more passionate when she talked about it this time around. Last year, she had been too wrapped up in Gordon to be passionate about much else. She smiled to herself. It was nice being connected to her hobby again. It made her feel more complete.
‘They all look great, but I think we might need to move them around a little bit,’ said Anna, leaning back in her seat.
‘Why?’ Beth had spent a long time getting the pictures edited and put into a sensible order. ‘What’s wrong with them?’
Anna looked up. ‘Nothing. The pictures are brilliant. Relax.’ She gestured to the laptop. ‘I just thought we might need to change the order.’
‘Oh. Right.’ So long as the pictures were okay, she needed this discussion to be over really soon so that she could get on with making the salad for Gordon’s special meal.
Anna was watching Beth carefully. ‘You okay?’
‘Yes. Fine. I just need to get on with making dinner, that’s all.’
‘For Gordon?’ Anna shot a glance at Lara, whose mouth tightened, as though she was stopping herself from speaking.
‘What?’
‘Nothing,’ Lara said.
‘We’re just surprised that you haven’t suggested we put Gordon in the calendar, that’s all,’ said Anna.
‘We’d already decided the line-up before he came back.’ Beth was surprised at Anna’s tone of voice. Clearly Hibs had been feeding Anna his bad opinion of Gordon. She wished Anna would bother to form her own opinions rather than regurgitating Hibs’s.
‘I wouldn’t have put it past him to ask for someone else to be dropped off the list so that he could go on,’ said Lara.
Gordon had asked her to do just that. Beth felt a disloyal stab of annoyance. ‘He knows I would never do that,’ she said. ‘So he wouldn’t ask.’ Okay, so he’d asked. But it was probably a joke. That didn’t count. ‘Let’s just get on with this. What do you want to change?’
‘I think the beetle man should be Dr January.’ Anna scrolled up to the photo. ‘This photo is brilliant. It shows a gorgeous man who looks like an action hero – and he’s a brilliant scientist. What could be a better advert for the calendar?’
Lara stared at the photo. ‘You’re right,’ she said. ‘That is a pretty impressive front page.’
Anna flicked back to the naked guy, whom Beth had originally chosen to be Dr January. ‘Also, I’m not sure we should give this guy’s ego any more fodder than strictly necessary.’
Beth shrugged. ‘Fair enough.’
‘Agreed?’ Anna looked at Lara, who nodded.
‘Great.’ Anna selected the next photo. ‘This is a great photo too. Very happy and sunshiny.’ She indicated a picture taken in the plant biology department. A man stood in the dappled sunlight, his eyes creasing with laughter. Beth remembered that he and Anna had got on really well and Beth had been sure that Anna would try and get his number, until he’d casually thrown in a comment about his boyfriend. ‘I think we should keep this one for Dr December. It’ll be a nice happy note to end on.’
‘I think it works as Dr June,’ said Beth.
They moved the pictures around until they had a line-up that they agreed on, and then had a final flick through.
‘That’s quite a good effort,’ said Lara. ‘Well done, girls. I’ll drop them round to the printers next week.’
‘Beth did all the difficult bits,’ said Anna. ‘I just asked them questions. They were only too happy to talk about themselves.’
Lara nodded. ‘And how many of them did you ask out in the end?’
‘None,’ said Anna. ‘I got a few numbers, but I got together with Hibs. So …’ She smiled, almost to herself.
Beth hadn’t had chance to tell Anna what had happened. She glanced at Lara and caught the cloud of sadness that passed across her face.
The doorbell rang.
‘That’ll be Hibs.’ Anna leapt up. ‘I’ll get it.’
‘Is Hibs coming here?’ Beth didn’t know why she was surprised. It was his night off – he would want to spend it with his girlfriend. She and he had been avoiding each other since their argument at the lab meeting. They still spoke, but only if it was essential to keeping the experiments running. The atmosphere in the lab had been ten
se.
The doorbell rang again, a bit longer this time. Anna went to get it.
‘Are you going to be okay?’ Beth whispered to Lara.
Lara nodded. ‘I’ve done some thinking. It’s hard, but I think I did the right thing.’
Hibs sauntered in and Anna rushed off to have a shower and get ready.
‘Lara,’ Hibs said, spotting her. ‘How are you?’
‘I’m fine thanks. You?’
‘Pretty good.’ He glanced at Beth and slid into a seat. Beth looked away. ‘How’s The Man?’ he said to Lara.
Beth shot a warning glare at him. Lara looked like she was about to cry.
Hibs frowned. ‘What’s wrong? Is everything okay?’
Lara stood up. ‘Excuse me.’ Then she ran off to the bathroom.
‘What’s going on? Is Lara okay?’ Hibs finally made eye contact with Beth. This was the first time since her flowers had arrived that he’d spoken to her about something not related to work and she felt a flutter of relief in her chest. She quickly outlined what was happening.
‘Ouch,’ said Hibs.
‘Yeah. She had to do something about it. She couldn’t carry on being trapped in that relationship. It was ruining her life.’
‘You’re a fine one to talk,’ said Hibs.
‘Oh for heaven’s sake, Hibs. Grow up.’
He stuck his tongue out at her, proving he was anything but grown up. She turned away from him, annoyed. For a moment, neither she nor Hibs said anything. Just when it looked like they were going to remain that way until Anna or Lara came back, Hibs sighed and Beth looked round.
‘You’re right,’ he said. ‘This is ridiculous. I’m sorry, Tyler. I was out of line.’
Beth stared at him. Was he really admitting that he’d been wrong? Really? Did men do that?
‘What you do in your private life is your business,’ Hibs continued. ‘You’re normally very diligent with your work and just because you were late for one meeting that doesn’t mean you’re not dedicated. I overreacted.’
