The Sweet Tooth

by Margot Larson

  Montparnasse Café was an out-of-the-way place the tourists hadn’t discovered yet a couple of blocks off High Street. It was cozy with just a few small, round, marble-topped café tables standing on top of the dark, hardwood floors. A cushion-topped bench lined the back wall, under a wide window and bookcases fit snuggly in each corner. The display case and order counter were inside the front door to the right and a chalkboard listing the menu and daily specials hung on the wall to the left.

  The duo had a brief wait before a table became free so Solomon eyed the assortment of goodies in the display case. He asked Anders to remind him to take something home to Mathieu. While they waited at the counter for a table they browsed the menu board and placed their order; a chicken Panini for Solomon with avocado, sweet corn, emmenthal cheese and chili mayo; a ‘four season salad’, mixed greens, avocado, cucumber, tomato, carrots, sweet corn and tapenade for Anders.

  Solomon knew why they were there without Mathieu but he was willing to let Anders bring it up in his own time. Solomon knew that if his behavior didn’t change he was risking losing Mathieu and that was the last thing he wanted but waiting for a table was beginning to annoy him. He kept doing his deep breathing exercises and telling himself to keep calm. “Can’t these people see that others are waiting for a table?” Solomon grumbled to Anders as he pointed to a couple at a table by the left bookcase, “They’ve been done eating for 10 minutes. If they’re going to sit there and yap they should have to order something else.”

  Anders slapped Solomon’s pointing hand, “Shush. What’s your hurry, got a date? If we can’t get a table we’ll take the food and go to the gardens and find a bench or something.” Solomon shushed but Anders could tell his friend was not happy.

  The couple at the table by the bookcase finally left and Anders and Solomon were able to sit. Anders’ been trying to decide on whether to bring up Solomon’s little problem before they eat, while they eat or after they eat. It was too late to bring it up before they ate when the waitress brings over their order. They talked about current events, movies, food and the weather. Anders was satisfied that none of those topics are what were bothering Solomon; he never actually thought they were. The restaurateur wants to bring up their other friend but realized a crowded café was not the place to do it.

  Soon, they were done eating, Solomon got a couple of chocolate croissants for Mathieu and Anders still hadn’t directly brought up Solomon’s problem. He suggested a walk in the gardens instead of going to the movies. Once they found a relatively quiet area with an unoccupied bench Anders finally had the opportunity to talk, “So,” Anders had time and space to talk but he wasn't exactly sure how to bring it up, “you okay lately?”

  Solomon was more than willing to watch his friend squirm for a few minutes, “Yeah, fine. Thank you. You?”

  Anders rubbed the back of his neck, “Good, yeah. Umm….How’s Mathieu?”

  “He was fine when I left this morning. He put me through his killer workout routine yesterday. I’m surprised I can move today.”

  “Oh, that’s nice. Tough was it?”

  “Yeah.”

  “That’s nice. You two have to come by the restaurant and see the collages.”

  “Mathieu showed me the pictures you emailed him. They look great. I can’t wait to see them in person.”

  “Yeah, you should stop by.”

  “We will, maybe next week.”

  “Good. Good.” Anders went back to rubbing his neck.

  Even though Solomon was loving every second of Anders’ discomfort he decided to give his friend a helping hand, “I get the feeling there’s something you want to talk to me about.”

  “Well……I wanted to see if there was anything I could do to help you.”

  Solomon teased, “Help me what?”

  “Look, Solomon, I know you’re having a hard time with something and I wanted to know if you wanted to talk about it.”

  “You want to be my therapist?”

  “No, Solomon. I want to be your friend. I want you to know that I’m here for you if you want to talk.”

  “Talk? We’ve been talking all morning,” Solomon could feel the heat rising inside him.

  “We’ve been talking about nothing. I’ve known you for a long time and this…this way you’ve been behaving; it isn’t like you. You’re always so laid back and collected. Nothing ever seems to upset you. I mean if you seriously want to talk about whatever it is that’s been bothering you I will listen.”

  Solomon turned away from Anders, closed his eyes and began his deep breathing exercises. He calmed easily because he had stopped the argument before it began. “Anders, I appreciate your offer but there’s nothing to talk about. I’m just going through some sort of phase. I’m sure I’ll be back to normal soon.”

  Anders was still unsure about this whole conversation and even though he didn’t believe a word of what his friend just said he put on his best fake smile and patted his friend on the back, “I’m sure you will.”

  ***

  Solomon trudged up the stairs to the flats. Trying not to argue with Anders drained him and all he wanted to do was cuddle on the sofa with his partner. Mathieu’s door was closed so Solomon used his key to let himself in. “Mathieu,” Solomon called but there was no response. He checked the bathroom and the bedroom but the artist wasn’t home. Solomon entered his own flat but Mathieu wasn’t in there either. Solomon checked his mobile but there weren’t any texts or missed calls. Solomon tried to call his partner but the call went to voicemail; he sent a text (‘Where r u?’) and as he waited for a response he went back to the other flat to search for a note. There was nothing on the coffee table or kitchen counter; taped to the fridge or the bathroom mirror. He checked his flat for a note but didn’t find one there either. Solomon took his mobile out again and called Anders, “Have you heard from Mathieu? Do you know where he is?”

  “I haven’t heard from him. He’s not home?” Anders was concerned, he knew it was not like Mathieu to go wandering off without a word.

  Solomon bit out, “If he were home I wouldn’t be calling you,” and before Anders could say another work Solomon ended the call. He was almost pulling his hair out with worry when he heard those sound of running footsteps on the stairs.

  Mathieu smiled as he practically ran up the stairs, his new artist’s carry-all bag slung over his shoulder. He wanted to be home to greet Solomon when he got back from the movies and show him the new sketches he did that morning in the park. Mathieu’s happiness was short-lived when he realized Solomon was already home and standing on the landing glaring at him. “Oh, you’re home early. How was brunch?”

  Solomon’s expression didn’t change when he saw Mathieu’s smiling face, “Where the hell have you been? I’ve been worried sick. You don’t return my call or answer my text. I was about to call the hospital to see if you were there again.”

  “I was at the little park across the street sketching. I found a little space hidden behind some bushes where I could people-watch without them seeing me. I was listening to my iPod. I guess I didn’t hear the phone. I’m sorry.” Mathieu had been so proud of himself; going out alone for the first time. He thought it would be a happy surprise for Solomon and they could celebrate together.

  “Why didn’t you tell me where you were going?! You could’ve left a note or something! Don’t you think I deserved that much! What were you thinking?! I bet you weren’t thinking about me at all were you! I bet you weren’t thinking at all!” Solomon was yelling in his frustration and fear; hands clenched into fists at his side.

  Mathieu shrank into himself under Solomon’s barrage, “I wanted to surprise you with what I accomplished today. I thought I’d be home before you and you’d come home and I’d show you the sketches and you’d be happy for me and we could celebrate.” Mathieu took his sketchpad out of his new bag and held it out to his partner.

  Solomon grabbed the sketchpad and flung it across the hall like a frisbee. “I don’t care about you
r sketches! I was worried sick about you! Why didn’t you tell me where you were going?!”

  Mathieu became afraid as he watched his sketchpad hit the far wall and he slowly backed into his flat almost tripping over the book propping open the door. “I wanted to surprise you. I thought you’d be happy for me.”

  Solomon stepped forward into Mathieu’s personal space, “You went out without me! What if you had an attack?! You were alone! And you were in a place where nobody could see you! You could’ve been lying there for hours and I wouldn’t know where you were or that you needed help. Jesus, Mathieu, weren’t you thinking at all today?!”

  Even though he was afraid and tears were starting to well up in his eyes Mathieu decided to try something Elise said so he reached out to touch Solomon on the arm. He kept his voice as controlled and calm as possible, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you where I was going. I thought I would be here when you got back. I won’t go out without telling you where I’m going or having somebody with me.” He had to refrain from telling Solomon to calm down like Anders did last week knowing it would only make Solomon more upset.

  Mathieu could feel the heat radiating from his partner but he went half a step forward anyway and put his other arm round Solomon’s shoulders drawing him into an embrace. Solomon tensed at first when his anger wanted to take over and push the other man away but he heard Mathieu sniffle back a sob and he finally realized how he had been behaving. Solomon went limp in his partner’s arms and Mathieu barely had enough time to get them both to the sofa before the blonde broke down into hysterical sobs.

  The Irishman didn’t understand Solomon’s muffled, “I left your croissants on the garden bench,” he just kept rubbing his hand over his partner’s back.

  CHAPTER 21

  The next few days continued much the same way except Solomon had been attempting to control his temper better. He was doing more deep breathing exercises and taking his time to calm down before answering questions that would upset him. Mathieu had been gently bringing up private sessions with Elise but every time he did Solomon walked away. That was how Solomon had been handling things that bother him with Mathieu; walking away. If they were in Mathieu’s he’d go back to his; if they were in his he’d go outside. He knew his partner would give him his space and wouldn’t follow. To Mathieu it seemed like they’d been spending more time apart than together.

  Wednesday evening Mathieu and Solomon had dinner together at Mathieu’s before setting off for their appointment with Elise. It was a quiet affair because each man was caught up in his own thoughts about the upcoming session. Mathieu wanted to bring up Sunday because he knew that for therapy to work he had to be honest with Elise but he was afraid Solomon wouldn’t like it, get mad and leave. Solomon didn’t really want to talk about anything. He wouldn’t even go but he promised and he always kept his promises (or so he told himself). They took a cab to the office because it was quicker and Solomon thought the faster they got there the faster they could leave. He wasn't looking forward to it but he promised Mathieu so he went.

  When they walked into the reception area the desk was unoccupied but the session area door was open. Solomon stuck his head through the door but Elise wasn’t in the room. Solomon motioned for Mathieu to take a seat. Solomon sat next to him, mindful of the observation Elise made last week regarding their physical closeness. He tried to take Mathieu’s hand but the younger man flinched a little but after a heartbeat gave his hand to his partner with a smile. Mathieu had tried to have as much physical contact with his partner as he could but it was hard to do when said partner kept walking away every time he was a little upset.

  Mathieu gave the hand in his a squeeze, “You know I love you, right?”

  “I know. I love you too,” Solomon squeezed back and raised the brunette’s hand to his lips.

  Elise called the two into the session area to begin. Even though the two were sitting close together on the sofa and holding hands her training and years of experience told her that there was tension between them. Solomon was sitting arrow straight and breathing heavy; looking straight ahead, not making eye contact with her when she said ‘hello’. While Mathieu was slouched and seemed to barely breathe at all; he bit the nails on his free hand and looked a little startled when she spoke to him.

  She started the session like she normally did, asking Mathieu how his week had been. He didn’t want to upset Solomon so told her that everything was fine and good.

  “Have you been out on your own yet?”

  “I went out for a little bit on Sunday.”

  The doctor praised and congratulated him on his accomplishment before turning her attention to Solomon to get his opinion, “What did you think about Mathieu’s step forward, Solomon?”

  Solomon looked at the doctor but answered stiffly, “I’m very proud of him.”

  “Tell me what you did, Mathieu.”

  “I…um…,” Mathieu made a few furtive glances at Solomon and took his hand out of his partners, “I went to the little park across the street to sketch.”

  “That’s wonderful. Did you have any symptoms?”

  Mathieu folded his hands in his lap, “No.”

  “What’s wrong? What you did was a huge step forward. You should be very proud of yourself.” Elise could see Mathieu crumbling and Solomon becoming tenser, “Solomon, don’t you think Mathieu should be proud of himself?”

  “Yeah, he should be really proud,” Solomon’s voice was dripping with sarcasm.

  “Why did you say it like that? You don’t think he should be proud of himself?”

  “You don’t know the whole story.”

  “Okay, tell me the whole story.”

  Solomon glanced at his cowering partner then returned his attention to the doctor. Solomon counted off Mathieu’s transgressions on his fingers, “One; he went alone. Two; he didn’t tell me he was going. Three; he hid himself behind some shrubs so people couldn’t see him. Four; he didn’t answer my call or text.” He held four fingers in Mathieu’s face. “I was worried sick. What if you had an attack and needed help? I didn’t know where you were.”

  Tears rolled down the Irishman’s face as he pushed away the accusatory fingers, “I said I was sorry. I promised I wouldn’t do it again. I really thought I’d be back before you. How many times do I have to promise that I won’t do it again?”

  Elise made notes while the two men calmed themselves down. Mathieu tried to control his sobs and fight back tears while Solomon did his deep breathing. When she deemed them significantly calmer she asked, “Which part upset you more Solomon, the part where you didn’t know where he was or the part where he went out without you?”

  “It all upset me.”

  “Are you comfortable with Mathieu’s going out alone?”

  “Not really,” Solomon frowned.

  “Have you thought about Mathieu going out to work or to the store alone?”

  “No.”

  “You’re concerned something will happen to him?”

  “Of course.”

  “Would you have him stay home then?”

  “No, I want him to be able to go out.”

  “But not alone?”

  “Yes…uh, no. Do we have to keep talking about me?” Solomon had had enough and if it weren’t for Mathieu sitting next to him he’d get up and leave.

  “No, we don’t.” The doctor flipped to a clean page in her notebook, “Mathieu, will you be going out again?”

  Mathieu frowned, “I don’t think so.”

  “That’s very sad to hear. You’ve come such a long way. Do you want to stop the medication?”

  Mathieu wiped away a tear, “No. I want to go out.”

  Elise waited to see if either man would continue on his own. She didn’t have to wait long when Solomon sighed, “I want you to go out, Baby. I just want you to be safe.”

  Mathieu put a hand on his partner’s thigh, “I know. I promise I won’t go anywhere without telling you first or having you with me. I told you, I’
d do anything for you to be happy again.”

  Silence fell and again Elise waited. When Solomon looked up again he had tears in his eyes, “I’m really sorry for the way I’ve been acting towards you these past few weeks. You don’t deserve it. You’re so good to me.”

  “You’re good to me too. I love you,” Mathieu caressed the blonde’s thigh.

  Solomon sobbed audibly and turned to bury his head against the Irishman’s shoulder, “Don’t leave me.”

  “I won’t leave you. We’ll get through this rough patch, you’ll see.”

  “Solomon, do you think when Mathieu is able to go out on his own he will look for somebody else because of the way you’ve been treating him lately?”

  “When he finds out he will.”

  “When he finds out what?”

  Solomon whispers, “I lost it all.”

  Mathieu held his partner closer, “You lost something? What did you lose?”

  “Everything.”

  “I don’t understand.”

  “Most of my money and Anders’ and Adrian’s. It’s gone. I lost it.”

  “What happened?” Elise passed a fresh box of tissues to Mathieu and he held it out to Solomon.

  Solomon sniffled, took a few tissues and wiped his face, “Me and a couple of other guys in the office invested funds in a new corporation. Everything looked good on paper. They had all the right documents with all the correct signatures. We did background checks and everybody passed. The numbers added up and it looked so good. We went with it. I invested most of our capitol and for weeks the profits were coming in but then one morning it was all gone. No explanation, nobody answered our calls or emails, nothing. They just vanished with our money.”

  Elise pushed her glasses up her nose, “Is there an investigation taking place?”

  “Yes but who knows how long it will take or if they’ll even find these people. They’re long gone with our money. And even if we could track them down and take them to court who knows how much money we’d get back, if any.”

  Mathieu watched as Solomon seemed to shrink before his eyes with his confession, “Anders and Adrian don’t know yet, do they?”