I’ve never been one of those people who says ‘time flies’ because for me, it’s always been slow as molasses. And that’s fine by me. I like slow. I never want anything to go too quickly. Love, sex, moments, all of it.
Logan knows this better than anyone. When we were lying out in his daddy’s cow pasture, we kissed forever, and then we took even longer to take off all our clothes, and then when we made love it was just…forever never felt so good. I think people rush love. I think there’s a real art to taking your time, and letting each moment count. And when I’m with Logan like that, out in our hometown, and it’s just the two of us, it’s like we rule the world and nobody else matters.
Then, the next day, I went on another date with Tedi, and I don’t even know why, but I guess we’re exclusive now.
I can hardly look up. “I know we need this for some reason, but I think I should stop.”
“I forgot about Tedi.” Logan’s voice is quiet and sounds far calmer than my racing heart.
I slam the diary shut. “I forgot about Annette.”
We stare at each other.
And then I stand up. “I have to go to dress rehearsal at the theater.”
“The play’s tomorrow night?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll be there.”
“Great.” If I don’t get out of here right this second, I’m going to say something I shouldn’t. “Feel better. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
My mind won’t stop racing as I leave Logan’s bedroom.
Because that entry I just read…
I can’t believe I let Tedi into my bed. A man I never even cared about. A man I hardly even remember.
The only man I never let in was Logan. Because he’s the only one who could have…
Made me change my mind.
I rush out of the main house of Wild Ranch as fast as I can. But as I reach the edge of the front pasture, the glint of light off to the side catches my eye. I turn just in time to see Skip with his cell phone held up in my direction.
Did he just…
I shake my head and keep walking toward the theater.
Chapter Five
When Mama proudly presents me with my Small Woman costume at our final dress rehearsal, I gasp when I glimpse the neon yellow top and the bright red bottom.
She screams back that it’s a beautiful dress. I tell her I’m going to look like a small bug in it, and she tells me not to speak so rudely.
“I did not raise you to talk that way, young lady,” she says with a pointed stare. “Now put on the dress and let’s take a look.”
It’s just as I suspected. I look like a cross between an ant and a bumblebee.
“That is not true,” Mama says.
“Billowy red skirt, skimpy black and gold striped top. Ant and bumblebee, Mama.”
After a few alterations, it’s no better. Mama skulks away, muttering something about Small Woman being beautiful, and I sigh.
When I get up on the stage to rehearse, I forget my lines. Millie, the director, admonishes me that tomorrow is opening night, there will be a full house, and I better not forget then. I apologize as Mama brings out the script to me with a glare.
“I told you,” I say to the leper now-turned beauty. “I told you he’d love you anyway. He always has, and it’s not the looks. It’s what’s inside you.”
Right, it’s not the looks. Why would the whole play be based around how she’s improved her external appearance if it doesn’t matter?
Mama frowns at me when I tell her this. She tells me to go home and get some sleep, saying I clearly need it.
So I drive home, feeling lonely, feeling sad, and cursing Queen Austen and the fact that I agreed to be in it.
My phone rings as I’m pulling into my driveway.
“Macey!” Mrs. Rattles sounds out of breath and raspy.
“Are you all right? You sound sick.”
“Just a small case of pneumonia. Nothing that a few pills won’t fix.”
“Pneumonia! Shouldn’t you be in bed?”
Now that most of the wedding pieces are in place, Mrs. Rattles has surged back into the forefront, not wanting to be left out.
“There’s no time for bed when my daughter’s about to get hitched!” Mrs. Rattles enters into a coughing fit that lasts for over a minute. I know because I’m staring at the clock on my dashboard.
“I’m fine, really,” she says finally. “Now, the wedding’s just over a week away. In terms of the flowers…”
“Gin told me about them being short on daffodils. Not a problem. I’ll stop by the store later and pick out…”
“Unbelievable, these people,” she says, cutting me off. “They don’t know anything, do they? I bet Gigi isn’t having our problems!”
I’m sure she’s not.
I go inside and deal with the flowers. And I write.
But I toss and turn all night.
When I wake up the next morning, I’ve got dark circles under my eyes. Just the look I’m going for when I get up on stage tonight. Luckily, Riley’s agreed to do my makeup beforehand.
I sit at my desk in the liquor room with my laptop in front of me all morning and write my novel.
I’m trying not to be nervous. But I am nervous even though I only have a couple of lines. Mama’s terrified I’m going to humiliate her even though she’s never said as much out loud. And I don’t want to let her down.
As I walk into Hair ‘N Nails, I realize I’m the last one here.
Mama waves at me wildly. “Mace! Over here, baby!”
Riley’s sitting at Mama’s feet, giving her a pedicure, and Freedom has her face buried in a magazine while Riley’s colleague, Trudy, paints Free’s fingernails.
I kiss Riley on the head as I pass her. “What’s up?”
“Nothin’ new. Wink’s still an asshole.”
Mama holds up the book she’s reading.
“Sense and Sensibility?” I nod. “Good choice.”
“This one took us forever to get through, Mace. Do you remember?”
Oh, I think so.
I was thirteen, and Daddy was gone. My reading sessions with Mama went off course when I said I preferred Eleanor, and Mama said she just loved Marianne. I kept thinking Marianne reminded me of someone, but I couldn’t quite place who. I knew it was someone irrational and romantic in a nonsensical way.
Mama was so excited to help me solve the mystery that she kept guessing different girls in my class. I said no to all of them. All I knew is it was someone that gets under my skin in the worst way and who has no thought for anyone else. With a gasp, I realized she reminded me of Mama.
Mama was so mad she stormed off and refused to let us finish the book.
We couldn’t touch it for three whole months. Of course, she wouldn’t return the book to the library either, so by the time she forgave me and begrudgingly let me convince her that Marianne’s good traits of spunkiness and passion outweighed her negative ones, we owed the Darcy Public Library over forty dollars in late fees.
But that’s what Mama got for holding a grudge against her own daughter.
I nod at Mama now. “Yes, but we finally finished it, didn’t we?”
Free grabs her hand away from Trudy impatiently. “I’m done.”
“Not yet you’re not.” Trudy takes her hand back. “Five more minutes.”
Mama twists to face me, and I admire her lipstick and mascara.
“Mama, your makeup looks great. Riles, you did a nice job.”
A hell of a lot better than Mama’s makeup usually looks.
“Didn’t she?” Mama beams.
Riley looks like she’s wondering why she invited us here in the first place. She stands up and wipes her hands. “All set, Mama! You look gorgeous.”
Mama exhales. “Mace, you take my seat, honey. I’m going to grab a coffee and be right back.”
I sit down and take off my sandals. “Will the nail polish last until Gin’s wedding?”
“Of course,” R
iley says. “If it happens not to, come in again day before or something.”
Mama pauses on her way out the door. “Oh, Mace, what are you doing for your birthday this year? Anything special?”
“Just trying to get my best girlfriend down the aisle. A happy Ginny is really all I want this year.”
“You sure about that?” Riley says to me.
“Absolutely.”
Free turns to Riley once Mama’s gone. “So are you going to keep calling Wink or what? I think you need to move on from that cheating asshole. He dumped you, remember?”
Riley glares at her. “You don’t understand.”
“Why don’t I?”
Riley’s face contorts like she’s not sure why not, and she answers with, “You’re too young.”
“Right.” Free goes back to her magazine, but she looks up again a moment later. “I understand he’s a dick who’s probably screwing some other girl right now. And that’s not enough to never speak to him again?”
Riley stands up, grabs the magazine out of Free’s hands, and marches off to the back office. A door slams.
“Maybe she’s just tired,” Trudy says. “Macey, I’ll do your makeup—I’m all done over here.”
Chapter Six
I’m late leaving my house for the theater, and Mama’s already called once when my phone rings again.
“Mace?”
“Hey, what’s up, Gin?”
“I still feel bad I got nowhere with Luke yesterday. He’s like a steel trap, that one.”
“I know. Don’t worry at all. If Logan has a secret, we’ll find out eventually.”
“I hope so.” She sniffles.
“Gin? Something wrong?”
She sighs. “Dave and I fought all day, and now he’s gone. I’m thinking of calling Nickel. The baby’s started kicking, and I’m feeling so lonely. I need you to stop me like maiden of honors are supposed to do.”
I turn my car around and head for her house six blocks away.
“I only have a sec, honey. With the play…”
“I have Nickel on speed dial.”
“I’m nearly there. Hold on.”
I peel into her driveway, barely stopping to turn off the car. I’m halfway up her front steps when my phone rings.
“Macey, I need you here ten minutes ago,” Mama barks at me. “That dress needs a final alteration and…”
“Be there in five.” I hang up and give Ginny a hug.
“Your play,” Ginny says. “I don’t want you to be late.”
“I have five minutes, so listen.” I sit down on her couch. “Come with me to the theater. I’ll fix you up in the front row. It’s really a quite interesting play, about Jane Austen and a leper…”
“Dave saw my electric guitar,” Ginny says. “He doesn’t understand why I want it. He thinks I’m trying to throw it in his face. You know how his mother made him take guitar as a kid and he got so traumatized. But I pushed back this time, because it’s not fair. I mean, Nickel and I talked the other night about what kind of music we like, and he invited me to come play with his band sometime. He even told me about a band he knows who are looking for a female guitarist—they do this gig every Wednesday in San Antonio, and they’re having auditions in the fall. I know I’ll be as big as a house by then, so the timing may be off, but the point is that there are bands I could join. I could even start my own!”
My phone rings again. I pick it up without saying hello.
“Mace, I’m not kidding around,” Mama warns me. “I want you here right now, do you hear me?”
“Two minutes.” I hang up, but as soon as I do, it rings again.
“Now it’s your mother,” I whisper to Ginny as I answer.
“The reception hall is trying to mess with me,” Mrs. Rattles coughs into the phone. “I told them I had been ill. I went down there today myself to prove it to them, and they…”
I hand Ginny some tissues out of my purse as I listen to her mother vent. As soon as there’s an opening, I tell her I’ll look into the hall and how it’s possibly trying to cheat her and hang up.
Then, I drag Ginny with me to the theater.
“I personally think Nickel’s cute and nice,” I say. “I honestly do. And I know you have music in common. But that’s just one subject. I mean, Dave has known you your entire life! That’s so special.”
“We’re not like you and Logan, Macey,” Ginny says suddenly.
“I know that. You’re engaged to each other. You’re in love.”
“I mean we’re not like you guys in all the good ways. The way you two look out for each other. When it comes to what’s important, it seems like Logan’s always there for you. And you for him.”
I look over at her sharply.
“I honestly can’t say the same for me and Dave.”
“You can back out, honey,” I say. “Logan and I have both told you we’re on your side.”
“You don’t think I’m just scared? My sister says I’m just not sure I only want to kiss one man for the rest of my life. She says I just think being with someone else would be easier. Like a last hurrah, so to speak.”
“Is that what you think it is?” I say.
“I don’t know. I actually like Nickel,” she says. “And I feel sorry for Jane Austen’s ghost. For the first time, I actually feel sorry for her. Trapped and miserable and unable to be with her true love.”
Luckily, we’re in the theater parking lot, so I don’t have to answer her. How do I support Ginny and play the good maiden of honor like she’s asked me to? I’m not sure it’s possible.
As we rush in through the doors, we run straight into Logan, Gigi, and Blake.
“Hey, Small Woman!” Blake yells out as I try to scoot past them. “I’m trying to remember your last stage debut—how did that go again?”
“Not now,” I warn him.
I push Ginny toward her seat and wave goodbye.
But Logan follows me down the hall and into the dressing room where Mama accosts me as soon as she spots me.
“Where in God’s grace have you been?” She throws her arms in the air. “I’ve been waiting on you for the past forty-five minutes! Let’s get you into your costume—the alterations will have to be skipped. Hi, honey.” She gives Logan a kiss. “So good to see you back on your feet. Get a good seat because my daughter is going to be just fabulous tonight!”
Logan wishes me luck. “I’m sorry about yesterday.”
I shift my head so I can meet his serious gaze with my own. “I’m the one who read it. That entry just made me think.” I give him a light shove. “You better go or Mama will try to drag you on stage, too.”
Mama’s in the first scene, of course, which starts about five minutes after I arrive. She races backstage afterward, flushed and smiling.
“Great energy out there!” she beams at me. “Nothing like opening night.”
When it’s time for my big moment, nearly at the end of the entire script, Mama actually comes up behind me and shoves me onto the stage. I stumble forward and am out in the center of the stage before I can right myself and stand up straight. I look up and out at the audience just as Mama instructed me, and I try to keep my voice clear and steady as I deliver my lines.
“I told you he’d love you anyway. He always has, and it’s not the looks, it’s what’s inside you.”
Logan has always liked me for exactly who I am—a flawed, well-meaning woman who’s trying her best to be happy in this screwed-up world.
But since he got engaged to Gigi, I’ve felt insecure. And that’s not right. I deserve to carry myself with strength and pride. I shouldn’t wither just because Logan chose another woman.
As I stand tall on Darcy’s small-town stage, I vow that starting now, I’m going to have a happy rest of the summer regardless of what Logan and Gigi do.
We all come out for curtain calls at the end, and I bow, feeling sick to my stomach. I never ate dinner, and I’m nauseous from all the adrenaline. Being an actress is h
ard work, I tell Mama afterward. Don’t I know it, baby, she says as she wipes her brow. Daddy comes backstage with a bouquet of flowers for Mama and one for me, and Riley, Ben, and Free give us each a rose.
And then, I go home and blissfully fall into a deep sleep.
Chapter Seven
Logan
I’m doing the new normal for me—hanging out alone in my parents’ house—when Luke texts.
How are things going?
Good, I type back. How was your drive back?
Not quite there yet. Will be by tonight.
I watch the dots jump around on my screen before he adds—
Don’t bend on your plan. You’re nearly there.
Right. Luke may feel like I’m nearly there, but to me, the time spent being fake engaged to Gigi is interminable. My dream career may be taking off, but my personal life is stuck in neutral.
Another text comes in, this one from Blake.
Dude, I’m with Dave, and we’re heading to the lake. Let’s grab the girls and fish. No excuses. And Macey’s coming even if we have to drag her there.
Macey
Just after seven, I get a knock on my door.
When I go see who it is, Logan, Blake, and Dave are standing on my step. They’re dressed in t-shirts and ripped jeans, and all three are grinning.
“Looking good up on stage last night, Mace,” Dave teases.
“Ha, ha.”
“I thought your two lines showed great promise,” Blake says.
“Screw off, okay? I’m really not in the mood.”
But I open the door wide and let them all inside.
“What are y’all up to?” I say suspiciously. “Logan’s still recovering.”
“I’m doing better,” Logan says. “We’re going to the creek for a bit. Fish, light a fire, have a barbecue. We need your culinary skills.”
“You’ve got Blake for that.”
“The barbecue needs a woman’s touch, and you’re the best cook we know. Other than me,” Blake adds confidently.
Wild Girl: A Cowboy Romance Trilogy (Wild Men Texas Book 3) Page 3
