by Lyn Lowe
When he looked up, his eyes were hard again. “I know you won’t, Kaie. I know it. But they won’t listen to me. They won’t listen to your parents either. Not in this. You know it. Rosy, you can’t tell them. We’ll figure something out, some way to soften the Lemme’s words. But you can never speak of this. You have to forget it. We all have to forget it.”
“You would have him lie? That would be unforgivable. That would make them drive him out.” Amorette’s volume was back to its regular pitch, which was good. She was still rubbing at her thumbnail, though. He couldn’t help but think that was less good. “This must be his power. That’s all. He’s not a seer. This is just the old magics coming out, letting him see through the Lemme’s eyes or something. The family will find a way to accept it. They have to. After what she said, about him fulfilling the oath, they have to.”
He desperately wanted to believe Amorette. He wanted to go to his father, the Keeper of the Old World, and speak of everything that happened. If she was right he would know. It was his job to remember everything from the long ago and the old magics. Lodan would know if what he experienced was the power they already knew was in him. The whole tribe was waiting for that power to manifest. If Lodan told them that was all the images were, that Amorette was right, there would be no reason to fear Kosa. But he knew better. If she was wrong, if he was a seer, his father would be bound by oaths and duty to tell the tribe. Being his son, Lodan would hesitate. But in the end he would not be able to hide it.
And Sojun was right. The things the Lemme said, they separated him. There were no murders in the tribe, not in over four centuries. There were no armies to lead, no battles to be fought. The Zetowan tribe fought with their words and their faith. They only took lives of animals to feed the tribe, offering thanks to the spirit of the fallen after each kill. Any who wished it to be otherwise were not of the family. They were driven away to protect the peace and for the sake of the spirits of the people. Kaie didn’t want war, didn’t want death. But if there was a chance he was a seer, his wants would not be enough to change what was needed. They would drive him out.
With despair he dropped his gaze from Amorette. He loved her and wished her ferocity was enough to make her words true. But she was wrong and if he followed her path he would find himself alone the next time the Finders came to the woods.
“What do I do, Jun?”
Sojun hugged him hard enough to hurt. Kaie nearly took the excuse to sob, realizing that this might be the last gesture of kinship he would receive from anyone. Being the one destined for the oath meant nothing if he was not of the family.
“You will stay in your home, heart’s brother. You’ll think on your destiny. I will sit with you today. Together… together we’ll find the meaning that won’t turn the minds of the family to fear. And then tomorrow Amorette will sit with you. She’ll hear what we have found and will say it’s the truth of things.”
Meaning they would lie. On the morning of the third day, before the ceremony, Amorette and Sojun would be called separately to speak on what the Lemme foretold. Each was to give their understanding of her words. They were allowed to discuss it during the day they shared together but only for the purpose of helping him understand his destiny. They weren’t supposed to allow his interpretation to impact their own. What Sojun was suggesting was more than forbidden. There weren’t rules to cover such a thing. The Lemme’s visions were the foundation of the tribe. To alter them, even to soften them… It was unfathomable.
He looked back to Amorette. She wouldn’t agree to it. She couldn’t. She was always extreme in her reactions, but this was just crazy. He didn’t want her to agree. It was bad enough that his future was already changing Jun so much.
Her pale eyes flashed with emotions he couldn’t name. Her lips were pressed so tightly into a thin line they lost their color. She glanced over to Sojun, no doubt trying to figure out how they could both become so corrupted in such a short time. He waited for her to refuse, to shun them both as they deserved. Anyone who could harbor such thoughts could not be family.
Slowly, tears sliding down her cheek, Amorette nodded. Then, just like she was supposed to, she walked out the door. He and Sojun were alone for their day together.
Four
“I figure,” Sojun began as he helped Kaie gather wood from the pile his father left and arrange it in the fire pit, “the most important thing to speak on is the oath.”
Kaie pressed the dried grass in along the bottom of the pile, taking longer than was necessary as he sorted through his thoughts. “You shouldn’t be doing this. I shouldn’t let you. If you lie you and Amorette will be exiled too. You won’t be family either.”
Sojun’s easy smile didn’t look quite as convincing as usual. “There won’t be any driving off. We just have to sort out the right things to speak on and the right ways to say them. Then everything goes on like it’s supposed to.”
“Until the fires and the armies,” Kaie muttered. “It’s lying, Jun. The barbarians lie to family. We keep no secrets, harbor no dishonesty.”
“I know the words Kaie,” Sojun growled as he handed him the flint, not playing at happy and carefree anymore. “If you know another way, tell me. Love of the gods, tell me. The tribe is our family but it was you and Amorette that put me together again after mother left. Without the two of you, my family is broken. I won’t have that. Not again. So if it’s a choice between being a barbarian or saying goodbye, I will lie happily. So will Ams. And when we’re done, things will be right. Like I said, with the three of us together.”
Unbidden, the Lemme’s words sprang to his mind. All you love will know strife and death. How long would his friends stay by his side, when they were faced with nothing but sorrow for it? Had it started already? Maybe it was his fault that Jun’s mother left the family. Or maybe the Lemme was just an old, sick woman and her mind was leaving. Maybe his whole destiny was nothing more than the ravings of a dying woman.
He tried to believe that for all of a minute. He also tried to figure out some words that could touch on the depth of his gratitude or the guilt he felt for already ruining his friends, even if none of it was his doing. Not yet, at any rate. Not until the glimpses of his memories caught up with him. As he blew the sparks to life he gave the task up as impossible.
“I haven’t seen you this serious in years, Jun. It’s scarier than anything that old terror had to say. If you don’t crack a painful joke soon, I’m liable to start puking my stomach out all over again.”
The younger boy smiled but the expression didn’t touch his eyes. “I’m sorry. I think I used up all my wonderful jokes this morning.” Sojun sighed heavily. “Honest, Kaie, I can’t think of anything to laugh at in this. My sense of humor left at the thought of you seeing visions of ashes and dragons.”
“They weren’t visions,” he insisted, then sighed himself. “I know what you mean.”
Sojun nodded grimly. Kaie didn’t know if it was in acceptance of his non-visions or if it was just a general nod of acknowledgement of the whole horrible mess. “So. I need you to pull yourself together and help me think this through, Rosy. You’re the one who traded Delia for her own flowers. We’ll need that silver tongue to get through this.”
Kaie rolled his eyes. “That was ten years ago. And she only did it to keep me from crying.”
“Exactly,” Jun insisted. “You had her so convinced you were about to start sobbing I almost believed it. You know you’re good at making people think what you want them to. So quit obsessing about why we shouldn’t and start figuring out how we will.”
Despite everything, Kaie couldn’t help but to smile. That was a good day. And no matter how he denied it every other day, Jun was right. He was good at making people believe what he wanted without ever lying. “Alright. You’re right. The oath is the most important part.”
Sojun grinned and nodded. “We’ll leave of the part about ‘none and all and none again’ right? That sounds kind of ominous.”
He s
hook his head. “That’s good stuff. She flat out said I’m to lead the tribe there. If I’m supposed to marry a High Queen, they’ll expect me to lead.”
“But the ‘none’ part is kind of creepy.”
Kaie flexed his hands over the fire, wondering how awful it would be to have a summer birthing day. The fire was as much ritual as every other part of these days and, while he was lucky enough that the weather was starting to turn, it was still warm enough to make his home a bit stifling. How much worse would it be if it weren’t cool outside? “No, it makes sense. My mother leads now. Until she steps down, I lead no one. When someone else takes over for me, it will be no one again. It makes it sound like I’ll live a long time. Long enough to have an heir and step down, too.”
Sojun nodded, cracking his knuckles. “It does make sense. And sounds good. I guess I’m seeing phantoms when there’s just an old woman being cryptic.”
“I don’t think that’s what she was doing, Jun.”
The other boy pursed his lips. “Maybe not. But everyone else will. That’s all that matters.”
Kaie watch the fire growing to consume the wood they arranged. That was true enough but only if the Lemme said nothing about her visions. So far as he knew she didn’t tell anyone but the person involved. And the witnesses, of course. But that was when everyone was honest. There was no telling what she would do in this situation.
He needed to go back and see her. The thought made his stomach roll all over again in all kinds of uncomfortable ways. But there wasn’t any getting around it. If he was going to lie, to let his friends lie, he needed to be sure it wasn’t all for nothing. For all they knew, she saw their deceit coming and was already planning to tell the whole village.
Part of Sojun’s job today was to keep Kaie in his home. They all heard stories of people running away from an unwanted fate by escaping to the woods. The tribe didn’t hold anyone hostage. If that’s what he wanted, they would let him go. But, since those people invariably tried to return to the family after a day or two, it was understood that sometimes the future took some time to adjust to. That was why he was given two days. And his witnesses were supposed to ensure he didn’t do anything to hurt himself in the meantime. None of which mattered now, except that Sojun wouldn’t let Kaie run back to the Lemme. Not when there was a chance he would be seen, and certainly not alone.
He needed to wait until Sojun fell asleep before returning to her foul-smelling hut. He was going to ask her if he was a seer. She could tell him. And if she said no, there was no reason for the dishonesty at all. But if Jun was there with him Kaie knew he would lack the courage. He wouldn’t be able to face his friend, so eager to risk everything for his sake, if her answer was yes. Not knowing what Kosa would do to everyone who sheltered him.
But he didn’t want to think that. She was probably going to tell him he wasn’t a seer. They weren’t true visions, after all. Men saw directly. Not seas of blood or dragons setting the world ablaze.
When Fate, the goddess Lemme, first left her mark upon her descendants, there were men and women in equal numbers. They were tasked with leading the children of Elysium along the paths she envisioned for them.
But the genders perceived the future differently. Women saw in parables. Their glimpses of past and future were richer, could encompass far more possibilities, but they were cloaked in imagery that could take many years to sort out properly. Even then, only the gifted daughters could truly decipher what they saw. Men experienced no such troubles. While their sight was shorter than that of their sisters and mothers, they could see events the way they would unfold. Real death, real birth, real conversations. They were able to know exactly what was coming and often when. Because of the differences, the two genders drifted, neither finding much value in the way the other dealt with the future.
Then came the most gifted seer. His name, once forbidden, was now utterly lost. Not even Lodan could recall hearing of a single soul who knew it. His story remained as a warning to all that would follow in his shadow.
He was remarkable, able to see far longer and deeper than any man before him. As he grew into his ability he could surpass even the gifted daughters. And he was celebrated in every corner of Elysium for it. Until he saw Kosa, god of destruction, the one who would swallow the world on the last day.
Always before, the movements of the gods were hidden from mortal sight. The days when they warred over souls was ended. Each god held the Accord, limiting their interaction with their children and settling their disputes with their Guardians. But Kosa, who was always fond of trickery and lies, wasn’t content with waiting for the final days to reclaim the power he lost in the Accord. He began moving slowly, extending his influence by such small degrees that no one noticed. Even Lemme and her partner Maal never voiced concern over the web Kosa was weaving.
How the seer first realized it was also lost to history. But when he did, he did not wait to determine the best way to unhook Kosa’s claws from the mortal world. He acted, ripped them out with no thought to the damage done. He shared his visions with every male seer he could find. Together they undid all Kosa’s carefully crafted plans. In a single generation, nearly all of the god’s followers were dead. Those remaining were so deep in hiding that no one was ever certain what became of them.
Kosa was enraged. He moved to smite all seers from Elysium in an instant. Lemme was stirred to action, for she would never forget her children. She stood between Kosa and his vengeance, and she would not be moved. Turmoil raged in the abyss for a hundred years. The war that the Accord put an end to rose up again, pulling in the mortals as well. Soon all life was once more at the brink of extinction. Kosa, fat with his power, was preparing to open his jaws.
In the last moments, Maal’s voice was heard for the first time in mortal memory. It said one word. “Stop.”
When time resumed, a new Accord was reached. A compromise which left all parties unhappy was agreed to and bound in the blood of gods. Kosa was forbidden to kill Lemme’s line. But on the males he placed a horrible curse. They would be the center of his ire until the day the last of her descendants perished. Any who gave them shelter would suffer and die horribly. Kosa would punish all they loved, as he could not punish them, for the mistake that one man made.
If Kaie was a seer then that was the fate waiting for Sojun and Amorette. For the whole family. And he would survive it. He would watch as their misery unfolded, knowing it was because he loved them. Except he wasn’t a seer. They weren’t visions. Men saw directly.
“What do you think it means, Jun? What the Lemme said?”
“It means you’re almost more trouble than you’re worth, Rosy.” Sojun dropped his hand on Kaie’s shoulder in the same comforting gesture from a few hours and another lifetime ago. “More than that, I’m not going to think on.”
Five
Sojun fell asleep quickly but it was the longest wait of Kaie’s life. His friend was out almost the moment the sun was low enough that the light stopped streaming in from the holes in the thatched roof. It was a couple of hours; more than enough time for Kaie to drive himself crazy.
Just like every night spent together since they were three years old, Jun snored. He also slept so soundly that there was no worry of waking him. Kaie could leave singing loud enough to wake the whole village and his friend wouldn’t even stir. He didn’t sing though. He slipped out of his house as quietly as if it were his mother asleep on the floor by the dying fire. He never once got past her but trying as much as he did meant that he was plenty good at sneaking around.
Impossible or not, the village seemed even quieter than before. Silent, like right before a storm that ripped apart everything in its path. It was probably just because of the gnawing fear nestled in the pit of Kaie’s stomach. Still, he couldn’t shake the image from his mind as he slipped past one darkened hut after another.
He was back at the Lemme’s in less than half the time it took the three of them to walk the distance in daylight. The path he took
was a large part of that. More often than not, he was bypassing the road worn into the earth by the village’s feet walking the same places day after day in favor of a more direct route for one that passed dangerously close to the silent huts and took him through a garden or two. Not getting sick all over the place helped a lot too. But, with the way his insides were clenching and rolling, Kaie couldn’t rule that out as a possibility for this trip.
There was light seeping out from beneath the Lemme’s door. The sight of it drew Kaie up short. He almost turned back. He wanted to catch her unprepared, maybe even to wake her. He wanted the upper hand. It didn’t matter that she was an old woman, or that she was visibly sick. She was terrifying. Coming in when she was ready for him again was not an ideal arrangement. Besides, on the off chance that she really was just being cryptic before, he couldn’t think of any better way to avoid it this time then to rouse her from a sleep as deep as Sojun’s.
He needed to be sure. Before he could let Jun and Amorette risk everything for him he needed to be certain the Lemme wasn’t going to give them away. Somehow, he needed to convince her to stay quiet. Even with his mother.
Kaie pushed back in to the horrible smell.
She was sitting by her fire watching the door. When he stepped inside she locked her yellowed yes on him for all of a moment. Then she dropped them to tend to the flames.
“I expected you two hours ago.”
Despite all the curdling fear and tightly wound urge to flee Kaie found himself smiling. There was something wrong with him, that he planned to sneak up on a woman who saw into the future. “Yes Lemme. I’m sorry.”
She poked the fire with a fat stick, one too large for her fragile hands. The wood slipped from her fingers almost immediately. Kaie dropped to his knees and fished it out of the fire pit before it went up as well. Small flecks of heat glowed angrily as he set it aside.
