by HJ Bellus
“What time is it?” I throw my legs over the bed.
“Almost seven a.m.”
Jed reaches out his hand, helping me up. He pulls me in for a long, strong hug, kissing the top of my head. We dress in silence and walk hand in hand out of the cabin after Jed puts away the bed and locks it up. When we near the back of the store I tug my hand away from his, ready to go for Guy and then my bike.
“What are you doing?” Jed asks with a prying stare.
“My bike.”
After the events of last night and now it gets awkward. I flick my fingers on my free hand, waiting for his response. We did share an amazing night, and I’m devoted to being in his life, but not about to become a stage one clinger at this point. Hell, we didn’t exactly take things all that slow.
“Gonna break Fender’s heart if you and Guy skip out of here without paying him a visit.” Jed tugs me toward his parents’ cabin.
“You don’t play fair, Mr. Bryant.” I squeeze his hand. “Won’t your parents be…I don’t know pissed, confused with a random woman waltzing in their home?”
“You do know Caleb has a big mouth, right?” He peers down to me. “They pried and pried, trying to get details about you. Asshat took it upon himself to tell them all about the new pretty woman in town and his suspicion about me being fond of her.”
“Oh my God.” I slap my palm over my face. “Oh, he did.”
“Told them about the kiss, too.”
“This is embarrassing as hell.”
Guy’s eager bark cuts into our conversation. Our gaze cuts to the sound to see Fender on the back of Guy, clutching at his collar. His knuckles are white and a grin is plastered on his face. Guy gallops toward us with his tongue hanging out, and I swear a matching grin.
“He is riding him.” I pull my hand from Jed’s. “Holy shit, he could get hurt.”
Jed snags me by the waist, pulling me back into his chest. “He’s fine. Look at that smile. I live for it.”
Jed leans around and kisses the side of my head.
“Me, too. Makes the world seem right,” I whisper.
Guy nears us, slowing down, being cautious of his best friend on his back. Fender remains safe by the time Guy reaches us. He hops off, wiping his brow with a determined little hand.
“Daddy.” He collides into Jed’s legs. “We were chilling on the porch, and when Guys sawed Marwee, he took off. I held on. Tolds you I’m gonna be a cowboy riding them wild horses.”
“I saw, buddy.” Jed’s hand drops from my waist. He bends over, picking Fender up. He tosses him up in the air a few times, garnering squeals from him before pulling him to his chest.
“I missed you yesterday, Daddy.” Fender’s little arms go around his neck. “I tried keeping my eyes open until you gots back.”
“I know, buddy.” He ruffles his hair. “You have no idea how much I missed you yesterday.”
“Nana and Papa are back for a while now!”
“Nana have her famous French toast ready yet?”
“Piles and piles told me I had to wait for you.” Jed places Fender back on his feet. He darts away with Guy close on his heels.
Jed pulls my back into his chest, wrapping his arms low around my waist, nuzzling his nose in my neck, and begins walking. I clutch his locked hands.
“When are you going to tell him?”
“Tonight,” he sighs, his breath tickling my sensitive skin. “Mom bought a child’s book that she thinks will help him. I don’t think anything is going to. He won’t understand any of it.”
“He won’t, but your mom is smart. Kids can relate to things they don’t understand when it’s written out in picture books.”
“The lovebirds have risen.” Caleb stands on the porch with his arms above his head.
“He’s going to be relentless,” Jed whispers in my ear.
“Get your asses in here. Mom won’t let any of us eat until she meets Marlee.”
My stomach knots in nerves. This is new for me. Meeting the parents and impressing them and all.
Chapter 28
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” -Lucille Ball
Mr. and Mrs. Bryant are the perfect combination of Jed and Caleb. The men sure did get their welcoming, friendly vibe from them. I didn’t feel uncomfortable for one second in their presence. We were ushered straight to the table and ate for a good hour. The French toast was the best I ever had.
“Will you stay?” Jed grabs for my hand, whispering.
Fender lies between us deep in his afternoon nap. He’s been extra clingy to his dad today. He knows something is going on. He refused to lie down without Jed then demanded Guy, and I joined them. Jed’s frustration was apparent. I kissed him on the cheek and crawled in bed.
“If you want me to. I’ll be here.”
“Please.”
I smile, running a finger down his jawline. “No need for manners now.”
“The cancer institute called, and I need to be in Boise the night before the surgery. They took a bunch of blood yesterday for tests.”
“Okay.”
“The day before that, I’m going through with the charity concert.”
“You think your mind will be clear enough?”
He nods against the pillow. “Want to do that more than anything else. Always love playing for the veterans.”
I lick my lips, not knowing what to say. There are so many unanswered questions swirling around in my thoughts. Who will watch Fender? How long will he be in the hospital? What will I do when he’s gone?
“I want you there.”
Those simple four words that tumble from Jed’s lips answers every single one of my internal questions. I nod, ignoring the anxiety rising in the back of my spine. I’ll have to be in a car, in a hospital, and surrounded by dying people. It’s a crippling thought. Before the attack wins out, I rise from the bed and round the bottom of it. Jed lifts his head, watching me. That unruly black hair…wiping away a bit of the ache.
I crawl into bed behind Jed. He tries to roll on his back, but I keep him in place with my palms then body as I wrap my arms around his chest. My head is above his, so I’m able to kiss his face. When my lips graze across his bronzed skin, the attack begins to dissipate. I lose myself in Jed.
“Smile.”
I look up to a cell phone hovering above us. I bring my arms up to underneath his jawline, so they’re in the picture. Half of my face is hidden with all of Jed’s gorgeous one filling the frame. He counts down and when he gets to one, his dimples go on full display.
“Let me see it.” My voice is full of excitement. Taking selfies hasn’t been in my life for a while. The picture is perfect.
“Want me to send it to you?” He angles himself enough to get his lips on mine.
“My cell phone doesn’t have service,” I murmur into his lips.
“You can connect to Wi-Fi here,” he offers.
“No, like it’s not connected to a provider at all.”
He rolls the rest of the way over, wrapping me in his safe, loving arms. “We can fix that, and you can still hook up to Wi-Fi.”
“Don’t remember any email passwords or anything.”
“We can fix that.”
I shake my head, rubbing the tip of my nose along his.
“You’re a determined man.”
“Isn’t that what we are doing, Marlee? Fixing each other, breathing life back into our hope for the future.”
“Yes.” I smile against his lips.
He moves first, creating our connection into a deep kiss. I open up to him. It feels like we’ve been kissing for days and days because of how perfectly our mouths move against each other. His hand goes to my ass, palming it tight. I do the same. His length pushes into my center. Our bodies begin to move, both craving connection and friction.
I bite down on his bottom lip, breaking the kiss, knowing this is as far as it will go with our curr
ent predicament. “We can’t.”
“I know,” he pants. “But I want to.”
I reach down between us, palming his evidence. “Later. Your mom told me I could make a peach pie with the fresh peaches. She left out all the ingredients for me before she left for the store.”
“You’ve been dead set on making that pie for us, eh?”
“It’s how my mom raised me. She loves cooking.” My smile falls. That came out of nowhere. My heart feels the grief at the core.
“Go.” He squeezes my ass. “I’ll snooze with Fender and wake to the smell of a warm, homemade peach pie. And, Marlee, there’s a phone in the living room. Use it.”
Tears pool and only spill over when I step out of the room. It’s time to call Mom. It’s way overdue. My fingers tremble as I near the black, cordless phone. The ten-digit phone number tumbles around in my head. I’ll never forget those ten numbers that represent my home.
My fingers quake and tremble as I punch them. The tears fall faster and heavier. The first and second rings go unanswered. The easy thing to do would be to hang up, wipe away the tears, and shove it all back in. Avoiding it all.
I don’t.
Two more rings and I know the answering machine will pick. I squeeze my eyes shut, wanting nothing more than hearing a piece of my home.
“Hello.”
I slap my palm over my mouth to cage in the gasp.
“Hello.” Mom’s voice rings out again.
I’m unable to speak, move, hell, even think.
“Marlee,” she whispers into the phone with faith and trepidation. “Are you there?”
My voice cracks and walls shatter. “Mom.”
“Sweet baby girl. It is you.”
The line fills with sobs from each end for long beats of time. I hear Dad in the background, soothing Mom’s cries. I can picture him holding her, rocking her back and forth until she calms down.
“Are…are you okay?” she finally asks.
“I am.” I pause and speak the truth. “I’m better than I have been in a long time. I’m happy and learning how to live again.”
“Where are you?”
She’s always asked since I ran and I’ve avoided it. Not anymore.
“In Idaho, up in the mountains in a small town.”
A new voice joins the other end of the line. I recognize it right away. It’s Maddie coupled with Sara’s voice.
“Maddie’s there?” My hand shakes violently.
“Yes, Marlee.”
“Tell her,” Dad says in the background.
“Tell me what?” I ask.
“Coy never returned from his last deployment. Happened two months after you ran.”
“No!” I shriek.
“Yes, baby, Maddie spends a lot of time here. I’ve never told you because you were so broken, but it’s time. It’s time for you to let all of us back in.”
I nod. “I miss you guys. I’m sorry for what I put you through. I couldn’t stay there, Mom.”
“We know. The past is the past. We want our daughter back.”
I freeze at those words. “I’m not coming home. I can’t. I have a new home.”
Mom remains silent.
“And I want you and my family to see my new home in town.”
“Okay,” she stutters. “We’d love to come.”
“I promise I’ll call more, Mom. I love you and Dad more than you’ll ever know.”
Her sniffles slow down on her end. “Okay, Marlee. We love you.”
“Bye, Mom.”
I force myself to hang up the phone. The overwhelming urge to vomit rocks my world. I race from the phone, busting out the front door, the clean air smacking me in the face. When I’m at the bottom of the steps, I hunch over, retching. Tears are non-stop, cascading off my face.
Coy is dead.
My last memory of Maddie was when I scowled at her at Bentley’s funeral. I couldn’t stand the cries of Sara. I had her sent away. She was always there for me, and I sent her away, turned my back on her. Shut her out of my life. My body begins to go into shock, facing the devastation I created and left behind.
“Marlee.” The sound of racing footsteps near me. “Marlee, is Jed okay?”
Caleb wraps me in his arms, pulling me to him. I fight him with all I have. Caleb doesn’t give up until he has me in his arms.
“What is it?”
I shake my head from side-to-side, my loose hair whipping me in the face. “Not Jed. He’s okay.”
“Breathe, calm down, and breathe, Marlee.” He repeats over and over until I’m able to talk. I tell him everything. The pain is tearing right through me all over again.
“Marlee.” He brushes my hair out of my face. “We all do what we have to, to survive. And that’s what you did. The important part is taking steps to mend relationships. They’ll understand. Trust me.”
“No.” I shake my head. “No, they won’t.”
“Yes, they will,” he argues. “I’ve been in the same spot you are. Different circumstances, but the same feelings.”
His eyes are raw and full of honesty. He’s speaking from experience. I do not doubt that.
“Please don’t tell Jed about this. He has enough on his mind.”
“Agreed. Speaking of your boy toy, where is he?”
“Napping with Fender. I’m supposed to be baking a peach pie.”
“No damn excuses. Get your ass in the kitchen, woman.” He puts his hands on my shoulders, guiding me into the house until we are in the center of the kitchen.
Caleb plops his ass on the counter. “Get to it.”
He chats with me about random shit as I do the prep work. Each off the wall fact he shares begins to ground me.
“Did you know a pregnant goldfish is called a twit?” he asks, popping a slice of fresh peach in his mouth.
I swat his hand. “No. And stop eating the peaches, or there won’t be any left for the pie.”
He doesn’t listen, grabbing for another fresh peach slice. This time I catch the top of his hand with a sticky spatula, yet he still manages to get the peach. “How about this one. Human birth control pills work on gorillas.”
“Good lord, Caleb. You do need your head checked.”
It goes on like this until the top layer of the peach piecrust has brown sugar sprinkled on it and an intricate pattern carved into it. Mom always did that. I loved watching her hands work when I was younger.
The pie has been in the oven for a little over ten minutes before Martha and Luke Bryant walk in the front door.
“Smells amazing,” Martha sings, cuddled in next to her husband’s side.
“Get a room, you two.” Caleb rolls his eyes.
Martha darts for her son. “You may be the oldest son, but I’ll still whip you.” She snatches a wooden spoon from the counter, taking after Caleb.
“Get your ass off my counter before I beat it.”
A full-out WWF wrestling match ensues between mother and son. Luke snags a beer from the fridge and offers me one. I nod. He’s a gentleman like the men he raised. He pops off the top with a quick flick of his hand. It takes me a few beats to realize how he did. He used his wedding ring.
“Thank you.” I manage to get out over the roar of the ruckus in the living room.
Caleb has his mom pinned down on the floor, tickling her ribs.
“Doggy pile.” A bright-eyed and bushy-tailed Fender comes sprinting down the hallway with both arms raised over his head.
He leaps in the air, landing dead center on Caleb’s back.
“Get him, baby boy. Help Nana.” Martha urges him on.
Fender soaks up the words of encouragement, wrapping his arms around Caleb’s face, bending his neck backward, giving his nana the perfect opportunity to gift her son with a serious titty twister.
“This will go on forever.” Jed comes up behind me, rubbing his nose along the length of my scar that runs from my ear up to my hairline.
Luke chuckles. “And they will get vicious. They’ve
mellowed out since Fender started to join them, but back in the day I swear one of them would end up crying or bleeding.”
“Seriously?” I ask, turning to Luke.
“All in fun and games, but those two.” He points his beer bottle to the wrestling match. “But those two are the most competitive people I know.”
“I’ll agree to that.” Jed grabs the beer bottle from my hand, taking a long pull. “Smells delicious in here.”
The three of us sit back and wait for the wrestling match to dwindle. Luke was right. It goes on for a good twenty minutes before everyone has been tickled out.
“Ready?” Jed steps forward with me in his hands.
I’m confused for a bit of time before it dawns on me. Martha nods and relaxes back on the couch with her elbow propped up on her knee. Caleb scoots over on the floor until he’s next to her. He puts an arm around her. Tears fill her eyes.
“Hey, buddy. Dad needs to talk to you.” Jed scoops Fender up off the floor and takes a seat on the couch with him in his lap. I sit on the edge of the couch while Luke takes a seat on the other end.
“It’s family time.” He claps his hands together, peering around at everyone. “Wait.”
He jumps from Jed’s lap, runs out the front door, and returns with Guy.
“Now, it’s family time.” He climbs back up to his spot on his dad’s lap.
Guy sits obediently at his feet, placing his nose on the top of Fender’s leg. Tears are now rolling down Martha’s face, but Fender doesn’t notice.
“Daddy needs to tell you something, and I need you to pay real close attention, okay?”
He nods, still smiling his signature toothy grin.
“Nana bought you this book to help me explain it. It’s about a little boy your age.”
Jed opens the book and begins reading it. My throat constricts, and my eyes blur as he nears the end of it. The pages have held Fender captive the entire time. When Jed shuts the book, Fender looks up to Jed.
“You’re sick with cancer?” He blinks slow.
Jed ruffles his hair and tucks him to his chest. “Yeah, bud, I am. I’m going to be in and out of the hospital for a bit. And this is going to be our home.”
