by Sandra Brown
His gaze traveled down to her hand, which was absently fondling her watch. Why did those slim fingers always fuss with that watch? What significance did it hold for her? He really knew very little about her, he realized.
When he had held her against him today on his horse, it had taken every ounce of his willpower to keep from pressing a kiss on the nape of her neck where tendrils of ebony hair lay. He could have ridden for a hundred miles with her on his lap. What sweet agony it had been every time her body had been jostled against his.
The memory of that brief touch to her breast was vivid in his mind. He convinced himself that he hadn’t meant to do it. It was an accident. But his curiosity had been gratified to feel a firm fullness under his palm. If only he could see…
Jared stiffened when it occurred to him where his thoughts were leading. Just remember how she got here, he cautioned himself. She’s not the innocent, frail flower she looks with those ridiculous eyeglasses on. She’s a scheming little bitch. What I need is a rousing roll in the hay with some obliging whore. A pair of eager, parted thighs and it wouldn’t take long to get this preacher’s kid out of my mind.
Lauren saw that the soft look had fled his face. Dispiritedly she put the book away and took off her eyeglasses.
“Goodnight, everyone,” Maria stood as Rudy came back into the room carrying a mug of coffee. “I’m going to bed and leave you young people alone. Lauren,” she came and stood in front of the girl, cupping her face between her soft hands, “I’m so glad you are here with us. Ben would have loved to have been here. As a matter of fact, I think he was.” She kissed Lauren on the cheek and walked slowly down the hall.
“She’ll never get over losing him,” Rudy said quietly, as the slender figure moved out of sight.
“Yes,” Gloria sighed. “I’m going to bed, too,” she said, standing and going to Rudy’s chair. She leaned on the arms of it, her gaping blouse giving him an unobstructed view of the generous breasts barely contained within her chemise. They kissed long and hard, his hands resting lightly on her thick waist.
“Get my place warm for me. I’ll be a few more minutes,” he said when she finally pulled away.
“Don’t keep Jared up late. Remember, this is his honeymoon,” Gloria teased, rolling her eyes at Jared.
He shifted uneasily in his chair. “That’s all right, Gloria. I’m joining a hot poker game over at the bunkhouse. Some of the boys invited me, and you know these things can go all night sometimes.” He tried to sound jocular, but failed.
“A poker game!” Gloria exploded. “What in the world—” A sharp look from Rudy halted her. She looked at Lauren, who was standing stiffly in the shadows next to the door.
“Lauren, I’ll see that you are settled for the night,” Gloria said with commiseration.
“Goodnight, ladies,” Rudy said gently.
“Goodnight, Rudy. Goodnight, Jared,” Lauren whispered hoarsely.
“Goodnight, Lauren,” Jared said nonchalantly as he studied a fingernail.
Gloria shot her brother-in-law a murderous look before she went with Lauren down the hall.
* * *
Lauren had been tossing on the wide bed for several hours. She had heard Rudy going into the room across the hall and Gloria’s welcoming murmur as he closed the door behind him. That had been a long while ago, and the house was silent. The moon was bright, illuminating the bedroom in an ethereal glow.
She started when she heard footsteps stealthily approaching the door to the room. She turned to the far side of the bed and feigned sleep as the door opened.
Her whole body tensed as Jared walked into the room. He picked up one of the bags left standing in the middle of the floor, for she heard the buckle on it jangle. There was a long pause, and then the bag was lowered again to the floor.
He moved on Indian-trained feet to the side of the bed. She could smell the faint aroma of tobacco and the musky scent of leather as he leaned over her. He stood there for torturous minutes, immobile and silent. Lauren was aware of each breath as he inhaled and exhaled rhythmically. She felt a butterfly touch made by strong, lean fingers against her cheekbone. Her throat constricted and her heart pounded as if it would burst. Finally he turned and went back to the bags, picked them up, and then carried them from the room, closing the door softly.
The scents remained to tease her senses.
* * *
“Gone?”
“Yes, Lauren. He left before dawn this morning.” Gloria looked piteously at her new sister-in-law. Her heart went out to the girl whose husband treated her so abominably. When Rudy had joined her in their room the night before, they had speculated on the strange relationship between Jared and his bride. It appeared to be a marriage of convenience, but Rudy couldn’t guess the reasons behind it. He only knew that they must be damned essential to Jared’s well-being to have forced him into any marriage.
“Wh-where did he go?” Lauren’s heart had plummeted when Gloria told her that Jared had ridden out with enough supplies in his saddlebags to last him several days.
“He went to check out some problems on the far western side of the ranch. There have been reports of marauding bobcats killing our cattle. Don’t worry about him, Lauren. He’ll be back soon, I’m sure.” She didn’t tell her that any one of the vaqueros who worked at Keypoint could have handled this job.
“Yes, I’m sure he will,” Lauren mumbled. A few days ago, she had dreaded the sight of Jared. Now the prospect of not seeing him every few hours seemed dismal. What was the matter with her? She felt rejected, abandoned. This was supposed to be her honeymoon!
The liniment hadn’t worked out all the soreness in her legs and hips, but when Rudy asked her if she would like to ride with him that afternoon, she agreed. The ranch life was exhilarating. She wanted to absorb every aspect of it, savor its energy, its vigor. This was Ben’s land. Keypoint was his conception. And like him, it was vital and alive. At Keypoint Lauren felt even closer to the man who had brought her here wanting her to become a part of it.
As Jared’s absence lengthened, it became her habit to ride with Rudy or some of the vaqueros in the afternoons. In the mornings, she played with the Mendez children, who were teaching her Spanish. They would burst into peals of laughter when she got a word wrong or had trouble pronouncing it. Sometimes she read to them before bedtime. Lauren also loved being with Gloria, and the two women soon shared a deep friendship. Lauren had had so few women friends in her life that she treasured this new relationship.
She relished her visits with Maria Mendez, too. The older woman spent a great deal of time secluded in her room, as had been her inclination ever since Ben’s death. Even when she was with the rest of them, she seemed withdrawn, dreamlike, separated from reality. Lauren thought she looked at peace during these times, and rather imagined that she was communicating with Ben on a plane where no one else could intrude.
The first week passed quickly. Lauren’s heart raced each time she heard pounding hooves, but she continued to be disappointed. She kept searching the horizon for signs of the large palomino and his mount in the wide-brimmed black hat, but to no avail.
She acclimated to the ranch life so enthusiastically that Gloria and Rudy were amazed. The vaqueros would tip their hats to her with a humble, “Good morning, Mrs. Lockett,” to which she replied, calling them by name. They all respected and liked her.
One day she was timidly approached by a Mexican cowboy with dark, dancing eyes. “Señora Lockett, I am Carlos Rivas, Elena’s husband.” He smiled shyly and twisted his sombrero in his hands.
“It’s so nice to meet you, Carlos!” Lauren cried. “How is Elena?”
“She thinks the baby come soon.”
“Please let me know when it does. Tell her hello for me.”
“Sí, señora.”
She had also seen the enigmatic Comanche, Thorn. He had never spoken to her, but he tipped his hat whenever they met. His expression never changed, but Lauren felt that his eyes missed nothing. S
he hoped his assessment of her was favorable. His dark, austere face and long braids intimidated her, though she felt instinctively that he was a friend.
Ten days after his departure, Jared came home. He rode in one evening just before dinnertime, looking tired and dirty as he clumped through the large front door. From his boots to his hat, he was covered with a fine layer of trail dust.
“Well, look what just dragged in.” Rudy stood with his hands on his hips eyeing Jared as if he were something distasteful.
“Am I in time for dinner? I’ve ridden like hell for the past few hours. I’m sick of camp food,” he said sheepishly.
“We’ll wait for you, Jared. Just go wash up first and turn Charger over to someone in the stable.” Gloria spoke to him coolly, and he looked in turn at the faces staring at him reproachfully. Lauren didn’t look at him at all. Her dark head was bowed as she stared down into her plate. He felt like the outsider.
“I’ll be right back,” he muttered as he stepped out the door.
Lauren’s heart was in her throat. He had barely glanced in her direction, yet she felt his presence in the room as strongly as if he had touched her. Conversation went on around her as everyone waited patiently for Jared to come back.
He returned, having discarded his chaps, leather vest, bandana, and spurs. He wore a clean shirt and his hair was still damp from the recent dunking in the bunkhouse washbowl.
He crossed the room to Maria and kissed her proffered cheek. Her greeting was the only warm one he received. His kiss intended for Gloria’s cheek landed somewhere in the air as she turned away quickly, and Rudy shook his hand with none of the usual banter between them. He took his seat beside Lauren and only then did he turn to her. “Hello, Lauren.”
“Hello, Jared. Was your… trip… successful?”
“I shot two bobcats and visited some of the nesters we allow to use our water. It was basically uneventful.”
There seemed to be nothing more to say, and everyone commenced eating. The food stuck in Lauren’s throat. She was jittery and breathless, and when one of the children called from the bedrooms, she jumped up to go to him, anxious to get away from the dominating individual beside her.
“I don’t know what we’ll do when Lauren has to go back to Coronado with you, Jared. We have all come to love her so much.” Gloria wanted to slap her brother-in-law as he shrugged indifferently. She continued undaunted, “The children adore her and she has been such a help around here, hasn’t she, Maria?”
“She’s a wonderful girl, Jared. You’re lucky that Ben brought her here.” Jared growled deep in his throat.
Rudy chuckled. “I know at least a dozen of the hands who would love for you to have a fatal accident, Jared. They’d whisk her away in no time flat.”
Jared scowled at him. “When the hell has she been around any vaqueros?”
“Every day when she goes out riding. You’d be amazed how eager they’ve been to answer her questions. She’s a fast learner.”
“I’ll bet,” Jared grumbled around the food in his mouth.
Lauren came back and sat down. Rudy stood up for her; Jared stared sullenly at the bowl of chrysanthemums in the center of the table.
“One place Lauren hasn’t seen is Pecan Creek. You really should take her up there before the weather turns too cold.”
Gloria took her cue from Rudy. “Why don’t you go tomorrow? You could take a picnic and enjoy being alone.”
“I don’t think—” Lauren began.
“Not tomorrow,” Jared interrupted. “I’ve got too much work to do around here.”
“Nonsense,” Maria interjected. She wasn’t going to sit idly by and see one of Ben’s best plans thwarted by Jared’s obstinacy. “You’ve been gone for almost two weeks. You deserve a day off. You’ll leave first thing in the morning, and I’ll supervise packing your lunch. I know just what you like.
“Be sure to take a gunnysack and gather some pecans for me. We’ll be needing them for Thanksgiving and Christmas baking. Remember when I used to send you and Rudy there each fall? Ben would give you a penny for each nut you brought back. Those were such happy days,” she said wistfully. She cleared her throat. “Yes, you’ll go tomorrow.”
The matter seemed settled. Jared glared at Rudy with a withering look. Rudy smiled back, the epitome of innocence. Maria and Gloria smiled at each other conspiratorially. Lauren fumbled with her watch, which trembled on her breast.
* * *
“Goddammit, what do you expect me to do, Rudy? I’ve tried every argument. They want that power plant and we want a railroad. They’ve got us by the balls.”
“I don’t know, but you’ve got to do something! Ben would have gone to war before letting those sonsofbitches on his land.”
The ladies in the main room looked at each other as the voices, raised in frustration and anger, reached them from the front porch where Jared and Rudy had retired after dinner to smoke a cigar. Maria put aside her mending, Gloria paused in stringing some beads she had promised Lucy, and Lauren dropped the book she was reading into her lap. She alone knew what subject had brought such an outburst from the brothers.
The voices outside returned to normal, and the women resumed their activities. Every once in a while, a word or phrase would carry back to them, punctuated in emphasis or urgency.
When Rudy and Jared came back inside, their mouths were set and grim. Each looked immediately toward Lauren, Jared with hostility, Rudy with something akin to pity.
So, Lauren thought, Jared has told his brother the circumstances of our marriage. For a moment, she feared that Rudy’s opinion of her would alter, that he would condemn her for the decision she had made. But one look at his face—open, friendly, compassionate—assured her that this wouldn’t be the case.
“If we have to go to Pecan Creek tomorrow, be ready early.” Jared stalked out the door after addressing Lauren with all the enthusiasm of a prisoner awaiting execution at dawn. No one challenged his sleeping arrangements this time.
Gloria and Rudy went to their room. Lauren placed her book back in the shelf and, taking off her eyeglasses, walked to the window. She saw the tall, lean figure striding toward the bunkhouse with his broad shoulders hunched defensively.
She didn’t know that Maria was behind her until the woman placed a reassuring arm around her slender waist. “Ben fought his love for me like a man possessed, Lauren. They are both tough, strong men. Tenderness doesn’t come easy to Jared. Or even kindness. Be patient with him.”
Lauren couldn’t speak for fear of weeping. She turned to Maria and hugged her quickly before seeking the privacy of her room. Jared’s room.
* * *
Gloria helped Lauren braid her hair in the style now familiar to her. She wore the same suit she had worn on the morning she and Jared left Coronado for Keypoint. The ensemble that had seemed scandalously indecent at the time now felt quite comfortable. She had become accustomed to many changes in her life.
Maria was in the kitchen making good her promise to prepare their lunch. Jared strolled in and without a word handed Lauren a dark blue bandana. She looked at it and then at him with puzzlement.
“It’s clean,” he said testily. “I borrowed it from one of your many admirers and washed it myself. You may need it today.”
She took the scarf and folded it into a triangle. Placing it around her neck, she tried to tie it as the vaqueros wore theirs, but her fingers were unaccountably clumsy.
“Here,” Jared said in exasperation, batting her hands away. He stepped closer to her and wound the ends of the bandana into a perfect knot. Deft as he was at this, it seemed to take an inordinate amount of time to get it right. He moved closer still, and his fingers found it necessary to brush against the warm, smooth skin of her throat as he adjusted the scarf.
“Thank you,” she said when he finally stepped away. He only shrugged in response.
After a hurried breakfast, she and Jared departed. Lauren waved goodbye to Gloria and Maria, who stood framed
in the doorway. Flame had now become known as “Mrs. Lockett’s mount,” and a rapport had developed between Lauren and the mare. Jared was mildly surprised when he spurred Charger into a gallop and Lauren followed suit, keeping pace with him effortlessly. Well, she’s learned something, he thought grudgingly. She had lost her eastern pallor, too, and her complexion had taken on a healthy, rosy glow.
He wouldn’t admit to anyone, even to himself, that he had missed her while he had been away. He wouldn’t define the sense of longing that had plagued him from the time he left. Scattered over Lockett land were sheep ranchers and nesters whom he visited, and their daughters always welcomed a pat on the bottom or a stolen kiss. They had all been disappointed this time. Jared spent his time in serious conversation with the menfolk. He hadn’t consciously avoided the women. He just wasn’t interested, and therefore didn’t give them a thought.
At night, rolled up in his blankets, he tossed and turned in an effort to rid himself of disturbing mental images. Lauren in her dressing gown, her hair spilling over her shoulders. Lauren sleeping in his bed at the ranch, moonlight caressing her cheeks. Lauren in deep concentration over a book, her eyeglasses resting on her nose. Lauren. Lauren. Lauren.
He cursed himself for being a fool as his imagination drifted and he pictured himself lifting a stray lock of hair from her shoulder and kissing it. He was caressing her cheek resting against his pillow. He was sliding the spectacles off her nose in order to kiss her soft mouth.
Sleep eluded him night after night. He sat before his dying campfire smoking cheroots and cursing his intense physical discomfort and the conniving wench who had manipulated his father and was now trying to do the same thing to him. Well, he’d be damned before he’d let her get to him!
But as he’d approached Keypoint last night, his heartbeat had accelerated as he spurred Charger into a mad gallop. Jared swore that his eagerness to get home had nothing to do with the woman he had left there. Now, as he watched her from under the protection of his hat brim, he wasn’t so sure.
