by Haley Nix
On one occasion I mentioned to Garrett my concern about not hearing back from Colt for so long, but he didn’t seem in the slightest bit concerned.
“I wouldn’t worry about it,” he said. “It’s like that in some areas. If he told you he might not get a chance to respond quickly, I’d assume he’s alright.”
“But he said it could be weeks, maybe over a month. But it’s been over two,” I said, the concern in my voice obvious even to myself.
Garrett seemed to realize how anxious I was because he brought me in for a hug, something totally out of character that he’d never done before.
“Colt is fine. He’s the toughest guy I know. And if anything had happened we would have heard about it. There’s a chain of communication for these things.”
I lay there on his shoulder for a second, trying to believe that what he said was true.
Taking Garrett’s advice I just tried to concentrate on other things. I kept writing Colt, even without receiving a response. I started to wonder if he was even getting my letters, but kept writing anyways, thinking to myself that as long as I wrote them it meant he was out there, that eventually he’d get a chance to read them.
But as it was life moved on. The weather had changed for the better and soon finals were just around the corner. I was almost thankful to be overwhelmed with studying because of the distraction it provided. I was up late nearly every night poring over textbooks, jotting down extensive notes, making outlines and flashcards.
I joined a study group from my Intermediate Bio class and it really seemed to be helping out. I’d meet up with them at a nearby coffee shop and we’d review together once a week, and then three times a week before finals. Working with the other students gave me a huge source of support and going into exam week I felt more confident than ever before.
During exam week, I had two finals on Thursday and another on Friday. It would have been way too much material to cram in just a few days, so when I finally sat down at my desk for the first test on Thursday, I was very glad that I’d made the decision to start studying way ahead of time.
As the professor passed out the exam for Anatomy, I took a deep breath. Here we go, I said to myself. But surprisingly enough I felt much less nervous than I typically was in these types of situations. The professor placed a test on my desk face down, and after the last few students had received their exams he headed to the front of the room.
Noting the time on his watch, he told us to turn our exams over and begin. We had three hours to complete them. We’d started at 10:05 AM, which mean we’d have to put down our pencils by exactly 1:05 PM.
I turned over my exam and was thrilled to find out that I knew the answers immediately to the first three multiple choice questions. But as I moved through remainder of the test, however, things got more difficult. I struggled with a few other multiple choice questions, narrowing each down to two of the original four options. Oh well, I thought, at least I had a 50-50 shot at getting points.
The next section, true or false, was a bit easier on the whole. But then came the dreaded essay section. I knew this would be the hardest part of the exam, the part I had struggled with previously when taking my midterm. But fortunately, I still remained calm and clearheaded. I trusted in myself. I knew that’s that Colt would have told me to do.
You know this stuff, Cat. Just go in there and crush it.
I could almost hear him saying these words in my mind. I smiled to myself. Yes, I would crush it, for myself and for him.
Chapter Six
Colton
I hadn’t heard from Cat in a long time. It was the last day of April. I knew finals would be coming up soon and I wondered how she was doing back home.
Our operation in Helmand had been successful, but it had come with its share of burdens as well. One member of our squadron was killed, and three more had been flown out on evacuation helicopters after our medics did what they could. I prayed that those boys would be alright.
That aside, it had gone well. The fighting with insurgents had lasted over three days, but by the end of it they’d been completely eradicated from the area. That was over a month ago. Gradually now, the former villagers were starting to come back, knowing that they would be safe under the protection of U.S. soldiers.
The rudiments of a bazaar started cropping up, and weeks later it had turned into a full-fledged and bustling marketplace. I walked through it on patrol with one of my fellow soldiers, a man about my age named Percy Ericson. Percy was from North Carolina, but he’d been in Afghanistan for a while now, working a similar operation to the one we were currently a part of.
“It’s amazing what we’ve been able to do here,” said Percy as we strolled through the bazaar.
It was deathly hot out, but somehow I’d grown used to that.
“It truly is,” I said, looking around me as we walked through the throngs of people. “Look how happy these people are to be out at the market, just talking, interacting, exchanging… It’s crazy to think we take all of this for granted back home.”
“I know,” said Percy. “Being born an American makes me about the luckiest son of a bitch on earth.”
“I’m inclined to agree.”
“Hey, you hungry?” asked Percy, switching gears.
“I could go for something.”
Percy stopped over by one vendor selling some type of bread and some other food I couldn’t quite discern the origins of. He spoke briefly to the man in Pashto – not that I could recognize any of the words, but the distinctive sound told me it wasn’t Arabic. Soon he came back over with two plates, one for me and one for himself.
“What hell is this?” I asked, staring down at the food on my plate.
“The best meal you’ve had in weeks,” said Percy.
“No really, what is this?”
“The bread is called Nan-e Afghani, and then there you’ve got some stewed goat, and that’s yogurt sauce.”
“And I’m not gonna get food poisoning?”
“I make no promises,” said Percy with a laugh as he rolled up some goat meat with the bread and dipped it in the sauce. “Go on man, eat up. I’m telling you, this is good stuff.”
Reluctantly, I gave it a shot and to my surprise found that he wasn’t kidding around. It really was delicious, marinated in some kind of spices I’d never had before. It certainly beat the pants off of the MREs we were eating back at the base on the outskirts of town.
After taking that short break and grabbing some bottles of water, we headed back on patrol, hunger satisfied and ice water keeping us going in the sweltering heat. For a minute I pondered whether Cat would even recognize me when I got back, as tan as I was becoming under the brilliant desert sun.
***
After our patrol that day, I came back to the base to find a bundle of letters from Cat. I stood there thumbing through the envelopes, counting eight in total. Immediately, I was pissed. I was just receiving these letters now? The earliest one I found was dated over two months ago.
Then I started wondering whether my own letters had been lost in the mail. It made me angry because this was the only contact I had with Cat, and to be cut off for months like this was more punishing than being assigned to a barren environment in the middle of nowhere.
But as I read through the letters, my emotions changed. They were filled with so many details, some of them exciting, some of them mundane, that I felt like I was back there with her, living through these lost months together. They reminded me of the conversations we’d have every night at dinner or in bed after making love.
I lay back on my cot and read through them one by one, then read them over again. Life seemed to be going well for her and that gave me some comfort. She was a bit worried about her upcoming finals, but she seemed well-prepared based on all the studying she’d mentioned in her letters, plus I knew she was a smart, hard-working girl. I had to believe that things would work out for someone like that in the end.
I was feeling sleepy now
as I lay in the cot; it was late and all the reading had made me tired. But I decided to drag myself out of bed and pen her a quick letter of encouragement on her final exams. I was craving contact with her after so much time apart; writing letters was unfortunately the only contact that was possible.
Chapter Seven
Catherine
When I got out of my second exam, I was absolutely exhausted. It had started at 3:30 PM, so I’d had a bit of a break after my first exam to get some last minute studying in. I felt well-prepared as I sat down to the test, but that didn’t change the fact that it had been an absolutely grueling several hours to sit through.
Once we were finished, a couple people from the class invited me out to drinks. It was my first impulse to decline, tired as I was. Then I realized I deserved to have a little fun. I did have my last exam, Intermediate Bio, the following day, but I knew that there was no chance I’d be studying at all tonight after six hours of exams today.
“Sure, why not?” I said, and walked with the group to a bar downtown.
As we all sat around a table cradling drinks, talk inevitably turned to the exam we’d just taken. Everyone agreed that it was insanely hard, but people were hoping that meant there would be a pretty steep curve.
I smiled to myself as I sipped my drink and listened to everyone talk. Secretly, I didn’t think the exam was that bad. Sure, it was super long and difficult to get through, but I came out feeling like I’d aced it. Of course, I didn’t want to say that in front of everyone and look arrogant, so I just ordered a drink and jumped in on the conversation as soon as it went in another direction.
A little while later someone suggested appetizers and I decided to stick around and have dinner with everyone. It was nice. I didn’t know many of these people from class, so it was cool to actually sit down with them and talk for a bit. It was funny how much we could relate to each other simply in virtue of having just sat through the same exam.
Eventually, people started to ask for the check and make for the door. A lot of them, like me, had exams tomorrow, and people weren’t trying to stay out too late. Going home sounded like a good idea at this point; I was starting to get a bit tipsy and that made me feel sleepy.
As we got up, I decided it was probably best to call a cab, but then one of the guys from class offered me a ride home. He’d only had two drinks and seemed sober, so I decided to take him up on it.
Once we were out on the road, he started asking me a lot of questions about myself. He said he’d seen me in class and had always wanted to talk to me. It was flattering, I suppose, but I started to get the impression he had ulterior motives for offering me a ride.
When we pulled up to my apartment complex, I got out and thanked him outside my building. After closing the door, he rolled down the window and asked if I wanted to hang out.
“Maybe I could come up for a bit. We could have one more drink or something.”
I smirked.
“Sorry, cowboy. I’m taken. You’ll just have to go pick up someone else tonight.”
“Ha, alright,” he said, clearly annoyed.
I laughed and went inside. The poor boy; did he really think he had a shot?
On my way up to the apartment I stopped to get my mail and found something that absolutely made my day. It had been such a long time since I’d heard anything from colt. Seeing that letter in my mailbox made me feel so damn good. I rushed into my apartment and sat down to open it.
***
Dear Cat,
I hope you get this letter, but based on what happened today I know that’s certainly not a guarantee. When I came in from patrol earlier, I found a stack of letters from you that had apparently been held up somewhere along the line. I immediately read them all and I’m glad to hear that things are still going well.
Things are just fine here. Our operation was a huge success and right now life has been relatively low-key. I spend most of my days patrolling peaceful streets and also providing security at the large market bazaar at the center of the town. Now that things have been secured here there is some talk that some of us will be heading to a different area for another mission, but my lieutenant is wary of that proposition. He’s convinced that once we leave the area the security situation will deteriorate dramatically, so everything is still very much up in the air.
I’ve been missing you like crazy, all the more so when I think about the dinners we used to sit down to every night. You are such a damn good cook and the way you spoiled me back home has absolutely ruined me for the MREs I’m forced to eat back at the base. One thing, which I know you’ll find funny given the Texas boy that I am, my new favorite meal here is stewed goat. Yes, you read that right: GOAT. There’s a man out at the bazaar that cooks it up really nicely – but damn, if that doesn’t tell you how dire my food situation is, I don’t know what will, haha.
But it’s not just your cooking I miss, it’s everything from our life together back home: the conversations, stopping by the bar when you’re at work, nearly constant sex. I’m sorry to be so blunt with that last part, but dammit it’s been so long since I’ve touched you. I just want to pick you up in my arms and carry you back to bed. I could go crazy out here just thinking about you.
It dawned on my today that you’re probably coming up on exams soon, so I wanted to wish you luck even though I know you don’t need it. You’re going to do well and truthfully I wouldn’t expect anything less. Let me know how they go. Hopefully you get to read this letter before they’re over!
Love,
Colt
***
Catherine
After reading that letter, I pulled it against my chest, hugging my arms tightly around myself and trying to imagine Colt was here with me. I was grateful to hear from him and know that even though we were apart our lives were still inevitably intertwined.
But it was then that I realized I was crying. Reading his words made him seem so close yet so far. I knew the tears were partially a product of the drinks I’d had tonight, but that didn’t make my sadness any less real.
I thought about penning him a letter right then and there but instead decided to have a glass of water and head to bed. I’d write him a good long letter tomorrow after my last exam of the semester letting him know how it went.
Chapter Eight
Colton
A few weeks later I got a letter from Cat telling me she’d received my last letter on the night before her last final exam. The last exam was for Intermediate Bio, a class I knew she’d been reluctant to take. She told me that my words had encouraged her and that she’d come out of the exam feeling like she’d totally nailed it. Reading that made me smile, made me feel close to her despite the spatial distance between us.
Within three weeks I received another letter, this one containing a printout of her grades for the semester.
Intro to Anatomy: A
Intro to Physiology: A
Intermediate Biology: A-
I shouted out loud when I read that. Hell yeah, that’s my girl! I wished I could hug her right then, take her out to dinner and buy her the most expensive bottle of champagne imaginable. But that, clearly, was not possible. So instead I sat down and wrote her a letter in response.
***
The following morning I got up early. Percy and I were heading out on foot patrol again. I was looking forward to it. Percy was teaching me some Pashto and I liked getting a chance to practice it with some of the native Afghans. I was also craving more goat. Weird, I know, but being out here will do that to a man.
But later as we walked through the bazaar something unexpected happened. A man ran up to us frantically, speaking rapidly and pointing over his shoulder. Seconds later we heard a blast and crowds of people came running behind him and sprinted past us in fear.
People screamed and ran into buildings seeking cover. I could see smoke rising up ahead of us. Percy and I looked at each other and moved close to the walls of the buildings on the right side of us. I gave him cover
as he made his way to an alley and posted up against the back of the wall. After surveying the scene, I made a mad dash and following him.
Once I was there, we stayed posted up close to the wall. I looked high while he looked low as we tried to establish the position of the enemy. While peeking out from behind the well, we saw armed gunmen walking through the now empty streets, their faces covered and identities obscured. Their ragged clothes and assault weapons told me they were insurgents.
Percy wanted to take them out immediately, but I knew he couldn’t get a clean shot from the alley. Besides, if there were more of them we could get pinned in and then we’d both be finished. I noticed a car parked about twenty feet from the alley, just close enough for Percy to get to before drawing attention. I looked over at Percy and nodded in the direction of the car.
“If you can make it to that car, I’ll cover you. Can you get off a clean shot?”
Percy nodded.
“Alright,” I whispered quietly. “Go on three.”
Within seconds Percy was out sprinting and I posted up against the wall offering him cover. I heard shots go off, with bullets striking the walls of the building a few feet over my head as I ducked back into the alley crouching low.
Then I heard the recognizable sound of Percy’s gun firing in rapid bursts. I heard a man scream and then another gun returning fire. I looked out behind the wall as Percy fired back, hitting the second man who collapsed to the ground. I watched as Percy ducked back behind the engine block of the car.
