“I know adoption is serious,” Everett agreed. “Babies are serious.” He looked troubled, and then the shadows passed from his eyes as he handed Carrie a business card. “You can reach me any time at that number.”
“Thank you.” Carrie tucked his card into her purse.
As soon as Everett walked away, Brian shook his head. “I don’t like the idea of going outside of a reputable adoption center.”
“I agree…for now. Let’s just see what happens in the next few months. If it goes a really long time and we haven’t heard anything or been chosen by a birth mother, maybe we’ll want to call Everett then.”
When Brian turned to face her, Carrie could see he’d already dismissed the encounter with Everett as well as the idea of a private adoption. “You asked me if I’ll be home for dinner. I won’t be. I have a meeting at the Hilton.” Apparently she couldn’t hide her disappointment because he went on, “I’ll try to be home before midnight.”
Carrie knew if Brian said he’d be home before midnight, he would be.
Her husband looked as if he wanted to say more, maybe do more. Public displays of affection had gone the way of holding hands and kissing in the car at stoplights. But as if he needed some type of contact between them as much as she did, he slid his forefinger along a wave of her auburn hair that had gotten caught under her coat. Gently he pulled it free and then stepped away.
“I’ll see you tonight.” His voice was low and husky, making her wonder if the pictures running through her head were running through his.
“Tonight,” she murmured.
A few moments later, Brian strode toward the parking garage, and she headed for the hospital. She loved reading stories to the children in pediatrics and today was her day to volunteer there. The time would pass quickly, and maybe at the end of the day she’d look at baby furniture before returning home to her big, beautiful empty house. Soon it wouldn’t be empty.
Soon, she and Brian would have the family they’d always wanted.
At eleven forty-five, Brian entered his kitchen after resetting the security system. Carrie was obsessive about it. If he slid into bed without waking her, he often heard her in the middle of the night going downstairs to check it. The few times he’d questioned her about it, she’d simply said she felt safer when she was sure it was on.
Striding down a hall, Brian bypassed the first floor spare bedroom and stopped in his den. After he set his briefcase on his desk, he hit a button on the computer, saw that he had no pressing e-mails, and headed for the second floor.
The house he’d bought after he and Carrie had married projected traditional charm. When he’d shown it to Carrie for the first time, she’d just kept saying, “It’s so big!”
It wasn’t that big. The two-story foyer opened into a dining room on the right and a living room on the left. A corridor to the left of the stairs led to his den and a guest bedroom. Pocket doors separated the living room from a great room, and beyond the great room’s French doors, outdoor floodlights beamed along a path leading to a gazebo-enclosed hot tub. He’d always envisioned three or four kids playing in the family room and in the yard. His gut still twisted when he thought about not being able to have kids of their own. Yet watching those babies in the nursery today…
He mounted the stairs, remembering the two-bed-room box house he’d grown up in. His father had lived there until he’d died two years ago, refusing to let Brian move him anywhere bigger. Carrie’s background had been even poorer than his own because her father had been disabled from a logging accident and her mother was unskilled. They’d been on and off welfare until Carrie had begun modeling. After Carrie’s mom had sent her daughter’s picture to a contest in a magazine, their lives had changed drastically.
The first night he’d met Carrie, he’d been bowled over by her—her beautiful long, wavy auburn hair and porcelain skin, her big brown eyes that seemed to see into his soul. She’d looked so sophisticated and been so poised and well-spoken that he’d never suspected her background had been similar to his.
Moonlight flowed through a skylight in the hall as Brian reached the top of the stairs. Their bedroom door was invitingly ajar and a dim light glowed within. When he stepped inside the master suite, his gaze didn’t sway toward the graceful columns that separated the sleeping area from a sitting room with its own fireplace. Rather it swerved unerringly toward the huge, king-sized bed. Although Carrie was five foot eight, with long graceful legs, she still seemed small and fragile in that bed.
Their triple dresser and the almost ceiling-high armoire were simply blurs as Brian quickly undressed and hung his suit in the closet. His wife was sound asleep. He could tell. When she curled on her side like that and tucked her hands under her cheek, she usually didn’t stir. Why should she? It was midnight.
He’d already been at the top of his game when he’d met her and had invested and saved more money than he could ever spend. His first successful land development deal had been followed by another and then another. He’d worked hard, used his intuition as well as his wit. He’d found, bought and sold land from Hawaii to Alaska to the coast of Maine. Although he’d always worked long hours, Carrie had understood the business he was in, knowing his pager could go off at any time or he could be bothered by an international conference call in the middle of the night. Still, during their courtship and the first year of their marriage, they’d had more time for each other. He’d taken her to Aruba and the Caymans. He’d introduced her to Tuscany vineyards and the moors of Cornwall. Sometimes trips were work-related, others they’d stayed in bed as much as they’d seen the sights. But then something had happened.
They couldn’t get pregnant.
Finally they’d both been tested and found Carrie’s tubes were blocked. Knowing how much he’d always wanted a real family, she’d been heartsick. The doctors had offered hope that had withered rather than materialized when the procedure to correct the problem wasn’t successful. Then the in vitro failed, too.
In the past few years, work had taken over more of Brian’s life, and Carrie just seemed to be on the fringes of it. Although the chemistry between them had tumbled them both into a whirlwind courtship and marriage, Brian had always sensed Carrie held part of herself away from him. Much more experienced than she was, at first he’d thought it was an innocent shyness, then a natural reserve that came from her upbringing. But as having a family eluded them month after month, she’d seemed to withdraw more, and he had to admit he’d been in turmoil about all of it, too. When she’d suggested adoption, he hadn’t wanted to consider it. But the tension had grown more palpable between them, and he’d finally agreed to begin the interview process.
Now…
Now as he approached the bed and looked at his wife’s body under the sheet, he realized Carrie wasn’t wearing a nightgown. Usually she did. Usually he enjoyed ridding her of it. The sight of her in the moonlit shadows, the idea of his skin touching hers, aroused him fully.
When she felt his weight on the bed, she came awake as if even in her dreams she’d been waiting for him. Her eyes opened and her hand fluttered out to touch him. It landed lightly on his chest. “I tried to stay awake. What time is it?”
“Midnight.”
“Long day,” she murmured sleepily but then came more awake and smiled at him.
The light, whispery scent of a flowery shampoo seemed to pull him closer to her. Switching off the lamp and angling on his side, he was suddenly overwhelmed by a caveman desire to make her his without gentle kisses and touches, without foreplay, with nothing but mindless need. Yet something had always kept him from doing that. Carrie’s entry into his life had made him notice starlight and sunsets and orchids growing on undeveloped land. She’d awakened a protective instinct in him as well as a primitive one.
When he slid his hand into her hair, she raised her face to his.
“Are you as excited as I am about adopting this baby?” she asked softly.
“I will be. It’s not real yet.
”
“It could happen quickly.”
“Or an unwed mother could choose us early in her pregnancy, and we’d go through the whole process with her. It would take months.”
“That might be even more wonderful.”
His wife’s voice was happy with the idea, but Brian knew that that scenario carried its share of hazards. What if the mother changed her mind? What if she gave birth and kept the baby? As far as he was concerned, adoption was filled with land mines. But it was their only option now except for a surrogate, and he believed that would be even more complicated.
“You’re still not sold on adoption, are you?” Carrie’s voice caught with worry.
“I want a family, and I want it with you.” As far as he was concerned, that said it all.
Her eyes became luminous then, and he couldn’t restrain the desire to kiss her. It was hot and deep and wet, and Carrie responded to it by meeting his tongue with hers, wrapping her arms around his neck, moving her body close to his. They usually took it slower but there seemed to be a desperation in both of them tonight. Their touches, kisses and caresses were filled with a yearning he couldn’t define. When he entered her, she clung to him. Their bodies glistened as they climaxed.
When the ripples of pleasure from their lovemaking ended, Brian rolled away from Carrie, physically spent. More than physically spent. Something about their union tonight had shaken him. It was as if they’d been skating on a frozen lake, had felt the ice cracking beneath them, and had held on to each other just the same, denying what was happening.
Carrie slipped her hand into his and they lay there a long time. “Are you awake?” she asked in a whisper.
“Yes.”
“The caterer called today while I was at the hospital to go over the menu for Saturday night. I’ll finalize everything with him tomorrow. We’re still having six guests?”
The dinner they were giving on Saturday would bring together his closest associates and their wives. “Yes, plus the two of us. Do you still want to fly to San Francisco with me on Wednesday to see your sister?”
“If that’s all right with you.”
“I’d like you to have dinner with my client and his wife.”
“That’s fine. Brenda has to go to work at five anyway. I’m hoping if we have a few hours alone, I can convince her to give college another try.”
Carrie’s younger sister Brenda was twenty now. She’d dropped out of Berkeley and an education Carrie had been funding because she’d fallen in love with an L.A. musician. It hadn’t worked out and she was back in San Francisco now working behind the cosmetics counter in a department store. Brian stayed clear of giving advice to Carrie where her family was concerned. He knew nothing about sibling dynamics and when it came to parents… Carrie was polite to hers, the perfect daughter as far as he could see. There seemed to be an invisible wall between Carrie and her mother, though. Maybe he recognized it because he sometimes felt that same wall between Carrie and him.
Suddenly Brian felt restless, much too wired to go to sleep. Sliding his hand from Carrie’s, he moved to the edge of the bed.
“Where are you going?”
“I have work to take care of before we go to San Francisco—a spreadsheet on property assessments.”
His wife was silent and he knew why. Nothing she could say would dissuade him from going to his office downstairs.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” she said softly.
Standing by the side of the bed, he was so tempted to touch her again.
But then she pulled the sheet up to her shoulders and turned over.
Brian snatched up his sweatpants from the bedside chair and left the bedroom, closing the door behind him.
Two
“Are you almost ready?” Brian called up the stairs on Wednesday morning.
Lifting her cosmetics case from the dresser, Carrie took a last look in the mirror at her sea-green pantsuit and went into the hall. “I’m ready. Are you in a hurry to get to the airport?”
“I’m initiating a conference call after we get through security. I don’t want to have to rush it.”
Ever since Monday night when Brian had made love to her so passionately, he’d seemed to withdraw. Sometimes she didn’t understand him, and she knew he didn’t always understand her. She marveled how when they’d first met, they’d seemed to be able to read each other’s minds. Where had that ability gone?
“I guess I’d better take along something to read if you’re going to be tied up.” She’d hoped they’d discuss their plans for the baby. She’d hoped—
As she descended the steps, the phone rang. Since Brian was already in the kitchen on his way to the garage with their luggage, she went to the living room and picked up the cordless phone. “Summers residence,” she answered automatically.
“Mrs. Summers, it’s Trina Bentley from Children’s Connection.”
“Hi, Trina. What can I do for you?” The caseworker probably needed yet another signature on something.
“I think I might be able to do something for you.”
Carrie’s heart began to pound. “Do you have a baby?”
Brian had returned from the garage and caught her question to the caseworker. Standing in the doorway, his gaze met hers.
“Not exactly, but a baby could be the end result.”
“I don’t understand.”
Obviously eager to explain, Trina went on, “What we have is an unwed mother who is homeless. Her name is Lisa Sanders. She’s been residing in a shelter for the past month. Yesterday she passed out, and one of her friends called the paramedics. In the emergency room, one of the nurses referred her to a social worker. When Lisa said she wanted to put her baby up for adoption, I was assigned to talk to her.”
“How old is she?” Carrie asked, thinking about how scared the young woman must be without a secure roof over her head.
“Lisa is eighteen and eight months pregnant. She’s been waitressing, but her blood pressure’s elevated. She has to slow down for her health as well as the baby’s. I gave her several portfolios to examine. She chose yours and that’s why I’m calling. As you know, the adopting couple often pays for the medical expenses for the mother of the child they’re going to adopt, and it would be true in Lisa’s case. We also need a couple who is willing to take her in until the baby’s born. Would you consider doing that?”
“I don’t know.” Carrie cast a worried glance at Brian. “We’d definitely be able to adopt?”
There was a short pause. “While Lisa is living with you, she could determine whether you and your husband are her choice to adopt her baby.”
“I see.”
“This isn’t as irregular as it seems, Mrs. Summers. All types of arrangements can be negotiated between mothers giving up their children and the adoptive parents. Do you think you’d be interested?”
Carrie was more than interested. For years she’d acted as a second mother to her three sisters, and she missed taking care of someone. Since she’d stopped modeling, she’d become more involved in volunteer work but there was still a hole in her life that needed to be filled. That hole had grown bigger since Brian’s success took him away from home more and more. Taking care of this teenager could fill some of the emptiness. It could also lead to the end result of becoming a mother.
“I have to talk to my husband about this. We’re on our way to the airport. How soon must I give you a decision?”
“As soon as possible. Lisa’s gone back to the shelter, but we’d like to get her out of there.”
“I’ll talk to Brian now and get back to you.”
“That was Children’s Connection?” he asked, sounding wary as Carrie replaced the cordless phone on its stand.
“Yes, it was Trina. We could have a baby in less than a month!” She couldn’t keep the excitement from her voice. “An eighteen-year-old unwed mother, Lisa Sanders, is living in a shelter and needs a place to stay until she has her baby. She’s chosen us as a possible couple.
Isn’t that wonderful?”
His expression and demeanor said that wasn’t his assessment of the situation. “Let me get this straight. A teenager who’s homeless wants to give up her baby. What do you know about her?”
“Not much…yet. But she doesn’t have anywhere to go, Brian.”
“We don’t know where she came from or what she’s been doing. We can’t just bring a stranger into the house.”
“Why not?”
Now he looked at her as if she’d totally lost her mind. “Because she might not be honest, she might do drugs, she might steal. Why is she on the streets? Why is she homeless? You can’t make a decision like this without having the right information.” He checked his watch. “And I don’t have time to get it now. We have a flight to catch.”
Ever since they were married, Carrie had supported Brian’s career. She loved him. If it was in her power, she’d do anything to make him happy. That had included giving up modeling and being available when he needed her. Since she’d learned she couldn’t have children, and since she hadn’t told Brian the real reason, guilt had kept her quiet about his long hours and his reticence to adopt a child as well as about how lonely she was. Now, however, she could envision laughter filling this big house. They had so much…and she’d love to help a young girl in need, not just with a roof over her head, but with emotional support. Carrie remembered how desperately she’d needed that after the rape, after her abortion, after her world had fallen to pieces all around her.
“I want to meet her, Brian.”
“I guess that will have to wait until we get back from San Francisco. Maybe you can make an appointment for Friday.”
“She’s homeless now. She needs a place to stay now.”
His brows drew together at her unexpectedly adamant tone. “I can’t cancel this trip.”
“I’m not asking you to cancel it, but I don’t have to go with you. If I call Brenda and explain, I know she’ll understand. I can see her another time. I can go meet Lisa today.”
A Precious Gift Page 2
