by Ash Mio
Will’s figure looks lonely as I walk away, standing by himself.
I got on the plane and went back to Japan. It was hot, the cicadas were noisy. The sun beat down on my face.
I walked as far as my street before I broke down and cried. The same sky wasn’t the same sky for us anymore. The same summer was not the same summer for us anymore.
Ch. 16 Will
It wasn’t a surprise, but things went back to the way they were before Hikari came to the states. Well for the most part. I made my mom some of the recipe’s Hikari left. And although it’s not as good as Hikari’s cooking, Mom still comes home to eat it when she doesn’t have a late shift or is eating with her boyfriend. Tonight, it’s just me.
It’s only been a week I think.
“Ginger, let’s eat.” Ginger whined. I scratch her face.
“I know girl. I miss him too.” The house feels empty again. I leaned back in my chair. Was the house always this big? It echoes.
A call came through my phone. The ring filled the open dining room. It was a video call from Hikari. I press the button in a panic and his face pops up on the screen.
“Hikari?”
“Will, I thought you’d be eating dinner at this time.” He giggled.
“Look.” He showed me his breakfast all set out on the table. “Let’s eat together.”
“Okay,” I agree readily. My heart suddenly feels light. It was lonely and heavy just a minute ago.
“Since the third trimester hasn’t started yet, I’m still on break…“ Seeing him through the phone was surreal like he never left.
We just talked about normal things about our days.
“I got a letter from Ryo. He says it’s boring playing video games by himself.”
“Hmm. I’d invite him over to play, but I don’t think I could handle the cheeky brat calling me a girly otaku again. “ We both laugh.
Whenever we could match up our meals, we would video chat. We’d also send pictures of our day. Hikari’s working at the dog café again. He sent a picture of him and Chibi getting along with the caption: “Chibi only lets me near him when I move my bangs.” I chuckle as quietly as I can during class. Chibi only likes good looking people. “Must be tough to be judged by a dog.” I type and send it.
“Will seems so different. He was like super cheerful with that foreign exchange student.”
“He’s gotten hotter.”
“He’s not that hot.”
I can hear you guys you know.
“Hey Will.” Lauren comes over to me in English class after the teacher gives us our instructions.
“Hey Lauren.” Lauren had changed a lot. She wore false lashes now and bright red lipstick.
“Can you help me with the assignment? You’re so smart.” She flirtatiously tucks her hair behind her ear.
“It’s a research essay Lauren. I don’t think I can help much.”
“Come on. Just a little bit? I can’t get the search engine to load.” Probably because you haven’t tried…How would Hikari reject her in this situation? He’d probably say something like “Are you a dumbass?” I try to keep a straight face. If I laugh, she might slap me again.
I miss Hikari.
I give her the instruction sheet. “Here. It’s a step by step.” She looked disappointed.
“Say Will, I was thinking we could try dating again. Maybe we like gave up too early last time?” A few people have asked me out since I got back. I always rejected them and then go and hug Hikari.
“I can’t. Sorry.”
She gives me a look “You know there’s a rumor going around that you and that foreign exchange student were going out? I mean you don’t want people thinking you’re gay and went out with someone so plain right? ” That made me a little bit angry. I grit my teeth.
“I’d appreciate it if you didn’t insult my boyfriend Lauren, and I’d also appreciate it if you never talked to me again. Also, he was a million times cuter than you.” She was stunned.
“Jackass.” She threw the paper back at me and left.
I sent Hikari a text later when I got home. “Lauren insulted my cute Hikari. I’m so mad.” Send.
“I’ve never seen you mad.”
“Well it happens on rare occasions like when someone insulted my dog.”
“Those bastards! I’d throw them in a river.”
“Haha. You aren’t strong enough or intimidating enough.”
“Shut up.”
“I want to see Hikari’s embarrassed face again. I think about it every time I have tomatoes.”
“Dumbass. That’s not something you should be waiting for. And stop thinking about weird things when you eat tomatoes.”
“But I wanna see. You always blushed every time I kissed you. You get so shy.”
“Idiot! I’m going to back to bed.”
“Are you red now?”
“….”
“Haha. Okay, sorry for teasing you. Good night Hikari.” I put my phone down and here another ping. Hikari took a photo and sent it with the caption: “Since you wanted to see it.” Half his face is covered by the pillow. He’s so shy about it. I stare at the phone for a while on my bed.
“I miss you.” I send the message.
“I miss you more.” He sends back.
“Mom’s doing well with her new boyfriend, so I don’t feel too bad about going off to college in Japan. Dad said he’d travel and visit me sometime.” Send.
“How many more months?”
“Too many.”
“The next 100 years right?”
“Yes.”
Ch. 17 Hikari
It’s been five and a half months since I returned from the states. Just. A. Little. More. Gahhhhh. I want to scream sometimes. The snow is starting to pile outside. It falls silently compared to my thoughts, which come in crashing, anxious waves.
“Hikari..”
I want to see him, I sighed.
“Hikari!” Mom wacks me with a green onion. “What’s with that attitude, you little shit.” She borrowed her favorite line from a new yakuza movie.
I respond with a sigh.
“You’ve been like this since you got back from America always spacing out.”
“Mmn.” Lately Will’s been texting less. Our conversations are becoming shorter and he’s having trouble waking up to “eat” with me.
Mom stared at me with a concerned expression. “ Ah. I’m so upset,” she says dramatically. “Hikari’s so gloomy that he might get dumped. What if Will doesn’t become my son in law? What should I do?” She pretends to cry. I snap my head up.
“How…how did you know?”
She gave me a look. “A mother’s intuition.”
I stared at her.
“And…I peeked in your room when you were sleeping in the same bed. It was just so gentle the way he held you. Mama really wanted to take a picture.” She fidgeted embarrassed. She covered her smirk with her hand. If I looked through the cameral roll, I wonder if I’d find that picture.
“In any case, there’s only a little time left before Will comes back. You have to welcome him with a smile or he’ll feel lonely.” She rubbed my cheeks. Her expression softened. “He wouldn’t want to see you like this, I’m sure.”
“Okay Mom.”
I tried to take Mom’s advice and went with Shun and Emi to a cat café to cheer up. Emi and Shun held hands as we walked to the café.
“Shun, you didn’t eat the cookies I made you.”
“I wanted to save them for later.”
“It’s not because you think they’re bad right Shun?” She asked suspiciously.
He jumped. “Of course not…” She looked like she was about to hit him. They fought a lot but they do love each other (probably).
Shun and I get along for the most part. He isn’t as bothered by me liking guys anymore. He even apologized again. I think Emi has been a really good influence on him.
Emi pulled Shun and me into the cat café. The cats were all fluffy and cute. There were
cats with stubby legs that liked to rub against my leg. Honestly, it did make me feel a little better. The cat purred and licked my thumb when I picked him up. He gave a cute little “meow.”
“Looks like the cat café was a good idea.” Emi said. “I was worried about you earlier when you said you didn’t want to read the new manga I bought you.”
“Yeah. Sorry about that Emi. I’m just anxious.”
“Just a little more. Hikari.”
“Yeah.” I keep telling myself that too, but sometimes I have this thought about some tanned girl in a bikini standing next to Will telling me she’s his girlfriend now. Or some cute guy with washboard abs standing next to Will saying Will’s his boyfriend now. For some reason, they always have abs.
Shun and Emi and I went our separate ways after the cat café since I had work.
I worked at Dog House 15 hours a week. I have more responsibilities now that Will wasn’t there. I cut the dog’s nails for the first time today. Oda-san supervised.
“Looks good. Even Chibi let you cut his nails.”
He sighed. The shop was doing well just not as well as it did last year with Will working here.
“There used to be hordes of female customers. I miss it. The profits.” He sighs deeply.
A familiar mother and son pair walked into the store. The kid had grown a little bit in a year.
“Can we play with one of the dogs?” The mother asked.
“Of course.”
“Okay Kota. Try to play with one.” Kota shyly went up to one of the beagles. He patiently waited this time and gently pet the dog. The beagle wagged his tail happily. Kota smiled. “Look mama!”
“Good job Kota!”
“Kota has really grown up.”
“He felt terrible about last time, so he said he’d make up for it this time.” His mother explained.
“He has really matured in a year.” I remember last year when we had to search for hours for Chibi because Kota scared him.
I think Will would be happy to hear about this…although, I’m not sure I should send him a message. Would he respond? I sigh and decide not to send the message.
Since it was December, our exams were coming up. Our classes were busy preparing for the end of term. People were also getting ready for the holiday season.
All I could do was study and wait. Eat and wait. Work. Wait…
On a bitterly cold day, we took our exams. We were shivering as we held our pencils because the heater was broken in parts of the school. I go through the exam mechanically. It was easy compared to waiting. We hand in our papers.
“Alright, exams are officially over. Have a great break everyone.” Sensei dismissed us and everyone happily celebrated around me. I sat quietly at my desk and watched the quiet snow pile on outside.
I put my scarf on and walked home as people played in the snow. It was beginning to get thicker. The streets were quiet except for the footprints and bicycle tracks that were left behind.
The rooftops had a thick layer of snow like the whipped cream on top of a parfait. I wonder if it’s snowing in the states. I wonder if Will is sleeping. I wonder if I can message him…I really want to see him.
Be patient. I think to myself. Just a little more.
The snow crunched under my feet and I sink in a bit. I looked at the scenery before me. My face was beginning to go numb. The white flurries blew passed me, brushing my face with a feathery touch. I tried to remember the cherry blossoms in the spring and how they blew like the snow. But before me, there was white and more white and….
a glimmer of gold.
I stop in my tracks.
In front of me, Will was standing in the snow waiting. His hair was powdered with white. His nose had turned red and he was shivering from the cold. When he saw me, he gave me the warmest smile. It felt like I could see the sun in springtime at that moment. He started running towards me. I ran and leapt into his arms. We kissed and held each other. He lifted me up and spun me a few times in the air. Then he put his forehead to mine. The numbness started melting away.
“I was trying to finish everything early so that I could come sooner.”
“Stupid, you could have called.” The hot tears burned as they trickled down. He wiped my cheeks.
“Sorry.” He smiled gently. “I wanted to make it in time for Christmas and New Year’s. I couldn’t miss your mom’s cake could I?” I laughed and wiped my face.
“We can finally see the cherry blossoms together.”
He smiled and hugged me.
“Tadaima Hikari.” [I’m home]
“Okaeri Will.” [Welcome home]
EXTRA CHAPTER
Note from author: I didn’t know where to put this extra story, so I just put it at the end. The timeline is sometime in the summer of Will’s high school exchange. It’s in Will’s perspective.
It’s our day off from school, so we decided to have a little date. When I told him how much I loved his food, he suggested that I learn how to make it. I ring the doorbell to his house and HIkari answers with a green apron on.
He smiles. “Welcome.”
I feel incredibly embarrassed for some reason like a husband who came home to his wife’s greeting. I definitely can’t tell him that. He’d probably curse at me. Although, when Hikari slips into his gangster speech, all I see is the cutest cinnamon roll talking or a tiny puppy barking. Back in the states there were these little Pomeranians that barked at everyone. I befriended them and they accepted me as their leader. They follow me around the dog park when they see me now.
“Sorry for the intrusion. Are your parents home? I brought some gifts. I picked it out with some help from the Tachibanas.”
“Thanks Mom’s going to love you even more.” Hikari takes the bag from my hand. “They’re actually visiting a relative and won’t be back until late.” Hikari turns red as he finishes his sentence. It’s too easy to know what he’s thinking, and it’s really fun to watch.
I clear my throat. “Shall we get started?” He nods shyly and hands me an apron.
“I thought we’d make takoyaki (battered octopus balls).”
He gets out a small scale and starts measuring the flour for the batter.
“I had no idea this recipe had to be so ….precise.”
“I want these takoyaki to be perfect for you,” he says as he spoons another kilogram of flour.
My face burns up a little. I’m really happy.
“Will do you want to boil the octopus?”
I look at the raw octopus with its tentacles and suction cups. It’s creepy when it’s still raw.
“No….could you do it Hikari?” He puts the octopus in boiling water without batting an eye.
“I’ll let you chop the green onions,” he says as he focuses on picking the best green onion stalks.
Hikari is so focused when he cooks. I want to tease him a little. I stand behind him and put my arms through. “Like this?” I chop the green onions while leaning over Hikari’s shoulders. He tenses up a little bit.
“It’s not necessary for me to stand here, “ he says. Even his ears are red.
“But you want to don’t you? Isn’t this like a staple scene in shoujo manga? Hikari probably fantasized about this right?” I press closer to him.
“I haven’t,” he insists. “I really haven’t!”
“Hmm, is that so? I guess I’ll just chop the green onions by myself then.” I chuckle as he escapes and checks on the octopus. He covers the pot and starts faning himself until his redness goes away.
We pour the batter on the special pan. It’s cast iron with semi-spherical cooking holes.
“Once they cook a little, you have to turn them to make them round.” He uses two skewers and expertly turns the takoyaki until it is a perfect sphere. He gives me the skewers to practice. I try to turn the batter but it doesn’t turn as easily as it looks.
“Mine’s so ugly compared to Hiakari’s.” He smiles.
“Here.” He cups his hands around mind an
d shows me how to flip them. We put them on a plate and drizzle sauce on it.
“Let’s take a picture.” Hikari shyly comes in for a picture. I grab his shoulder and pull him closer so that we’re shoulder to shoulder. The picture comes out really well.
Hikari picks up a takoyaki ball and holds it up to me. “You try first Will.”
“It’s like being fed by my wife.”
“Who’s your wife?” he fumes.
I take a bite . It’s gooey on the inside and crispy on the outside. “It’s really delicious. Can’t believe we made this.”
“I’m relieved they turned out so well.” He looks pleased with himself. “ What do you want for dinner?” he asks.
“Omurice!”
“Omurice?”
“I always see it in anime and want to try it.”
“Okay, we’ll make omurice then. Let’s go to the supermarket.”
“I’ll carry your bags.”
“What are you my husband?”
I grin.
After dinner, Hikari said that he’d get the bath ready for me since I was staying over.
“Say Hikari…isn’t it Japanese culture to take baths together?” Hikari nearly falls into the tub.
“They do in public bath houses.”
“…should we go?”
He looks at me dead serious in the face and grabs my shoulders. “Once you see saggy dicks, it will never leave your mind Will. You’ll be traumatized for the rest of your life. It’s too much for a westerner to handle. Even I have nightmares sometimes.”
“I see. Thank you for trying to protect my innocent eyes.”
“Innocent my ass,” He mumbles.
” Then how about we take a bath together just the two of us?” I try to put on the most serious face I can muster. His whole body flares up.
“Hell no!”
“Why not?” I ask matter of factly. “It’s normal no?”
“No, it isn’t! Where did you hear this from?”
“It’s not normal?” I sigh and try to look hurt.
Hikari looks like he’s about to die of embarrassment. I pat his head.
“I’m just kidding HIkari. I just thought it’d be a nice relaxing activity we could do together.”
