Rook

by Robin Roseau

  “She’s walking,” I said with a grin. “And perhaps there are no mountains, but Arrlottan horses are agile.” I turned to my daughters. “Dear Hearts,” I said. “I wish you to ride double. Nissi, please offer Marsana to Lady Malta.”

  “Yes, Mama,” she said, sliding from her mount. “Lady Malta, if you climb aboard, I’ll help you adjust the stirrups.”

  Unlike Parmeed, Malta didn’t try to argue. She slid from her mount then held the head of Parmeed’s, waiting for her wife to descend. One of Keelara’s soldiers hopped down and took authority over the two Framaran mounts.

  I slid from Zana, who snorted her displeasure, but I talked to her for a minute and told her we’d be heading up shortly. She clearly knew where we were, and I could see her excitement, even after our long travels.

  She loved Yahamala every bit as much as I did.

  Then I turned to Hamper and told him what a good boy he was. He turned to look as Parmeed stepped to his side, but he held still for her as she mounted. I handed up the reins but said, “Leave the reins loose and let him pick his path. He’ll follow Zana. Once we reach the top, please climb down smartly, as soon as it’s safe to do so, or be ready to hang on.”

  She said nothing to that, although her lips tightened a moment. I helped with the adjustments then checked on Malta. Nissi had done a fine job, and she was already mounted behind her sister, her arms around her sister’s waist and pressing against her back.

  I was so proud of both of them.

  I turned back to Zana, who was fidgeting like a young filly. She held still as I climbed aboard, but then she did a couple of spins, entirely without command from me, and I frowned. But then I announced, first in one language, then in two others, “Our Prestainamatta waits!” Then, for good measure, I said it in Arrlottan as well, for Hamper and Zana.

  * * * *

  We reached the top entirely without incident. Ahead, I saw the priestesses waiting, and aside, standing alone, Yahamala.

  I gave a cry but then turned a dancing Zana sideways. “Dismount now, Parmeed!”

  She slid down rapidly, and then I spun Zana and took off for the entrance. Hamper, of course, yanked the reins from Parmeed and took off after us.

  But my daughters, my lovely, lovely daughters, even riding two, beat us by a length, having taken a head start. And then they were both out of their saddles and running for the goddess before I could climb from Zana and race after them.

  Ahead of me, they threw themselves at her. She caught them both very easily and began to spin around and around, all three of them laughing in their joy. They rose into the air as I stood below them, looking up.

  I was filled with emotions, one of them jealousy. I had been preempted by my daughters. But I brushed that aside, replaced with my own joy and pride.

  Both girls began speaking to the goddess, stepping over each other in their combined rush to show her how much they had learned. Yahamala laughed and said, “One at a time, my lovelies. One at a time.”

  I called up a translation, in case they didn’t understand. Mandi nodded and said, “You first, Nissi.” I was so proud of her. First, she was letting her younger sister speak first, which was momentous in itself, but she had said it in the words of the Goddess.

  “Very good, Whitarmandi,” said the Goddess. “Darnisom, did you have a good voyage?”

  I translated that. Both girls nodded and then took turns telling her about our travels. Yahamala laughed with pleasure and offered small corrections when they struggled with a word.

  Well before they were done, I was flanked on both sides, Keelara and Evestía to my right, Parmeed and Malta on my left. All four were looking up. Evestía had seen this before, but the other three would only have heard about it.

  “She’s real,” Keelara said, her voice a whisper of awe.

  “You doubted me?” I said.

  “There’s something to be said about seeing the two princesses floating in the air,” she replied. “There is a goddess with them, right?”

  “There is,” I said.

  “I wish Alta were here,” Parmeed said.

  “As do I,” I agreed. “But I believe you have a special reason.”

  “I would have so many questions for her.”

  “Questions she can answer, but I can’t?”

  “I want an Altearan perspective. Do they keep shrines in their homes? How does our Prestainamatta fit into daily lives?” She rattled off several other questions, all showing renewed excitement. I laughed. “I can get you answers, Parmeed. I promise.”

  “I know you can,” she said. Then she pointed. “There’s a goddess there. Right there. Isn’t there?”

  I laughed again. “There certainly is.” Then I switched languages. “I do hope she hasn’t forgotten about me, now that she has my replacements.”

  Yahamala did her own laughing, spinning the girls more rapidly for a moment before slowing down as they began to descend. She steadied them on their feet and then said, “Let me greet your mother.”

  She turned to me and opened her arms. I ran three steps and threw myself at her, just like a little girl. We hugged and kissed, and rose into the air, turning more slowly than she had with the girls, and kissing me again. Then we looked into each other’s eyes. “Neither princess came.”

  “The doctor doesn’t want Lásenalta to travel.”

  “As if I would allow something to go amiss?”

  “I believe she was more worried about the travel, and not the stay once we arrived,” I said.

  “Is all well?”

  “The doctor seems confident, if Alta behaves. With Juleena watching her like a hawk, she has little choice.”

  “But she is well?”

  “She is well, Yahamala,” I confirmed. “I brought others.”

  “I recognize Captain Evestía,” she said. “And Lady Malta and Lady Parmeed came!”

  “They did,” I said. “They have a request for you.”

  “Are they prepared for my question?”

  “I believe you are to be pleased,” I said with a nod. Then I hugged her tightly again. She squeezed me back, and we murmured to each other like lovers recently reunited.

  Which I suppose we were.

  We kissed once more, a long, passionate kiss that left me breathless, and then I felt my feet upon the ground.

  “I wish to greet our priestesses first,” Yahamala declared, “and then our new guests.”

  “Of course.”

  She held out a hand to the girls, who ran and each offered theirs. Then we turned, and I found myself holding Nissi’s free hand.

  Vérundia and Hastiá had already exchanged their greetings and were now in their place. And so we started at the top of the line, which was now populated with Naddí and Féla. Larien and Terél were next, and then Vérundia and Hastiá and all the others.

  There were actually fewer than on many of our trips, but we were perhaps several days earlier than expected. And so I felt, deep inside me, to the link I shared with all the priestesses, and I smiled.

  So many were coming to The Heart. So many. It warmed me.

  We reached the end, the Goddess saying something to each of them present, every single one, and then we turned but said to the girls, “Stay here now.” She gave them each a little push towards the younger acolytes. The girls remembered them, and so more hugs were exchanged.

  Yahamala took my arm, and we turned to the visitors. Terél and Larien stepped back up to flank me, and so I knew I could stick to one language. I provided introductions, speaking the words of the Goddess, and then I echoed her replies. Larien translated in one direction, and Terél in the other, just as we had been doing for years.

  For her part, Yahamala greeted them, but her welcome was at first noncommittal. Parmeed was the most wide-eyed of the four, but neither Keelara nor Malta were entirely casual about it, and even Evestía seemed a little surprised to be greeting her own goddess.

  “Yalla,” said our Prestainamatta. “I wish to know if they hop
e to stay in my Heart?”

  “I have not spoken with Evestía,” I replied. “Parmeed and Malta have a request for you, and I believe Keelara wishes to know you better.”

  “If they wish to remain in my Heart, I wish permission to see into theirs. I will talk with each individually.” She paused. “I believe Evestía is easiest.”

  I nodded and this time switched languages. “She wishes a few words with each of you. Captain Evestía, will you walk with us?”

  We turned, the captain taking a spot alongside me, Terél making room for her. We walked only a short distance, looking outside.

  “It is so beautiful here,” I said.

  “It is,” Yahamala agreed. “Ask her what she desires, and you know the rest by now.”

  “I do,” I said. “Larien, please continue to translate.” Again, I shifted languages. “Captain, I believe my invitation surprised you.”

  “If you only invited me for balance…” she said slowly.

  “You’ve stood here before.”

  “It hasn’t been quite the same,” she pointed out.

  “Tell her I appreciate what she does,” Yahamala prompted.

  I echoed that and then said, “Did you hope to remain, or would you be more comfortable descending.”

  “Am I welcome?”

  I smiled. “If it is your desire to remain, then my next question is this: do you hold Our Prestainamatta in your heart.”

  “I do, High Priestess.”

  “We ask permission to see into your heart,” I said. The captain nodded, and so I stepped forward.

  It took only moments. What I saw was, well, complicated. Evestía normally seemed quite uncomplicated to me, but no one is truly simple. I saw a woman balancing multiple priorities, defending Alteara from those who would do her harm while trying to hold true to herself and to her goddess.

  Oh, but Yahamala was most definitely her Prestainamatta. That was utterly clear, but I could also see love for the royal family and for several others. Some of that was tinged with some bitterness, but she had done her best to set that aside.

  Finally I withdrew. Evestía looked rather stunned, but then she looked at me. “You have found peace with how you came here.”

  “Nearly so,” I agreed.

  “You mourn your mother.”

  I dipped my eyes for a moment then nodded.

  “She is welcome in My Heart,” Yahamala said. “Ask..” She laughed. “I was about to ask Vérundia to assign a priestess to her, but it should be Féla or Naddí.”

  “So Goddesses are not perfect.”

  “Don’t spread that around,” she replied.

  “Captain Evestía, our Prestainamatta invites you to spend our visit within, nestled in Her Heart.” We smiled at each other, and she thanked me. “We’ll talk more in the days to come.”

  She nodded and stepped aside.

  “Who is next, Yalla?”

  “The one you do not know, I believe,” I said. I lifted my voice. “Keelara?”

  The woman nodded and stepped forward. In the meantime, Yahamala said, “I know that name.”

  “I have mentioned her once or twice.” I explained who she was and then provided a formal introduction. Then I said, “Keelara, I believe you are still opening your heart.”

  “I-” I never saw her looking more uncertain. Then she knelt and held up her hands in supplication. “Prestainamatta, please, may I stay and learn of you?”

  “She kneels?” Yahamala said. She sounded surprised. “Ask her, Yalla.”

  “Keelara,” I said. “Would you allow us to see into your heart?”

  She bowed her head, and I thought she would refuse. Finally she said, “I’m afraid.”

  “Of what?”

  “That she’ll find me lacking.”

  “Make her stand, Yalla,” Yahamala said.

  And so I stepped forward and clasped Keelara by the elbows, pulling her upwards. She rose, and I set my hands in place. Keelara was trembling, but I smiled. “I won’t hurt you, Keelara. You can’t possibly be afraid of me. It’s me, the girl you once spanked.”

  “Maybe that’s what I’m afraid of, Yallameenara.”

  “Nonsense. Please, Keelara. Say ‘yes’.”

  She bit her lip, but then she nodded. “All right. Do it.”

  As soon as I brought forth the magic, the Goddess was there, her hands over mine, and I could feel her intent gaze.

  Keelara was, well, she was a mess. She had spent much of her life seeing the world as fairly simple. There were good people, and there were bad people. There were friends, and there were enemies, and unfortunately, it wasn’t always obvious who was which.

  But the world wasn’t simple, and Keelara was struggling to accept some of that. And she was struggling to fully accept our Prestainamatta, but she was trying, and that was clear.

  “I cannot see this, Yalla. Does she speak Altearan?”

  I asked the question, and I saw the answer. “Yes, but not well.”

  Yahamala drew my hands away. Both Keelara and I slumped for a moment. I straightened. She did not. I watched her then turned to the Goddess, who was watching me. “This woman is important to you.”

  “She is,” I agreed.

  “I believe, Yalla, that she is important to me as well. She has no husband.”

  “No, she doesn’t.”

  The Goddess nodded. “She must invite me further into her heart. Tell Larien, and this must be a secret mission for those closest to you, Yalla.”

  And so I turned to Larien and repeated the words of the Goddess. Larien nodded, and then a smiled turned into a grin. “We’ll speak with Naddí and Féla.”

  “Good.” I turned to Keelara. “Yahamala welcomes you into her Heart, Keelara.”

  “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you.”

  “We’ll talk more, but probably not for a day or two. Naddí and Féla will assign someone to help you get around. No wandering.”

  She laughed. “I heard that’s a good way to become terribly lost.”

  “I can vouch for that,” I said. Then Larien led her away, and I turned to the Goddess. “Together or apart.”

  “Malta first.”

  I nodded and called the woman over. She gave Parmeed a perfunctory kiss then hurried to stand before us, Larien on her heels, having delivered Keelara to Naddí and the others. “Lady Malta,” I said. “This is our Prestainamatta, the goddess Yahamala.”

  Malta offered a deep curtsey, and one far more refined than any I had ever offered. “She may look,” Malta said, preempting the question. “I don’t promise she’ll like everything she sees.”

  “I will see the woman who has done so much for us,” Yahamala replied. “Oh, do stand up.”

  Malta rose, and I stepped forward.

  Malta was, well, I wasn’t expecting to see an uncomplicated woman, and so I was surprised. Oh, she was certainly as complicated as anyone, but at the same time, she was so organized on one side and in such disarray on the other. But then we saw the space Parmeed held in her heart, and I smiled broadly.

  “Oh, Yalla,” Yahamala said. “Oh, look, Yalla. She doesn’t love me, but she loves you.”

  And there it was, my own image in her heart, and I took far more space than was right. She had such a view of me, one I didn’t feel was remotely justified.

  “She is here for you, and for Parmeed, far more than for herself,” Yahamala said. “But she has done so much for us.”

  “I couldn’t have made either temple without her help,” I said.

  “I know. Look here. She does not quite hold me as I would prefer, but she holds so many of my words. Do you see?”

  “I think I do, Prestainamatta,” I replied.

  “She must stay. She must. Now I wish to see Parmeed, but they must stay, Yalla.”

  “I believe that is their wish.” And so we withdrew. But I stepped closer and wrapped my arms around Malta. “I love you, too,” I whispered to her.

  “I know,” she said. “Yalla…” she tra
iled off. “Is she disappointed in me?”

  I laughed. “She forbids you to leave. We have weeks to bring you closer to her, and no other pesky responsibilities getting in my way.”

  Malta laughed somewhat raggedly then allowed herself to be led away, this time by Terél. Parmeed didn’t wait for an invitation. Instead, she gave Malta a hug in passing them half ran over to kneel.

  “Really, Yalla, what do you teach them?”

  “I teach them your words. If they want to kneel to you, who am I to stop them?”

  “I think you like that they are also kneeling to you.”

  “I do not!”

  “I think you do,” she said. She kissed me. “My girl of the Hippa. Tell her to stand now.”

  Parmeed accept the invitation then said, “Yes. She may look. I have so many more questions.”

  And so we looked, and this time I wasn’t surprised by what I saw. It was the Goddess who was surprised. “Oh, I wish I could have had her when she was younger. I would have changed her hair most certainly!” She laughed. “Do you see, Yalla? It is small, but love has taken root in her heart. And now we must help it grow.”

  “I bet you can guess what they would like?”

  “Their desire is clear.” She pulled my hands away. “They must both learn my songs for the celebration,” she said. “I will decide after.”

  Then she hugged me before spinning away. “Come. Come, my darlings!” She held her arms out to the girls, who ran to her. She gathered them, and then found a way to take my hand as well. Laughing, we ran for the Heart of the Goddess, then jumped into the open air.

  * * * *

  There was no Myrasieartet this trip. Oh, there was almost certainly lovemaking, but it did not involve any more magic than that between women. Instead, four of us descended to The Heart of the Heart. Yahamala invited us to sit upon the altar, and her joy was clear. She kept cuddling the girls, and while cuddling one, the other might lie down to use a divine leg as a pillow.

  We talked, sharing the news. I helped the girls to understand her, and so the conversation was slow, but full of joy.

  Then she looked at me. “What is most urgent?”

  “There are things that are important,” I said. “There is nothing that is urgent.”