by Tina Moore
“What are we playing baby?” You pass me a toy.
“Am I playing with kitty?” You shake your head and look at me, waiting for me to try again.
“Am I playing with mouse?” You giggle.
“No, Mommy!” You say, and I look at the toy you’ve given me.
“Am I playing with bunny?” You look at me like I’m silly and I tickle you making you squirm in my arms.
“It’s duck Mommy,” you said matter of factly making me laugh.
“How could I have not known. I’m a silly Mommy!” I say, and you look like I’ve just ran over a puppy.
“You’re not silly, Mommy. You are the best Mommy!” You are so cute when you defend me against myself. I lean against the wall and sip my glass of wine as you play. I love watching you; it makes me so happy to know that I give you all of this. That without Mommy here to love you, you would be sad and lonely and without me. I need you as much as you need me. I don’t tell you that often enough but I hope I show it loud and clear.
By the time bedtime comes around, you have made each one of your toys do a drawing, and you have cut them out and put them on a piece of sparkly silver cardboard. I have tried to take it from you multiple times, but each time you are adamant you aren’t finished. I know it’s just because you don’t want to go to bed, but I play along. You’ll be tired soon enough, and that’s when I’ll strike. You have run out of toys to get to do drawings and try to tell me that now each block has to do a drawing. I give you a look that makes you laugh hysterically, and you giggle as you try to convince me.
“I think someone is trying to lie to Mommy.” You shake your head as you giggle, not exactly convincing. I take your hands and pull you up, letting you grab bunny before I take you to bed. You’re such a good girl how to go straight into your nursery, assuming you’ll be in your cot tonight. You know that on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays you’re in your cot but tonight I want you with me. As I begin to tell you-you'll be sleeping with Mommy, you jump up and down and hold me tightly.
“I love you, Mommy,” you say as you grip my waist. I kiss your forehead and take you to the bathroom for teethies. You love to brush your teeth, but I help you finish off before I’m satisfied you’re clean. I put on some night cream, you’re youthful beauty doesn’t need any yet, and I pat your bottom indicating for you to go into bed.
You’re still struggling to get up, and I bring you your stool which you have forgotten about as I come out of the bathroom. You climb up, and I lay down, happy to be relaxing in bed. You come over to me, and before you can say a word, my nipple is in your mouth. This is why I wanted you here with me tonight. You suckle, and I hum you a tune as you are rocked in Mommy’s arms. Gosh, you are beautiful little baby girl. Such a sweet princess and so wonderful Mommy would be lost without you. I cut your time short on my left breast, wanting you to suckle from both and watch as you fall asleep. Jiggling you awake I hold my breast in my hand and stroke my nipple over your lips, making you open your mouth for Mommy again.
“Just a little more baby. I know you’ve got a full tummy, but Mommy needs you to drink just a little more.” I loving say as you begin suckling again. After I feel the tension release, I take you off and roll your sleeping body onto your side of the bed. I could have done that in your room, I suppose, but I am selfish and want you with me tonight. I place your blankie over your body and press bunny into your side as I begin to listen to a podcast.
I’m almost finished listening as I feel you startle. I take out my earphones and pat your back, thinking you are just having a nightmare. But you roll over, and I smile at you kindly.
“Come on, sweetie.” I take your hand and lead you to your changing room. You are so cute how you hate having a wet diaper. I knew that milk would be too much, but I don’t mind changing you. I’m secretly happy you woke up now and not in the middle of the night. I lay you down and take off your wet diaper, and you point to the star diaper, and I take it down for you.
“Is this the one you want baby?” You nod your head and begin to suck your thumb. I take your thumb away and put in your paci, and you coo sweetly behind it. I hadn’t realized you’d taken bunny and I accidentally kneel on her giving you have a mini heart attack.
“Oh I’m sorry baby girl did Mommy hurt bunny?” I pass you your toy, and you cuddle her on your chest as I wipe your clean and freshly powder you. I put you in your new diaper and put you back in your fluffy white onesie.
“All clean now, baby girl.” You clap your little hands, and I put you back in bed, letting you snuggle into me as I wrap my arm around you. You place your hand on my stomach and begin to rub my body.
“Are you feeling Mommy, baby?” You nod. I secretly hope you like how I feel. I would never tell you that you make me insecure sometimes. There are so many younger Mommies, and I sometimes wonder if you would prefer to have one of them instead of me. You give me little kisses along my neck and onto my cheek, and all my insecurities are washed away.
“I love you baby girl, do you know that?” You giggle, and I melt as you tell me how much you love me back.
“Mommy loves you,” is the last thing you hear before you fall asleep in my arms.
Tuesday
I wake to the sound of birds chirping outside my window. I feel around in my bed and remember that I put you in your cot in the middle of the night. You had woken to a bad dream, and I took you to your room and lay with you until you fell asleep. Not because I didn’t want you with me for the whole night, but because Mommy wanted to do naughty things that babies shouldn’t be around for. I had assumed you were still in your cot until I hear you turn up a song in our gym as you slam down some weights. I like that you keep yourself in shape. It makes playtime more fun when I know I can put you into a whole lot of different positions. You come back into my room quietly thinking I am still asleep.
“Hi, there, sweetheart.” You look up, surprised to see me staring at you and smile.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Mommy, I didn’t mean to wake you,” you reply, looking as though I’ve caught you doing something naughty. I’d usually want you to come and cuddle with me, but you’re all hot and sweaty from your workout. Your exercise clothes look like something from a porn movie. You wear tiny shorts that barely cover your ass and a tight singlet without a bra. You weren’t running today. You’ve taken off your gym shoes and are just wearing your knee high sports socks, and your hair is in its usual messy ponytail. I love it; you look so beautiful standing there. My face must have given me away because I see a mischievous gleam in your eye begin to sparkle.
“Do you think I’m pretty Mommy,” you say as you turn for me. I nod, enjoying the show you are putting on and sit up to get a better view. You slowly take off your singlet, and I smile, seeing your pierced nipples. I remember when you got them done. It wasn’t because I told you to, you’d done it because you wanted to be sluty for Mommy. You’re always sluty for Mommy. You turn around and roll your socks down next and walk over to me and take my hands in yours.
“Do you want to take them off, Mommy?” You ask in your sluty grown-up voice. I shake my head no, and you break out of your seduction, confused at my response. I can’t help myself and laugh at your confused look, clearly unable to believe I’d refuse you.
“I want you to show me, baby,” I say, giving you clarification. Your eyes light up as you go back to teasing me as you take your shorts off showing me your ass. I lean over and grab one of your cheeks firmly, my desire coming out in the intensity of my grab making you gasp.
“Don’t tease Mommy if you can’t handle the consequence baby,” I say in a husky aroused voice. You know that voice well and lie down on the floor and begin masturbating in front of me. You know I love to watch you, I always have. I even love the way other people stare at you, how they want you as you flutter around a room. What I love most is the way you always land right back on my lap, like the good girl you are. I watch you and nod as you look to me wanting to cum and you arch your back and shudder as
it races through you. I watch as you go back for more but stop in a breathless whine as I shake my head no.
“Have a shower then make Mommy a coffee baby girl. I want to stay in bed a little longer today,” I instruct you as you pick up the trail of clothes and head into my shower. I roll over and must have fallen back asleep because I’m woken by the smell of coffee and realize you have gone from the room. Getting up, I take off my pajama’s and get dressed for work. I have an event tonight and will be working late so you’ll be home alone for most of the evening. I go into your room and put notes with instructions and cute little messages around and head to the kitchen.
“Fancy Mommy,” you say as you see my outfit. I have a cream-colored skirt and my new purple designer blouse I couldn’t walk past last time we went into the city together. I left one button, extra undone, and the material gapes elegantly around my diamond necklace. I have opted for matching cream heels and a sophisticated gray coat with cream fur around the collar and base of the arms. I look in the mirror and smirk at myself. Yes, very fancy, I think as I take the coffee, you have made me. You bought me this coat with the first paycheck you got when you started your new job. It was your first two paychecks if memory serves me and you had it delivered to my work with a big bunch of roses and a card. You made me feel so special having all the partners of the firm question who my mysterious lover was. I enjoyed watching them try to guess who it could be. I don’t take you too many work events, mostly because I am a shark in that world and I don’t want my baby to see how vicious Mommy can be or how much I enjoy being.
You’ve made yourself some toast, and I cut it up for you as I make you an egg.
“Mommy is going to be home very late today sweetie. I’ve laid out everything I want you to do here,” I say, sliding a sheet of paper across the kitchen bench. You read it a few times and get excited each time you read that you can have take out for dinner.
“Nothing over $20 though baby, I’m not trying to have you hyper when I get back,” I always give you a limit to how much you can spend. I learned that after I mistakenly said you could ice-cream, and you bought $40 worth of it. I’ve learned with you that if there’s a loophole, you’ll find it. You smile at me cheekily and roll your eyes playfully.
“Now I’m serious baby. There’ll be trouble if those things aren’t done how I want them.” I’ve given you time frames when everything needs to be done and demanded a photo of the completed task. The one I think you’ll struggle with the most is getting off your phone by 9 pm. You’ve tried all sorts of excuses as to why you needed to be online past 9, all of which I have happily punished you for. One time you even tried to tell me that your boss called you and you were so shocked when I rung your boss to ask. You were punished particularly hard for that one; I hate lying.
I pack your lunch in your backpack and fix your tie for you almost ritualistically and push you out the door. I hold your hand as we walk along the garden path to the car. I open your door and buckle you in pulling the seat belt extra tight and looking at you like you’re my prey.
“Mommy don’t,” you say blushing and pushing me away. I laugh and kiss you, and you almost pull me into the car with you as you wrap your arms around my body. You are so strong; I love it. I break the kiss and turn the car on, backing out of the driveway and onto the road.
I drive in silence, I’ve got so much on my mind, and I am mildly aware you are looking at me. I can feel your eyes on me; I could almost swear they are undressing me, and I like that I make you want all of me.
“What are you thinking about Mommy?” You ask as you lift your legs and pull them to your chest. I quickly slap them back down and squeeze your thigh firmly. As if I want your shoes on the cream leather. I look at you warningly until you look away I’m not letting you win this power battle baby.
“Don’t,” is all I need to say for you to curb your attention seeking behavior. You look out the window in annoyance that I don’t let you be a brat. You’ve started that lately, I think it’s the influence of another baby you met at a party a while back, that same one you were so excited to introduce me to yesterday, what was her name? Amy, I think. You turn back towards me; maybe you remember what happened the last time you tried that shit on me.
“Sorry, Mommy, I’m going to miss you tonight,” you say submissively. I smile at you with a raised eyebrow.
“I know sweetie. You don’t need to be a naughty girl, though. I’ve left you little notes around the house that I want you to find, and I’ll be home to tuck you in tonight. Mommy won’t be gone for long.” I forget how clingy you are sometimes. When you are a big girl, you are so independent and in control, but the minute you’re my baby girl, you want to be attached to me constantly. I don’t hate it; I hate how it makes you feel when you can’t have me constantly. I know it makes your little heart hurt and I know that I try to overcompensate on treats on these nights to make it easier for you.
“You can watch whatever movie you want to watch tonight, baby,” I say making you give a faint smile. We arrive at the train station, and I get out of the car and come around to your side. You are trying to act tough, but I catch the little tear which escapes your eye.
“There there come to Mommy princess it’s going to be alright. You will have a good time, and I’ll be home before you know it,” I say as I hold your face to my cleavage and hold you close, stroking your hair and feeing your fast heartbeat.
“I know. See you later, Mommy,” you say as you hear your train pull up. I quickly kiss you savoring the taste of your strawberry chapstick and let you run over the road and jump on the train just as the doors shut. I wait and wave as you go and hope you make it through the day. You are so little sometimes I wish we could stop the world and stay in our space.
The first message I receive from you is a topless selfie I requested at 5 pm. I’m in a taxi on the way to the event, and I feel my phone vibrate, and I knowingly smile in satisfaction at what I’m about to see. I open it and am not disappointed. Your beautiful body on display for me your pierced nipples hard and ready to be played with. I put my phone back in my pocket and settle back into the taxi seat. This will be a lovely evening; I tell myself as I arrive at the venue. My assistant is waiting out the front with a change of outfits, and I follow her as she leads me to a private suite I have arranged. It would be so wonderful if you could be here. I’d let you play with your stuffies while Mommy worked knowing that my cute little princess was close by. Unfortunately, it is just my work slave and I here, and she is boring me with the details of the evening. I dismiss her and send you a message seeing you online. Hi baby, Mommy can’t wait to come home to you. Have you been a good girl and picked up your dinner? Tell Mommy what you got, I write. You reply in no time at all telling me about your day and what you’ve bought for yourself. I enjoy reading how proud you are that you managed to buy three cheeseburgers and an extra large chocolate shake with change to give Mommy when I get back. I laugh out loud at your message knowing full well you’re going to have a stomach ache in about half an hour. I put my phone down and go to freshen up before dressing in my evening dress and make my way downstairs.
It’s 10 pm by the time I look at my phone again, and I am impressed with the array of messages I have received. You’ve done everything I have asked you to. The toys are away, you did give yourself a tummy ache like I knew you would, but you’ve had a bath and are all tucked up in bed ready for me to kiss you goodnight. I have half a mind to leave the event early to come home to you, but I stay an hour longer and mingle some more.
I arrive home and find you already asleep in your cot. You have dressed in your pink thigh high socks and fuzzy grey bear onesie. You’re sucking on the aqua glitter paci I was saving for a special occasion, but I guess you found it. Your hair is untied, and I like how to falls down your back along your onesie. You look so cute with your diaper sticking out a little bit from under your onesie and I tuck it in neatly making you wake up.
“Mommy,” you say excitedly althou
gh half asleep. I smile down at you, and you sit up, holding your arms out to me.
“You smell like aircon and man perfume,” you say as my hair falls onto your face.
“Really? I thought I smelt like money and Mommy’s perfume,” I reply. Working in a male-dominated industry, it’s not surprising that you thought I smelt like them. Their cologne is almost laced into the walls at work.
“I better shower then so you don’t get confused about who I am baby,” I tease and take you out of the cot. You sit on the bathroom floor as I shower and I put on a little show for you making you giggle. It’s so nice to come home to you after having such an aggressive day. I don’t mind you staying up late tonight; you don’t have work tomorrow so you can sleep in with me. I’ve taken the morning off as well, and I can’t wait to play with you in the morning.
“Mommy, can I please sleep with you tonight?” You ask. Your hair has fallen either side of the onesie bear hood you have put on your head, and I honestly can’t think of seeing anything cuter than you right now. I nod, and you excitedly clap your hands and hand me my towel as I turn off the shower water. I don’t bother with pajamas tonight; I know you’ll be suckling on me before too long anyway.
I lift you onto the bed and hear my phone ring. It’s my bloody assistant. I answer it and hold my finger to your lips so you’ll be quiet. I lay down and take your wrist, pulling you towards me and hold your mouth to my nipple. I’m answering her multiple questions while enjoying nursing you quietly as she talks my ear off. You giggle, and I look down at you excitedly, I love how cheeky you are, and I know you love this. I know it makes you feel like Mommy has put you first. I’ll always put you, first baby; Mommy still needs to work though. I move you to my other breast and pat you as you nurse. You are more interested in playing with my nipples tonight than filling your tummy, which is understandable, you gorged yourself on takeout a few hours earlier. I hang up the phone and take you off me instead of wrapping you in my arms. I put on a bra, so I don’t leak milk all over your pretty onesie and lay you on top me as I stroke you.
