by MJ Fredrick
“What do you mean she can’t love you because of who you are?” Jen searched for the nurse call button, finally slapping all the buttons on the side of the bed.
“I’m a Hot Shot and she can’t handle it.” Where were his clothes? Did they carry him out of the chopper naked, for God’s sake?
“She didn’t get that you were a Hot Shot?” Jen asked dryly. “I thought she’d figured it out. She seemed smart enough to me.”
Why bother to explain it? He had to get to Peyton, before she left the hospital, make her understand she was more important than his damned job. God knew Dan didn’t let her know it. “Her husband was a cop killed in the line of duty. She needs someone safe.”
“So if you go after her, what will you tell her?” Doug asked.
Gabe glared at his once best friend who stood in front of the door, felt a twinge of regret that it couldn’t be the same. He swayed on his feet and felt a catch in his lungs. “Whatever she wants to hear.”
“You want a woman who can’t love you because of who you are?” Jen wanted to know. Gabe sat back on the bed and clutched the edge of the mattress as coughs gripped him. “There’s irony. And you always accused me of trying to change you. Peyton did it with a flip of her ponytail.”
A nurse rushed in. All she had to do was push him to make him fall onto his back, he was so weak. Damn it to hell.
“Gabe?” Jen drew his attention as the nurse fussed over him.
“I love her, Jen,” he said between coughs. “I didn’t think I could again.”
The tenderness on her face warmed to amusement. “A reporter, huh? That must’ve been a slap in the face.”
He narrowed his eyes at her, but doubted he was very intimidating in his little hospital gown. “Isn’t that what you intended? Did you give her to me to hurt me, Jen?”
Her eyes widened, like she was shocked he would think that of her. “No! She wanted the best, and you were the best I had.”
Gabe lifted his brows and inclined his head toward Doug. Jen had the grace to redden, and he felt a momentary twinge for making her uncomfortable. She was here for him, after all. And she’d done everything in her power to help him get to Peyton. He couldn’t figure out where the mercy he felt came from, because he hadn’t been feeling very merciful when she and Doug walked in, interrupting his last moments with Peyton.
“The best crew chief. You know what I meant.”
“Sure I do. No other motive? Like punishing me?”
Her eyes softened as she looked at him. “None other. You’re the best at what you do. I’d be happy to work with you again.”
Gabe appreciated her recognition of his ability but no longer craved her approval. Still, he didn’t know what to say.
Jen seemed to understand. She sat back. “I had to come thank you, Gabe. For bringing Doug back, for risking everything to help him. I know it wasn’t easy.”
He took a deep breath to reply. He had some issues of his own to clear up before he ran after Peyton.
But Jen, as usual, ran over him. “I’ve made some big mistakes, but I’m learning what’s important.” She curved a hand over her belly, put her other hand in Doug’s.
Gabe battled the pain, not as sharp as it had been. He had to make an effort, put this behind him. “Look, I wasn’t thinking about you when you told me you were pregnant.”
She shifted in the chair and studied her hands. “I hardly expected you to jump up and down, but I wanted you to hear it from me.”
“No, I—look. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy.” He glanced at the door as if half- expecting to see Peyton walk back in.
Jen didn’t miss it, but she didn’t comment. “That’s very adult of you,” she said.
“Yeah, I’m all grown up now.” He was rewarded by her laugh, dragged a hand over his face and grimaced at the growth of stubble. He had to say it, had to put it in the past or he couldn’t move forward, couldn’t go after Peyton. “You’ll be a great mom.” The hell of it was, he meant it. Jen would give motherhood the focus she’d given her job. And she and Doug loved each other. Their children would grow up understanding that. But now, when he pictured his own children, their mother was Peyton. God. Another jab to the heart.
“Cut it out, Gabe.” Jen pressed her fingers to her eyes. “You’ll make me cry.”
Gabe glanced at Doug in alarm. “You don’t cry.”
“Hormones,” Doug said with a casual wave of his hand. “You can’t talk to her anymore.” Gabe relaxed marginally. “As long as it wasn’t me being nice.”
She snuffled a watery laugh. “Trust me, that’s more shocking than anything. Listen, I’ve decided to finish out this season, but they’re going to need another good man in management. If she doesn’t like you being on the fire line, maybe that’s something to consider. I’d be happy to recommend you.”
He waited for the resentment. Still trying to change him. But it didn’t come. Hell, he even considered it—for about a second. It might be nice to have some control and not run up a damn mountain. He was getting old for this.
She stood and bent to kiss his cheek. He closed his eyes to brace himself against the onslaught of emotions but instead felt—warmth. Just warmth and affection toward the woman who had ripped his heart out. He opened his eyes to meet Doug’s. Doug nodded his acknowledgement of the change in Gabe and slipped his hand around Jen’s elbow to lead her outside.
Jen paused at the door. “Don’t let her walk away, Gabe. Not if you love her.”
No, he wouldn’t let her, he decided, as the nurse worked to repair the damage he’d done with the IV. He’d made that mistake once.
A knock sounded at the door not long after Jen and Doug left. An older man who looked more tired than Gabe felt stepped inside. “I’m Agent Devlin, FBI. Are you up to talking to me about Kim and Kevin O’Doul?”
What the hell kind of invalid did the man think he was? Gabe sat higher in the bed, wishing he’d had the foresight to move to the chair. He didn’t want to project any kind of weakness. Bad enough he’d had an arsonist on his crew and hadn’t suspected.
“I don’t know what I can tell you.”
Agent Devlin stopped beside his bed, consulted one of those flip notebooks. “According to your crew, Kim was closest to you.”
Gabe shifted. “She hung around a lot. I wasn’t her confidant, or anything.”
Devlin nodded. “It can happen. But maybe she said something to you to help us locate her and her brother. We’ve tracked down every member of her family, no one has seen her, no one will tell us where she might have gone.”
“I don’t know what I can tell you,” he said again. It wasn’t like he hadn’t thought about it. The woman had nearly killed Peyton, after all.
“Try.”
Gabe sighed and rubbed his forehead. “She’s from back east. Her parents didn’t want her to do this job, thought it wasn’t feminine.” Huh. Almost sounded familiar.
And shit. That was what it was. That was what had bugged him about her burn story. She’d said she was cooking with her mother. She didn’t even like her mother.
Goddamn, he was an idiot. Why hadn’t he been more suspicious? Bev would be alive.
“Why did she join anyway?”
“I’m not sure. I think she washed out of college. She’d wanted to be a zoologist or something, an outdoors kind of thing, but she couldn’t get the hang of—damn, I don’t remember. Some biology class.”
“It’s a leap going from zoologist to firefighter.”
“She was a ranger for a bit, with the fire seasons so bad lately, she was drawn to it.”
Devlin looked up. “You don’t think she started any of the fires you worked on before, do you?”
Gabe jolted. “No. No, she couldn’t have.”
“Why not?”
Why not? She’d started this fire when he’d had no clue. How did he know she hadn’t started others? “They say she did this to get me to pay attention to her.”
“Who said?”
/> “Peyton Michaels, the woman Kim attacked on the mountain, told my ex, Jen Sheridan.”
Agent Devlin consulted his pad with a graying eyebrow quirked in amusement. “The woman you were sleeping with told your ex-wife one of the women on your crew was in love with you.”
Didn’t that make him sound like a player. The blunt words grated on Gabe’s nerves, but he didn’t correct the man.
“Ms. Michaels is returning to Chicago, right?”
Chicago. Gabe hadn’t known where the woman he claimed to love was from. She hadn’t been forthcoming, and damn it, questioning her about it had seemed too needy. He planned to find out, though, as soon as he got out of here.
“She left a couple of hours ago,” he admitted.
“I’ll get in touch with her again. Now, you know Kevin as well?”
Gabe resented the new direction of the conversation. “Very distantly.”
“You spoke to him just days ago. What indication did he give to raise your suspicions?”
“What do you mean?”
“Jen Sheridan said you suspected it was Kim the minute you saw the list you’d had her get of firefighters who had been in the area when the fire started. Did you suspect Kevin before you saw his name?”
Gabe shook his head. “Nothing jumped out at me till then. His hatred for Doug Sheridan when I talked to him this week was over the top. I mean, Doug’s a pretty mild-mannered guy. Most everybody likes him.”
“Except you.”
He rubbed a thumb between his eyebrows. “Yeah, well, I had good reason.”
“He stole your wife.”
“Glad you have all the gossip,” Gabe muttered.
Devlin shifted. “I do have to wonder why you were so all-fired anxious to clear his name when he was such a shit to you.”
Because that’s what heroes do, according to Peyton. “I knew he couldn’t have done it.”
“But you didn’t feel the same about Kim?”
“I didn’t want to believe it was a firefighter at all. I wasn’t convinced it was Kim till she hurt Peyton.” The memory rose up, dragging anger with it, choking him with it. Because he’d trusted Kim, so had Peyton. She’d almost died because of it.
“Do you have any idea where Kim could be now?”
Gabe shook his head. “I wish to hell I did. I’d bring her in myself.”
*****
Peyton tapped a rolled-up flyer against her thigh as she waited in the Missoula airport for her flight home. The news of the fires played in a continuous loop on the TVs throughout the waiting area. Every yellow shirt reminded her of Gabe, every shot of flames reminded her of how they’d almost died.
Being dead would almost be preferable to the pain twisting in her. She was paralyzed with a grief similar to what she’d felt when Dan died. The terror of seeing Gabe unconscious and unable to help him left her off balance.
Now she’d lost him anyway thanks to her unwillingness, as always, to risk herself.
She didn’t have the courage to change her mind.
If she’d known, when she met Dan, that their time would be limited, would that have stopped her from falling in love with him? She dropped her head to her hands, squeezing her eyes shut, seeing the big charming man she’d adored, she’d married.
She hadn’t had a choice then. The emotion, the joy had swept her up; she hadn’t known enough to be scared. What she wouldn’t give for that innocence now.
She twisted the flyer tighter—a picture of Kim and Kevin, crudely drawn, that someone had handed her as she walked into the airport. As if she’d ever forget what they looked like. Still, they wouldn’t hang around this firefighter town. Surely they weren’t so dumb.
The theory—her theory, anyway—was Kim had done this to get Gabe. She’d started the fire to get his attention, then set up his nemesis, and finally, tried to kill his lover. But Peyton hadn’t played the idea through, to figure out what might happen next. What would Kim do if she got what she wanted? Peyton was out of the way, Gabe was free. Would Kim walk away if he was what she’d worked toward?
No. Kim would go after Gabe. And as little as she was, Gabe was in no shape to resist her.
Peyton scrambled through her pack for her cell to call Agent Devlin to relay her fears, but her battery was dead. Of course. Where had she been able to plug it in? She tossed it back into her pack and dug for change, but again, she’d had no use for money in fire camp, and all her cash was in bills.
She had to call the hospital, the police, someone. She pulled out a twenty, tugged her pack over her shoulder and ran to the gift shop. She grabbed a bar of chocolate, paid, then rushed back to the bank of pay phones. Three of the four were occupied, and the fourth out of order. How could that be? Didn’t everyone have cell phones these days? She shifted in impatience but no one on the phones took the hint.
She could get to the hospital herself faster. Once she made the choice, she raced out of the terminal.
*****
A soft hand stroked Gabe’s jaw, waking him. “You came back.”
Lips brushed over his. Not Peyton. He opened his eyes to see Kim standing over him, startling in dark hair, smiling. Every ounce of will kept him from jerking away.
“You knew I would,” she murmured, moving closer, her breasts against his arm. “Now we can be together. I love you, Gabe. True love, not like Peyton.”
His mind raced. Telling her no way in hell was probably not the smartest thing, so he tried for an all-business tone. “You have to turn yourself in.”
Her expression tightened and she moved back a little. “I won’t. We have a place. We’ll be happy there, the three of us. You’ll love it, Gabe. In the mountains, surrounded by the forest.”
“Till you set fire to it,” he muttered, and attempted to sit, but his head swam. What the hell? Peyton had said he wasn’t that bad off. Why couldn’t he sit up?
And then he saw the syringe in Kim’s hand, the plunger depressed, the cylinder empty. The IV cord still swayed from her tampering as the sedative flowed into his system.
She’d drugged him. Yeah, true love.
Chapter Eighteen
Peyton raced into the hospital after tossing another twenty at the cab driver. She stumbled into a nurse but didn’t look back, didn’t apologize, as she headed for the elevators, slapped the up button. Adrenaline had her muscles quivering till the doors slid open and she stepped inside.
She would be between Gabe and Kim now. She snorted a little laugh. Being in that position had started this to begin with.
Now she needed to worry about what to say to Gabe. She had four more floors to figure out whether she was back for good.
Who was she fooling? She couldn’t walk away from him twice. Once had been hard enough.
Again her thoughts drifted to those early days with Dan. Would she have walked away, knowing the pain she’d suffer when he died? Maybe. Maybe she’d have been able to. But look at what she would have missed, his energy, his big personality, his love.
What would she miss if she walked away from Gabe now?
She’d told herself he didn’t love her, she’d only known him a week.
But no man jumped out of an airplane when he hated to fly. No man risked his life for a woman he didn’t love.
And she’d been such a coward, she’d left him at his lowest point.
She didn’t deserve him. But God, she wanted him.
The doors slid open on the fourth floor and she turned toward his room. Before reaching the door, she sensed something was wrong, and she would have more time to decide what to say.
His bed was empty, the sheets rumpled, a streak of blood across the pillow.
Peyton pivoted toward the nurse’s station. “Where is Gabe Cooper?”
A young nurse in Betty Boop cartoon print scrubs didn’t look up from her paperwork. “They took him to x-ray.”
Peyton’s heart rate slowed a fraction. “Where’s that?”
“First floor, turn right when you get off the elevators,
end of the hall,” the girl said as if she’d said it a thousand times.
“Thank you.” Peyton turned back to the elevators, but couldn’t shake the unease. Maybe it was just the uncertainty of making up with Gabe, worry over his reaction to her return. God, she really hoped that was what caused her anxiety.
But when she reached x-ray, the tech told her Gabe had been in earlier. No one knew where he was. She checked with admissions, had the girl there promise to page his doctor to see if Gabe had left against medical advice.
Maybe she had this all wrong. Maybe Gabe had been pissed off and left.
Maybe—her heart bumped at the thought—he’d come after her.
Agent Devlin strode through the sliding glass doors as she walked out of admissions, trying to decide what to do next. She’d had the cabbie call the agent on her way back to the hospital, but what if it had been for nothing?
But no, her instincts were good, usually. Kim would come after Gabe, she was sure. Whether or not Gabe would be here was another issue.
She approached the agent, grateful to have someone with whom to share the burden.
“I thought you’d gone home,” he said.
“I changed my mind. I started thinking Kim wouldn’t walk away and I did...” She trailed off. He didn’t want to hear this. “Any word on Kim?”
He shook his head.
“Have you talked to Gabe?”
“I have. Maybe an hour ago.”
Hope surged. Not much could happen in an hour, could it? “Because he isn’t here now.” She explained what had happened. “When you talked to him, did he seem like he was ready to leave against medical advice?”
“No, ma’am, but he was stewing a bit.”
Her face heated. “Does this hospital have security cameras?”
He grinned and lifted his gaze over her head.
At the camera pointing right at the door he’d come through.
*****
Peyton watched the bank of six screens in frustration as she, Agent Devlin and a security guard ran through video of the past two hours. The camera Agent Devlin had pointed out was great for seeing who entered the hospital, but worthless for seeing who left. However, a camera in the parking lot was better.
