by Vanessa Jaye
“I’m sorry, son. I didn’t think she was right for you.” His father touched his shoulder. Eventually Daniel covered the hand with his own.
Daniel took a moment to collect his thoughts, and when he spoke, his voice was calm. “You know, Dad, you have to stop thinking for me.” He looked at him. “You raised me to think for myself. To have goals, go for them and never quit. To be a man both you and Mom can be proud of. A man like you.” He gripped his father’s hand harder.
“You did your job. Now let me do mine. Let me be that man. I have my own goals I want to achieve. Rob and I more than doubled our business in the last year. And next year’s forecast is looking even better.”
An edge crept into his voice. “I may have quit the law firm, but I didn’t quit on you. I gave it an honest try, and I always did my best. You know that.”
He saw the admission was hard in coming, but finally his old man got it out. “I know.”
“I tried to please you, Dad. Make you happy. Now you have to accept what makes me happy.”
The silence stretched between them. He let his father think about what not accepting would mean, while he recalled his own fatal mistake, uttered earlier. “I can’t accept you.”
He ground his teeth together. Non-acceptance was the reason she’d left her parents house, but he’d been too stupid, caught up in his own shock, to really hear what she’d been saying.
Now he was drawing his own line in the sand.
“This won’t be easy.”
Daniel released the breath he’d been holding. “No.”
“You’re asking me to give up a dream.”
He shook his head slowly. “I’m asking you to share one.”
His father stared into Daniel’s eyes for an eternity. The old man’s mouth tightened, he swallowed and blinked quickly then squeezed Daniel’s shoulder. And he left.
Daniel sighed, and looked back over the lake. Not the hug he was looking for, but no more angry words either.
It was a start.
***
“Oh, I just love this story.” Lise chuckled.
Felicity glared at her from the corner of her eye before refocusing, sort of, on the fairytale. Personally, she was rooting for the evil witch.
Lise seemed to be in extra high spirits today, and it was getting on Felicity’s nerves. She couldn’t help wondering if Lise’s perk!perk!perkiness had to do with her son’s engagement. But she wouldn’t ask.
She’d made it plain a week ago that the topic of Daniel, and why she’d left the condo, was off limits. Surprisingly, neither Daniel nor his father had told Lise about her stripping. Felicity wasn’t sure how she felt about their silence, but she’d take her small blessings where she could.
“You’re drifting, sweetheart, and we’re getting to the best part. The happily-ever-after,” Lise chided. Perkily.
Like the type Daniel was going to have with VD?
She concentrated really, really hard on not letting one single tear fall, clearing her throat before she continued to read.
“The end,” she said triumphantly many minutes later and sat back.
Lise, however, wasn’t paying her any attention, instead she craned her neck to look over her shoulder. “Oh—what? You finished? Great!” She jumped up. “Looks like the ladies’ room is free now. Start the next story, read silently until I get back.”
As Lise slipped away, Felicity stared at the book without an ounce of enthusiasm. One thing for sure, these sessions had become sheer torture. She could barely concentrate past the constant ache that massaged her heart, and how many times did she bite back a question about Daniel, hungry for any morsel of information?
She could stop the tutoring with Lise— Felicity instantly rebelled at the thought. She may have given up her heart to Daniel, but she wouldn’t give up her goals because of him.
The week with him, visiting the stores and showrooms, and his talks on how the business worked, had been a small taste of a dream. Now she was taking things a step further.
Just days ago, she’d lowered her pride—hah! Like she had a big honking supply of that left—to ask Cheryl’s help with her new job search. Retail sales in a store was her best option to get a foot into the industry, Felicity had decided, but places like that wanted a resume.
On the other hand, asking for help meant confessing about her dyslexia. Briefly she’d thought about asking Lise, but she didn’t want any more Mackenzie involvement in her life. So she’d practiced how to phrase her request, then braced herself for the pity, or shock, or reassessing look from Cheryl.
But Cheryl just paused in filing her nails, shrugged and said, “Okay.” No big deal. She’d been more concerned that they’d lose touch once Felicity left The Uptown.
She was still a little stunned by her friend’s reaction, or lack of one. But maybe that was it—Cheryl was a friend. The people from her past, who’d made cruel jokes at her expense, weren’t.
A lump formed in her throat. It was good to have real friends like Cheryl. Even Stuart had pulled through Saturday night with plenty of sweet, hot, milky tea and a shoulder to cry on. Then he’d tucked her into the pullout futon bed. Without trying to climb in with her.
And Lise was her friend too. That’s what made it doubly hard for Felicity, knowing she had to end the friendship if she had any hopes of holding on to her sanity. The constant reminder of Daniel—his eyes, his smile, his hair—in his mother, was too much for her to deal with.
She sniffled. Wiped at a tear. Then another and another. She had to pull herself together before Lise came back. She started using her sleeve, gulping back the waves of pain, but her chest felt cleaved wide open with the need for Daniel, his arms, his kisses. His love.
Oh God. She was losing her mind. She could actually smell him. The warm, citrusy scent teased at her and a chill raced down her spine.
“Baby, don’t cry. Please.” Calloused fingers joined hers, wiping at the wetness on her cheeks.
Felicity’s heart stopped beating, then raced to catch up. “Daniel?” Was it really him hunched down beside her chair, his gaze so sad, and his smile so tender? There were dark circles under his eyes, and he seemed pale as if he’d been sick.
“Yeah, it’s me.” He thumbed away another tear.
“W-what are you doing here?”
“I came for you.”
Not looking for you. Came for you.
“I miss you, Felicity,” he said softly.
She dragged his hand away from her face, but held on to it, just as she was holding on to the glimmer of hope that spurted to life in her.
“What about Deirdra? She showed me the ring.” Felicity’s self-control crumpled and her voice dropped to a rasping whisper, “Why that ring, Daniel? That was mine.”
She cringed in mortification. No, that wasn’t her ring. Then her eyes widened at Daniel’s string of vicious curses.
“Felicity, I swear on a stack of Bibles that I did not give Deirdra that ring.” His fingers tightened on hers. “I went into my office to get away from the party. I couldn’t stand the fact that there were all those people in my home when the one person, the only person, I wanted to be with, was leaving me.”
He stared into her eyes. His were burning with an emotion that made her dizzy, and she hardly dared to breathe.
“I had the stupid idea that that ring could bring me, I don’t know, good luck with you.” He laughed as splotches of color flagged his cheeks. “Like a talisman.”
“Deirdra saw me with the ring, and—” Daniel grabbed the nearest chair and sat, facing her. He took both her hands in his.
“And?” Felicity prodded.
“I told her how I felt about you. Then we had a talk we should have had years ago. I told her I didn’t love her.” He looked down at their clasped hands, twining her fingers around his. “She was hurt. So when she asked to be left alone, I didn’t think twice about leaving the ring with her.” Daniel looked up again. “It meant nothing to me at that point if I couldn’t give i
t to you.”
He pressed a dozen tiny kisses to the back of her hands. “I know I messed up, and you still have feelings for Stuart.”
“No, no, no.” She shook her head. “Stuart’s just a friend.”
“Then why did you go to him?”
“Because he is my friend. He makes a play for me like he scratches an itch.” She laughed softly. “He can’t help himself. That’s why we never lasted. He couldn’t stop helping himself to other women, too,” she ended on a wry note.
“He’s an ass. I would never do that to you. Never cheat. Never lie.” Daniel reached out and stroked the hair away from her face. “Can I have a second chance, Felicity?”
Her throat seized with emotion. Her tongue swollen with confessions of a love so big and so deep and so strong, she knew the words would come out pure gibberish. Overwhelmed, Felicity dropped her gaze, ready to say the only three words that were adequate, and froze. Sunlight shone bright on the pages of the book that still lay open on the table, and beyond it a cardboard placard, clearly printed with: Reserved for Learning Partnership, stood tented.
“Felicity?”
She reached for the book to close it. Then she thought of how secrets had almost ruined things for them before, and she pulled the book of fairytales towards her.
“Let me read you something,” she said huskily. At Daniel’s expression, she added, “It’s important.”
Felicity cleared her throat and started to read. Slowly at first, just by sight. But she began to stumble and then to backtrack. And the loud thudding of her heart almost drowned out her dwindling voice as she fell into the old habit of guessing words from the sentence’s context. Then she tried to use her finger as a guide, but her damn hand was trembling so damn bad, and her vision started blurring, and—
“Stop.” Daniel laid his hand over hers. His voice choked. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I-I couldn’t bear for anyone to know. People don’t understand dyslexia. When you get called ‘stupid’ and ‘retard’ enough times, you start believing it.”
She shrugged, still not meeting his eyes. “Dropping out of high-school seemed like a smart thing to do. But things just got worse. I couldn’t get a decent job, and ended up working at places like—”
“The Uptown.”
Felicity nodded, and finally looked at him when he forced her chin up. The lines of his face had softened.
“Don’t feel sorry for me.”
“I don’t. I think you’re one of the bravest women I know,” he smiled, “besides my mother.”
That made her giggle.
His smile slowly died. “About The Uptown….”
“I did what I had to do, Daniel. I can’t apologize for that. But I’ve been looking for another job in the decorating field.”
He let out a huge sigh. “I am so glad you said that. I don’t want you stripping.”
Felicity raised an eyebrow. “Oh really? I haven’t even said I’d get back with you, and already you’re trying to lay down the law.”
Daniel froze. “You don’t want to come back?”
She stared at him. There wasn’t an eyelash or laugh-line on him that she didn’t love. His passion, his stubbornness, his thoughtfulness, his smarts, his humor, she could be here all day listing it all. “I do.”
A huge grin split his face, then he wrapped his hand around her nape and pulled her to him, ravishing her mouth until somehow she was on his lap and ravishing him back.
“Excuse me!” A frigid voice doused the heat of their passion. “You can’t do that in here!”
Felicity broke away from Daniel and stared at the tight-faced librarian bemusedly. “Sorry.” Not really.
But it was kind of embarrassing. She slid back to her seat. Daniel slid the open book over his lap. The librarian’s lips disappeared into a thin white line of disapproval.
They started giggling as soon as she turned her back.
“Well, I’m glad to see you kiddies behaving yourselves.” Lise returned. Her smile was nothing if not gloating.
“You told him!” The pieces suddenly fell into place.
“I did not!” Lise looked offended. “You asked me not say anything.”
Felicity turned to Daniel.
“She didn’t say a word.”
“Then how did you know to find me here?”
“I followed her,” he said, without a hint of shame. “I remembered you two had some sort of book club.” He glanced at the fairytale and reached for her hand. “So this morning when she mentioned she was going to drop by the library today, I decided to tail her.”
“And a very poor job you did of it, too. I almost lost you twice.”
They both stared at Lise, shocked.
Her eyes sparkled with enjoyment. “Honestly, I was tempted to throw a trail of breadcrumbs out the window. I just couldn’t stand to see the two of you moping around. It was severely depressing.”
Lise bent down and kissed them both on the cheek in turn, then she wrapped them in her embrace. “Be happy, my darlings,” she whispered fiercely.
“We will,” Felicity said.
“I am,” she heard Daniel reply.
Lise straighten up. “Well, I expect you both over to dinner soon. We’ll make plans later, call me. Now I—”
“—really must run. I’ve got so much to do,” Daniel and Felicity said in unison and started laughing.
Lise wagged her finger at them, blew kisses in their direction and she was off.
They watched her go.
“Your mother is scary.”
“Absolutely.” He reached over and pulled her back onto his lap. “But enough about my mother. Let’s talk about us. And how much I missed you.” He kissed the tip of her nose. “And how much I need you,” he added hoarsely.
Felicity felt her heart tip. Just so. She traced his lips. Then tenderly sealed her touch with soft kisses.
“That’s it. I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you two to leave.” It was the boot-faced librarian.
They left, giggling like a couple of teenagers, but not saying much else. Each of them aware of how fragile this thing between them was. When they got into his truck, though, Felicity had to ask, “Where’re we going?”
“Home. The condo.” He reached over and twined his fingers in hers. “I want to make love to you.”
She felt awkward suddenly. “Are you sure?” Felicity turned her face away to look out the window. “You said some pretty ugly things before, Daniel.”
“And I’m sorry. For every stupid, hurtful thing I said.” His voice was rough and dark and hoarse. “I was crazy with jealousy. And pissed-off, and hurt that you were keeping secrets. Not that that excuses me, but I thought we were growing closer, then to find out…and in that way.” He shook his head.
She turned back to him and he saw the question in her eyes. “I was angry and talking out my ass. I know I hurt you and I’m more sorry than you’ll ever know for that. But that’s not how I think of you, Felicity. And I will never say anything like that to you again, ever. Promise.”
She remained silent and he swallowed. He was scared of losing her again, but they had to do this thing right.
“We have to let this go. We both have to get past this thing with your stripping, or we haven’t got a chance of making it.”
The path to her love lay in her trust. He would earn that trust and he’d give it back, unquestioned from now on.
Felicity nodded, her fingers tightening around his. That’s all he needed. Another chance.
They made the condo in record time and rode up in the elevator, only holding hands and avoiding eye contact. The tension between them was palpable.
Once they were in the foyer, Daniel let go of her. Felicity bit her lip, practically vibrating with need. By the intensity in his gaze she thought he’d jump on her right away, but he surprised her instead with gentleness. And his words were unexpected, also.
“You know, for the longest while, I wanted to be Stuart. I wanted
to be the guy you could never leave.” He trailed fingertips lightly along her neck, then fanned his hands out to bury them in the heavy curtain of her hair.
“You don’t want to be Stuart,” she whispered, reaching up to caress his face.
Delicate fingers traced his mouth and he parted his lips in a kiss, his tongue remembering the salty taste of her skin. The heady taste of her. He wanted to taste her again, make love, but on a new level, sharing totally this time—mind, body and soul.
“I only wish…” He stopped, the words jumbled on his tongue, each declaration fighting to be the first.
“You only wish what?” she prodded.
He made a frustrated sound and dug his hands further into her hair, cradling her head. “God help me. I love you, Felicity.”
“Oh.” She was robbed of speech; all she could do was act. Felicity poured every ounce of the wild emotions brimming inside her into a kiss, telling Daniel her own truth.
With a guttural sound he ended it. “I need you now.”
Her hand firmly clasped in his, Felicity practically had to skip to keep up with him as he strode towards the bedroom. But she would have skipped anyways with happiness.
When they got to his room, Daniel stopped, pulling her back into his arms, kissing her like there would be no more kisses after these, and he was saving up for forever.
She was on tippy-toes and still his hand on her ass pressed her higher and closer. Felicity wrapped one leg around his hip and he moved his hand to support her weight. Then he urged her other leg up, until her limbs were scissored around his waist and the thick hot length of his arousal pressed against her dampness. Moans mingled with sighs. Gyration met thrust, then Felicity was falling back onto the bed with the solid satisfying mass of Daniel covering her.
The soft landing also softened the edge of their passion. This was home, the two of them together in this bed. Slowly they undressed each other, kissing, tasting, rediscovering.
“Closer,” Daniel whispered as he moved against her warmth. His fingers delved into her, stroking in and out. Then spreading her wider, he softly fingered the hidden swollen nub of flesh. Felicity’s moans sent an answering shiver of satisfaction winding down his spine. This could be enough, bringing her pleasure, watching the mix of emotions race across her face.
