by Kat T. Masen
It was just before ten when Charlie and I woke up. Already showered, I throw on a pair of yoga pants and my favorite retro tank with a Guns ‘n Roses logo on it. My hair has grown, so I pull it up into a ponytail and slip into my sneakers. I figure today’s a new day, and I should start my workout regime. That is until I find some leftover Dunkin Donuts in the kitchen.
Maybe tomorrow.
The doorbell rings just as I’m about to grab a second donut. With Charlie in the shower, I am assuming Lex is ready to use his manners and apologize for his bitch-fit last night. I open the door to be met with Julian standing on the porch. Oh crap. My body has mentally thrown itself at him, smothering him until he can’t breathe, but in reality, I’m standing here not moving a single limb.
“Can I come inside, or would you like me to go make friends with the lady across the street?”
That nosy Mrs. Randle from across the street is peeking through her lace curtains. It isn’t like I have men here, but then again, between Lex, Eric, Tristan, and Rocky, perhaps her twisted mind will think I run a burlesque house.
I motion for him to come in. “Charlie is still here. Is that okay?”
He nods and smiles reassuringly. Maybe I’m more nervous than him.
I grab his arm and pull him toward the kitchen when Charlie’s footsteps bustle down the stairway. “Wow, Adriana, how good is that strawberry body wash. I should recommend it to a lady in my gym who has the stinkiest vag—” She halts at the bottom of the stairs, keeping her expression to no more than a faint smile.
“Was going upstairs to get you, but—”
She interrupts me, smiling warmly at both of us. “No. Hey, it’s okay. Hi, Julian.”
“Hi, yourself.” He grins back at her.
Oh, this is awkward.
“So, how you been?” Charlie asks politely.
“Great, and you?”
“Yeah, good.”
We all fall into a digestive silence until I open my mouth. “Okay, this is awkward. And I mean more awkward than the scene in America Pie where Jim is caught humping the pie.”
Julian and Charlie laugh in unison, breaking the tension in the room.
I realize the only person making this awkward is me. I wrap my arms around his waist and snuggle my head into his chest. He smells like aftershave—sweet, cool, and sensual. Dressed in a white polo and navy dress shorts, his tan looks nice and even. I missed him.
“Oh, shucks, you two.” Charlie beams. “No awkwardness from me, okay? And I reiterate… me.”
“Thank you, Charlie. It means a lot to us,” Julian says.
“I know you got my back. So, are you going straight home?” I ask.
She nods. “Yep. Hopefully, the beast has sobered up and not trashed our house.”
“Call me later, okay?” I let go of Julian to hug Charlie.
She squeezes me tightly and whispers in my ear. “I think this will work out.”
I smile at the sentiment, letting go of her. She steps forward and makes an effort to hug Julian. At first, he seems conflicted, but I see his body relax.
“It was nice seeing you again. Take good care of my girl, okay?” She pulls away and says goodbye, exiting through the back door.
Relief washes over me, and I immediately feel like a weight is lifted off my shoulders. Okay, maybe only one weight. My hands entwine with his as I lead him up the stairs to my bedroom. I said I was uncomfortable having him here, but my body needs him more than ever. He is quick to discourage me, but I hush him, closing the door behind me. Inside the room, my drapes are wide open with the sun filtering through. I tug on his shirt, pulling his body in flush with mine. His eyes are boring into me, filled with hunger and thirst, the same strong emotions which consume me. He tilts his head moving in, brushing his lips softly against mine. It travels directly to where it intended to go, the fire of passion ignites in just one kiss. My mouth moves back to his, nibbling his bottom lip with a gentle tug. His moans are trapped in our kisses, urging me to take a few steps backward until we’ve both fallen onto my bed. I pull away for a brief moment, staring directly into his eyes.
“Make love to me. Here. Please.”
And just when he opens his mouth to say something, my cell rings, the loud noise bouncing off the walls. I excuse myself, worried it could be Andy. I roll over until I’m within arms’ reach of the bedside table just in time to see the name Mary Jean flash on the screen. Just fucking great. If I don’t pick up the phone, she will call like a crazed stalker ten times in a row.
“Hi, Mary Jean.” I mouth to Julian “I will be quick.”
“Darl! How is my gran-baby? Can I talk to him?” she almost shouts.
“Andy’s great. He isn’t here with me. Slept at a friend’s house last night.”
“Well, why would he need to? You’re his mama…”
This isn’t the first time Mary Jean has put in her two cents worth, and judging by her raised tone, she may have slipped some bourbon into her morning coffee.
“Listen, I need to go. How about I give you a call tonight when he’s home?”
Seems like a good compromise, but typical Mary Jean has to ramble on. I listen for another two minutes before I quickly say goodbye, hanging up the call. I switch the cell to silent, not to be interrupted.
“We should probably talk,” Julian insists.
“Probably, but I’d prefer to have you naked on top of me whispering sweet nothings in my ear.”
With a wide-eyed grin, he rolls me back toward his body, pinning me underneath him. “Finally,” he whispers.
And finally, just like he wants, he makes love to me on my bed.
It’s exactly what I need, what we both need. I feel free, and my body is finally letting go. My mind wants to follow, but the sight of a raven sitting on my window ledge startles me. It’s odd, and I haven’t even seen one near my house. At least, not that type of bird. It doesn’t leave, continuing to stand on the ledge.
Why won’t it leave?
Then it dawns on me, remembering what my mom had once told me. The raven is known as a messenger bird, but what the hell does that mean? Was it coming here to warn me or guide me?
It doesn’t matter. It’s here to communicate with me, and there’s only one person trying to do that, and only one person I’m not able to hear.
Elijah.
We stay locked in the bedroom for two hours.
To say I’m sore would be an understatement. Every attempt to move a limb will have me laughing in hysterics, and even that task is painful. Between my legs are red raw, and I mean I can’t even wipe myself with toilet paper without wincing. Julian’s well aware of my physical state, but do you think that stops him? No. Apparently, my ass needs a workout, a very any-hole-is-a-goal situation.
“Why aren’t you sore? Do you have an invincible penis? Should we get it a cape and mask?”
His chest rises and falls as he twists a lock of my hair between his fingers. “Adriana, that last move almost broke me. But fuck, what a nice sight of your ass.”
“We could end up on Sex Injuries in the ER or whatever that show is called.”
“I wouldn’t be surprised if we do. You’re quite bendy and flexible, and my super-penis is not.”
Embarrassed, I blush at his comment. “I’m sorry.”
“Considering I almost blew when you did that thing with your leg over the side, it’s a talent. No need to be sorry.”
“You won’t be saying that when you’re on national TV.”
I try to move my body so I can kiss him, but I’ve lost the will to move and fall onto my back. Julian laughs at me and reminds me to get to the gym if I want to keep up.
Who would’ve thought two hours could do so much damage to one’s body? I remind him it’s almost time to pick Andy up from Hazel. He’s just as anxious to see him, and even suggests that we take Andy out afterward. It’s a great idea and makes me very happy to spend time with my two favorite people. The only thing bugging me is the sight of that raven. G
oogle. It holds the answers, but with Julian constantly by my side, it’s best that I research this in private.
After the big showdown at the party, no doubt Lex will avoid me at all costs, he’s stubborn and extremely hot-headed. According to Eric, he’s also blacklisted since he knew what was going on. The only person who isn’t is Charlie. No surprises there, the moron thinks only with his dick.
Our relationship coming out is a huge deal. One would think it means we have the freedom to see each whenever and wherever we please. Quite the opposite—we barely have time to see each other. Julian has endless meetings with his editor this week, being offered another book deal plus the New York Times wants to offer him a permanent column. Life for him has really taken off, and no one is as deserving as he is. It does, however, mean he has decisions to make with what direction he wants to take his career in.
When he mentioned the New York Times, my heart sunk thinking he will need to move back to Manhattan, but he’s quick to tell me they are happy for him to stay in LA and fly over once a month. It seems like the perfect opportunity, yet he’s unsure if he wants to go back to working for a newspaper having enjoyed his time writing his book.
I, on the other hand, have become so busy trying to launch a new line. After the red carpet, my designs made it to Vogue and caught the eye of a few major labels in Paris. All of which want to schedule meetings with me, and given the difference in time zones, I find myself up at all hours trying to fit in work whenever Andy sleeps or is at daycare.
Between the madness, Julian and I will text or call, but we just aren’t in sync.
And the sex… well, that’s on hiatus.
We’re both busy and just can’t get anywhere within a reasonable time. Physically, I miss him. It’s like going cold turkey. He fucks me into oblivion and then nada. Okay, not nada, I did manage to blow him quickly one day on my lunch break, and the only reason it didn’t end in a happy ending for me is because an important buyer arrived early. Talk about leaving me high and dry, or more appropriately, lower and wetter.
Everyone has found out through the grapevine about our relationship. My mom is quick to call, and over the phone we had a lengthy discussion. She admitted that it all makes sense and understands why I was reluctant to come out in the open. After speaking to my dad, they both agreed that they want to meet Julian and thought it was a good idea to have a family dinner. I told her Lex wouldn’t come, but she was quick to reassure me that he already agreed.
What the fuck? What game is he playing?
Friday night, seven on the dot, Julian is standing with me on the porch. Andy is shuffling between us, busily telling Julian about Gramps and Grammy. I take a deep breath, but my airway feels tight. It could also be this dress which no longer fits loosely. So, I’ve gained a few, it’s what happens when you’re in love. Wait, did you just say that out loud or in your brain? OMG, look at him… his face hasn’t changed. Phew, okay, close call.
“Are you nervous?”
“Adriana… I’m thirty-three, it’s not like I’m in high school. I’ve been through a lot worse.”
I turn the handle on the door and push it open. Andy beats me to it, yelling for my parents as we enter the house. Mom is first to come out, wearing her apron. The aroma of pot roast is lingering in the air, and my taste buds go into overdrive. She wipes her hands on her apron as my dad walks in behind her. With both of them present, I introduce Julian. Being a perfect gentleman, Julian hands a bottle of wine to my mom and politely kisses her on the cheek. She seems incredibly pleased, shooting me a wink when he turns to shake hands with my dad.
My mom ushers us to the living room, both of us taking a seat on the couch. It doesn’t last long as Andy sprints into the room, pleading with Julian to come see the playroom. Of course, Julian agrees and excuses himself to follow an overly excited Andy.
“He’s lovely, Adriana.” My mom beams.
I go to say something, but Julian walks back in the room with Andy. The anxiety creeps up again, and just when I think I can control it, Amelia darts into the room and finds Andy.
They are here.
What’s the worst that can go wrong here?
Lex probably won’t talk to us, sulking with his they-have-a-plot-to-ruin-my-life attitude. Distraction will be the key to surviving the night.
Amelia is engrossed in this new Batman figurine, so it’s best to ask her a question just to clear my mind. I regret it almost immediately—this girl can talk, and I mean nonstop ramble that starts off with Batman to her trip to the museum to what she ate for lunch. For once, Andy is listening intently. His eye is on the Batman which no doubt will result in a tug-o-war later.
Charlie’s voice filters through the hall, and she enters the room with a baby carrier minus baby. Greeting everyone, she says hello to Julian in a casual way. She too looks on edge, and the reason why walks into the room carrying baby Ava. It’s impossible to be mad as Ava lights up the room with her infectious giggle. She’s almost eight months and has started to crawl. Unlike Amelia, she is a placid baby, happy to sit still and watch others. The older she grows, the more it’s obvious how much she looks like Lex. Those emerald green eyes are the dead giveaway, and poor Charlie, none of her genes carried over.
Lex is looking smug, wearing his jeans and black hoodie. He greets my parents as usual but fails to make eye contact with Julian or me.
Andy runs up and wraps himself around Lex’s leg. “Uncle Lex. Why didn’t you take me to soccer?” Andy complains.
“Sorry, Andy. I was busy.”
Fucking jerkoff. It’s one thing to be pissed off at me, but how dare he lie straight to Andy’s face.
The guilt must have hit him like a ton of bricks, his expression changing from wry to just plain old guilty. Serves him fucking right. Andy walks off with a sad face, almost in tears as he jumps into Julian’s lap and sucks on his own thumb again for comfort. The second that Lex sees Andy do that, his face falls, and pure hatred is steaming off him. The tension is so thick you can’t even cut it with three chainsaws.
My mom, also sensing the glum atmosphere, suggests we head into the dining room to eat.
Despite the nerves, I’m famished. The food is spread out on the table and looks scrumptious. I take a seat beside Julian, Lex sitting directly opposite me. It’s either that or directly opposite Julian. The kids are on the little table beside us, even Batman’s got his own chair.
We eat in silence until my dad begins the conversation. “So, Julian, Adriana tells me you travel quite a bit as a journalist. Tell me, have you ever been to Tanzania?”
“Yes, sir, about six years ago. I was part of a documentary which filmed people affected by diseases and how their current healthcare system can’t cater to the number of patients who need to be treated.”
“Please, call me Andrew.” My dad wipes his mouth with his napkin. “Quite impressive. I’ll be setting up a medical center in late fall. Would love to speak to you in more depth about what I should be expecting.”
“Of course, Andrew, I still have footage and notes.”
I look up at Lex. He has barely eaten and is swirling his food around. The conversation is probably a sore point, considering he gave up practicing medicine to become a billionaire. That’s entirely his decision and causes headaches for my dad, especially since he bent over backward to get Lex a job at the hospital.
Charlie is quick to compliment my mom. “Emily, you’ve outdone yourself again. This pot roast is delicious.”
“Thank you, honey.”
Lex finally takes a bite. “It was Elijah’s favorite.”
Everyone is quiet.
Fucking asshole pulling out a comment like that.
“Adriana mentioned it was your favorite as well,” Julian points out, challenging Lex.
Lex practically bangs his fork against his plate.
Charlie mouths “calm down.”
Under the table, Julian squeezes my thigh, relaxing me a little. If Julian has no problem with this, then why
should I? The only moron at the table is the one sitting across from me, refusing to make eye contact again. God, he is behaving like a petulant child.
“So, Julian, where did you grow up?” my mom asks as she serves some green beans to my dad.
Julian places his knife down politely. “In South Carolina. Stayed there till college.”
“What college did you attend, son?”
Oh, my dad called him son. Lex’s face is furious, the grinding of his teeth can be heard a mile away.
“Studied at Harvard, then moved to New York to find work.”
And then he met Charlie.
Looking across the table, Charlie shifts uncomfortably until Lex purposely drapes his arm across her shoulder. So fucking juvenile.
My dad talks about Harvard, and it seems to interest Julian. There’s a lengthy discussion held about the curricular activities, and during this time, the kids leave and are watching a movie in the playroom. The conversation then steers to New York as my dad probes Julian about his time spent there and his work with the New York Times. I motion to my mom to halt the conversation, and with feeble attempts, he still carries on.
“New York is a great home base for journalism. What made you move to Los Angeles?”
Lex laughs and rudely interrupts them, “Yeah, what made you move to Los Angeles?”
Julian takes all the questions in stride, not flinching once. “I was done with New York, wanted a more relaxed lifestyle. I used to surf a lot, and it seemed like a good choice at the time.”
“Well, I’m glad you decided to come here.” I rest my hand on top of his.
“Did the two of you meet here in California?” my dad asks, slightly confused.
“Uh… no, Dad. The first time we met was in New York at a charity ball.”
Charlie has a blank face, refusing to a comment. Lex is lapping up the attention, his arm still around Charlie. He might as well pee on Charlie to claim her as his, that’s how territorial he is.
“I met Elijah a few times. He was a great guy.” Julian smiled.
Both my parents nod in unison, happily smiling at both of us.
“So why don’t you tell my parents the real reason you left New York?” Lex pushes him.
