by Steve Shadow
“Ok, Billy it is. Agents, we don’t have any time to waste. We need to get to work right now. I will need to be alone with Billy so we are going upstairs to the safe room.”
She smiled at me and I nearly swooned. Her teeth were a brilliant white and her beauty was totally disconcerting. I was beginning to feel like a star-struck teenager. She probably thought I was an idiot. She had good reason. I was probably stepping into a hole I would never climb out of and here I was swooning over some hot ATF doctor who probably could care less if I lived or died. I knew these feds only cared about career advancement and trod on anything or anyone in their way. But, Jesus, she was beautiful.
“Billie, we need to get started. We are up against the clock on this one. Come with me and let’s get acquainted. Agents, if I need you I will page you. I don’t need to remind you that it is very important that we are not disturbed for any reason.”
She motioned for me to follow her up the stairs. I walked behind her, mesmerized by the way she filled out her pants and the way her parts moved. I started laughing. She stopped and turned and looked at me.
“Sorry,” I said. “I was just laughing at myself. I was thinking of something and the word mesmerized came to me. Kind of funny, don’t you think? I mean in light of what is probably going to happen.” Now I was sounding strange even to myself. I guess I was more nervous than I thought. I had expected some middle-aged dowdy woman in glasses with a physician’s haughtiness. What I did not expect was this vision of beauty that lit up the house.
We got to the top of the stairs and approached a door I had not noticed last night. It looked to be made of steel. It had a coded lock which she punched some numbers into. A tiny door slid open and she placed her thumb on it. I heard some dials whir and then the door swung open.
“Print recognition,” she said. “This is a soundproof safe room. We will be alone and undisturbed here.”
I peeked over her shoulder. The room had a table, some chairs and a couch. It also had a Pullman kitchen. When we entered I also saw a small bathroom. It had no windows but there was another door.
“What’s that door lead to?” I asked. “Never mind that Billy, let’s get comfortable and get to know each other a bit.”
She said that with the sweetest smile and the gentlest tone of voice. As much as I was in awe of her beauty I was getting that old feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“Listen Doc, I find it hard to feel at ease when you usher me into a room with a lock that only you can open and I can’t get out of. I thought this was going to be like an interview, a session to see if I could remember anything from the other night. Now I’m some prisoner of war and I didn’t do anything except get stupid over some redhead who is now dead. Just what the fuck is going on?”
“Billy, please relax. We came to this room to be safe and secure. What passes between us is confidential. I’m sure you understand the need for security and privacy. If it would make you feel better we can do this in an institutional setting. I didn’t think you would want to be confined in a hospital; it is so sterile. I think we can work much better here.”
She pulled a chair out from the small table and patted the chair. “Come on, have a seat. How about I make some tea?”
As soon as she mentioned tea I felt a chill run through my body. It was probably 110 degrees outside but in this room I suddenly felt very cold.
“Sure, tea, that sounds good. Should I call you Doctor?”
“How about if you call me Roxanne, let’s keep it informal. Calling me Doctor makes it feel so clinical.”
She brewed some kind of herbal tea. We sat and sipped at it. I felt its warmth flow through me and it did help me relax. She pulled out some files from her briefcase and we began to discuss the same stuff I had gone over repeatedly with the cops and agents. While she read over my statements and asked me questions I sat and studied her face. Her high smooth forehead sat atop her slightly rounded face. Her deep hazel eyes were set perfectly on either side a small roman nose. Her lips had a light hint of reddish lipstick. They were full and perfectly formed. She had a strong jaw and a long neck. Her shoulders were broad and she appeared to have an athlete’s physique. I wondered if she was a swimmer or a dancer. I was lost in her features and did not hear her asking a question.
“Billy, you have to pay attention. I need to clarify a few points before we start. Stop staring at me. I am here as a psychiatrist, not your date.”
“Well, can’t you be both?” I said with a big grin on my face. I was so nervous that I could not believe the crap coming out of my mouth.
“Let’s stick to the matter at hand. I don’t think you realize the importance of this investigation. According to this file one life has already been lost and the potential for many more deaths is of grave concern to all of us.”
“No, I guess I don’t realize anything. No one has told me shit about anything. This can’t just be about the murder of some fashionista clubhopper. The ATF is not a homicide team. Just what the hell is going on?”
“I will share with you what I have.” She leaned over the table and pushed a pad of paper towards me. On it she wrote, “Everything we say is being monitored and recorded.”
She sat across from me and winked. Now I was really at a loss. What kind of mind-fuck was she running on me? I took the pad and wrote, “So?”
She shook her head. “All right here is what I know about this case. You have to remember that I am not an agent myself. I am contracted to the agency on a case by case basis. Sometimes I am given information but generally I am told only as much as I need to do my job. What I do know is what I have in these reports. An investigation into the activities of certain foreign nationals has been in progress for a number of months. Initially Beverly O’Hara had been spotted in the company of said people and she was approached as a possible informant. It seems that she had a prior arrest for drug possession and this charge was to be dismissed in exchange for her cooperation in this matter. On the night in question she was not being followed nor were the investigations subjects. You just happened to fall into things on the wrong night. When her body was found, well, then you became the only link. They believe that whoever killed her was trying to set you up for the murder. It is imperative that we locate and identify these people. That is all I know about the case. I am not on a full need to know basis so that is all I can tell you. I am only here to try and help you remember details that will help them to identify the parties at the house on the night in question. For this to be effective I will need your willingness to work with me. No one can be hypnotized against their will. You will be in a state of heightened suggestibility. You won’t be asleep unless I tell you to be. Even under hypnosis I cannot make you do anything you do not want to. Do you understand?”
“Yeah, thanks for the info. You must think I’m a real idiot. Talking to me like I’m a 12 year old is not making me feel any better about this. Are you even a real doctor or just some Mata Hari plant? I find it hard to believe that a beauty like you is doing this sort of stuff for the ATF. Before we go any further I want to see some ID.”
I knew it was a little late in the game to be asking for identification but I was in a panic and was grasping at straws. She remained very calm and retrieved her purse. She opened it and pulled out her card which identified her as a licensed psychiatrist complete with office address, phone and website. She then handed me her wallet which contained a driver’s license and a bunch of credit cards. Of course this proved nothing. I didn’t know what to think. I tapped the pad of paper again and looked at her questioningly. She shook her head again. Was this some kind of game? Was she trying to tell me something? Maybe this was all just a ploy to get us to bond; like a kind of “us versus them” deal. Christ, what a mess I was in.
She leaned over the table after retrieving her items and pointed her finger at me. “Cut the crap, Billy. I’m trying to help you. They need your help but I am the best thing for you. If I don’t get results then those two downstairs get a shot
at you. Believe me; you are much better off with me.”
I jumped up from my chair. “Fuck, I knew I was getting screwed. What the hell, now I’m off the radar and that’s it? I just vanish into the bowels of a black ops never-never land. Shit, I’m going to kill Ridley. I knew I should have run. Dealing with you bastards is like stepping into quicksand. I told them and I tell you; I remember only what I already said. I ain’t got anymore. Just what the hell did I walk into? What the fuck is going on. Tell me something; what am I being held for. You know I didn’t kill that girl.”
By now I was screaming at her. She sat there expressionless waiting for me to finish yelling. I kept hurling insults until I was getting hoarse and then ran out of steam and sat back down. I knew I was fucked, the minute I got into that black SUV. I thought of all those late night talks we used to have over beers at Eddie’s and St. Francis and Rosie’s. Back then it was just a bunch of abstract conspiracy shit and a lot of leftwing paranoid babble. Well, now it was for real. I was stuck in the jaws of the federal meat grinder and no matter how beautiful Roxanne was, she was still “the man” and she could set me up for a life of misery. Instead of wanting to fuck her, now I wanted to strangle her.
I could feel myself tense up. She read my body language and stood and came around behind me. She put her hands on my neck and began to massage my muscles.
“Billy, you have to calm down. Let me help you and we can get through this. I promise that if you cooperate with me then this will be over and they will have the information we need and you can get back to your life.”
The feeling of her cool, strong hands on my neck and shoulders had the strangest effect. My breathing slowed and I felt a calmness envelop me. She was speaking to me in a soft measured voice. She came back and sat across from me. Looking me in the eye she asked if I was now ready to begin. I let my will to resist dissipate and nodded my head. I followed her directions and let my mind drift. I could hear her soft voice but it seemed to be coming from another room. I felt a state of lethargy envelop me and soon I was not there any longer. I seemed to know that she was talking and I was answering but it was all through a soft gray wall of fog. I was there and not there. How long this lasted and what was said I do not remember. Suddenly I was awake but disoriented. I blinked my eyes and shook my head. She was smiling at me.
“That was very good, Billie. You have been very helpful. You gave me details that helped to identify at least three of the people the agents have been watching.”
I felt as if I had just awoken from a long sleep. I looked at my watch; hours had passed. “What did I say? Who are these people?”
“That is not important for our purposes. What is important is that you helped them and hopefully you can move on from this. I have nothing to do with the legal aspects of your case but I am sure that once the facts are made available to the local police any suspicion of you as a suspect will be dropped.”
“I hope so. Anyway, I’m glad I could be of help. I’m sorry about freaking out and yelling at you. This whole business is really scary and I’m a nervous wreck. I hope you understand.”
“No problem, Billy, I deal with this all the time. It’s a scary world out there. God, I’m starving. Let me visit the powder room and maybe we can get something to eat.”
She got up and went to the small bathroom and closed the door. While I wanted to believe her about my ordeal being over, I wasn’t so sure. Her purse was on the table and I spotted her cell phone inside. I glanced at the bathroom door and quickly fished the phone out of her purse and punched in Ridley’s number. Linda put me through.
“Ridley, listen up, I can’t talk long. They got me in a place outside Eloy. I got hypnotized by this foxy doctor and gave her what she wanted to know. She thinks I may be off the hook now but I’m not sure. If you don’t hear from me by tonight you better start raising hell.” I heard the toilet flush and closed the phone. I threw it back in her purse just as she opened the door.
She came out looking more beautiful than before. Her smile made me ashamed to even think of not trusting her. I stood up.
“Let’s head downstairs, Billy. I think it’s time to get something to eat.”
CHAPTER SIX
Once we got downstairs she conferred with the agents. While they put their heads together I sat on the couch wondering if this was the end of the nightmare and I could go home. I heard my stomach growling and hoped we could stop for a burger or something on the way home. I looked up when Breck called my name.
“OK, Billy, the Doc said you were very helpful. Johnson made some chili. After we eat we’ll take you to ATF headquarters downtown. The Doc’s report has to be printed out and we need to get your signature on it. After that we need you to look at some more photos and see if they register.”
I jumped up from the couch. “Wait a minute; I thought that the interview was it. How much more of this shit do I have to put up with? How can I look at pictures and identify someone I have no memory of?”
Roxanne came into the living room and put her hand on my shoulder. “Calm down, Billy. Sometimes after a session such as we just had memories float to the surface and you may know more than you realize. The descriptions you
50 gave me under hypnosis were very detailed and specific. You may be able to identify much more than you realize. But don’t worry about it now. Let’s eat.”
I just shook my head and felt even more lost and depressed. I was having a Kafka moment and started seeing myself as the star in a new version of The Trial. We sat down and Johnson dished out bowls of chili, corn bread and cole slaw. Despite my fears I was hungry and dove in. The food was delicious.
“Hey Johnson, you should quit the ATF and open a restaurant.” I said. “You are a great cook.”
Everyone concurred. “Yeah, it’s a hobby of mine.” said Johnson. “Breck keeps telling me I’ll make someone a good wife.”
Jesus, he actually made a joke. I grinned in spite of myself.
Roxanne looked up. “I never have time to cook, not that I want to. It’s a waste of time and effort to cook for one person.”
That got my interest. “So Doc, you’re not married? That’s good to know.”
Breck laughed. “Jesus, I think Billy here has a thing for the Doc. Hey Wilewski, are you forgetting where your womanizing got you the last time out?”
“Hey, screw you Breck. You’re a real dick. Let’s get out of here and do what ever else you need me to do so I can go home. Your act is getting old. Are we done here? Can I pack my stuff?”
“Not yet. If we get what we need downtown, then it is up to the chiefs if you’re finished. If not, then we may have to return and continue the questioning. I know it’s a pain in the ass but we have to make sure that we have all you’ve got and that you are no longer in any danger. Even if we don’t come back here you may still need protection.”
Johnson looked at Breck in a funny way. He started to say something but Breck hushed him up.
“Jesus Christ, I’m not a criminal.” I said. “You can’t keep me forever. I’m trying to help but this is ridiculous. What’s next for me, a trip to Guantanamo?”
I looked at Roxanne. “Can’t you tell them that I gave you all I can possibly remember? You said I was helpful and identified the people you are after. What the hell else can I do?”
“Sorry Billy, I have no say in these matters. Just do as the Agent’s say and I am sure everything will be fine.”
I sat slumped in my chair. What a fucking mess I was in. As I sat there my mind began spinning. Maybe I was being too compliant. Just what was Roxanne trying to tell me upstairs? I stared at the two agents and Roxanne. They seemed to be what they claimed but I could sense a tension between them. Ridley was convinced they were for real so why was I feeling as if something was wrong. If Roxanne felt something was off she certainly gave no indication. She was all buddy-buddy with the agents and it was obvious they knew each other. I wondered just who it was that I had identified while under hypnosis. Something was no
t adding up here and rather than just wishing it was all over, it might not be a bad idea to find out what it was I was involved in.
While I sat there trying to figure things out they began to clear the table and wash the dishes. Johnson put everything away while Breck made a call to what I assumed was ATF headquarters. Roxanne and I waited while Breck and Johnson secured the house. They told us to wait while they went upstairs and scanned the area around the house with binoculars. They came back downstairs and we were then led through the tunnel to the garage. We got into the back seat of the SUV and latched our seat belts. I glanced at Roxanne and she gave me a wan smile. The agents went back to the house for one more run-through.
“Why did you write what you did on the paper upstairs? What is going on? Who are the people I told you about? Why does the ATF want them?”
“We have to be careful. I can’t talk now but something is wrong with this case. I had to be sure that you were not a plant. I will try and get another session so we can be alone. Just say nothing unless it is to me. I know this is confusing but I’ll explain…”
She stopped talking when we heard the agents returning. They climbed into the SUV and opened the garage door. We pulled out, Breck pressed a button and the garage door closed behind us. Johnson drove slowly around to the front of the house and we began our trip over the potted unpaved road back to the highway. It was late afternoon and the sun was low in the sky but the heat was still intense. The reading on the dashboard said it was 111 degrees outside. Luckily the car had an excellent AC unit and we were kept reasonably cool.
I may have been cool on the outside but inside I was seething. This interrogation without end was not only pissing me off but getting me scared shitless. I was off the radar now and I had my doubts that even Ridley could help me. My only hope now was Roxanne but after her little speech I was even more confused.
As we approached a deserted crossroads the car began to jerk and stall. The steering wheel nearly came out of Johnson’s hands. He stomped on the brakes and we were all thrown forward against our belts. Breck pulled out his weapon and yelled for us to get down in the seats. Breck got out of the car and began looking under the chassis. He stood next to Johnson’s side of the car and was waving at something or someone in the distance. Johnson rolled down the window and was about to say something when we heard a loud crack just after seeing Breck’s head explode and splatter all over Johnson. The agent scrambled out of the front seat. He was screaming and swearing as he crawled over us to the back of the SUV. He lifted a latch and pulled out an AR-15.
