by Rachel Hanna
“You made me a sandwich?” Janine wasn’t exactly an expert in the kitchen. She could fold her body into a million yoga poses, and she was one of the kindest people he’d ever met. But food preparation? No.
“Fine. Julie made it for me, but I got the ingredients out of the fridge for her.”
William chuckled and kissed her nose. “It’s the thought that counts. Thank you for bringing this to me because I did forget to eat this morning. Don’t you have class soon?”
“I do. But, I couldn’t let this momentous day pass without telling you how incredibly proud I am of you, Will.” She leaned against the railing. “You took a leap of faith, and I know how hard that is to do. You’re going to be successful with this, but, more importantly, you’re going to be happy. And that’s all that counts. The rest will fall into place.”
He hugged her tightly. “I love you, Janine.”
“Even though I can’t cook, can barely boil an egg and I had to ask Julie where we kept the bread?”
He chuckled. “Especially because of those things.” He looked up and saw his charter group walking down the dock.
“Looks like you’re on!” Janine whispered before climbing out of the boat and walking toward the road. She turned around one last time to give him a thumbs up sign and blow him a kiss before disappearing.
“You the charter captain?” one of the men asked. William paused for a moment.
“Yes, sir, I am. Welcome aboard.”
Dawson sat there, his hands on the picnic table. “So, you're telling me the process for adopting one of these kids wouldn't really be that hard?”
Amy nodded. “Most of these kids don't really have any options. They've been in the foster care system for a long time, and their situations aren't likely to change anytime soon. As you can tell, most of them are older, and we see a lot of people wanting to adopt out of the system but they usually want babies or maybe toddlers.”
“What about…”
“Dylan?” Amy asked, smiling slightly.
“Yeah.”
“He's been in the system for several months now, as you know. We've tried to reach out to his birth mother, but she hasn't responded and she lost her rights a long time ago. Unfortunately, even Dylan's extended family has a lot of turmoil. Drugs, prison. He's had a very difficult start in his life.”
Dawson shook his head and felt his jaw clench. If there was anything that upset him, it was when children were mistreated. Having lost his own child, he couldn't imagine how anyone could mistreat theirs. Of course, he also understood addiction. He had friends with that very problem, and he certainly didn't want Dylan to be put in that situation.
“I’ll have to give it some thought. It would be life-changing.”
“For both of you,” she said with a wink. “Look, I am never interested in pushing anyone to adopt a child. But I've seen you with Dylan this last week, and there's been a change in him. He's smiling more. Much more interactive. Eating again.”
“Eating?”
“His foster parents were having a lot of trouble getting him to eat. I think he's just been really sad about losing his father. Even though his dad was a complete screwup, that was all Dylan ever knew. They were having to give him nutritional shakes to keep him from going into starvation.”
“Wow. I had no idea. I saw him eat three hotdogs yesterday.”
Amy laughed. “Because he's happy here. He likes you. He likes this place. He lived in a single wide trailer on the outskirts of town. This must be like a mansion for him.”
“Nothing wrong with living in a trailer.”
“Of course not. But there is something wrong with living in one in a drug infested neighborhood and having no heat or air. When we picked him up, he was wearing dirty clothes and had no running water either.”
“Oh my goodness. Please don't tell me anymore.” Dawson didn’t think his heart could take it. And the fact that there were thousands of children out there in the same situation made him feel helpless. He wanted to help them all, but it was impossible. The system was so broken that it was hard to imagine anyone could ever fix it.
“Am I interrupting?” Julie asked as she walked over to the picnic table. Dawson quickly looked at his watch.
“Hey. I didn't expect you until this evening.”
“Well, Meg got out of class early so I thought I'd come and see if I could lend a helping hand.”
“Hi. I’m Amy.” She reached up and shook Julie’s hand.
“Nice to meet you.”
“Amy is the director of the foster care system. We were just talking about some of the kids and their situations.”
“You do good work. I'm not sure I could know about all of these sad stories without it breaking my heart.”
Amy nodded. “It breaks my heart every day, but I feel like God called me to do this work so I continue on. The best part of my life is when I see one of these kids get adopted into a good home.”
“That must be very rewarding.”
“It certainly is. Well, I’d better go and see how the kids are doing on their craft project. Colleen and Tucker should be finishing up soon, and then we will go down to the beach for a little free time.”
“I’ll be over in a little bit,” Dawson said, waving as Amy walked away.
“I can't believe tomorrow is the last day. I'm sure you'll be excited to get a little downtime.”
Dawson nodded. “It's been pretty exhausting, for sure. But I've enjoyed every minute of it. I wouldn't trade this experience for anything, honestly.”
Julie looked like she wanted to say something. “Listen, can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Are you thinking about adopting one of these kids?”
He swallowed hard. “I… don't know.”
Her face softened and she reached over, putting her hand on top of his. “Dawson, you would make a fantastic father. You deserve to have that kind of unconditional love from a child in your life. If that's what you want to do, I support you, fully.”
He let out a sigh of relief. “Really? You'd be okay with that?”
“Of course. I mean, being a single dad is going to have its challenges.”
Single dad. She wasn't saying that she wanted to be Dylan's mother. She was saying that she would continue dating him even if he adopted Dylan.
In that moment a swirl of emotions welled up inside of Dawson. Was she planning on just dating him forever? Did he want to adopt a child and be a single dad for the rest of his life? No. He wanted Dylan to have everything, including a mother who loved him. A mother who would teach him how to treat women. A mother who would bake him cookies and smile as he gave her a homemade Mother's Day card.
But Julie was already a mother of two grown daughters. It wasn't fair to ask her to start all over and parent somebody else's child that she didn't even know.
Was he going to have to make a choice? He didn't know what to think, so he just kept a fake smile on his face.
“Yeah. I'm sure it will be hard. Listen, I really need to get over there and help corral these kids so we can take them down to the beach. Do you mind?”
“Oh,” she said, looking surprised. “I thought maybe I could help out?”
“I’m not really sure what to tell you to do. Maybe check with Colleen?”
There was a tension between them, and he knew that Julie didn't understand it. Maybe she would just think he was tired, and that was okay. He didn't want to have a big emotional conversation right now. He wanted to clear his mind and figure out what to do next, but he couldn't seem to do it. It seemed like he had nothing but questions in his head with no answers.
“Okay. I'll do that. See you later?”
He nodded as she stood up. “Sure.”
As he watched her walk away, he wondered how he was ever going to live without her if it came to that. Or should he make the choice to live without Dylan? Could he ever forgive himself now that he knew how much Dylan needed him? Right now, he wanted to walk far o
ut into the ocean until his mind cleared.
Julie stood at the table handing out snacks with Colleen before they were going down to the beach for some free time with the kids. So far, she’d met two sisters, ages ten and twelve, who had been in separate foster homes for eighteen months. Another little boy, who was just about to turn seven, had been in the system since he was five years old. The stories were breaking her heart. How had she not seen this before? Had she been so focused on her own bubble of a world that she didn’t think about kids without parents?
“You okay?” Colleen asked as she handed out the last bag of baby carrots. The kids walked over to sit at some temporary picnic tables they’d assembled in Dawson’s side yard.
“Yeah, I’m fine. These stories are just killing me.”
“I know. All week, I’ve thought about nothing else. I hope that I can become a foster parent one day.”
Julie smiled. “Really? That makes me proud of you, my beautiful daughter.”
“You know, Dawson and Dylan really have a bond.”
She nodded. “I know. I honestly think he’s considering adoption,” she whispered.
“Really? That would be amazing for both of them.”
“It would.” Julie wiped down the table and stacked the rest of the snacks into a cooler for next time.
“Mom?”
“What?”
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong. Why would something be wrong?” Julie said in a voice several octaves higher than her normal one.
“Do you not want Dawson to adopt Dylan?”
She sighed. “I would love that, Colleen. What kind of person wouldn’t?”
Colleen put her hands on Julie’s shoulders and turned her around. “Then what’s going on?”
“It’s silly.”
“Just spit it out,” Colleen said.
“It’s just that I feel like he’s moving on without me. I mean, he’ll become a single dad and be busier than ever, and then maybe we won’t be together anymore. How incredibly self-centered is that thought?”
Colleen took her hand and walked her beside the barn where they were out of sight and out of earshot. “Mom, you know that Dawson isn’t Dad, right?”
“Of course.”
“He would never just leave you like that. If he decides to adopt Dylan, you know it would be after he thought about it long and hard, and he’d want you to be a part of that.”
“I’m smart enough to know that Dawson wants the whole white picket fence life. Once he has a son to raise, he’s going to want a wife too.”
“Why can’t that wife be you?”
Julie shrugged her shoulders. “Well, he hasn’t asked, has he?”
Colleen’s eyes widened. “Come on now, Mom! You know he’s hinted and you’ve shot that idea down before. Why would he ask?”
“I wasn’t ready then. Your father… Nevermind. Let’s not rehash that.”
“Does Dawson know you’re ready now?”
“I don’t even know if I’m ready now.”
Colleen threw her hands up. “Stop overthinking everything! You love him, he loves you.”
“Didn’t you turn Tucker down?” Julie pointed out, her eyebrows raised.
“Not because I didn’t want to marry him. He asked me way too early in our relationship. But, one day, I will say yes if he asks again.”
“Sorry to interrupt, but we’re heading down to the beach and could really use a couple of extra hands,” Tucker said, poking his head around the side of the barn.
“We’ll be right there,” Colleen said. Tucker trotted away, gathering up a couple of stray kids as he ushered them toward the shoreline. “We’ll talk about this later, okay?”
Julie smiled. “Don’t worry about me, honey. I’ll be fine. You just enjoy the success of this wonderful camp and let me figure out my own relationship problems.”
“Fine, but consider one thing.”
“What?”
“You might just be your only relationship problem, Mom.”
As she watched Colleen walk away, she wondered if her daughter was right. Was she the one causing her own issues by living in the past and being afraid of the future?
Chapter Ten
Colleen took a long sip of her wine and then set it on the table. “The woman is exhausting.”
Dixie laughed. “You better draw those shades so she doesn't see us in here. Besides, I don't need any of my bookstore customers thinking I've turned this place into a bar.”
Janine stood up and closed the blinds. She pulled the rolling blind down over the door as well.
“The sun has gone down, so I doubt anybody is even walking around out there. You know why they call us a sleepy little town, don't you?” Janine asked as she sat back down. She poured herself a half a glass of wine, not wanting to miss her early morning class the next day.
“So why did you call this meeting exactly?” Dixie asked. Colleen sighed.
“Is it just me, or are Dawson and my mother two of the most infuriating people you've ever met?”
“What do you mean?” Janine asked.
“The two of them are madly in love with each other, but they have to make everything so difficult. I mean, come on. We know they're going to get married at some point, don't we?”
“That's not necessarily true,” Meg said from the corner. She had the baby on her hip and was trying to keep her occupied while the other women sat at the table.
“Do you have some kind of problem with Mom marrying Dawson?”
“Of course not. I like Dawson a lot. But, it's just kind of weird. I mean, she was married to Dad.”
“So what? Dad cheated on her, Meg. She doesn't owe anything to him.”
“I know that. That's not what I mean. It's just kind of creepy to see her with somebody else.”
“Well, you're gonna have to get over that,” Janine said, laughing.
“I know. I guess it just bothers me thinking of her going on a honeymoon or something,” Meg said, shuddering. Dixie laughed.
“Y’all are cracking me up!”
“So, what happened that made you call us all together?” Janine asked.
“These two need our help. I don't think they're ever going to get it together on their own. On the one hand, you've got Mom thinking that she does want to get married and then she doesn't want to get married and then she worries that Dawson will never ask her. She flip flops like a fish. On the other hand, you've got Dawson thinking about adopting a kid and thinking that Mom would never say yes if he asked her.”
“Wait, Dawson wants to adopt a kid?” Meg said.
“I’ll tell you about that later,” Colleen said, waving her hand at her sister. “The end result is that we have to figure out how to keep these two together. They are our glue.”
Janine cocked her head to the side. “Our glue?”
Dixie nodded. “I know exactly what she means. Julie coming to town and getting together with Dawson was what pulled all of us together. Why, if they were to break up, nothing would ever be the same.”
“Isn't that a little dramatic?” Janine asked.
“I think Colleen is right. These two are like baby birds who have hurt their wings. We need to pick them up, coddle them a little bit and then send them on their way. Hopefully they fly high.” Dixie lifted her arms into the air like she was setting birds free.
Janine stared at her. “And if they don’t?”
“Well, that's just not an option,” Dixie said, laughing.
“That camp is over tomorrow. I really think Dawson is going to try to adopt Dylan. And if he does, our mother would have to be okay with raising a child all over again.”
“Do you think she wants to do that?” Meg asked. “I mean, she's an empty nester. She's a grandmother, for goodness’ sake. Would she really want to start all over again?”
“To be fair, she wouldn't really be starting all over. Dylan is eight years old, so it's really just another ten years of her life,” Colleen said
, thinking out loud. “Still, it’s a big responsibility. I don't think she's even spent five minutes with Dylan yet.”
“Well, you run that camp. You’ve got one more day. Why don't you put her with Dylan tomorrow and see if they don't form a bond?” Dixie asked.
Colleen thought for a long moment. “Isn't that a little underhanded?”
“Do you see a problem with that?” Dixie said, shrugging her shoulders.
“Not a problem at all,” Colleen said, a slight grin on her face. “Maybe the only thing we really have to do is make sure that my mom falls in love with Dylan just like Dawson has. Hopefully, that will stoke the fires a little bit to get Dawson to actually propose. Otherwise, this whole thing is going to go on forever.”
“Fine. I’ll go along with this, but we have to accept whatever the outcome is. No pushing of either Dawson or Julie, okay?” Janine said, looking around the room. Everybody nodded.
“Agreed. Tomorrow, we start ‘Operation Fall In Love With Dylan’,” Colleen said with an evil laugh. This just had to work.
Julie stood on the end of the dock and stared at Colleen. Even though it was a beautiful day, the salt scented air was blowing her hair away from her face. “Are you serious? I don’t know the first thing about fishing.”
Dylan stood off to the side, his little arms crossed over his chest. “I thought I was fishing with Mr. Dawson today?”
Colleen smiled and looked back and forth at each of them. “Today, we’re trying something new. It’s good to get to know new people, Dylan. So, I thought maybe you could show Miss Julie what you learned from Dawson about fishing.”
“Where’s Dawson?” Julie asked under her breath, her teeth gritted.
“He’s helping set up some games for later. Tucker is working with him.”
Julie looked at Dylan, and he didn’t look amused. After all, what little boy wanted to hang out with a forty-something year old woman he’d only met briefly? Especially when she was dressed in white capri pants and a tank top and looked nothing like a fishing instructor.
