“Edith isn’t like that,” he murmured. “Not that Savannah was a bad person. She was just,” he mussed his hair, squeezed the back of his neck, “she was torn.”
“Savannah was who she was. A free spirit who happened to fall in love with two brothers.” Ash shrugged. “It was a hot fucking mess.”
“Yep, it sure was.”
“Tell me about Edith,” Ash said.
He couldn't help the smile that broke free. It didn't last though; it died a quick-ass death when he remembered that he and Edith were over. That they had never been in the first place. "Edith is amazing. Aside from being so damned beautiful, she’s kind and sweet.” He shook his head. “How do I risk hurting her?”
“I hate to break it to you.” Ash clasped him around the shoulder and gave a squeeze. He let go. “Relationships are full of risks. It’s how it works. It’s why being in one is so amazing. Each day is like a gift that you give to one another. I’m willing to bet you that Edith would rather have one hundred days, a thousand days, than none at all.”
“That’s not how it works at all. It’s all or nothing.” Gage believed in that wholeheartedly. It’s how he’d made himself stay far away from Savannah after she and his brother got together.
“You don’t have commitment issues. You don’t! You need to trust yourself more. Take it slow if you have to.” Ash narrowed his eyes. “You do realize that you just handed your female over to Jacob. You put her on a shiny fucking platter and handed her over. Not very smart, bro. Not smart at all.”
“I’m not on that list.” Anger rolled through him. “She deserves more than one night a month. I can’t do that to her.”
“Did you ever think to ask if she was okay with it?”
Irritation rushed through him. “Did you not hear the part about her being sweet?” He threw the words at Ash. "I decided for her because she'll agree to the long-distance thing and that's not fair."
“You do know that females like making their own decisions about things, right? That they’re quite capable of taking all the facts and—”
“Yes, fuck yes! I want her to be happy though. I’m doing this for her.”
"Spare me the bleeding-heart shit! You're afraid, and you're taking the cowardly route."
“You’re full of shit,” Gage snarled.
“Me?” Ash tapped his chest and grinned. “That’s rich.” He widened his eyes. “If you gave her the opportunity to choose, I have a feeling she’d choose to be with you. That you make her happy. I’m not sure why ‒ you’re a bit of an asshole ‒ and yet I know she’d choose to be with you, no matter what. I know a smitten female when I see one.”
Gage ran a hand through his hair. “What if I get cold feet? It’s what I do. It’s how I roll.”
“We already went over this. Your relationship with Edith is different to the one you had with Savannah. Edith is a completely different person. You made a mistake once, all I’m saying is don’t make the same one again.” Ash blew out a breath through his nose. “You kicked my ass when I couldn’t see what was right in front of me. That I was head over fucking heels in love with Alice. I’m returning the favor. I think you’re far gone. I’m saying it like it is.” His brother put up his hands.
Gage clenched his jaw. He didn’t say anything. His mind raced.
“Also, just so you know,” he pushed a breath out through his nose, “the list is about to be scrapped.”
“What?” Gage couldn’t quite believe what he was hearing.
“It’s about to be scrapped. The whole list concept is ridiculous. It’s stupid. I was against the thing from the start. It’s not working. It’s not how love goes. You can’t tell people when they can and can’t fall in love. It sometimes just happens, and usually when you least expect it.” Ash tapped him on the back. “It just happens, whether you want it to or not. You’ve been bit, bro. I suggest you do something about it.”
“Before she heads off into the sunset with Jacob.” He clenched his jaw.
“Edith doesn’t want Jacob, she wants you. Only has eyes for you.”
"You think so?" He hated that spark of doubt. He'd once been confident almost to the point of arrogance. Savannah had not only knocked him down a few rungs; she'd knocked him flat on his ass. It was clear that he still had to pick himself up a whole lot more.
“I know so. You need to hurry and do something about it quick, because every second you wait, you’ll have to grovel that much longer. She’ll be upset and then she’s going to get mad.”
Gage couldn’t picture Edith mad. He hated to picture her upset. It pissed him off, especially since he was the one to have hurt her.
They began to walk in the direction of Ana’s house. Her heart was beating so hard she was sure her ribs would bruise. No, that’s where she had it wrong, her ribs would be just fine. Her heart on the other hand …
So much for that. She said she would try, and she’d tried. Fat lot of good that had done because she’d failed. But at least she could say that she had tried. Gage, however …
She forced the anger down. He’d never promised more. Although, that wasn’t entirely true. He may not have verbally promised her more, but he had promised her more in other ways. Ways that counted more than words. It was like Cadon had said. He’d promised her more in the way he had touched her, the way he had looked at her. Even that stupid nickname had been a promise of sorts. Curls. The way he had said it had warmed her from the inside out. Had he not noticed how she lit up every time he said it? How she had lit up every time she looked at him?
Why had she let herself fall for him? It had all happened so fast. How was that even possible? She was an idiot. Bottom line!
Jacob touched the side of her arm. “Are you okay?” He sounded concerned.
She glanced his way. “Yeah, why?”
He smiled. There wasn’t nearly as much happiness in the smile as there had been earlier. If anything, there was hesitancy and uncertainty written there. It made her feel worse.
He stopped walking. “Because you’re grinding your teeth.”
“Oh.” She smiled. It wasn’t fair. Jacob was a good guy and she was using him to get back at Gage. “We need to talk.” She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. “I’m sorry, I—”
“You’re not into me,” he blurted. “I kind of figured.”
“It’s not that there’s anything wrong with you. You’re such a good guy. I find myself wishing I …”
Jacob grasped her arms and leaned in a little, looking her in the eyes. “I know you’re in love with Gage.”
Oh shit! She felt her eyes fill with tears. “Is it that obvious?”
Jacob nodded. “If you have half a brain then, yes, you’d notice.”
She breathed in through her nose trying hard to hold back those asshole tears. “I kind of wish I wasn’t but …” She shrugged.
“Maybe he doesn’t know. Guys can be stupid like that. Maybe …”
She shook her head. “I think he knows. I don’t understand why he’s pushing me away. Maybe it’s one-sided. Maybe I imagined his feelings for me.”
Jacob made a strange noise and pinched the bridge of his nose. “I want to lie right now because I want you for myself, Edith. I want to be the one to swoop in and heal your broken heart. Thing is though, I really do think Gage has feelings for you.”
“Why is he pushing me away then? I don’t understand.”
“You’ll have to ask him.”
The thought terrified her. She’d put herself out on a limb and had been shot down. Edith had gotten the message loud and clear. “No. If Gage decides to take his head out of his ass then … maybe, but otherwise.” She shook her head. “I’m going to say goodbye to Ana and then I’m heading home. Will you take me to her, please?”
Jacob smiled at her. It was so warm, so sweet. “I hope things work out, but if you ever decide that you’re over that asshole, and you’d like to give a wolf a chance, you’ll look me up?”
It was so sweet. Exactly what she had
been looking for from Gage. It ripped her heart open all over again because it reminded her of all she was losing. Make that, of everything Gage had chosen to throw away. “Shit,” she mumbled as the tears began to fall. “I’m sorry,” she managed to push out through the slew of hot tears.
Jacob pulled her into his arms and held her tight. “I can also be a really good friend,” he finally said when her tears began to subside. “No strings attached. I swear.”
Edith choked out a teary laugh. “That’s good to know.” She pulled away and wiped her face. “Thank you.”
Jacob cupped her cheeks. “You need to know that you are amazing. One in a million. You deserve to be loved and cherished. You deserve the best.” He let her go, brushing some hair off her face.
“I appreciate that.”
He rolled his eyes. “I mean it. Wholeheartedly. I find myself wishing I had ignored all the rules and …”
“Don’t even say it.” She shook her head. “Things happen and don’t for a reason. You’ll find the right person, Jacob. You know that, don’t you?”
He shrugged. “We’ll see.” Jacob pushed his hands into his jeans pockets. “I’m not really looking.”
She laughed. “Trust me, that’s the best time, although, it doesn’t always go the way you planned.” They picked up the walk again. “Good thing I happen to know that Ana has double chocolate ice-cream. A whole tub.”
“What does ice-cream have to do with anything?” He made a face.
“Ice-cream somehow has the ability to make you feel better when you eat it.” She smiled.
“It does?” Jacob looked skeptical.
“Yep, but it has to be straight out of the tub and shared with friends. You should join us and have a try.”
Jacob frowned. “I’ll have to take your word for it, but I’m game.” He still looked skeptical.
Edith couldn't blame him. Most times, ice-cream really worked. It could magically heal the soul; only, she got the feeling that this time would be different. This time, she would need a lot more than her favorite ice cream to heal her soul.
19
Was his brother right?
Had he known that Savannah had the hots for Ash when he dumped her? Had he pushed her away for those reasons and not because he couldn’t commit? Did his commitment issues stem from what happened in the past? Quite possible. Likely. Or ridiculous?
It didn’t matter. All that stuff Ash had said about risk made sense. He needed to put it all out there and then let Edith decide.
Gage rounded the corner. He could see the two of them up ahead. Jacob and Edith. Jacob was hugging Edith. Held her close, one hand rubbing up and down her back, the other threaded in her hair.
He bit back a growl. Green was not a good color on him. It was his own damned fault and it didn’t mean anything.
He kept walking, neither of them noticed him. Then again, he was still a good distance away. Edith wiped a hand across her face as she pulled away. Had she been crying?
Probably.
He was a bastard.
Such a fuck up!
When Jacob cupped her cheeks, he came to an abrupt halt. Gage’s heart beat so hard, he was sure it might snap a rib. He wanted to charge them head on and take Jacob out. Friends didn’t touch friends in that way. Fuck that! He was close enough to hear what the asshole-pup was saying. “You need to know that you are amazing. One in a million.” The male paused. “You deserve to be loved and cherished.”
It was true.
So true it hurt.
"I appreciate that." Her voice was a soft murmur. Edith didn't pull away. Just stared into his eyes. She said something else that he didn't register.
Gage had seen enough. “I mean it wholeheartedly,” he heard Jacob say as Gage turned and high-tailed it the fuck out of there. He’d been there, done that and had the bloody t-shirt and war wounds to prove it. Not again!
If Edith wanted Jacob, she could have him. He wasn’t going to be part of it. Fuck that!
One week later …
There was something that could be said about weariness. Absolute and utter bone shattering tiredness. It crept up on you, day by day. It settled in your limbs, weighing you down. Grabbing at you, every part of you. Holding on like it was never going to let go.
That’s how he’d woken up this morning. So tired he wanted to pull the covers over his head and never get out of bed. It was a good thing he had a play date with a certain young cub, and so he’d forced himself to get up, to get dressed and to turn up with a smile on his face, whether he felt like it or not.
“Ready?” Gage asked.
Ethan nodded, his eyes bright and wide. Gage pulled back his arm and threw the ball. Ethan caught it, dead-center in his mitt. “This is getting too easy for you,” Gage yelled at his nephew.
Ethan threw it back, his throw wasn’t as strong, so Gage had to run forward to catch it.
“Let’s make this a little more difficult. Are you ready?”
“Yes!” Ethan yelled, punching his mitt a few times.
“Good.” Gage loosed the ball, aiming just to the right of where Ethan was standing.
The little tyke caught it like it was nothing and threw out a giggle. One he felt in the gut. He loved this child with all of his heart. Gage had found himself wishing that the boy was his on more than one occasion.
Ethan threw the ball back. “Again, Uncle Gage. Again, again!” He jumped up and down.
“Okay.” Gage threw slightly wide a second time, to the left this time.
Ethan caught the ball with one hand, laughing all the while. The little guy was growing up.
“No.” Gage feigned shock. “When did you get so good at this?”
“I’ve been prac … prac … pra-ciss-ing.”
Gage bit back a grin. “You’ve been practicing, huh?”
Ethan nodded in an exaggerated way, as only a four-year-old could. “With daddy.”
“Well, I can tell.” Gage nodded once.
Ethan beamed.
“How about we take a little break and have a snack?” He mussed Ethan’s hair and his nephew giggled.
“Yes, please.” He clapped his hands.
They went and sat on the grass. “Let’s see what fun stuff your mom packed for us.” Gage opened a backpack and pulled out a couple of juice packs, handing one to Ethan. Then he pulled out some sandwiches wrapped in grease-proof paper. “Ham and cheese?” He raised his brow. “One with mustard and one without. I’m guessing you’re the mustard fan.” He tickled Ethan, who squeezed his juice box, spraying some of the contents all over Gage’s shirt. “Hey!” Gage pretended to be angry.
Ethan laughed and laughed. It came from somewhere deep in his belly. Gage couldn’t help but join in.
“I don’t eat mustard," Ethan announced when he finally calmed down enough to talk.
“You don’t? Oh well then, this one’s for you.” He handed the sandwich without the mustard to Ethan.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the food. Then Ethan turned and looked at him, a serious expression on his face. “Why are you so sad, Uncle Gage?”
“Who, me?” Gage shook his head, he even smiled. “I’m not sad.” He didn’t like the worried look in Ethan’s eyes. The kid was too young to feel those kinds of emotions. Especially where he was concerned.
“Yeah, you are.” Ethan looked at him some more, this time he really looked at him. “Even though you’re laughing and smiling, you’re still very sad inside. I can tell.”
From the mouths of babes. “I’m just working through some things. It’s not a big deal.”
“I don’t like it when you’re sad.” Ethan shook his little head, scrunching up his nose.
“I’m going to be fine.” He mussed Ethan’s hair again, but the little boy didn’t react this time, his whole expression still serious. “Sometimes people get sad.” Gage shrugged. “They can’t help it. I guess I am a bit sad right now, but I’ll get better.”
“Will you take medicine? Hum
ans take medicine when they are sick. Mommy told me all about it. She’s a human,” he added, just in case Gage wasn’t aware. It was so damned cute.
Gage chuckled. “Medicine doesn’t work for being sad. You see, it’s my heart that’s not feeling so well.”
“Your heart?” Ethan’s eyes were wide. Then he nodded as if he fully understood. “What about a Band-Aid? If I hurt myself, Mommy puts a Band-Aid on and kisses me better. You should put one on your heart.” He rubbed his chin, looking like a four-year-old professor. “I also think you need someone to kiss you better, Uncle Gage.” Ethan looked up at him with such innocence.
“It’s not as simple as that, buddy.” If only. He’d fucked up so badly.
“Yes, it is.” Ethan nodded, so sincere it was scary, but only because the little guy was right. “One kiss and you’ll be all better.”
Gage didn’t doubt it. “Maybe you’re right, buddy.” He hugged the little boy. "You're a clever sausage; you know that?"
“I’m not a sausage.”
Gage laughed. For the first time in days, it felt real. He felt lighter.
20
Edith was selling this house today. She could feel it. Her luck was about to change. Although this new potential client had insisted on texting her instead of having an actual conversation, he seemed really keen. Wanted to buy the house for his girlfriend. He even said that he loved the charm of the place.
Lucky girl.
Despite this house being amazing, with views to match, the show day had been a disaster. She’d been there, handing out flyers, only her mind had been somewhere else. Her heart was still back in that shifter village with a guy who didn’t deserve it.
If only she could just shut her feelings for Gage off. If only. She would and in a heartbeat. Gage didn’t deserve her. Enough! She’d wasted enough energy on him already. Back to the job at hand. This house and her life, dammit!
Shifter Night Box Set: Complete Set (Book 1 - 3) Page 51
