by Emma Prince
And would soon enough tear them apart once more. He prayed that Caroline would forgive him for postponing their journey to Leannan Falls, but whether they left tomorrow or in a sennight or in a year, she still wished to leave.
Still, even if they were fated to remain separated by the centuries, Callum could not go back to the life he’d had before. He could not marry for duty. Not when he’d experienced so much more with Caroline. But would that mean he’d destroy his clan’s chance for peace, all in the name of love?
Suddenly, his shoulders felt weighted with a lifetime of burdens. He pinched the bridge of his nose, letting a long breath go.
“It seems we are at an impasse for the time being, Laird MacConnell,” he murmured. “Mayhap ye and yer daughter ought to rest after yer journey, and we can resume this discussion when we are all refreshed.”
Laird MacConnell pushed back from the table. “We can rest and break bread and drink ale and talk all ye like, MacMoran. But it willnae change my mind. The only question that remains is when will my patience run out?”
Chapter Eighteen
Caroline rolled over for what felt like the hundredth time that night. The keep was quiet. The shutter was closed against the silvery light of the moon. The embers burned low in the brazier, providing cozy warmth.
Nothing was amiss.
Except everything was amiss.
She stared at the canopy over her bed, replaying every painful moment of the day.
It had been torture to sit in the great hall and listen to all that talk of Callum marrying Aileas. It was just another reminder that Caroline didn’t belong here, that her life was incompatible with Callum’s—whereas Callum and Aileas were perfectly matched.
Caroline’s only consolation was that Callum had seemed to be trying to find a way out of it. Still, that didn’t take away the sting of being blindsided by the knowledge that he was going to marry another.
Even though the engagement wasn’t official, he should have told her, she thought heatedly. She never would have kissed him or let herself fantasize about what it could be like between them if she’d known.
Guilt chewed the edge off her anger at that thought. Hadn’t she been the one to declare that there could be no future for them? To insist that she was leaving as soon as possible?
Her own words from a week past, so cavalierly spoken, came back to her. I’m not asking for anything from you. She winced at that. I only want to see what this could be—until I find a way home, that is.
She’d imagined that she could indulge her lust, her curiosity, with no strings attached. The problem was, there were strings attached now—and one string in particular that seemed to bind her heart to his.
And judging from the way he’d attempted that morning to calm Laird MacConnell and find an alternative that didn’t involve marrying Aileas, maybe he felt the same. But even if he didn’t, who was she to be mad at him? She’d made it abundantly clear that she wanted to get back to her own time and find her sisters.
It fanned her anger once more to think of how he’d broken his promise to take her to Leannan Falls. Sure, he’d said he would take her in time, and maybe he would, but it made her want to scream in helpless frustration to be forced to wait when she might only be a week’s journey from reuniting with her sisters.
Luckily, Laird MacConnell had declined a lavish meal that evening, declaring instead that he and his daughter would rest in their chambers until tomorrow. That had meant Caroline had been spared the misery of having to sit in the great hall and listen to more back-and-forth about Callum marrying Aileas. But it had also meant that she hadn’t seen or spoken to Callum since that morning.
It was for the best, she told herself as she lay in a tangle of blankets, fighting back the tears that had threatened all day. What else did they have to say to each other? Nothing had changed, except for a brief delay in their departure for the falls. She was still leaving for her own world. And he was staying here in his.
The thought should have comforted her, but it only made her stomach swirl and her chest squeeze painfully. With a frustrated breath, she threw the covers back and rose. Though it was probably well past midnight, she longed for the peace and calm of the garden.
She dressed hurriedly, slinging a cloak around her shoulders to keep the nighttime chill at bay. When she slipped out of her chamber, she listened for a long moment, but the keep was quiet and still.
She padded down the stairs, her slippers silent. But when she reached the landing below hers, she froze.
Callum’s door stood solidly closed before her.
She thought for a long moment about knocking softly, turning the knob, and gliding inside. His clean, intoxicating scent would surround her as she tucked herself into his warm bed. She’d find him there, hard and hot and so hungry for her that he would tear through her clothes and drive himself between her spread thighs.
No. She drew back, exhaling raggedly. What would going to him now change? Nothing. It would only break her heart more, knowing what she couldn’t have.
Forcing her feet to move, she continued down the stairs until she reached the great hall. Embers in each of the giant hearths cast a faint orange glow over the hall, just enough to make out the sleeping forms of the men covering the ground.
The hall was more crowded than usual, what with Laird MacConnell’s men joining the MacMorans to sleep on pallets or wrapped in their plaids. Despite the tighter than normal quarters, they all slept soundly. Several snores drifted through the otherwise quiet space.
Caroline picked her way between the sleeping warriors, careful not to step on them or even brush them with her skirts lest she disturb them. When she reached the keep’s doors, she cracked one open and squeezed through, closing it silently behind her.
Drawing her cloak tighter against the cool night, she hurried toward the garden. Only when she’d slipped through the gate did the knots in her stomach begin to loosen.
A brief, soft rain had fallen earlier in the evening, but a gentle breeze had chased away the clouds, leaving the nearly full moon and stars bare in the dark, clear sky. Caroline let their silvered light wash over her. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen so many stars.
She drew in a deep breath of sweet, fresh air. Everything smelled damp and alive and growing. In the glow of the moonlight, the garden looked wilder, less orderly. Lush green life tumbled out of the raised beds and climbed the keep’s side, squeezing against the stones walling the garden in.
It should have made Caroline feel better. Should have given her strength and peace, as being in nature normally did. Instead, all the abundant, verdant growth around her only stood in contrast to the withering heart inside her chest.
Her back bumped into the garden wall, and she slid down until she was crouched on the rich, dark soil. At last, the tears that she’d been fighting all day broke free.
She wept for her sisters, for the part of her that was missing without her family.
She wept for Callum, for the aching, unexpected love that had blossomed when she’d least wanted it, and for the future he would have—without her.
And she wept for herself, torn apart by two different times, two different lives, two different loves.
“Mistress Caroline.”
Caroline sucked in a breath and jerked to her feet, dashing her palms over her tear-streaked cheeks.
“Eagan,” she breathed, her gaze landing on the seneschal. He stood in the garden’s entrance, half of his features lit by the moon and the other half cast in shadow. “What are you doing here?”
“I noticed ye leaving the keep.”
So much for slipping out undetected. “And you followed me?”
“I…I want to help ye.”
Disbelief made her brows lower. It was obvious that Eagan had never liked her much. What help could he possibly want to give her now?
“What do you mean?” she asked warily.
Eagan picked his words for a moment. “It didnae seem…fair tha
t the Laird promised to take ye to the Lowlands, only to force ye to remain here while he sorts through matters with Laird MacConnell.”
Caroline let out a breath. “Apparently I’ll be adhering to his schedule for the time being.”
“I ken ye want to return home—wherever that is,” Eagan went on. “And I think ye should be allowed to.”
He reached into the folds of his cloak and pulled out a coiled length of rope. Caroline stared at it, confused.
“Ye could leave on yer own. Now,” Eagan murmured, extending the rope toward her.
“What?”
“Havenae ye noticed the way the trees at the back of the garden brush against the outer curtain wall?” he asked. “Fasten the rope to a branch, and the other end around yer waist. Climb the tree to the top of the wall, then lower yerself down the other side by the rope. Ye’d be free.”
“But…” Caroline’s mind spun with a dozen questions. “But I wouldn’t have a horse, and I don’t even know how to get to—”
“Go to the village on the other side of the castle. Ye’ll be able to buy a horse there.”
“With what? I don’t have any money.”
He reached beneath his cloak once more and withdrew a leather satchel much like the one she’d packed that morning in preparation to leave.
“There is coin in here, and food—all ye’ll need to get home.”
She stared at the rope and the satchel. “Why are you doing this? I know you don’t like me, so why are you trying to help me?”
Eagan lowered the rope and bag, meeting her gaze. His blue-gray eyes looked paler where the moonlight shot through them. “It isnae a matter of whether I like ye or no’. I am trying to protect my clan—and the Laird. Ye are a distraction to him, a diversion from his responsibility.”
He waved toward the keep, and she thought of Laird MacConnell and Aileas sleeping inside. And of Callum and his need to secure peace for his people. Tears burned in her eyes.
“I know,” she said, her voice tight and low.
“I dinnae ken where ye are from, nor do I care, but ye dinnae belong here. Ye must ken that, too—that is why ye’ve been trying to leave. Let me help ye.”
That was it—he wanted to get rid of her. He wanted to clear the path for Callum to refocus on his duty and marry Aileas. It just so happened that his goal of being rid of Caroline overlapped with hers of getting to Leannan Falls.
It was an uncomfortable alliance, but they could both get what they wanted. And Eagan was right. Caroline didn’t belong here—in this century or in Callum’s life.
Caroline swallowed hard, straightening her spine. She’d done enough dwelling and crying and overthinking. It was time she took action.
Reaching out, she grabbed the rope and satchel from Eagan’s hands.
“Ye are making the right decision,” he breathed, giving her a nod. “If ye do as I said and move quickly, the guards willnae notice ye, for they dinnae watch this section of the wall as closely. I must return to the keep. Safe travels.”
He turned to slip out of the garden, but she called out softly.
“Wait. Thank you, Eagan. And tell Callum…” She fought back the rising swell of emotion in her throat. “Tell him good luck with everything—the alliance and his marriage and…”
Eagan saved her from embarrassing herself with more tears by giving her another curt nod. And then he was gone.
Dragging in a fortifying breath, Caroline slung the satchel across her body, then tied one end of the rope around her waist, as Eagan had suggested.
Fleetingly, she considered digging through the bag to make sure she truly did have enough supplies to make it to the Lowlands, but then she discarded the idea. Even if she was short an extra pair of slippers or a loaf of bread, what would she do, go back into the castle and root around for the things she needed?
No, there was nothing left for her in there. She would just have to make do with whatever Eagan had packed.
She hurried to the dark row of fruit trees at the back of the garden, sizing them up for the thickest branches and the closest reach to the top of the wall. None was particularly sturdy looking, but she selected one of the pear trees and quickly tied the other end of the rope around its trunk.
Carefully picking her footing, she began climbing. Luckily, she’d had plenty of practice over the years—being an outdoorsy tree-hugging type really did have its advantages here in the medieval era.
Though Eagan had told her to hurry, she cautiously tested each branch before putting weight on it. The last thing she needed was to fall and break her neck mere feet away from freedom.
She looked up at the wall through the moonlit leaves. It still seemed so far away. She had to keep going. Drawing a breath, she reached up for another branch.
Suddenly, a pair of hard hands closed around her waist.
“What the hell are ye doing?”
Chapter Nineteen
A scream caught in Caroline’s throat, but it never escaped as she was pulled downward.
Callum plucked her from the tree as if she were just another ripe pear dangling from its branches.
“Let me go!” she gasped, struggling in his hold.
He lowered her to her feet, but his hands remained tight around her waist. With one step, he backed her into the deep shadows beneath the tree. Her shoulder blades bumped against the castle’s stone wall. Callum loomed over her, a dark figure outlined in silver moonlight.
“What the bloody hell are ye thinking?” he snapped. He grasped the rope tied around her waist and yanked it away. “Are ye mad, climbing like that in the dead of night? Ye could have killed yerself.”
“I would’ve been fine.”
His eyes, which seemed to glow gold in the dimness, locked on the satchel hanging across her body. “Ye were trying to leave,” he said slowly.
She lifted her chin. “Yes.”
“What the hell, Caroline?” he growled. “Ye promised ye wouldnae attempt to escape again.”
“And you promised to take me to Leannan Falls when I proved to you that I’m from the future!”
“And I will. But I cannae just set Laird MacConnell aside and ride out with you. If I leave now, the alliance—everything I’ve worked for as Laird—may fall apart.”
“How long before you’ll let me go?” she demanded.
He breathed a string of curses. “I dinnae ken.”
“So what do you expect me to do?” she shot back. “Just sit around twiddling my thumbs until you marry Aileas?”
“Nay.” His voice was low and grating. “Caroline, I willnae—”
She couldn’t take any more of this. “I can’t stay here! Don’t you get it? I can’t watch you making plans to marry someone else. It’s killing me inside. So let me go. To hell with the MacBeans and your responsibility to protect me. Let me go to the falls by myself. My sisters need me, and there’s nothing here for me anymore. I just can’t…I can’t…”
Her breaths were coming fast and shallow. She sucked in air in great gulps, as if she’d been trapped underwater and had just broken the surface. Except instead of relief, she felt as though she was being squeezed from every side.
“Let me go,” she panted again. “For both our sakes.”
He planted his hands on either side of her, barricading her against the wall with his muscle-corded arms and broad chest. “Nay,” he repeated. “I willnae. I cannae.”
“Callum—”
“I am no’ going to marry Aileas.”
“What? But your alliance—”
He moved closer, and she could feel the heat and frustration radiating from his powerful body.
“I will find another way. I have to. Dinnae ye understand, Caroline? I cannae marry another when I love ye.”
“You…” The whole world went quiet except for the rush of blood in Caroline’s ears. Her heart stuttered, then hammered hard against her ribs. “You love me?”
“Aye. I love ye, Caroline. I am mad with loving ye, wanting ye, needing y
e.”
“I love you too,” she breathed. “God, how I love you.”
In less than a heartbeat, he’d closed the distance between them. He yanked the satchel over her head and tossed it aside, then pressed her into the stone wall, his hands in her hair, around her waist, gripping her hips. When his lips found hers, it was as if her whole body had been set aflame.
This time, there was nothing gentle about his kiss. It was demanding and fierce, stealing her breath and sending need spiraling through her. She surrendered to him, to the wild torrent of sensations. He invaded her mouth with his velvet tongue, delving deep and tangling with her in an erotic promise of what was to come.
And this time, she knew, there would be no drawing back, no pulling away.
His hands slid up her waist to her breasts, cupping and kneading her. But it wasn’t enough, for he reached up and tugged at the neckline of her gown. She heard a lace on the back of her dress pop, but she didn’t care, for in the next moment, the cool night air brushed over her exposed breasts.
Just as swiftly, he broke their kiss and dipped his head to drag his hot tongue over one pearled nipple.
Caroline sucked in a hard breath. “Yes.” She sank her fingers into his hair as he teased her with his tongue. A hand rose to cup her other breast, the calluses on his palms sending electric jolts of pleasure through her.
With his hips pinned against hers, she could feel the hard length of his cock already straining against his trews. But when she reached down for him, he moved out of her grasp.
“I’ve dreamt of tasting ye,” he rasped, dropping to his knees before her. “And then of feeling ye come undone when I’m inside ye.”
God, yes. She leaned against the wall, uncaring of the stones biting into her back as he dragged her skirts up.
She shivered as the air brushed her bare thighs above her stockings. When he had her skirts bunched around her waist, he touched her there, running his fingers along her sensitive skin. Her knees quaked until he gripped one of her hips, steadying her.