I get off my seat. “You guys catch up. I’ll return later.” I’d like to give them some alone time together.
“Where do you travel to, my love?” Damarian asks.
“To the Emerald clan. I need to speak with Kyle.”
Chapter Five
The Emerald colony, like the Sapphire, is bursting with merpeople of all different colors. I’m not sure if more have integrated since last year, but it’s amazing to see them all interacting and getting along. Not that they were at war before Kiander and Flora mated, but they kept to themselves and hardly bonded with someone outside their clan. A Violet mermaid and Emerald merman swim past me, the merman carrying a small child with a violet tail on his back. Her arms are wrapped tightly around his neck and she pumps her little tail in sync with her father. She must be no more than two years old, and from the way she swooshes of her tail, I see she has inherited the aggressiveness of the Violet clan.
“Cassie.”
I turn to my left and find Kyle floating there with another Emerald merman.
“Hi, Kyle,” I say.
He returns the greeting and introduces me to his friend. Then he lowers his head. “Please tell me you haven’t come to bite my head off.”
I sigh. “Can we talk in private?”
“Sure.” He turns to his friend. “It will be no bother to help you hunt for the fish tomorrow. I know your mate will be very pleased.”
His friend lowers his head. “Many thanks, Kyler.” He nods to me. “Farewell, Cassie of the Sapphire clan.”
“Nice to meet you.”
Kyle leads me out of the Emerald colony and to a small area with many stones to sit on. “He wants to do something special for his mate,” he tells me. “They had their mating ceremony just last week. His mate loves a certain kind of fish. I promised I’d help him search for it.”
“You’re a good friend,” I say.
He grimaces. “But a rotten boyfriend?”
“What happened between you and Leah?”
He stares down at the ocean floor. “You visited many times, but this is the first time you’re asking me.”
I fold my arms across my chest. “I finally got it out of Leah. Now I want to hear your side.”
“Cassie—”
“I’d rather not get involved, Kyle. It’s your business. But Leah is…she’s…”
“I know. A mess.”
“Is that why you left her?”
He holds up his hands. “I didn’t leave her. I never left her.”
“Then…?”
He runs his hand down his face. “We fight all the time and want to rip each other’s throats out. But you know what? I love it. And so does she. I’ve tried to get together with so many females when I returned to the sea. But I didn’t feel like any of them understood me. How could they? The only life they’ve ever known is the one in the ocean. Leah knows about this world. Talking to her about it makes me feel closer to her. And she understands what it’s like to be alone. Sometimes our attraction to each other is so strong that we don’t think clearly. On time we almost…” He swallows. “I don’t know what I’d do to myself if I doomed her to a fate she doesn’t want.”
I take his hand.
“What’s the solution, then? That I should throw my life away and live on land? When I was banished, all I wanted was to return to the sea. I missed my family, my friends, my life. I can go right now to King Kiander and Queen Flora and ask them to banish me. I won’t be able to see my family ever again. How could I do that to them? And what if things don’t work out between Leah and me? You and Damarian are lucky you are soulmates and are meant for each other, but not every merperson ends up happily ever after. Of course the love grows between them after many moons, but it’s not always like what you and Damarian have. I may be stuck with someone for all eternity and live a miserable life.”
I don’t say anything because I don’t know what to say. I remember the time Damarian first told me how merpeople mate for life. I thought it was wonderful, before he explained that not everyone gets their happily ever after. He was referring to having to mate with Flora. Damarian needed to meet the right person. So does Kyle. But is Leah the right person for him?
“Instead of fighting about silly things,” he says, “Leah and I fought about serious things. Apparently she doesn’t love me enough to take on the same life you’ve taken on so that you can have a future with Damarian.” He shakes his head. “Who I am kidding? She’d never love me, not when he heart still yearns for Jace.”
“She’s trying to move on, Kyle. She just needs patience.”
“How long can I wait? Everyone around me are having kids. That’s how life is here. My soulmate might be out there waiting for me. My mother doesn’t say anything, but I see it in her eyes. I’m her only child. She wants grandchildren.”
“Kyle, please don’t make decisions based on what other people want from you. Do what you want.”
He leaps off the chair and throws his hands up. “But I don’t know what I want. I mean, I know I want to be bonded for all eternity to the right person. But where the hell is she already? I’ve been waiting for years.” He slams himself on the chair, his chest heaving.
I get up and crouch near him. “If you want Leah, go get her. If you don’t, please let her go.” I squeeze his shoulder. “I don’t know what else I can tell you.”
“Thanks anyway.”
I hug him. “You mean a lot to me. You’re one of my closest friends. All I want is to see you happy. Don’t despair, okay?”
He gives me a small smile. “I’ll try my hardest.” He waves me off. “Now go back to your family. I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure? I’d hate to leave you like this.”
“I’m sure. I need to make sense of some things.”
I give his hand a quick squeeze before swimming away. Then I turn around. “Kyle?”
“Yeah?”
“For the wedding, do you want to come on land or stay by the shore as a merman?”
He averts his gaze to his tail. “What does she want?”
“She doesn’t care. Well, that’s what she says. I know she cares or else she wouldn’t be with Sexy Guy.”
His head snaps up. “Who?”
I wave my hand. “No one.”
He gets off the chair and swims over. “She’s with someone?”
“Why do you care?”
“I don’t know.”
I hug him again. “I can’t tell you what you should do. Just listen to your heart. That’s what Damarian and I have always done.”
He returns the hug. “Why are these things never easy?”
***
It’s nighttime by the time I get back to Damarian’s family’s cave. No one is in the main room—they are most probably already in bed. When I enter Damarian’s room, which technically is no longer his room but ours, I find him sitting inside the large oyster shell in the center. He perks up when he sees me.
“Cassie, my love. I was starting to grow apprehensive. Where have you been?” He closes his hands around my waist and tugs me toward him, tucking me to his body so that we fit together in all the right places.
“Sorry for worrying you. I was out exploring after I met with Kyle.” I press a kiss to his shoulder. “I just wanted you to spend some time with your family without me. I feel so bad that you hardly see them.”
He puts his finger under my chin and lifts it, forcing me to look into his eyes. “Please do not carry any guilt. I am content with how things are, because I love you and wish to have a future with you. I very much appreciate you giving me the opportunity to be with my family, but you need not leave me alone with them. They love you and wish to spend time with you as well.”
“I just wish there was an easier way. I know, I’ve been saying this for the past two years.”
He lowers me down on the oyster shell and crawls on top of me, locking one hand through mine and raising it above my head. “This is the best way, my beautiful Cassie. And p
erhaps one day they will visit us on land, as they have done on our anniversary.”
I’m not sure how willing they’d be, since they haven’t stepped foot on land since that day. They had a great time and loved exploring land. But I understand how scary it can be. Like Damarian says, maybe one day.
“Now that we have been apart for too long—”
“Much, much too long.”
“—we must make up for it.” He dips his head to capture my lips with his. I throw my head back and kiss him just as fervently as he kisses me, as though our hearts and souls are making up for the hours we spent apart.
But something is wrong. Very wrong.
I pull away.
“Cassie?” He touches my cheek. “What is the matter?”
I search his eyes. He didn’t feel…? Shaking my head, I say, “Never mind,” and pull his mouth back to mine.
The strange feeling is still there. As I continue moving my lips over his, I realize what’s wrong. Since the moment we shared our first kiss two years ago, I have felt a fire between us, a passion and love so strong it was out of this world. Every kiss in itself held a million promises and every touch carried all the memories we’ve had together. His kisses made every part of my body throb in yearning, the pleasure he gave me ignited feelings in me I knew I could never experience anywhere else or with anyone else. When we touched, it wasn’t just physically, but beyond what the mind can fathom.
I don’t feel any of that now. Not one bit.
I shift away. “Wait.”
“Cassie?” He touches my cheek again. “Am I hurting you? I did not intend to. I only wish to please you.”
My eyes continue searching his. He doesn’t feel the same way I do. “I, um…”
“My love, what is it?”
I can’t tell him kissing him feels like kissing a shower door. He’ll be crushed. I put on a smile. “Never mind. Please continue.”
“Are you certain?”
I grab his shoulders and spin us around so that I’m on top. “I’ll show you how certain I am.”
Being the active one doesn’t change anything. It still feels like I’m kissing a shower door. What’s going on? I’ve never felt this way before. It’s scaring me.
Maybe I’m just tired. I explored places I’ve never seen before and that took up a lot of my energy. I’m sure everything will be okay in the morning.
Chapter Six
I wake up snuggled in Damarian’s strong, protective arms, my tail curled around his in our oyster shell. It doesn’t take long for the events of last night to cloud my head. I stare down at my merman, watching the way his gills expand and contract peacefully. I love watching him sleep. Other than the fact that he looks adorable and pretty darn sexy, he always looks like he’s happy in his sleep. Many times it’s because he’s having an awesome dream—I should know, since I’ve been pulled into some of them—but mostly because he’s truly content with his life. I wish I could give more to him, especially with spending more time with his family, but he constantly tells me it’s enough that he’s with me. I guess I should be thankful that we can even have a life together and that we have the ability to shift into humans and merpeople at will. Only two years ago, we weren’t sure of anything.
I gently push some of his golden hair out of his eyes and kiss the spot near it. He moans in pleasure, a large smile on his face.
My lips feel tingly. The same kind of tingly I get every time they make contact with his skin. I trail them down the side of his face, once again feeling them tingle. My whole body sighs in relief. Yesterday was just a fluke.
“Mmm, my love,” Damarian murmurs as my lips continue their trek down his face.
I move to the other side of his face.
“My beautiful mate,” he murmurs again. He opens his eyes and his face brightens at the sight of me. “Good morning.” He reaches to grab me by the waist and pull me closer to his body, but I dodge him.
“No way. This time I’m the one in charge.” I press down on his shoulders so that he’s flat on his back and slide on top of him. “Hmm, what should we start with first? Your hair?” I run my hands through it. “Even in the ocean it’s so silky smooth. I remember the first time I touched it, when you were passed out on the beach. I couldn’t believe how soft it was.”
Damarian’s hands tangle in my hair, gently tugging on the strands. “Your hair is always beautiful, whether you are a human or a child of the sea.”
I put my hand on his lips. “Shh. This isn’t about me but you. So, where to next to? Your forehead?” I lean closer to brush my lips across the length of it. “You know what’s so great about your forehead, Damarian? It’s a long patch of skin, the perfect spot to place all different kinds of kisses. Small ones.” I give him a few quick pecks. “Medium ones.” I open my mouth and press a few small kisses there. “And long ones.” I touch my lips to his and leave it there for a few seconds before removing them and moving to the next spot. With every kiss I give him, my stomach gets all twisted and every part of me engulfs in fervor. I may not be the receiver, but I feel it almost as much as him.
“Cassie…” he breathes heavily.
“Now we’ll move onto the next area. Yep, the eyes. And what pretty eyes they are.” I bend closer to lay a soft kiss on each one. “I remember how mesmerizing they were the first time I saw them. I was on the boulder, and the first thing I saw were your eyes. I thought you were an angel.” I give them each another tender kiss. “I love your eyes, my merman. Everything you feel is written inside them. I can stare into them all day.”
His breathing has gotten very laborious and it appears as though he can barely keep his eyes open.
I nuzzle his nose with mine. “I love the effect I have on you.”
“I love the effect I have on you,” he says.
“But this is my time now.” I tap his nose, then look down at his lips. “Ooh, what do we have here?” I rub my fingers against them. “They look like very kissable. Do you want me to kiss you there, Damarian?”
“Yes,” he groans. “Please.”
“Only because you asked so nicely.” I push my lips into his. All the doubt I had from last night flies out of my head like a bird zapped with a super speed. My entire body melts into his as my mouth moves over him in desperation. I have felt this way many times in the past, when we fought so hard to be together, when we thought we’d never see each other again, when I thought I would lose him forever. But this is different. As our lips dance together in their own special beat, I’m reminded that our love is always and constant and that nothing will tear us apart. Never.
I don’t feel my fingers and toes. My stomach twists in all different directions I wonder if it will just slide out of me. Our tails roll over each other’s almost as desperately as our lips.
When we break apart, every part of me gets ice cold. Damarian must feel the same way, because he tucks me close to his body. Our gills are expanding and contracting so violently I wonder if we will ever catch our breaths.
His eyes heavy, Damarian says, “Thank you, my sweet Cassie. I love you so very much.”
Though my head is fuzzy and my body still numb, I manage to laugh. “You don’t have to thank me.”
He kisses my temple. “Yes I do. For I want you to comprehend how much you mean to me and how much I appreciate you and all that you do for me. I cannot thank you enough, my Cassie. You are so very wonderful.”
I shake my head, placing my finger over his lips. “You’re the wonderful one. And don’t you dare try to refute. This will take us all day.”
He opens his mouth to take in the finger that’s on his lips. “Damarian!”
“Every part of you that I can kiss, I shall,” he says with a wide grin. And before I can blink, he spins us around so fast that the next thing I know, I’m lying on my back and he’s on top of me. He grins again. “Now I am in charge.”
I playfully slap his chest. “Do you always have to one-up me?”
“Naturally.”
&
nbsp; Once he’s done, I’m so tired I just want to go back to sleep. But we promised Flora and Kiander that we’d stop by today.
Syren and Kiandra are eating at the table. Ryter and Zarya woke up early to go exploring and the twins are still in bed. Damarian and I devour fish like we haven’t eaten in days.
“Please send our love to Kiander, Flora and little Saeria,” Kiandra says as we get ready to leave.
“And hand her this.” Syren places a tiny, bright yellow fish in Damarian’s hand. “I hunted it myself this morning specifically for her.”
“Certainly, Father.”
Shoney races to us as soon as we’re close to the exit of the Sapphire colony. May I accompany you?
Of course, I tell her.
She swims over to the other great whites patrolling the area and gives them orders, then makes her way back to us.
So how is it going? I ask.
All is well. We no longer worry about the humans drawing too near to the colonies. What of you? Is life all right on land?
All is well, Damarian says. We are very much content with our life on land.
Shoney nods curtly.
I sometimes get a feeling, due to our shark/mermaid bond, that a part of her wishes we would abandon our life on land and live in the ocean only. I would have to travel to land every so often and switch to a human so we won’t have another incident of me shifting back into a human thousands of feet in the ocean. But then the other part of her wants to reprimand the other side, because she knows how much I love being a human and how I don’t want to cut myself off from my family. Shoney’s a bit of a loner and has a hard time growing close to others. That’s why she doesn’t want to let me go.
I take her fin. Do you think you’ll ever meet a nice great white and have some pups?
She gives me a face like I fell from the sky. Why would I want that?
I hold up my hands. Just wondering.
I am not made to mate.
Sure.
She glares at me.
It doesn’t hurt to have a male friend, I point out.
Another glare.
Too bad Fiske is much younger than you. But does that even matter? He’s an adult now.
Merman's Forever (Merman's Kiss, Book 6) Page 4
