He kissed like he talked; slow, clear, concise. Not sloppy or mushy or too fast. Just perfectly nice. Kissing Cole reminded her of being a child and running through fields of mustard flowers...simply exhilarating. She liked Cole Fletcher, and at the moment, she couldn’t think of one reason why they shouldn’t be together.
He pulled away, concern etched across his brow.
“We have the house to ourselves,” she said.
“What about your injuries?”
“You were on the practice field all last week. You probably have a few bruises of your own.”
“Maybe I should carry you up those stairs, take off your clothes, and we can compare.”
“I think that’s a fine idea.”
He tilted his head.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m just wondering if this is some sort of trick.”
“No tricks. Do you have any condoms?”
“In my bag in the car.”
“Always prepared,” she said. “Like a boy scout. I like that.”
“Then you’ll be glad to know I got the Paul Bunyan Woodsman Award when I was twelve.”
“Impressive. Now are you going to start rubbing sticks together or are we going upstairs to my bedroom?”
“Don’t you move...I’ll be right back.”
She watched him go and she knew he’d be quick. He was one of the leading NFL quarterbacks after all. Her first pro athlete. Taller than the average bear. Lean and muscular. Too handsome for his own good. A great kisser. She had absolutely nothing to lose.
#
While cicadas droned in the distance and the sun dipped low over the horizon, Max watched everyone gather around the campfire on the beach. It was Sunday night. The Dutton clan always gathered on the beach after a weekend at the lake. It was tradition.
Molly and her friend passed out wooden sticks with marshmallows stuck on the ends for S’mores, because according to Molly, no trip to a lake was complete without them.
Kari sat cross-legged in the sand opposite from where he stood. She wore a large grey sweatshirt that covered her knees. The flames flickered, casting shadows across her face as she talked and laughed with Jill. Kari must have sensed him watching because she glanced at him, the firelight dancing in her eyes. Still so beautiful after all these years, everything he could ever ask for in a woman: beautiful, stubborn, strong, and honest. He’d blamed her for keeping Molly from him, but she’d been telling the truth all along. He was an idiot, but tonight, if everything went as planned, he hoped to make up for lost time.
“I still can’t believe Mom and Hank left without saying goodbye,” Breanne said.
“Yeah, well, you know Mom,” Max said. “She does random things sometimes.”
“Are you talking about our Mom?” Jill wanted to know. “Straight-laced, organized, perfect Mom?”
“Yeah, that one.” Max held up his water bottle. “Here’s to another great weekend at the lake.”
“Except that Lindsay got hurt riding the inner tube,” Molly reminded him.
“And Mom and Hank left early,” Breanne added. “I’m worried about her. I don’t think she’s ever left the lake early before.”
“And Matthew stubbed his toe,” his niece reminded him.
“Well yeah,” Max said, “I guess those things you all mentioned sort of put a damper on things, but we still had fun, right?” He looked from face to face.
Everybody sort of nodded as he caught their gaze, one after another, as if he was twisting their arms and making them agree.
“We have much to be thankful for,” he said. “Nicole’s here,” he said, raising his bottle to the air.
Everybody raised their water bottle or their S’more—whatever happened to be in their hand.
“I must admit, the weather couldn’t have been better,” Dan added, trying to be helpful.
“Look at that!” Molly said, pointing toward the sky. “It’s the big dipper.”
Max looked up.
“My teacher said the “handles” of the dippers represent the ‘tails’ of ancient bears.”
His heart beat a little faster. “That’s right,” Max said, chills running up his spine.
“I’ve never heard of that before,” Dan said, “and I have a minor in astronomy.”
“The tails became long,” Molly continued, “after Zeus grabbed the bears by their tails and swung them around and around before he threw them into the sky.”
Max stared upward, his eyes unblinking. A knot formed in his throat. Dad was watching over them after all.
The baby’s wails sounded over the monitor, bringing Max back to the matter at hand.
“We better get going,” Dan said as he helped Sally to her feet. “I have to work tomorrow.”
Panic set in. Max thought he’d have more time, but it was now or never...before everyone left and ruined his surprise. “Before you go,” Max said, stopping Dan and Sally from leaving. “I have something I want to say.” He made his way around the fire until he was standing in front of Kari.
He took her hand in his.
Her eyebrows knitted together.
“I’ve missed you,” he said.
Smoke from the fire blew her way, and she used her free hand to wave the smoke out of her face. Then she covered her mouth and coughed.
“Are you alright?”
She nodded.
He made sure Dan and Sally were still there and then he cleared his throat and said, “I miss having you badger me all day about protein and fat. You know, telling me how all that crap fits into a healthy diet.”
She laughed at him and then attempted to pull her hand away, but he stopped her.
“I had a hell of a craving for fried chicken last week,” he said, “but I thought of you, and I held off.”
“That’s nice.” She looked about, embarrassed, then pulled her hand from his. Clearly, he was losing her attention. He needed to get to the point.
“Max,” Sally said in exasperation. “The baby is crying. I’ve got to go. Thanks for—”
Exasperated, Max took Kari’s hand again and dropped down on one knee. “Will you marry me?”
Sally gasped, then pointed and waved her hand, gesturing for Dan to go get the baby.
Jill started to cry from sheer happiness. He knew that because everything made Jill cry in sheer happiness.
Fred patted Max on the back. “Congratulations you two.”
“Oh, Kari,” Breanne said. “This is so exciting. We’ll be sisters-in-law. I had no idea.”
A shaky laugh escaped Kari’s lips as she looked at Max, her eyes wide and unblinking. “Are you serious?”
“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my life. Marry me. Make me the happiest man in the world.”
“Two days ago you were hardly talking to me.”
Fred drew his hand away and took a couple of baby steps back.
“Two days ago I was a fool,” Max said.
Kari’s eyes narrowed. “Why are you doing this?”
“Molly deserves to have a family, don’t you think?”
“She has a family.”
“Don’t you see?” he asked, wondering why she hadn’t jumped into his arms and started kissing him yet. “There was a reason you walked into Dr. Stone’s office that day. I feel as if I’ve spent my entire life waiting for you to show up. For the first time in my life, I feel as if I’ve found my other half. You complete me.”
Sally groaned and turned to Nicole. “Did he just say what I think he said?”
“Come on kids,” Jill said in a soft voice, gathering them all together. “It’s time to go.”
“Ever since he woke up this morning, he’s been acting strange,” Breanne said.
“Your mother told you, didn’t she?” Kari asked Max. “That’s why she left, isn’t it?”
Breanne wrinkled her nose. “Told him what?”
“Yes,” Max said. “She gave me the letters.”
“What letters?” Breanne asked
, but nobody paid her any mind.
Kari turned toward Molly. “Come on, Molly. You and Amanda gather your things. It’s time for us to go home.” She turned her gaze on Breanne. “Do you think you and Nicole could give us a ride home?”
Max watched Kari walk away. Then he turned and noticed everybody gesturing for him to follow her. So he did.
“Don’t do this to us,” Max said once he caught up to her.
She grunted.
“Why are you so angry?” he asked, struggling to keep up. “What did I do?”
He followed her through the kitchen and up the stairs to one of many bedrooms where he watched her grab her luggage and put her purse strap over her shoulder. Kari turned on him then. The old flare was back in her eyes. “You’re all the things Breanne, Lindsay, and Patti Bertram said you were.”
“Who’s Patti Bertram?”
“An advice columnist for the—oh, for Pete’s sake, never mind. It doesn’t matter. You’re a toxic-bachelor, a stringer, a low-down dirty snake.”
“Because I asked you to marry me?”
“Yes! Of course, because you asked me to marry you.” Kari peeked out the door, making sure nobody was within earshot. “Did you see Molly’s face when you got down on your knee and proposed?”
“No. Why? Was she upset?”
“She looked like the happiest little girl in the world.”
“That’s good then...right?”
“That’s horrible. How could you do that to me in front of Molly?”
“I thought she’d be happy about it.”
“Guess who’s going to be the bad guy when she finds out I said no?”
“You’re going to say, no?”
Her growl turned into a hiss.
“I’m trying to understand,” he said. “I really thought you would want this...you know a family...for Molly.”
She crossed her arms tight against her chest. “Tell me why you want to marry me, Max.”
He shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “You’re my dream girl,” he said, as if that explained everything.
She waited.
“You’re honest,” he said, pointing a finger for good measure. “You’re loyal, too, and a terrific mother. Your smile, look at it,” he pointed at the mirror behind her. “It lights up a room. You’re confident and determined and you’re a hard worker,” he added when she refused to take a peek in the mirror. “I like determination in a woman.”
“What about love, Max?”
“I love everything about you.”
“But you’re not in love with me, Max. Love is based on trust. I asked you to believe in me, but something stopped you from doing so.” She sighed. “That’s not a good foundation for marriage.”
He struggled for the right words, something that would make her see that they should be together, but nothing came to him.
“You don’t have to marry me so you can be close to Molly. I’ll never come between you two, but you know what?”
“What?” he asked, his insides filled with hope.
“I am going to say no because I want to hold out for the crazy sort of love—the unconditional kind of love that makes a man do crazy things. The lasso the moon kind of love,” she said right before she walked out the door, leaving him feeling like a moth that had been headed blissfully for the light and just got zapped.
#
Lindsay lay flat on her back on the bed. She stared at the ceiling as she wondered what the hell had happened. It was Sunday morning, practically afternoon. Cole was in the shower.
Her world had changed last night. Yes, that’s what had happened. She’d never in her life felt so confused, so free, so damn satisfied. Cole had spent most of the night pleasuring her in every way possible. And she’d spent the other half of the night returning the favor. There wasn’t anything she didn’t like about Cole Fletcher. Not one thing. Absurd. Ridiculous. But it was true. She jerked upright, her heart rate soaring as it dawned on her.
She was falling in love with Cole Fletcher.
How the hell had that happened? She hadn’t even seen it coming. She pushed sex-tangled hair out of her face and tried to think of some sort of loophole she could crawl out of. This couldn’t be love. It was lust. That’s all it was, she told herself. She breathed easier. There, that was better...much better.
She couldn’t fall in love with anyone, especially a pro-football player with as many female fans as Brad Pitt. How would she handle watching other women throw their underwear at him and slip him their phone number at every turn?
If she ever fell in love with a man it was going to be a businessman, an accountant, or maybe a CEO. A family man who didn’t turn ladies heads; a nice clean cut sort of guy, not too tall, not too short. What the hell was she thinking? She didn’t even want a man. Sheesh. Although she wasn’t the man-hater she liked to pretend to be, the truth was she could easily live the rest of her days without a man if she had to. She was content all on her own. Never mind that she wanted lots of kids. She’d been watching kids all of her life. She certainly didn’t mind doing it all by herself. She wasn’t like some women who felt they needed a man to make them whole. She’d spent way too long planning her future to throw it all away just because Cole Fletcher decided to come into her life and show her what a real man could do to her. And man, oh man, could he do things to her. He’d given her more orgasms last night than she’d had in her entire life. She hadn’t realized she had so many erogenous zones until Cole pointed them all out.
She flopped back onto the mounds of pillows lining her headboard. She couldn’t do this. She couldn’t let last night change things, upset the stable life she’d set up for herself. This thing between her and Cole had to end before things got out of hand. A few orgasms was one thing, but she actually liked the guy. That wasn’t cool. If she wasn’t careful, she’d end up sitting home while Cole Fletcher traveled from game to game, his groupies always close enough to make him an offer he might not be able to refuse. That would drive her nuts. How many seasons before she’d become insecure and start begging for his attention? How many months before he tired of her?
She hissed. Two? Three? Six, if she was really lucky?
God, she never should have slept with him. His first game was this weekend. He’d be heading for the Bay Area a few days after that. She had a business to run. A thriving business with a waiting list for God’s sake. It didn’t matter how many times she raised her prices. She was good at what she did. The kids loved her and she loved them. She couldn’t let them down. She couldn’t let herself down.
Sliding off the bed, she hobbled across the room to her dresser, opened the drawer and pulled out a pair of panties. She slid them on, then hobbled back to the end of the bed to get her T-shirt. As she slid her arms into the sleeves, Cole came out of the bathroom wearing a pair of light blue silk boxers.
His body was amazing. He had long powerful legs. Muscular arms and thick muscular shoulders. Narrow waist. Just enough golden-tipped hair across his chest to make her want to run her hands over him one last time, just for the hell of it.
“Hey, what are you doing walking around? Get back in bed. Doctor’s orders.”
She kept her gaze on the floor, pretending to search for something. “I forgot about some things that I need to get done today,” she told him. “I need you to go.”
He padded across the carpet toward her and when she didn’t look at him, he reached down and brushed the pad of his thumb over her jaw. “What’s the matter?”
“I just need you to go, okay?”
“Let me make you breakfast. You’re always taking care of everyone else. You deserve to be pampered.” His voice was tender and gentle just like his lovemaking.
If he stayed another minute, she’d be begging him to marry her. Pathetic. “You have to go. I can’t explain why exactly, you just need to go.”
He headed across the room, grabbed his pants and slid them on. “Can you at least tell me why the rush?”
“I don�
�t understand why you’re making such a big deal about this,” she said.
He rubbed his jaw. “It was the dirty talk, wasn’t it?”
“No.” She liked the dirty talk. The dirty talk was awesome. The way he’d described the things he was going to do to her before he did them had been incredibly sexy. Gosh, yeah, she had it bad for him. He definitely needed to go.
He found his shirt. “Sure you don’t want to talk about this?”
“Positive.”
“Okay,” he said, sliding his shirt over his head. “If you want me to go, I’ll go.”
He was angry. She could hear resentment in his voice. What had she expected? For him to take her in his arms and kiss her senseless until she forgot why she’d asked him to leave?
A few minutes later, she heard the jangle of his keys. “I’ll call you later.”
CHAPTER 20
A week later, Kari, Lindsay, Molly and all four of Lindsay’s daycare kids sat around the picnic bench in the backyard and picked at their lunch.
Kari took three stabs at her salad with her fork and gave up.
Lindsay appeared lost in her thoughts. She still had a limp from her accident, but she no longer needed to use crutches, and the bruise on her face had almost disappeared.
The twins threw bread crumbs at each other, back and forth across the table, laughing every time they struck their targets.
Molly looked from Lindsay to Kari and sighed.
The littlest boy, Jonathan, looked at Molly and said, “Are they sick?”
“Yeah. Love sick.”
Lindsay’s brows snapped together. “Who’s love sick?”
“You and Mom.”
Kari frowned. “Summer school starts next week,” she told Molly. “Shouldn’t you be reading one of those books on the reading list?”
“You may be right about your mom,” Lindsay said, “but I don’t do love sick.”
Kari stood, picked up her paper plate and dropped it in the garbage can a few feet away. “I’m fine,” she said to Lindsay and Molly, “and I’m only going to say this once, so listen carefully. Max is not in love with me. He’s going through a phase. He’s older now and he’s feeling pressure from his biological clock, no doubt telling him it’s time to settle down. But he’s not ready.” She grabbed one of the tabloids she’d bought now lying in a heap on the center of the table. “Exhibit A,” she said, flipping through the pages until she saw Max. She held it up and tapped her finger on the picture of Max with four women standing next to him. “Max couldn’t devote himself to one woman in a million years.”
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