by Bella Jewel
Then she walks past, shoving her shoulder into his as she does.
I love my best friend. I love her more than life.
She disappears inside, and I look to Ethan, saying, “I’m not in the mood for you tonight, Ethan. I’m really not.”
His face twists, like my words pain him, and he says, “Let me talk to you. Five minutes, it’s all I’m asking.”
I stare at him. “Do you know what happened to me tonight?”
He studies me, really taking me in, and his face hardens. “What did they do?”
“They sent people into the bar I was in to call me killer and other horrible names and torment me about Celia in front of everyone. That’s what they did. They’re not going to stop until I crumble. But you already know that, don’t you?”
His fists clench with anger. “I had nothing to do with that, or anything they’ve done to you since you left that prison.”
“You expect me to believe that?” I snap.
“If you let me speak with you, I can explain it ...”
“You mean explain how you used me to help out with their sick little plan. How you pretended to be my friend so they could torment me?”
“I am your friend, Callie,” he argues.
I lean in close to him. “Don’t you fucking ever use that word to me again. You don’t know the meaning of the word friend.”
He looks like I’ve slapped him, but I don’t care.
I don’t care because that’s how I feel every second of every day.
“Give me five minutes, and then, if you never want to speak to me again, I’ll leave you alone.”
I stare at him, rage coursing through my body like a god damned hurricane just building, waiting to explode and destroy everything in its path.
“Five minutes,” I mutter. “Not a second longer.”
He nods.
I don’t move to sit or go inside. I stay standing right where I am and wait. I don’t know if I’m ready to hear what he’s going to say to me, but at the same time, part of me has been desperate to know this story from the moment I found out who they were. I want to know all of it, even if it hurts.
“I grew up with Tanner, Andrea, and Celia,” Ethan tells me. “I lived just down the road, and Tanner was my best friend in school. Celia, she was like the little sister I never had. I had a hard upbringing, things weren’t always easy for me, but that family made me feel like I had a home, always. They kept me afloat during times when I had nothing, when I thought I was going to sink.”
I swallow but say nothing, just hold his eyes. Emotionless.
“When Celia died, it was hard. It was hard on everyone. Tanner was away serving, and the two of us hadn’t spoken for a few months because I didn’t go with him. Their parents were going through a really hard time. Then they lost Celia. In the most tragic way. When Tanner came home and found out what happened, he went into a rage. He wanted revenge. He wanted you to suffer. You took away the only thing in this world Tanner Yates has ever truly cared about.”
“Why?” I ask, my voice husky. “Why did he care about her so much?”
“Because he had to protect her. Because she looked up to him. Because without her, he wasn’t complete. They had an incredible bond, if someone picked on Celia, Tanner would bring them down in any way he could. If Celia was unhappy, Tanner would go to great lengths to make her happy. She brought this light into his life. She had this spirit that was so ... pure. The two of them were close, but only he could tell you more in-depth why that was.”
I nod, crossing my arms, trying to keep a barrier up between us, even though my chest is aching and my stomach is doing flip flops.
“When Celia died, he lost it. He just ... lost it. As I said, he wanted you to suffer. He wanted you to pay for taking her away. When we found out where you were getting locked up, he saw it as a chance for me to get in and create the ultimate revenge plan. I could be your guard. I could make sure you didn’t have it easy. When you got out, he would make sure you never lived a happy moment in your life again, so you knew what it would feel like for him, what it feels like for him every day.”
I swallow what feels like a hard lump stuck in my throat. I close my eyes and take a deep shaky breath, emotions that I can’t quite process radiating through my body.
“It was an accident,” I whisper.
“I know,” Ethan tells me. “Within a few weeks of getting to know you, I could see that the person you had been painted as, was not correct. I believed your story. I saw the truth in your eyes. I knew that you weren’t bad, and that you weren’t at fault. I told them that I wasn’t going to keep helping them, and I pulled away. I swear to you, I stopped. I made sure you were protected. Tanner disowned me, and we stopped speaking.”
I rub my hands down my face and murmur, “You could have told me, Ethan. All those times I told you things were happening to me, you could have told me. You chose to let them keep doing those things.”
Ethan nods, his face solemn. “Yeah, I know. Because they’re my family, because I know how broken Tanner is, because I thought maybe I could change it. I didn’t want them to get into trouble for it. I didn’t want them to hurt you. It was messed up.”
“I had a right to be warned. I had a right to know that the man I thought I was dating was only doing it to hurt me.”
“I tried to tell you to stay away from him.”
I shake my head, laughing bitterly. “You could have tried a little harder. You could have just told me what they were doing. You owed me that.”
“Yeah,” he agrees. “Yeah, I did owe you that. Look, I never meant to let you get hurt. I never meant to lie to you. Those people, they walked me through the worst times in my life, I felt like I owed them. I felt like I had betrayed them as it was, and let my family down, but then at the same time I really cared about you and ... it was fucked, Callie. If you have any idea what it was like for me ...”
“What it was like for you?” I whisper, my voice cracking. “What about what it was like for me? I trusted you. I thought you were the one true friend I had outside of Jo. I thought that I was going to come out into this life again and find my way. Instead, I’ve been tormented and attacked, and you knew all along and didn’t tell me. You stood back and watched it happen. If you wanted to, you could have found a way.”
Ethan exhales and closes his eyes. “You’re right, I could have. I’m sorry. I need you to know I’m sorry. For what it’s worth, you are my friend, and I care a great deal about you.”
“Not enough to be on my side,” I say, feeling my eyes burning with unshed tears. “Your five minutes is up.”
“Callie ...” he calls when I turn and walk toward the apartment.
I stop, but I don’t look back at him.
“I don’t want to not have you in my life,” he tells me, and my heart twists.
I look at him over my shoulder. “You should have thought of that before you did what you did. Goodbye, Ethan.”
I walk up to the front steps, and a tear rolls down my cheek.
A tear for the lies.
A tear for the betrayal.
A tear for the best friend I just lost.
“ARE YOU SURE ABOUT this?” Jo asks me, as I take a sheet of paper from the printer with the emails from Chase to Celia before she died.
“Yes,” I say, taking out three copies and standing. “It’s time.”
“Are you sure tonight is the night?”
“Yep,” I tell her. “Andrea asked me to go out with the girls, and Tanner has been trying to call, which he doesn’t do anymore. I know it’s because he’s trying to get an idea of where I’ll be and when. I also know that Tanner and Tatum are both free tonight, and Andrea has confirmed I’m coming three times, so I’m not silly, they have it planned for this evening.”
“How are we going to get back here again? Go over the plan so I’m clear.”
I nod. “We’re going to go out, all dressed up, because I have no doubt they’ll be watching us as we leav
e. We’re going to drive around the block, wait half an hour, text Andrea that we’re just stuck in traffic and that we’re nearly there. We’re also going to send her a selfie from the cab, big smiles, so she believes we’re on our way. Then we’re going to circle back around and see if they’re in the apartment. If they aren’t, we’re going to go inside, sit in the dark, and wait. If they are, we’re going to walk in, flick on the lights, and blow their damn minds.”
“Are you sure this is going to work?” Jo asks, looking a little concerned.
“This was your idea, honey,” I point out.
“Yes, I know, but the plan has so many holes ...”
“It does, but it’s the only one we have right now. It may not work, and if it doesn’t, we’ll find another way. I want them to be shocked. I want them to see that we’ve been one step ahead of them. I want them to truly know who they’re messing with.”
Jo nods, and then exhales. “Well then, let’s get ready to go out.”
I put the emails down on the table, and then Jo and I go inside and get ready for our night out with Andrea. We dress up, do our makeup, and I text Andrea a few times telling her we’re getting ready and how excited we are. She seems pumped and overly nice, so I’m plenty certain tonight is definitely the night they have planned to come into our apartment and find whatever it is they need to justify their horrible actions.
When we’re done, I put the emails in a folder and put them somewhere I can easily access them, and then I turn to Jo and put my hands on her shoulders. “Are you ready?”
She nods, exhaling loudly. “Yep, I’m ready. Let’s kick some ass.”
I smile at her, pushing down my nerves, and we head out. I lock the door as usual, and we make sure we laugh and make quite the spectacle as we wait for our cab. If someone is watching, I want them to see that we’re happy and we’re not suspicious, and we’re heading out for a night with the girls, none the wiser.
When our cab arrives, we climb in, and the nerves hit in full force. I have to push them down, though. I can’t show any emotion. When I do what I’m about to do, I have to bring out the Callie that I’ve tried very hard to push down. The cold one, the one who has seen pain and lived through hell. The one who doesn’t take any crap from anybody. I have to bring her out. I have to be strong, and I have to be determined.
“Time for a selfie?” I ask Jo.
She nods, and we snap a happy selfie, and then after about ten minutes text it to Andrea saying we’re in the cab and on our way. She sends back an excited text, and I lean forward to the cab drivee and say to him, “Here is fine.”
He pulls over and we pay him, getting out in a random location. Then, we wait another twenty minutes. I text Andrea telling her we’re stuck in traffic but we’re nearly there. She doesn’t seem suspicious judging by her quirky reply. Jo and I catch another cab back to my place, and when we arrive, the sun has just set, making the streets darker than usual, with only the streetlights giving a dull glow.
“Do you think they’re in there?” Jo asks after we’ve paid the cab a few houses down.
We slowly walk toward our apartment.
When we arrive at the front, nothing seems amiss. It appears to be dark inside, nothing suspicious happening at all.
Then I see a small flash of light coming from my bedroom window. It flickers past, so quickly I nearly miss it.
If it wasn’t for the fact that I’m looking for it, I probably wouldn’t have noticed it.
“Did you see that?” I whisper to Jo.
“Yes,” she says, her voice shaky. “They’re in there.”
“Are you ready?”
She nods.
“Let’s show them who they’re messing with.”
We make our way to the front door of the apartment and Jo very quietly unlocks it. I take a deep staggering breath, knowing that I have to be the strongest I’ve had to be in a long time when I walk through this door.
They can’t see weakness.
They can never see what they’ve done to me, because then they’ll know they’ve won.
They can never win.
We push the door open quietly, and I see the flash of light in the kitchen. Whoever is in there, shines the flashlight in our direction, having heard the door. It’s now or never.
I reach my hand to the side and I flick on the light.
I’m presented with exactly what I thought I’d be presented with.
Tanner, Tatum, and Garrett. All of them dressed in dark colors, holding flashlights. Garrett has clearly just come out of the hall, so I’m guessing it was him who was in my room. Tanner has my folder in his hands, the folder containing the emails. I don’t know if he’s opened it or not. Tatum is in the kitchen, I have no idea what he thought he’d find in there, but I’m guessing he was rummaging through the drawers.
For a moment, just a moment, the room is dead silent.
It’s my turn.
It’s finally my turn.
To speak. To have control.
I’m in charge now.
“Well,” I say, my voice husky and low, “would you look at what we have here?”
Nobody says anything.
I take a step into the room.
I’ve played over this scene in my head a million times, what I was going to say, how proud I was going to be to see the looks on their faces, knowing it was me who caught them in their little game. Now I’m here, though, the words aren’t coming. They’re not coming how I thought they would. So, I just say whatever comes to my mind first. I just say it how it is, in this very moment.
Right now.
“You didn’t honestly think I was so stupid that I wouldn’t catch onto your little plan, did you, Tanner?”
The look on his face as realization that I know what he’s doing washes over makes me feel powerful. It’s a shocked expression, slightly guilty, a little pissed, but mostly confused. He’s no doubt wondering how the hell I figured it out. He’s about to get his answers.
“Callie ...” he begins, but I raise a hand.
“Here’s what’s going to happen right now,” I say, my voice hard. “If you don’t want me to call the police and have you charged for breaking and entering, not to mention all the torment you’ve laid on me in the last month, then you’ll sit your fucking asses down, and you’ll hear what I have to say.”
Tatum glances at Tanner, but until that moment, his eyes have been on Jo. An unspoken conversation going on between them. I know her expression will be that of disappointment, and I know, deep down, that bothers him. Garrett doesn’t say a word, he just stands, watching it all unfold. Watching the truth slowly unravel.
“It wasn’t an option,” Jo mutters, her voice full of anger and disappointment. “Sit the hell down, or we call the cops.”
Tanner’s eyes lock onto mine and, for a moment, it feels like we’re the only two people in the room. So much passes between us. So much pain and anguish and heartache, but mostly betrayal. Brutal betrayal. He now knows that I know, and he can now see the true pain in my eyes as he realizes just how much he’s hurt me.
“There is nothing you can say that we haven’t already heard,” Tatum growls, crossing his arms. “You’re a killer. You know it. We know it. Everyone knows it.”
I look to him, and my voice is a low hiss when I say, “Are you sure about that, Tatum? Are you willing to bet that I don’t have anything to say that Tanner here might not have heard?”
Tatum’s face will live on in my memory. His expression changes, just for a second, to one of uncertainty. I know he’s wondering, deep down, if I do know something. He’s currently going over every single move he made when he had his brother’s name changed, when he helped him disappear, when he lied to his best friend. He’s making sure he had all his tracks covered. I know exactly what is swirling through his mind right now.
“Tatum is right,” Tanner finally speaks, his voice so thick with emotion, it is almost unrecognizable. What does he have to be emotional about? He’s a god
damned monster.
“Tatum is a liar, and I’m not going to give you another chance. Sit down and hear what I have to say, or I call the police. What’s it going to be, Tanner?”
His jaw ticks, but he moves toward the table and sits. Tatum slowly moves over, too, and takes a seat.
When they’re down, I walk toward Tanner and take a seat so I’m facing both of them. Jo stands behind me. Garrett crosses his arms, but he doesn’t say a word.
“I see you’ve found my folder,” I say to Tanner. “Good, because it has what you need to know inside.”
Tanner glances at Tatum again, and then opens the folder and looks down at the emails I’ve printed out. He reads them over, and it takes more than a few minutes for him to figure out what’s going on in them. Shaking his head in confusion, he looks up. “Where did you get these?”
“Allow me to explain,” I say, putting my elbows on the table and leaning forward. “You see, I know what happened the night I hit Celia Yates with my car. I know it, yet nobody believed me. Nobody except Jo, of course. When I got out of prison, I made it my mission to prove to the world that Celia killed herself. So, I broke into her house. You can only imagine, Tanner, what I found there.”
Tanner’s face changes, and his eyes flick left, then right, as he processes what I’m telling him.
“That’s right, Tanner Yates, I’ve known who you are for a few weeks now. I’ve known what you’ve been doing to me. I could have told you, but then I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy this moment where I throw the truth in your lying, backstabbing face.”
He opens his mouth to say something, but I put my hand up, my voice a whip. “Do not fucking open your mouth.”
His eyes flash, but I keep going.
“I decided I was going to prove that I wasn’t lying, so I looked further. I dug deeper. I found those emails on Celia’s laptop. I started piecing things together. First of all, Chase’s last name in the emails was different to the name he used at school, and I pieced together that Chase is Tatum’s brother, but you already know that. Celia and Chase were together, but something happened, something really bad, something that made Celia take her own life.”
