by Selena Kitt
“I don’t want you to feel ashamed about it, Kayla.”
Had he pretended it was me? Maybe that was the one question I wanted answered, only I didn’t know how to ask, so I remained silent.
“I hate that you paid the price for saying my name, but I don’t think I would’ve been able to…do what he demanded if you hadn’t.” He rolled over and faced me, close enough to breathe the same air. “I thought of you and that was enough to send me over the edge. I want you to know I wasn’t with her—every part of me was with you.”
I couldn’t resist kissing him. To hell with the consequences, to what was right and wrong. Getting involved with him was cruel and irresponsible, but I couldn’t fight the draw of him. He was my safety net, and I was falling headfirst toward concrete.
I hoped he was strong enough to catch me, because in that moment I was fresh out of strength.
For a few stolen moments, we lost ourselves in each other, our mutual moans the only sounds louder than my thumping heartbeat. Trapped underneath his body, I found freedom. We finally came up for air, and he dropped his forehead against mine.
“Kayla…” His breath caressed my lips, and I parted them, wanting more of him. “I want you so badly right now.”
“I want you too. That hasn’t changed from last night.”
He closed his eyes. “But sobriety has brought back reason.”
Sobriety had brought back a lot of things. “Yeah.” If we gave into our desire now, I might never know for certain, and I couldn’t move on with him until I knew it was for the right reasons.
My phone buzzed on the nightstand, and one glance told me it was Gage. I questioned why I didn’t just ignore the call—I had called in sick for a few days, after all. But the reasons were complicated, a mess of convoluted truth I didn’t want to deal with. Power still tipped in his favor; in the way I submitted to him, in the way I was compelled to answer simply because he called. And with four terse words that formed a demand, he had me sliding out of bed.
“Come into the office.”
Chapter Four
Checkmate
Ian wanted me to quit my job. He had driven me to get my car, but then he’d had to go to work. I still recalled the apprehension on his face, even now as I approached the fifth floor of Channing Enterprises. He had pleaded with me not to go.
Gage Channing is a monster.
He’ll only hurt you again.
At least let me go with you.
I’d agreed with the first two statements, but I wouldn’t let him take time off from his job to deal with my problems. He’d been dragged into my life enough already.
A ding announced the fifth floor, and as the doors slid open, I wondered what Gage wanted. After his non-reaction to the evidence I’d presented him with, I was more than curious. Maybe he was going to fire me. A part of me hoped he would so I wouldn’t have to face the decision of whether or not to put in my resignation. The idea of searching for a new job was a daunting one, though staying on as his personal assistant didn’t sit well either.
I exited the elevator, not at all recovered from Gage’s beating or my bar excursion, but at least no one would tell by looking at me. I wore my usual heels and skirt ensemble, only the inches on my shoes were shorter and the hem of my skirt longer than his more recent requirements. I looked like the put-together woman I wanted the world to see. No one would know that every inch of my body still ached from the impact of his whip.
“Good morning, Kayla.” Katherine’s sing-song greeting iced my blood. I avoided her smug face and rushed into Gage’s office without knocking. The door slammed shut behind me, making him jump.
“I’ll have to call you back,” he said into his cell. He ended the call and leaned back in his chair, staring at me, though instead of his usual cocky air, his face was bathed in uncertainty.
I hadn’t expected uncertainty. “I was debating whether or not to put in my resignation, but I can’t work here with Katherine.” How interesting that his presence didn’t bother me half as much as hers did.
Pinching the bridge of his nose, he closed his eyes, and I assumed he was suffering from the effects of his drinking binge. “I’ll have her transferred. I can’t fire her—she and I have an agreement.”
I bet. “Let me guess, her job back in exchange for destroying me?”
He ignored my scathing question and gestured to the seat in front of his desk. “Sit down. We have a few things to discuss.”
“I’ll stand, thank you. And you’re the one who needs to do the talking. Why is my ex blackmailing you? Is he doing it for money, or does it have something to do with me?”
“He thinks he can keep me away from you,” he said with a smirk. “Your ex is an ass.”
“A bit hypocritical, don’t you think?”
His face darkened, and he rose and rounded the desk.
I took a step back, remembering how he’d kissed me last night. “Don’t come any closer.”
“What do you think I’m gonna do, Kayla? Bend you over my desk and put a belt to your ass?” He had me against the door before I was able to blink. “You made it clear the rules have changed, remember?” His eyes lowered to my trembling mouth. “Only I’m a little unclear on what they are now. Am I still allowed to touch you?” He feathered his fingers across my nipples, as if testing how far he could push me. “Kiss you?” His words whispered across my lips, breath laced with the richness of coffee. “You didn’t seem to mind last night.”
“No, you don’t get to touch me.” I shoved him back a few inches, hating how he still had the power to make my pulse race. The bastard still turned me on; that out of everything pissed me off the most.
“I called you in here to negotiate my own terms.”
I raised a brow. “I didn’t realize you had anything left to negotiate with.”
He laughed. “You didn’t quite achieve checkmate yet—my king is still in the game, believe me.”
I flattened myself against the door, but it didn’t give me the distance I wanted. His chest felt like steel under my hands as I pushed against him. “I’ll scream.”
“Do it, then the cops can come and arrest you.” His grin was too triumphant, and I wondered how he’d so easily turned the tables on me.
“And you think the police will ignore your embezzlement? You’re not above the law, even though it’s clear you think otherwise.”
“You won’t turn me in.”
“Really? What makes you so certain?”
“Because upon further investigation, the Feds will discover that your friend Jody Palmer is also guilty. If I go down, she does too.”
My jaw went slack. “You’re lying.”
“Am I? Do you want to test me?” He quirked an eyebrow. “Why do you think she resigned?”
A chill traveled through my body. He was basically telling me I had no leverage. Oh my God…this wasn’t over yet. “Gage, don’t do this to me. I can’t take anymore.”
Something flickered in the depths of his eyes, something that gave me hope, but he dashed it with the words he whispered against my ear. “Doing the right thing isn’t in my nature. I want you.” He grabbed my ass and lifted, and his erection pushed against my opening.
Where I instantly throbbed for him.
“No!” I shoved him away. “Turn me in, if you want, but I can’t do this anymore.”
“You’d risk your daughter’s life?”
“No,” I choked out. “God, you’re despicable. The fact that you’d use her like this tells me everything I need to know about you.”
He frowned. “Maybe you don’t know me as well as you think.” He returned to his chair, which shocked the heck out of me. Deep down, I’d expected him to take me right there in his office.
“Then do the right thing. Let me go.”
“So you want me to let you out of our contract, but I’m supposed to keep paying for Eve’s medical bills?”
“Haven’t I paid enough? You’ve put me through hell and you know it.�
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“I’ll do it under one condition.”
His words stunned me, but then suspicion set in. “What do you want?”
The edge of his mouth turned up. “I already told you what I want.”
He wanted me. “Why, Gage? I don’t understand. You could have any woman you wanted.”
“Not any woman,” he said wryly.
And that was it. I was the forbidden fruit on the tree, though why he’d placed me into that category was unclear. If he’d approached me like a decent human being, I might have liked him. Now all he had going for him was my chemical reaction to him. It was just sex—really fantastic sex mixed with really horrific pain. “I’ll ask again, what do you want from me?”
“I want your trust.”
“Are you kidding me?”
He shook his head and stared at the scattered papers on his desk. “I’m a jealous man, Kayla. I don’t like sharing. But I admit that I went too far with you.”
“Is this the part where I tell you it’s okay?” I’d locked my anger away too long, and now it exploded in a rare display of fury. I stalked across the room and swiped the papers from his desk. Even his computer crashed to the floor, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. “I don’t like being raped, but that didn’t matter to you.”
He tensed, and for a moment I was sure he was going to explode. He stared at me for several long moments before speaking. “A part of you does like it, or you’d walk away right now.”
I opened my mouth but nothing came out.
“Eve is getting better,” he said. “I could stop paying for her care and she’d still recover.” He leaned forward. “So why are you still here, Kayla?”
My mouth hung open, a dozen replies forming on my tongue, but the truth gagged me.
I didn’t know why I was still there.
“Give me one more weekend. We’ll leave the contract behind.”
“And if I say no?”
He shrugged. “Well, if you’d rather carry out the rest of your six weeks, I guess I can punish you now for your blatant disobedience.”
I clenched my teeth. “One weekend, then I’m free?”
He nodded. “One weekend, and then you’re free.”
Chapter Five
Jody
Rain pelted my windows as I sat in my car, debating on whether or not to knock on Jody’s door, but I was here so I might as well get it over with. I reached for the door handle but snapped my hand back when two people emerged from her house. The sight of Rick speared through me, and I gripped the steering wheel as the fight or flight instinct kicked in. He grabbed her in a way that was too familiar; hands gripping her hair so she couldn’t move while he kissed her, his body trapping her between him and her front door. A passerby would see two people locked in a passionate embrace, but I saw it for what it was. Possession—the same kind Gage had wielded over me. He and Rick were made of the same cloth.
They finally broke apart, and the heat boiling in my stomach wasn’t born of jealousy. I pitied the poor woman who fell for Rick’s charm, for his crooked, boyish smile that was bright enough to disguise the viciousness lurking within him. No, it was hatred that set my blood afire; hatred for the man who’d taken my innocence and trust and had used them to shatter me. Flesh wounds heal—even the evidence of the beating Gage had issued would disappear—but the damage inflicted on the soul would last a lifetime.
Never taking my eyes off them, I dialed Ian’s number.
“Hi…” I said once he’d answered. “It’s me.”
His sigh came over the line. “I was so worried. Why’d you ignore my calls?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know.” Only I did. My confrontation with Gage still lingered, as did the questions he’d asked that I had no answers to. Rick finally broke away from Jody, and I sank down in my seat as he crossed the street to where a shiny BMW was parked. If that wasn’t evidence of Gage Channing’s money, I wasn’t sure what was.
“Are you okay?” Ian asked.
I hesitated, searching for an answer that wasn’t total BS. “Okay” was difficult to define. “Yeah…I’m at Jody’s. Gage said she’s also responsible for the embezzlement.”
“Jesus, Kayla. You can’t trust anything he says.”
“I know, but Rick just left her house, so something is definitely up. I’m gonna talk to her.” I waited until the BMW disappeared around the corner before opening my door.
“I called the PI. He didn’t find anything else.” His frustration was obvious.
“Thanks for trying. I’ll call you after I talk to her.” I ended the call as I darted across the street, keeping my head ducked low against the rain. And then I found myself facing her much too soon. I opened my mouth, but no words came out.
“Kayla? What are you doing here?”
“I need to talk to you.”
She stepped back and opened the door wide. “Come in.”
“Thanks.” I stepped inside, and I didn’t miss the worried glance she sent down the street as she closed the door. I’d met her shortly after my wedding, and at one time we’d been close. Now there was a huge divide between us, only I hadn’t realized how far apart we’d drifted until now. I hadn’t realized the divide was Rick himself. There was no point in beating around the bush. “I saw you with Rick.”
She swallowed hard, and her attention landed on anything other than me; the plush burgundy runner on the floor, the large poinsettia plant on the hutch in the foyer, even her own reflection in the oversized mirror. “I don’t know what to say…”
“Why don’t you start with the truth? Why is Rick blackmailing Gage?”
Her gaze jerked to mine. “What are you talking about?”
“Don’t play dumb. I know about the embezzlement. Gage told me you were involved.” I still wasn’t sure if I believed him, but I had nothing else to go on.
She crossed her arms. “Gage Channing is crazy. You can’t trust anything he tells you.”
“How about his financial records? Should I trust those? The evidence doesn’t lie, Jody. Money went into Rick’s account, and it coincides with Gage’s statements.” I wondered how long her affair with Rick had been going on. Had she been sleeping with him while he’d been married to me? “Since I just saw Rick leave here, I’m going to assume Gage was telling the truth.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Look, I know this must be a shock to find out about Rick and me this way, but—”
“It’s more than a shock—it’s crazy! Jody, do you have any idea what he’s capable of?”
She pursed her lips. “It’s been three years. I thought you’d be over him by now.”
I was sure my eyes bulged. “You think I’m still hung up on the man who beat the shit out of me?” I took a step toward her. “How long has this been going on? Has he hit you yet?”
Jody shuffled back and wrapped her arms around herself. “He’s changed. He never meant to hurt you.”
I arched my brows. “Really?”
“He told me what happened. You don’t have to be ashamed—a lot of women suffer from postpartum depression and do things they regret.”
I stared at her, incredulous. “This should be good. Please, enlighten me—what bullshit did he feed you?”
“It’s in the past.” She shook her head. “I know you’d never try to hurt yourself or your daughter under normal circumstances, and obviously you got the help you needed—”
“Obviously,” I snapped, folding my arms. “I can’t believe you’re buying into his lies.”
“He wouldn’t lie to me. He loves me.”
I almost snorted. “Rick doesn’t love anyone.”
“He loves me, and he loves Eve. You can’t keep him from her forever. He already lost a year and half in prison.”
I blinked, struggling to form a reply to such a crazy statement. “He should have been locked away a lot longer for what he did to me.” His expensive attorney had gotten him a lenient plea bargain, otherwise he’d still be in jail, and I�
��d still be safe from the threat of him. “How long has it been going on?” I asked.
She studied the purple nail polish on her toes. “Since before you guys split. I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you, Kayla.”
“You’re going to be the sorry one. Rick is rotten underneath his appeal.” I headed toward the door and opened it. “Tell him if he comes anywhere near Eve, I’ll have him thrown in jail again.”
Her expression iced over. “It’s not fair to keep him from her. He just wants to be part of her life—we both do.”
“Over my dead body.” I slammed the door behind me, and Ian called before I reached my car. He started talking the instant I answered.
“I’m going on my lunch break now. Can I come over? I need to see you.”
“I need time, Ian.” I slid in behind the wheel and slumped in my seat. Letting him past my defenses that morning had been a mistake.
“Why do you keep shutting me out?”
“I don’t want to shut you out, but…”
“But what?”
I’m ashamed.
“I’ve got some stuff to sort out. I’m sorry.” I hung up, shut off my phone, and headed to the hospital to spend the rest of my day with Eve. And I prayed to God Ian would stick to the wing he worked in.
Chapter Six
Christmas
Eve’s doctor gave me the best Christmas present I could’ve hoped for. My baby was coming home in two weeks.
I must have cried happy tears for an hour straight, and thankfully Eve was too preoccupied with opening her gifts and visiting with Santa to notice that her mother was a basket case. Only this time I was a basket case in the best sense of the word; I hadn’t been this happy in months.
