by Jenika Snow
“It doesn’t bother me. Daniella behaved well,” Demon said, clearly rubbing it in.
“Yes, well, I’ve not exactly been the best father to her. I’m sure she blames me for everything that has gone wrong in her life, including her whore of a mother.”
“You’re married?” Joker asked.
Amy tightened her hold on his hand when Zeke turned to look at him.
“Yes, I was married for a very, very short time. Make no mistake, I love my daughter, and I don’t want anything to happen to her. Children, they can be your greatest joy and your greatest pain… I have to go.” Seconds later, Zeke left the clubhouse with his bodyguards trailing behind him.
“Well, I have to say, he kind of goes up in my estimation,” Steel said, standing away from the bar.
“Why is that?” Demon asked.
“Some fathers would have slapped her silly for the way she talked to him. He may be a bastard to us, but he does love his daughter.”
Joker couldn’t argue with that.
Several days later, Amy sat inside her office thinking about Joker. She’d spent the entire weekend with him at the clubhouse. He’d wanted to show off his room, and the place he called home more often than not. She’d loved every second of being in the clubhouse. What she didn’t like was being surrounded by all the sex that went on. She’d gone to the kitchen while Joker was in the shower and there, she found a couple fucking on the kitchen table. She didn’t know what the hell to do, turn away or get the soda she’d been after. Deanna had come down, rolled her eyes, and told her to get what she wanted. “No one stops for anything or anyone here.”
After that, Amy was very nervous about who she approached.
Tapping her lip with a finger, she scrolled through the website to make sure everything was up to date on the company’s property. Frances and Son’s was booming at the moment, but with the recent pitfalls with the recession, everyone was on tenterhooks to see where everything would land.
In her two years with the company, they had seen the ups and downs of the market.
“Hey, stranger, it’s good to see you back with us,” Michael said.
After her last appointment with Gregory, her therapist, she’d taken some leave. Among all the things she had worked through with him, she still needed to deal with the issues surrounding the loss of her mother.
“Thanks, it’s good to be back.”
“I’m really sorry about your mom.”
“Me, too.” She offered him a smile even as tears welled up in her eyes. No matter how much time had passed, the loss of her mother was still hard for her to bear. There were times she’d wake up, sure she heard her.
Joker’s arms around her kept her safe and grounded.
“So, I was wondering, do you think I could buy you a drink after work?” he asked.
Opening her mouth, Amy was shocked. Michael had always been a nice guy, attentive, but friendly.
“Uhm, I don’t think that’s a good idea. My boyfriend is picking me up after work.” Calling Joker her boyfriend still gave her a thrill.
Michael held his hands up. “No need to say more. You’re taken. I should have known.” He stepped away.
Amy smiled, watching him retreat. When he turned his back, she went back to the screen again. The house she was currently looking at was one that had been booked to show that afternoon. Scribbling the address down, she finished up her early duties before heading out.
Driving to the location, she saw the house was luxurious from the designed garden to the private gate. She used her realtor’s key code to enter.
Waiting in the car, she saw the vehicle enter the property ten minutes later. Amy tensed up, recognizing the car, and the guy who stepped out of the vehicle: Zeke. From the other side of the car, she saw Daniella climb out. Her palms sweaty, Amy forced herself to leave her vehicle.
“Hello,” she said.
“You’re Joker’s old lady.”
“Yes, I saw you at the clubhouse Saturday.” Amy held her hand out to Zeke then to Daniella. The younger girl looked shocked to be acknowledged. “Shall we?”
For the next hour, Amy showed Zeke around the house. She noticed Daniella walked a few steps behind her father, never getting too close to him. There was a lot of damage between the two and it broke her heart to see it. Zeke was a bad guy, and Joker had warned her about how dangerous Zeke was, but he loved his daughter. When the tour was finished, Amy turned to them. “What do you think?”
Zeke looked at Daniella. “What do you think, sweetheart?”
“Why are you asking me?”
“I’m buying this for you and me.”
“What?”
“You heard me. I’m tired of this fight between us. This house, it’s going to be ours but if you don’t like it, tell me what you do like, and I’ll have Amy look into it.”
He was a good father. Amy knew the difference between a good one and a bad one.
“I could find something more to your taste,” Amy said, smiling between the two.
“I like it. This is the one,” Daniella said.
“Amy, you’ve just sold yourself a house.”
Smiling, Amy went through the necessary paperwork to start the process of buying a house. By the time she made it back to her office, it was past lunch. For the next couple of hours, she took down appointments, and showed another couple a property. At five, she was exhausted and ready to call it a day.
Joker met her at work.
“I came here in my car,” she said, wrapping her arms around him.
He held onto her ass, rubbing his cock against her.
“Go and get your car. I’ll follow you back. We’re going to your place. I think we should give Dad some space.”
She nodded, leaving him to grab her car.
The drive back to her small apartment made her feel lonely. It reminded her that her mother was gone and it didn’t matter how much she tried, she was never coming back. She hated being lonely more than anything.
Joker was right behind her when she parked her car in the parking lot. He gripped the back of her neck, pressing a kiss to her lips.
“You won’t believe what happened to me today,” she said, opening her apartment door.
“What?”
“I showed Zeke a new house today. It’s a good one, expensive, and nice.”
“Zeke bought a house?” She saw the tension in her man. Running her hands up his chest, she tried her best to ease his worry.
“Don’t fret. He was nice. I think he’s just trying to make a go of it with his daughter. He’s trying to break down some of her walls that keep him locked out.”
“I don’t like it.”
“It’s work, and I made one hell of a commission off him today by selling it.”
“Well, if you’re getting money out of it, I say take it.”
He kissed her, biting on her bottom lip.
“I missed you today,” she said, resting her head against his chest.
“Missed you too, baby.”
That moment, her stomach started to protest that she hadn’t eaten.
“Go and cook us something to eat.”
“Okay.” She kissed him again on the lips before walking into the kitchen.
“You’ve got a couple of messages on your machine. Do you want me to press play?” he asked.
“Sure.”
The first message was from over a week ago. She hadn’t been back to her apartment in over a week, preferring to spend time with David.
After three messages, Amy paused at Gregory’s voice.
“Hello, Amy, this is Gregory. You’ve missed your last two sessions. Please, give me a call so we can arrange for your next appointment. You’re aware how important these are. Thank you.”
“Gregory’s your therapist,” Joker asked, leaning against the fridge.
“Yes.”
“Why have you missed your last appointments with him?”
“I didn’t think I needed them. I’ve been do
ing better. Much better.”
“Amy, you can’t stop going now.”
“But I’m doing so well. We’re together, and I feel happy.”
Joker closed the distance between them, cupping her face. “Look at me, baby.”
She looked up at him.
“I love you. I love you with all my heart and soul. When I decideded to take the next step with you, I did it, knowing you were not completely fixed here.” He pressed fingers to her head. “And here,” he pressed his hand to her chest, right over her heart.
“What?”
“What that man did to you, it’s a miracle you’re able to be with me.” Joker pressed a kiss to her lips. “Those appointments are important to you. I love you and that’s never, ever going to change.”
“But I feel fine.”
“Now, you feel fine now. That could change in a couple of weeks. Don’t stop going, Amy. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”
“You still want me to go?”
“Yes.”
Nodding, Amy shrugged. “Then I guess I should go.”
“Good, now feed me woman.”
“I’m pleased you decided to come back and see me, Amy,” Gregory said.
She took a seat in the chair across from him. Her hands were sweaty and a big part of her didn’t want to be there. It reminded her of why she’d had to see Gregory in the first place. Joker had taken care of her father. She was never going to see him again, and that made her fixed.
“I see you don’t want to be here.”
“I just don’t feel I need this anymore.”
Gregory removed his reading glasses to look at her. He only ever used them to look at the chart he was writing on.
“And why do you think that?” he asked.
“I don’t have nightmares anymore. I’m sleeping through the night, too. I’m in a committed relationship. I’m growing up.”
“Amy, being here isn’t about being a grownup. You’ve had to grow up faster than a lot of women your age. This is about talking and dealing with the problems that you’ve faced.” Gregory tilted his head to the side. “You’re in a relationship?”
“Yes, Jo-Reese, my… friend.” Her cheeks heated thinking how gross it would sound if she said step-brother.
“I know who Reese is. I’m not here to judge you, Amy. I’m here to help you so that you can overcome some of your anxieties and fears.”
“I’m doing much better.”
“And I want you to continue with that progress, Amy. This room, I don’t judge you here. You talk freely about everything going on in your life. It hasn’t been long since you lost your mother, and a new relationship can add to the stress.”
Amy rubbed at her temple, wishing she could express more clearly how much she didn’t want to be here.
“I can see you’re still not happy being here.”
“I just—I want to be with Reese. His name’s Joker. He’s part of a club. I love him, Gregory. I love him with my whole heart and I want to be everything he needs and loves.”
“I imagine Reese loves you very much. Is he aware of your past?”
“Yes.”
“How would you feel if I invited Reese in to talk with me?” Gregory asked.
“Wait, what?”
“I’d like to get to know him a little better. I want to help you, Amy. Your mother, she cared about you very much.”
“I don’t think that’s—”
“You’re nervous about this aspect of your life. In order to build a successful relationship, you must be willing to open yourself up. Reese needs to know how important it is.”
“He does.”
“Would you object to me talking with Reese?”
The more she thought about it the more she decided her protests were silly. “No, I don’t think he’d have a problem.”
“Excellent. I was thinking on your Thursday appointment. I’d like the opportunity to talk with him separately and then with you.”
“I don’t like this,” she said. Over the years she’d come to trust Gregory so that she could just say exactly what she was thinking and feeling.
Gregory put his glasses back on. “You’ve got nothing to be afraid of. I’m more concerned about your absence the past couple of sessions. From the look of you, I can see you’re doing great. This is one of the reasons I want to see Joker. I’ve never seen you looking this happy before, Amy. In all the years I’ve known you, you’ve never once entered this room with a smile on your face or your eyes twinkling. The change within you… it’s beyond my comprehension. I’m a doctor and I like to see my patients are well taken care of. Brenda, she was a friend of mine as well as a client. I’m here for you,” he said.
“Thank you, Gregory.”
She was happy. Joker was finally in her life and for the first time ever, she felt safe.
Chapter 14
“Would you like me to call you Joker or Reese?” Gregory asked, and Amy glanced at Joker, feeling all kinds of nervous at this appointment. When she’d asked Joker to come with her to a therapy session, she didn’t know if he’d actually agree, although she’d hoped he would. But he had been so willing, especially when she told him she thought it would be good for them to get everything out. Although she was comfortable with where their lives were, and with where hers was going, she wanted to make sure she truly was healing. Amy wanted to know that Joker understood she might be okay on the outside, but there were times that she would struggle with her demons on the inside.
“I go by Joker.”
“Okay, then that’s how I’ll address you,” Gregory stated, and wrote something down in his notepad.
She stared at Joker, knowing he had to be semi-uncomfortable in this situation. She knew she had been her first appointment.
“Did Amy tell you why I asked you to attend a session?”
Joker nodded. “She thinks that I should come because of what she went through, and that you want me to understand how fragile she is.” She was surprised by his answer because she hadn’t been in-depth with him like that. But Joker was so smart and insightful, and nothing got by him.
“I wanted you here because I know you are aware of the past abuse she suffered at her father’s hands.” She noticed the way Joker curled his hands into fists.
“Yeah, I know all about that asshole, but he won’t be hurting Amy ever again.”
Gregory didn’t speak for a moment, just stared at Joker, and she worried that he’d pick up on the unsaid statement. Yeah, her man had done something horrible, so violent that it should have frightened her. She would never tell anyone that Joker had killed her father. He’d done it to protect her, to save her from her nightmares, and she loved him even more for that.
“I’d ask what you mean by that, or how you could guarantee that, but I don’t think you’d tell me, would you?”
Joker didn’t respond, just leaned forward and braced his elbows on his thighs. “You know the answer to that, Doc. But I want you to know that I would never hurt Amy. She’s my life, the woman I love, and I’d do anything to make sure she’s healed and whole. She knows what she means to me; that’s why I agreed to come here today. I want her to know that I support her all the way.”
Gregory nodded, made a low noise, as if agreeing with what Joker said, and jotted something down.
For the next forty-five minutes they talked about everything Amy had gone through, her progress, and Gregory let Amy and Joker speak together. It was a little awkward and embarrassing to have such a personal conversation with Joker in front of someone else even though she knew she had nothing to be embarrassed about. Maybe it was admitting all of this to Joker and Gregory, or maybe it was admitting it to herself?
The first step to healing was healing within; she knew that from her therapy and living her life. If she could accept that life sometimes wasn’t picturesque, even if it seemed like it, then she knew she’d be able to accept anything that was thrown her way.
They left Gregory’s office af
ter their hour session was up. They stood by the bank of elevators, neither speaking, with this weird vibe surrounding them. She looked at him, knew he was tense and uncomfortable, but he looked relaxed. Maybe she was the only one feeling that way? The elevators opened before she could say anything, Joker had his hand in hers and he pulled her into the elevator.
He wrapped his hand around the back of her neck, and with his other hand, pulled her closer, holding onto her as if his life depended on it. He used his body to press her even more firmly against the wall of the elevator. Amy was suffocating, but in the good way, in the kind of way that stole her breath and made her realize that life was precious.
Taking hold of the short hair at the base of his skull, she tugged lightly on the locks, trying to get him closer. She wanted to be ingrained in this man, let him take everything away so all she ever thought about was being with him. She pulled away, kept her eyes closed, and rested her forehead on his chest. “I love you so much, Joker.”
He stroked her back with his hand, and she heard him inhale deeply right by her ear. “And I fucking love you, baby.”
Leave it to her man to say it like it was.
“This is all real?” she murmured.
“I sure as hell hope so, Amy.” He pulled back, cupped her face, and leaned down to kiss her. “I know this seems so damn crazy, but this is so right.” He smiled at her, and she felt her heart rate pick up. “I am not going anywhere, and I won’t let you run. You’re stuck with me, baby girl, and that’s a damn fact.” He placed a hand on her chest, right over her heart. “Nothing else matters aside from what we feel in here, and baby, you own my heart.”
Two weeks later
The wind was chilly as the sun lowered behind the horizon, and Joker had never felt happier than he did right now. He was on his bike, riding free, with his woman behind him and holding on tight. He was doing something that he’d wanted to do for a long fucking time, but had never had the balls to follow through with. But because Amy was on the road to becoming healed, he knew this was the right step. She was doing so damn well, and he couldn’t be happier. The deeper they went into the woods, and the higher they ascended the mountain, the more the temperature dropped and the trees became thicker all around them. He wasn’t much of a nature person, didn’t give a fuck if he was surrounded by pavement or covered by trees. But for what he wanted to do he sought privacy, seclusion, and needed nothing artificial surrounding them.
