by Dixon, Ruby
She takes a forkful of eggs and nods. “I know, but I feel bad for you. I wish the perfume trick worked as well as it does on Emma. I don’t know why it doesn’t.”
“I just don’t have the right chemical make-up, I guess.” I shrug like it doesn’t matter, but it’s kind of heartbreaking. The perfume only works for me to a certain extent. My natural scent—which sounds embarrassing—quickly overpowers it and then I’m tossing pheromones into the air for every unmated dragon to come after. Since I’m unmated, I’m a danger to everyone I’m around, because it’s going to call all the male dragons to me. It’s why I have to hide in my room, away from any kinds of breezes.
I’m not allowed to go out in the open. I’m to be perfumed at all times. And I’m not allowed to masturbate, because the scent carries. It’s embarrassing to think about, but I remind myself that I’m safe here, and I’m with my sister, who loves me.
“It’s fine,” I say again, and eat a big mouthful of eggs. “This is really good this morning. Fresh eggs?”
Claudia nods, her expression thoughtful. “I can come and stay down with you, you know.”
“Don’t be silly,” I tell her, my tone gentle. “You’re pregnant. The last thing you need to do is sit in the dark and bake all day.” She looks unhappy at my words, toying with her breakfast, and I poke her gently with my fork. “Don’t worry over me. I’ve got that new book you gave me last week, and maybe I’ll fill up the kiddie pool and just soak for a while.” It’s set up in the bathroom so I can easily fill it up, and it does help when the day gets extra hot. It’s not great, but it’s better than nothing.
My sister brightens. “I got you one of those adult coloring book things. Found it at the bookstore. Markers, too. They’re dried out, but if you wet the tips I bet you can get some ink out of them.”
“You’re so thoughtful. Thank you.” I beam at her, because she really is trying.
Claudia smiles back, torn. “I really don’t mind, you know. I—” She pauses and the look on her face goes distant, as if she’s hearing a private conversation.
I know what’s happening—she’s talking to Kael, her dragon. Claudia told me they have a mental link that was created when they bonded, and it’s just another reason I’m envious of her. To have a mental link with the person you love? To never be further away than a thought? It sounds like heaven.
I finish the last bite of my food as I wait for my sister to finish her silent conversation. Claudia chuckles and shakes her head a few moments later, glancing over at me. “I’m sorry, what were we talking about?”
“Nothing important,” I promise, and it’s the truth. I know how any argument would go. She’d try her best to make me feel comfortable, but then I’d feel guilty and eventually I’d push her outside. She’s pregnant, after all. She needs to be out in the open air and taking in sunshine. All of that dark and heat can’t be good for anyone, even me.
A large shadow passes overhead in the sky, and my sister’s cheeks turn a rosy pink. There’s an excited flush on her face, and I suspect it’s from the private conversation she was having. She jumps to her feet, grabbing my plate before I can get rid of it. “Kael’s back.”
I nod and clasp my hands in my lap, sipping my coffee. It’s warm out and I don’t want anything hot to drink, but at the same time, coffee’s a luxury and it’s not to be wasted. Who knows when this will be my last? So I savor it despite the weather.
With a low rumble, almost like an oncoming storm, the dragon descends, and his wings flap like sails as he pulls them back against his body, tucking them close. He perches on the lip of the crumbling wall, gazing down at us with golden, whirling eyes. He’s all fearsome scales and claws, wings and tail, and bigger than just about anything I’ve ever seen. Maybe whale-sized, but everything in a zoo or aquarium’s long dead or escaped. His head’s the size of a small car and he looks so fierce and reptilian as he lifts a clawed foreleg and picks at long, fanged teeth that I wonder how Kael and my sister ever fell in love.
I glance over at my sister, and she’s in his shadow, gazing up at him, her arms crossed over the slight bulge of her pregnant belly. She’s got a look of pure adoration on her face, and it makes my heart squeeze to see her so very happy. I admit it, I’m jealous. How can I not be in the face of such joy? She’s pregnant and safe with a mate that loves her beyond anything.
And I…have a coloring book.
They’re utterly silent, conversing back and forth in a way I can’t hear. My sister tells me that Kael has the ability to speak English, but the only thing I’ve ever heard him utter is her name. A breath later, and then Kael’s in his human form, leaping down from the wall to the ground in front of Claudia.
I avert my eyes, because he’s naked, and since he’s technically my brother-in-law, I don’t really want to see all his bits and pieces. My sister whips out a towel and offers it to him, and he wraps it around his hips. Even like this, he’s stunningly handsome. There’s a hint of wildness to his demeanor as he moves to my sister’s side and caresses her cheek with claw-tipped fingers. His skin looks like golden scales, even though Claudia assures me it’s skin. He otherwise looks like a muscular, well-built humanoid man with a mass of thick golden hair and a crown of short, spiky horns at his temples. But when he looks over at me and his mouth pulls down a little in displeasure, his eyes flashing with a hint of black, he looks less human and more like a wild beast that just happens to have human form.
“Kael says he can smell you on the breeze today, Amy. I’m so sorry.” Claudia bites her lip. “He says it’s not safe to be up here.” She looks torn between her mate and me, glancing back and forth between us. “Maybe we can try some new perfumes.”
I know Kael deliberately leaves when I’m around because the perfumes hurt his nose. My poor sister. She’s trying to make all of us happy. “It’s fine,” I tell her brightly. “I’ll just go read my book. Please tell Kael thank you for me.”
She looks over at her dragon-man, silent, and then he nods slowly at me. I smile at both of them and gesture back toward my quarters. “I’ll head back. Thank you for breakfast, sis.”
“Of course. I’ll bring you lunch later,” she promises. “I’m experimenting with making bread and hopefully we can have sandwiches.” Her hand strokes over her belly again, her smile apologetic.
I give her an even bigger smile to let her know that I don’t blame her, and turn to head back to my room. My hated, hated room. I shuffle in that direction, trying not to make my steps too slow or else Claudia will worry. I open the door to my rooms, and the stale, hot darkness awaits me. I glance back at my sister before heading inside, and I see Kael is leaning over her, caressing her hair and nuzzling the side of her face. Claudia’s eyes are closed in what can only be described as sheer bliss, and one of his big hands is on her belly.
And that’s why she’s so happy. It’s not that he’s wild and dangerous. It’s not that he’s the baddest predator on the block. It’s that he’s so utterly devoted and in love with her. She’s the center of his universe. He’d do anything for Claudia, and the sun rises and sets in her eyes when it comes to him. And that’s what makes me so envious and lonely all at once.
I shut the door behind me and close myself into the stifling heat. I light a candle so it’s not completely dark, and I’ve got a book to read—Outlander. It’s very thick and the story’s intriguing…but I can’t concentrate on it. My mind is in other places today.
I did a very, very bad thing a few days ago.
I wait, though. I don’t want my sister coming in to my room. When I hear her laughter become throaty and distant, I move to the door to my rooms and listen. I can’t hear anything, which means they’ve probably retreated to their bedroom. They’ll probably be in there a while. I try not to think about that too much, and I throw the bolt on my door. If anyone asks, I’ll say I was sleeping naked.
That done, I head over to the far side of the room, where my stepladder is, and tug it to one corner. I noticed when I was dec
orating with scarves that the air ducts in this room were large enough to squeeze a person, and one day, when I was bored and restless and so miserable I could scream, I climbed into one to see where it led. I pull back the scarves and pry it open again today, then climb inside. My knee throbs a protest, but I ignore it. If I stopped every time my knee hurt, I’d never leave my bed. I clamber inside and wriggle my way forward, trying to keep the weight of my body off of my bad leg. The ductwork immediately turns and then goes around the outer wall of the building, and the next drop-off is several rooms over, in one of the old offices.
That’s where I’m heading. The grate’s missing there, because I took it off months ago. Claudia didn’t notice, because she never goes in this direction. She sticks to her small corner of the building itself. The rest of the building’s wrecked and useless, but this place has something I want.
It’s got a window.
I slide out of the duct and into the room. The floor creaks and feels a little mushy in certain spots, so I’m careful as I balance my weight, moving forward. There’s a sprawl of broken, upended desks in this old office, a couple of computers, and what looks like the remains of a copier. Useless junk in the After. No one’s got an office, no one’s doing paperwork, and no one’s computing. I move past them and head for the window.
It’s dusty and covered in grime and ash, but I can see out. And from here, I can see for miles and miles. There’s no breeze and it’s just as stifling in this room as it is in mine, but the view is breathtaking. I sit heavily in a chair with a few rollers missing and just admire the view.
And I think about the bad thing I did…
When we were helping my sister’s friend Emma and her dragon Zohr, they used me as a scent decoy to flush out Zohr’s enemy, an evil dragon-man named Azar. I don’t know all the details—Claudia keeps a lot of things from me to keep me safe. But it was one of the few chances I had to get out of my room and into the open. And…I dropped my panties into the bushes when no one was looking.
Panties are perfect, really, even if the thought of someone finding them makes me blush. They’re the garment that, ahem, gets the most of my scent, and they’re small and easy to hide. With my scent…another dragon can find me. An unmated one.
Then he can come and rescue me, like Rapunzel set free from her tower. He can love me like my sister’s mate loves her, and I’ll be safe and cherished. I’ll never have to spend another long day in this sweltering box of a room, wondering if I’m safe. I’ll have the same thing my sister has.
Here I am. Come and find me, I send out to the world, my hand resting on the window. If wishing and hoping could carry thoughts out into the world, mine would be a speeding bullet with all of the need I pour into them.
Surely there’s someone out there for me, a dragon just as lonely and in need of someone to love as I am.
2
RAST
I hold a tiny scrap of material wrapped around one claw as I fly over the human hive, searching for the one whose scent is on the faint pink material. The one whose scent holds me captive.
The faint, appealing smell has faded over time, but it does not matter. I have memorized it, and I would recognize it anywhere. The scrap itself does not matter, save that it is a reminder, even in my most crazed moments, that I have a goal. And so I carry it with me always. I do not know how long it has been since I found it. Three days? Thirty? Time is meaningless to my thoughts. The days run together in a haze of smoke and bloodlust.
It does not matter. I will not rest until I find her.
My mate.
The scent on the pink bit tells me many things about her, even if I do not know her face or her name. I know that she is young, she is fertile, and she is unmated. I know that she is not drakoni. And I know that she is untouched by another male, or I would scent his claim.
But there is nothing, and so I aim to be the one to claim her.
Just the thought of a mate is enough to focus my scattered thoughts, to bring me clarity after weeks, months, maybe even years of madness. Breathing in her scent provides me with direction, like a tunnel of clarity in the wild, bloodthirsty thoughts that crowd my mind. For a moment, a brief moment, I can remember who and what I am.
Then the scent fades and I am lost once more.
I do not give up, though. Between the push and pull of my mad thoughts, I remain focused on one goal—finding my mate. She is somewhere here, close to this human hive, and so I will pursue her until I can find her. Each day, I take to the skies, hunting for faint traces of her scent on the breeze. When there is nothing, I land on the ground and prowl over the grasses and rocky ruins of this place, trying to pick her lovely, light scent out from the myriad others that pepper the world.
She is here somewhere. I will find her.
I lift the scrap to my nose, breathing in deep once more. Then I lift my wings and fly higher, trying to catch the wind. Instinct tells me that I must check everywhere, and that includes breezes both low and high. I sweep along the ground when there is nothing high, and then when low provides nothing but the stink of the human hive, I take to the air once more.
Then, I find it. Just a trace, no more than a hint, but she is here. Somewhere.
I wheel about, plunging headlong into the wind, following her scent-trail. It is so slight that it is easily missed…except that I have her scent etched into my mind, surging through my blood. Even though it is faint, I can pick it up, and I follow it eagerly.
My mate—she is close.
I sweep through the skies, but no matter how hard I fly, it seems that her scent grows no closer, no stronger. The faint thread of it remains just that…faint. It is frustrating, but I will not give up.
Not when I have a hint that she is here. That she is as real as the air under my wings, and not just a figment of my tortured mind.
For days, I circle the same area. At least, it seems as if it is days. Time ebbs and blurs together. I eat little and sleep less, because I do not want to miss a chance of finding her scent. Endlessly, I pick through the scents in the air, looking for one hoped-for waft of my mate’s delicious aroma. When it trickles past again, I stop everything and fly to the nearest tall perch. There, I sit, and drink in her scent.
It is not alone, my mate’s aroma. It is accompanied by that of another female…a mated one. I can make out the rich notes of drakoni claiming in the second female’s scent. I am not interested in her, but it explains why my mate has been so elusive. As the smell of a drakoni male entwines with the second female’s scent, I realize that they are protecting my mate.
No…they are keeping her from me.
Anger simmers in the back of my mind, bubbling towards fury. That is why I cannot find her. They hide her away, ensuring that she is kept from me. I follow the scents, latching on to that of the mated female. It is stronger, easier to find on the breeze, and in a matter of hours, I locate their nest. It is a perch atop one of the tall, finger-like structures. As I approach, the male bugles a territory warning and I veer away.
For now.
If this is where the mated female is, mine will be close by. She will be waiting for me to claim her. I imagine her, claws curled, scales flashing red with mating need, imagine her lifting her gaze to mine in a challenge to enflame my loins and excite my soul.
But I cannot get to her if these others hide her away. I dare not attack a male protecting his territory and his female. I move to a nearby perch a short distance away and settle in, tucking my wings against my body and waiting. I will watch. I will pay attention to scents.
And when the time is right, I will attack and flush out my female, force her to take to the air and in battle-form. Once she does, then she is mine.
AMY
BOOM.
The sound wakes me from a deep sleep. I sit up in bed, disoriented. It’s hot in my room, my skin sticky with sweat, and at first I’m not entirely sure what happened. A bad dream, perhaps? I scrub a hand over my face and reach for a candle on the bedside. As I do,
I hear a trumpeting, angry sound that shakes the walls.
A dragon. Bugling.
My heart hammers in my throat and I squeeze back against the wall, forgetting all about a candle. I draw my good leg up against my body, as if it will somehow shield me from the onslaught. What’s going on? What’s Kael doing? I huddle in bed, my back to the wall, trying to make myself as small as possible. If Kael and Claudia are having a fight…but they never fight. I don’t understand.
A moment later, someone bangs on my door. “Amy! Amy, let me in!”
“Claudia?” I call out from the bed. “What’s going on?”
“Hurry and just let me in!” she calls out, sounding impatient and worried both. She bangs on the door again, and I can feel her impatience.
I get out of bed and rush over to the door, ignoring the shooting pain that moving so quickly is sending up my leg. I manage to get over there, fumble at the locks in the darkness, and my sister falls inside the moment the door opens. She’s got something long and dark in her hand—a shotgun.
What is going on?
“Is that a gun?” I whisper, breathless with shock. They don’t work against dragons. “Are you going to shoot Kael?”
“What? Never!” She pushes the door shut behind her. “I can’t believe you locked this. Don’t do that again. I nearly got nailed with one of those rocks he’s throwing down here.”
I fight back the wave of irritation I’m feeling at my sister’s comment. Just like that, she’s going to take away my right to privacy? What next? Me sleeping at the foot of their bed? I don’t say that, though—it’s clear she’s stressed out. “What’s going on?” I ask again.
“There’s a dragon out there,” she tells me, pulling me back from the door itself. We’re alone in the dark, and it’s deathly quiet for a long moment, the only sound that of our breathing.
And then the dragon trumpets again, a moment before another ear-shattering BOOM shocks through the room. The floors rattle with the force of it, and I gasp and cling to my sister for balance. Before I can speak, a second dragon adds an angry bugle to the mix, challenging the other.
