by Jamie Begley
She stared back at him, letting her guard down now that he wasn’t watching.
What did she have to lose?
Jo could answer that question with two words: her heart.
22
Rider watched Jo through his lashes, seeing the indecision on her face. Not moving a muscle, he let her walk blindly into the trap he had set for her. One good trap deserved another.
He believed her sudden outpouring of the night she had been raped had been deliberate. Trusting him as a friend had been planned to garner a protective attitude from him. Going along with her was his own plan of turning the sword back on her. Revenge was double-sided, and he didn’t like being anyone’s patsy, though Curt more than deserved being taken out.
He didn’t believe for one second that Jo wasn’t telling the truth about what had happened to her that night. And if she had come right out and asked him to kill Curt, he would have done it without hesitation. He still might if he could find a way without drawing attention to The Last Riders. Anyone who hurt a woman that way didn’t deserve second chances, and certainly after the tactics he had used to harass Jo.
However, he wanted to see how far she would go to convince him. It wouldn’t be the first time a woman had tried to manipulate him. Viper and Lucky had been the ones to warn him then, and he hadn’t listened. He would never ignore their warnings again. He had paid dearly for not listening then.
He was about to raise his eyes when he spotted her inching closer. Closing his lids tighter, he listened for her movements, holding his breath.
The moment her lips brushed his, Rider had to hold back a groan. Like a perfume that never smelled the same way on another woman, no two women kissed the same.
Her lips quivered against his. They tasted like salty tears and fear.
His dented pride that she had been lying to him about his car, and why she was letting him ride along with her was sucked out of him when she then trustingly laid her hands on his chest and pressed her lips more firmly against his.
A woman could lie with words, deeds, and her eyes, but they couldn’t lie with their kisses. At least, Jo couldn’t. She wasn’t pretending the fear, nor was she pretending the small spark of response she felt at their kiss.
Rider let his lips part slightly, giving her the option to further the kiss, waiting for her to retreat. With iron-filled determination, he kept his cock from rising when he felt her tongue entering his mouth, rubbing along the inner skin of his bottom lip. Opening his mouth wider, he touched his to hers, enticing Jo farther inside.
The sound of a cell phone had them both opening their eyes.
“It’s yours,” Jo said, scooting away and reaching for the Barbie. She began wrapping it as he answered his phone.
“Lily went into labor.” Knox’s voice had Rider getting to his feet immediately.
“On my way.” Rider grabbed his jacket, shrugging it on as he returned to Jo. Hunkering down, he lifted Jo’s embarrassed face to his. “I have to go. Lily’s in labor.” Without giving her time to protest, he pressed a firm kiss to her lips. “We’ll pick this up another—”
“There’s nothing to say. I proved my point.”
“You did? I must have missed that. It felt very sexual to me.”
“It didn’t.”
Rider pressed a finger to her lips. “Don’t lie. It’s very unbecoming, especially when we both know it isn’t true.”
“I don’t know …”
Rider dropped his hand, brushing his knuckles against her nipples and perking them up even more until they were blatantly thrusting out at him.
Jo turned her face stubbornly away from him. “I thought you were in a hurry.”
“I am. I’m just not going to let you lie to yourself about what just happened, even if it makes you feel better.”
“A gentleman wouldn’t gloat.”
“Sweetheart, I’m no gentleman.” Giving her another kiss, he rose, then strode across the room. Opening the door, he saw Rachel and Cash coming from a room farther down the hall, their expressions just as intense as his.
“You can ride with us. Willa called and said she and Lucky already left. They wanted to make sure you had a ride.”
“How long has she been in labor?” Rider asked as they hurried outside and piled into Cash’s truck.
“You know as much as we do,” Rachel said, holding on to the dashboard as Cash peeled out of the parking lot.
As they drove to the hospital, headlights glowed behind them. From the side-view mirror, Rider could see motorcycles making their way to the same place.
Moon, Trip, and Gavin were getting off their bikes as Rider, Cash, and Rachel were getting out of the truck. Rider was surprised to see Gavin there. He preferred being alone during the day and would ride alone during the night, despite every attempt he and the other brothers made to include him, or tried to ride with him.
Rider fell into step with him as they went through the sliding glass door and down the hallway to where Willa had texted Rachel they would be.
“Where’s Shade?” Rider asked Viper when Gavin sat down next to him.
“In Lily’s room with her.”
“That won’t last long.” Rider sat down next to Gavin, forcing his presence, though he could tell Gavin wished he had picked another place to sit. “Shade doesn’t do well with Lily in any type of pain.” Stretching his legs out, he waited for the fireworks to begin.
It only took two minutes before the elderly doctor came into the waiting room.
“Viper, may I speak to you privately?”
Rider grinned when Dr. Matthews lifted a handkerchief out of his pocket to mop up his sweaty forehead.
“Here we go.” Rider used his elbow on Gavin as Viper left with the doctor.
“Something could be wrong.” Gavin shifted away, out of reach of his elbow.
“If something were wrong, we would know. Shade goes apeshit over Lily.”
“You exaggerate.”
“Think so? Cash, Gavin thinks I’m exaggerating about Shade going apeshit over Lily when something goes wrong.”
Cash hooked an arm around Rachel’s shoulders, leading her to Viper’s empty chair. Sitting down, Cash tugged Rachel down onto his lap. The waiting room was filled to capacity with The Last Riders.
“An ape would have more common sense.” Cash grinned. “He’s more like a psycho on steroids. Isn’t that right, Vixen?”
Rider could sympathize with Cash’s wife as she could only sit and stare at Gavin. He was a fearsome sight with his new haircut and tattoo.
“I should go call Holly and ask if she and Greer can spend the rest of the night with Mag and Ema.” Excusing herself, Rachel moved away to the farthest edge of the room.
“I don’t think Rachel likes your new haircut,” Rider teased his friend.
When Gavin stood up and strode out of the room, Rider watched him leave with a heavy heart. At one time, he and Gavin had been closer than he had been to Viper. They had become friends the first day of basic training. It had even been their idea to start The Last Riders.
He could sit there and let Gavin have time to heal, but since getting to know Jo better, he realized that old wounds didn’t heal themselves. They just made them more dangerous.
Rider watched as Gavin walked down the hall then went into a room to the side.
Walking down the hall himself, he was about to go into the room when he saw Stud, Calder, and their wives coming from around the corner. Calder stopped to talk to him as the others hurried into the waiting room.
Rider’s eyes went to the side, watching Gavin get a drink then sit alone by the window. About to say a quick hi, he was determined not to let Gavin be by himself.
Calder’s eyes also went to the side, seeing Gavin. Then he turned back to him.
Rider expected him to go inside and talk to Gavin, but he was surprised when Calder took his arm, leading him back toward the waiting room.
Rider jerked his arm away, stopping. “I was going to talk to
Gavin.”
“Gavin doesn’t want to talk right now. He wants to be left alone.”
Rider liked Stud’s brother, but he was man enough to admit to himself that he was also jealous of him. He had the relationship now with Gavin that he had once had. He had been trying to break through the sheet of ice Gavin had placed between them without any success.
“He stays locked up in his room most of the day. He rides alone. The only time he talks to one of us is when he’s working out.” Rider raised his voice deliberately, wanting Gavin to hear his frustration. “I want—”
“What you want and what Gavin needs are two different things.” Calder kept his voice low and steady.
“Memphis betrayed him; the rest of us didn’t.”
“Gavin knows that. That’s why he’s still here.”
“Then why the silent treatment?” Rider dug his heels in when Calder’s jaw tautened, and he motioned him to go into the waiting room. He wasn’t going anywhere until he had it out with Gavin. If he blamed him for not being there when Memphis had kidnapped him, he would readily accept the blame. He deserved it. He had let Gavin down.
“It’s not about you, Rider. It’s about Gavin.” Calder raked his hand through his hair. Moving to the side, he then braced his back against the wall. “You’re trying to re-connect with a man who doesn’t exist anymore.”
Rider felt as if Calder was chipping away at his heart with an ice pick. He hadn’t believed he had enough of his heart left to hurt anymore. Calder was proving him wrong.
“You know what makes Gavin tick? He lost years of his life and the woman he loved. Only two things kept Gavin strong. One was his fiancée, and the other was The Last Riders.”
“We’re here.” Rider clenched his fist, then hit himself on his chest.
“Are you? Gavin hasn’t left. He’s staying at the club.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“I’m not trying to tell you anything. I can’t. I’m Gavin’s sponsor.” Calder stared meaningfully into his eyes. “You served in the military with Gavin, didn’t you?”
“Yes. Why?”
“Viper said that Gavin was highly decorated. That true?”
Disconcerted by what he felt Calder was trying to tell him, he answered, “Yes.”
“It takes a special kind of man to become decorated.”
“Yes. Gavin did the Navy proud.”
“I imagine Viper and Ton were proud of him, too.”
“Gavin lived to make Viper proud. It’s why he went into the military. Gavin hero-worshiped his big brother. It’s why he wanted to expand the factory. He wanted to prove that The Last Riders weren’t just a motorcycle club, but that they could make a difference in people’s lives. That’s why he chose Treepoint. It was economically depressed. When Shade’s father told him about the people here, he wanted to help.”
“That’s the kind of man he is.” Calder nodded, his eyes delving into his.
Rider stared back. Calder was trying to tell him something without revealing any of Gavin’s secrets.
Rider emotionally stepped back, thinking about his friend logically.
Gavin hadn’t interacted with The Last Riders since his return, maintaining his distance from the brothers and the women, with two exceptions: Knox and Diamond. Why would he make an exception for them and not Viper or him? He and Train had been closest to Gavin before his kidnapping. What made Knox and Diamond special now?
Taking into account what made Gavin tick, what Calder was trying to tell him finally clicked.
He reached out to the wall to steady himself, closing his eyes as a burning agony seared his soul so deeply he couldn’t catch his breath. Only one time in his life had he experienced a pain so excruciating that it cut him off at the knees.
He had to talk to Knox.
Gathering his strength, he started for the waiting room to find the man, when Calder caught his arm again.
Jerking away, he nearly punched him to make him let go.
“Later, Rider. Tonight’s not the night. Tonight is for the joy of birth, not reliving old nightmares.”
Rider nodded.
This time when he made to go into the waiting room, Calder let him.
Finding a seat, he started thinking, racking his mind as to what could be so bad that Gavin felt unable to talk to him and Viper. He was still sitting there when the sun began to shine through the blinds and Shade came out to tell them that he had another son and that Lily was fine.
Rider stayed apart as the brothers and women came forward to congratulate him. Gavin stood stoically to the side, watching Shade for the same reason.
It wasn’t often that Shade let his emotions shine through. As unemotional as Shade was, he was a good father and husband. His small family was his weakness, but it was also his strength. His family made him human and not the assassin the military had trained him to be.
Shade’s harsh features were softened with a love that shined brighter than the sun outside. He had weathered many storms with Lily and would inevitably weather many more, but the constant that would see that their marriage would survive was love.
It was something Rider had forgotten how to do or believed himself incapable of doing again. Shade hadn’t given up, hadn’t retreated. It had been possible for him because, from the second he had seen Lily, he had fallen in love with her.
Gavin stood alone, surrounded by people who loved and cared for him, just as Jo did.
Jo ran around town, helping anyone who needed her, yet she kept herself separated, using her truck as a barrier from taking part in their lives, handing out small parts of herself to keep herself from being hurt again.
Gavin and Jo had been victims, both unable to see past their private horrors. They couldn’t take the one constant that could free them from their nightmares.
Rider was given his nickname in the military because he didn’t stop. He would ride through a shitstorm to complete a mission. He could take on Gavin, who he loved like a brother, and Jo, who, while he didn’t love her, could give him the future he wanted. It just depended on if he wanted to.
It wasn’t a question where Gavin was concerned. With Jo, it was.
Standing, he went to the cord to raise the blinds. Looking out, he saw Jo’s tow truck drive into the parking lot. Curious, he watched as she stopped and got out of the truck. Then she went to the passenger door, opened it, and reached up, holding her arms out for the small boy who jumped into them. Grinning, she set him down as Sasha climbed out. Sasha then took Shade’s son before going toward the hospital entrance.
Rider narrowed his eyes as Jo took one step toward the hospital, then stopped. The myriad of expressions on her face were easy to interpret as she argued with herself over whether she should go inside or not. It was clear she wanted to, but instead of doing what she wanted, she got back in her truck and drove off.
It was the yearning on Jo’s face that made his decision for him where she was concerned. It was the same yearning he felt every time he was with Shade and Lily, or the other married brothers. It was why he would steal time away with the wives when their husbands were gone.
The yearning of one day having that slice of heaven for himself.
Raising the blinds, he let the sun pour into the room. It wasn’t the only thing he allowed inside. Calder had been right the previous night. This time was about birth, and with birth came hope.
Rider felt the first flickers of hope that he hadn’t experienced in a long time. If he was lucky, maybe he would be able to make a start in healing. Not only with Gavin and Jo, but find a small piece for himself.
23
Jo snuggled under her blanket, trying to get warm. Lying sideways on her couch, she was too tired to get up and turn her space heater up higher. She rested her head listlessly on the arm of the sofa, trying to stop shivering. She should have just stayed in her truck. It would have been easier to keep warm.
She had spent Christmas Eve towing cars that wrecked, thanks to the sudden sn
owstorm that the forecasters had said would miss them. She had stayed out on the roads until the wrecks had been cleared.
Fighting exhaustion until the snow had stopped, with the beginning of the flu, she had come home, determined to get a few hours’ sleep before she was called out again. Hopefully, everyone had gotten to where they were going and stayed there until the weather cleared.
Shivering harder, she started to cough. Her full bladder had her braving the cold room, moving out from her cocoon.
Swaying, she had to rest her hand on the back of the couch as a spasm of coughing overtook her.
Placing the back of her hand to her forehead, she felt the heated warmth of a high temperature.
Finally, she gained momentum to make it to the bathroom.
Turning on the bathroom heater, she took a shower, trying to lower her fever. Getting out, she put on her favorite flannel pajamas and her mother’s old robe.
In her bedroom, she found a thick pair of socks, and a thicker blanket and a pillow.
She flipped her space heater on high and curled back down on the couch, tucking the blanket close to her face, she sniffled into it, feeling miserable.
She wondered what Rider was doing. After the night she had kissed him, he had been trying repeatedly to invite himself on her tow runs. That had been over a month ago. However, she had refused his offers, as well as the many invitations that Rachel and Winter had issued.
The hardest invitation she had refused was from Lily, who had wanted her to come for dinner to meet her new baby, who they had named Clint. The adorable baby in the pictures that Lily had texted her had her aching to hold him.
“Clint looks just like Shade and John. Please come, Jo.”
Jo had made the excuse that she wasn’t feeling up to the weather and didn’t want to expose the baby to her germs. God was punishing her for lying.
Her sniffles and another round of coughing had her sitting up and reaching for the cough syrup that was as old as she was. Shaking it, she saw that the black goo was so thick she could see clumps dancing inside it. She would rather take the coughing than drink that. Besides, it was probably a cold. She would feel much better after she got some sleep.
