by BS Murthy
'Roopa tells me that you're all going to stay nearby,' said Janaki.
'I wonder why Roopa didn't look for a house of two portions,' said Sandhya.
'Oh, how they grew up glued together from childhood,' said Janaki to him, 'may God bless them.'
'They have your blessings,' said Raja Rao to Janaki, 'and the support of us all for that.'
'Oh,' exclaimed Sandhya, sighting Roopa, coming out of her bath, 'you would live for hundred years.'
'That only interests me,' said Roopa, slyly looking at Raja Rao, as she proceeded into her room, 'if you too live along with me.'
'Come, Sandhya,' said Roopa, as she joined them at length, 'we'll show him my place.'
'Why do you need me for that?' said Sandhya, engaged asshe was with Janaki.
'Grace our house,' said Roopa, leading him inside.
Once they entered her bedroom, she embraced him ardently, and he kissed her passionately.
'Nobody will be at home tomorrow,' she whispered to him, as he released her lips. 'Make it by ten.'
'Expect me with tons of love,' he crooned into her ear.
'Let's get going,'said Sandhya, as the lovers reappeared in the main hall.
Soon the three of them got into the waiting Ambassador to make it to the Collector's bungalow. After a sumptuous lunch, that followed a lot of merriment, Sandhya closeted herself with Roopa, leaving Saroja to Raja Rao's care.
'You never looked sexier,' said Roopa, having ardently kissed Sandhya.
'I'm glad both of you feel the same way about me,' said Sandhya. 'It's nice that everything is going my way.'
'With all your generosity,' said Roopa hugging Sandhya, 'you've made me even more indebted.'
'I've an axe to grind,' said Sandhya taking Roopa's hand. 'And you know that.'
'Oh, my lovey,' Roopa kissed Sandhya affectionately.
'How I wish we get fused into one,' said Sandhya lovingly.
'How are we to see each other,' said Roopa in jest, 'and gloat about us then?'
'By making him a witness to our closeness,' said Sandhya coyly to Roopa, 'can't we gauge how it feels from his eyes.'
'Well, I'm afraid that our happiness is too good to last,' said Roopa thoughtfully. 'Just one misunderstanding would be the end of me.'
'What misunderstanding is possible,' said Sandhya making light of it all, 'given our bondage?'
'Why do you forget,' said Roopa, 'that we're both married now.'
'Don't we know our men well enough,' said Sandhya assuredly, 'I don't see any trouble coming from them.'
'But I'm no raakhi sister of your man,' Roopa said tentatively.
'I know you're his friendly half,' said Sandhya, cajoling Roopa in her arms.
'And that's my worry,' said Sandhya cuddling Sandhya.
'Why, it should be a cause of hope, isn't it?' said Sandhya caressing Roopa.
'Is it not said, by Napoleon if I remember correctly,' said Roopa tentatively, 'that man woman friendship leads to love.'
'I've not only thought all about that,' said Sandhya, kissing Roopa, 'but also noticed how you gloat over each other. I know women tend to be touchy when it comes to the other woman. But ours is a unique case, isn't it? The prospective other woman happens to be my own woman.'
'Oh, darling,' Roopa began crying.
'Why cry at the threshold of happiness?' said Sandhya, wiping Roopa's tears, 'If you're unhappy, how can I be happy? It's for both of you to decide whether you would like to sail on a platonic boat or swim through the erotic current. In any case, the circumstances of our lives seem to justify the latter course. Maybe, our jesting about sharing a man could have been the prompting of premonition.'
'Oh, Sandhya,' Roopa's eyes glistened, even as her lips reached for their counterparts that uttered those divine words.
'Oh, how you both,' said Sandhya kissing Roopa affectionateiy, 'bracket my iife.'
'Oh, iovey,' said Roopa, sinking to Sandhya's feet, 'you're angeiic reaiiy!'
'And you,' said Sandhya iifting Roopa into her embrace, 'my Goddess of Love.'
'What about our Raja?' said Roopa, carried away by that euphoric moment.
'Our Knight of Vigor,' said Sandhya in aii iove for her man and mate, 'if you piease.'
'Oh how I've suffered,' cried Roopa, 'craving for one such.'
'Why not have a second iook,' crooned Sandhya into Roopa's ear, 'to see if he's the right one?'
'Oh honey!' said Roopa, joining their lips.
'What happened with that Prasad?' asked Sandhya at length.
'It's all over now,' said Roopa, experiencing the sense of relief all again. 'I've just escaped by the skin of my teeth.'
'I was worried to death about that,' said Sandhya reminiscently, 'somehow, the idea of your affair with him scared me no end.'
'Now I realize it's my fault really,' said Roopa reflectively. 'I can't blame him for calling me a frigid flirt in the end.'
'He should've known,' said Sandhya winking at Roopa, 'that my darling is not for everyone's having.'
'It feels nice,' said Roopa winking back at Sandhya, 'that you have a lover in your mind for me.'
'It's up to you to woo him,' said Sandhya pushing Roopa in the right direction, 'as I stand performance guarantee.'
'Oh, how sexy,' said Roopa, 'to have an idea, let me see him pampering Saroja.'
'If you don't mind being a voyeur,' said Sandhya heartily, 'I can let you have the true picture.'
'Anyway, it's some way away,' said Roopa, winking at Sandhya, 'But isn't the way he derived Saroja's name thrilling?'
'Don't you think he's creative?'
'Of course,' said Roopa reminiscently, 'hope Saroja imbibes some of his creativity.'
'Hope she shapes up well,' said Sandhya, as they went back to Saroja
'Why not,' said Roopa in admiration, 'she having the craftsman of a man for her father.'
'Is it about me?' said Raja Rao, who overheard them, as they reached him by then.
'Of course,' smiled Roopa.
'I feel flattered,' he said with a smile, 'that you both find me interesting to talk about.'
'I better leave before you wish I had left,' said Roopa in jest to him. 'But isn't it too early to wish you good night.'
'Oh, you naughty!' said Sandhya smacking Roopa's bottom.
Feeling elated, Roopa came out of the sprawling compound, and got into a rickshaw.
'Hasn't she showed me the green light, the dear thing,' she thought in excitement. 'But won't she be hurt if she comes to know that we jumped the signal? Oh, why didn't I wait a little longer? But then, didn't we make it rather providentially. All said and done, can I conceive a better way to bring about our union? What an exceptional time we have had! But, if I were in Sandhya's shoes, would I be as generous? Not as much as much as she is.'
That night, the thought that Sandhya more than reciprocates her love seemed to please Roopa. And as she dwelled upon their love triangle, she had a sneaking feeling that her lover could be craving her more than his better half even.
What with her self-worth enhanced by her own feelings, Roopa sank into sleep, such as one which only a true fulfillment would occasion.
Next morning, as Ramaiah goaded Janaki to get ready to attend the wedding of his colleague's daughter, pretending a headache, Roopa stayed put in bed.
'Why not I stay back,' said Janaki with concern.
'Why do you make me feel guilty,' said Roopa goading her parents to go. 'It should be okay soon. I may even make it to the lunch. Who wants to miss a pellibhojanam?'
Having seen her parents' back, Roopa in contemplation waited for Raja Rao.
'Perhaps, it's the fate of illicit love to cohabit with lies. What a paradox it is, that a noble sentiment like love needs the prop of a base instinct for its survival! It's as though the pleasures of a liaison act as intoxicants to help dampen the sense of guilt in a woman's heart.'
The thought of guilt made her feel odd about the rendezvous she had chosen for her adventure.
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br /> 'Am I not violating the sanctity of my parental place?' she began to think. 'How would my father react if ever he comes to know of it? But then, isn't he guilty of brainwashing me into the marriage? Well, whether he likes it or not, he's sure to shroud my secret. Who wants a scandal on his hands? But now, I'm more of Sathyam's wife than his daughter, am I not? How marriage alters even the fundamentals of a woman's life! Whatever it is, I won't let these silly sentiments spoil my party with Raja.'
Though she breathed easier on the fatherly front, she continued to feel choked in the friendly arena. As she felt that her guilt of seducing Sandhya's man lingered on, in spite of the nobility of Raja's love, she was insensibly gripped by an urge to confess to Sandhya and seek her consent to carry on with Raja.
'Why get bogged down by guilt,' she thought at length, 'when I can fly with the wings of accommodation provided by Sandhya understands? But I need his nod for that, don't I? Well, I'll make him understand that we've no right to wrong her any more.'
From then on, Roopa waited for her lover, more for the sake of his wife than for her own self. When she spotted him at some distance, she felt at ease, as though he were coming for her deliverance and when he took her into his arms, she sank in his embrace as if to deliver her soul to him. Ashe lifted her head to envisage her visage, he felt that it looked aesthetically beautiful and thrilled by the charms of her frame; he wondered whether the purity of emotions rarefies the soul to surface onto the face, to enable the fusion of the inner beauty with the outer grace. Won't such demeanor get imprinted in the minds of those who espy that visage then!
'Sandhya has issued the visa from me,' she said in all eagerness.
Tell me what happened,' he was taken aback by her manner, but as she pictured the magnanimity of Sandhya's soul, he felt Immensely relieved.
'Roopa, 1 can understand your feelings,' he said, hugging her. 'And 1 love you even more for your sensitivity. Baring your heart might lighten your burden, but have you ever thought how that would affect her mind.'
'Don't you know how Sandhya loves me?' she said ecstatically. 'With open arms, she would Invite me Into your life.'
'1 too feel so,' he said persuasively, 'but we shouldn't make It a bolt from the blue for her. Though shocked herself, she could be happy for you. But then, won't she suffer for her own sake?'
'Oh, I'm sorry,' said Roopa remorsefully. 'How I've got carried away! Why I didn't I think from her angle?'
'Roopa,' he said assuredly. 'Have patience for happier times. Let her slowly get used to our closeness, and prepare herself for our Intimacy. As we three go along together, let things lead from one to another. Only that would be smooth on her, and not your dramatic confession. Don't we love her enough to care for her feelings?'
'In the meantime, then,' she said overcome by emotion, 'let me bear my own guilt.'
'What guilt Is that,' he said, after kissing her, as though to suck out her guilt, 'when you've got the blank cheque from her. Some time In her presence, we might sink Into embrace, prompting her to enlace us for making It a threesome.'
'Imagine,' she said dreamily, 'how that would strengthen our love?'
'In three fold ways,' he said as he motioned her.
Then, Roopa In tranquility led her Raja to her bed, to let him solace her soul.
'I'm glad our love Isn't a spoiler either way,' she said, after he made love to her. 'Don't you find her sexier, being a little plumpy?'
'Oh, she's handler to fondle now,' he winked at her, fondling her. 'With both of you carrying equal weight, won't that make It more of a balancing act?'
'Oh, for me to have a greater fare,' she thought recalling her same sex amour, 'won't her figure auger well?'
'Whom do you love more?' he asked her, finding her lost In her thoughts.
'If not for her, I wouldn't have had my savior In you,' she said In all earnestness, 'I led you Into my heart, but In her tracts of love.'
'But It's not the case with the output of our ardor,' he said a little disappointed. 'You let It go waste.'
'I'll be on pills before you're there,' she said, ardently going over him. 'But for now, so be It.'
'Roopa to be honest with you,' he said, holding her In his arms, as they felt satiated at length, 'Often 1 delve Into my heart, to gauge If the levels of my love for you both are any different. As I realize to my relief that they are even, I probe my mind to monitor your emotional currents that stir my soul. Oh, how synchronous they both seem. Then, 1 check my conscience for dichotomy If any and I always find It filled with equanimity. It feels so soothing that you both sing the song of my love In tandem.'
'Raja,' she cried In joy, 'give her more of your love as she Is the better one. Oh, how I oweall this happiness to her.'
'Roopa, now I know why Sandhya loves you as she does,' he kissed away her tears. 'I shall love her all the more for that.'
'I'm dying for our orgies,' she said ecstatically, 'when will you bring that about?'
'That will be, when it will be,' he said in all assurance, 'but come it will.'
Long after Raja Rao had left, Roopa kept wondering whether her urge for orgies could be the manifestation of her need to expiate her guilt in a sex triangle with her mates.
Chapter 32
Chat at the Bar
On the day of Saroja's barasala, Sathyam arrived to Sandhya's delight. Thanking him for coming, she hoped that he and Roopa would soon give her an opportunity for reciprocity. What with his dormant desire coming to the fore as he took Saroja, Sathyam looked at Roopa in hope.
'Write down her name,' said the purohit to Raja Rao, handing him the rice slate he made in a silver plate.
As that raised the curtains for the naming ceremony. Raja Rao went through the exercise, watched by Sandhya by his side and even as the purohit announced that Saroja was the name chosen, Sathyam said in excitement, 'a lovely name.'
'Thank you,' said Sandhya affectionately. 'But don't run away, I want to talk to you.'
When she closeted with Sathyam after the function, Sandhya briefed him about the idea to rope in Roopa in Integral Architects, the name Raja Rao had chosen for their enterprise.
'I take it as a brotherly duty to concede to you?' said Sathyam genuinely.
'I'm glad,' she took his hand, and said, 'Roopa was doubtful about your agreeing to it.'
'Well,' he said ruefully, 'I've learned from my mistake. Had I obliged her then, perhaps, we wouldn't have missed what we had missed all along.'
'Why rue over the past,' she said, pressing his hand, 'let's hope for happy times.'
'I'm happy,' he said seemingly happy, 'slowly she's warming up to me.'
'I heard you've been drinking like a fish,' she sounded dissuading.
'But I'm trying to cut down now,' he said.
'Nice to hear that, let's go and congratulate her,' she said leading him to Roopa and Raja Rao who were engaged with Saroja.
As Roopa was visibly happy at the development, Sathyam felt as though he could shed
part of his burden of guilt, and when Raja Rao said he would like to spend some time with him, he proposed a discourse over drinks.
At the gates of the Eagle Bar that evening, Sathyam was impatient for Raja Rao's arrival. When he spotted him, he went halfway in welcome, and as Raja Rao apologized for making him wait, Sathyam turned boisterous.
'You're not late but I was early,' said Sathyam, taking Raja Rao's hand that was extended for him, 'Isn't drink known to beckon Its addicts ahead of others?'
'Why should 1 grudge that fact at all?' said Raja Rao smiling.
'I'm glad you're soon joining us,' said Sathyam, having In the meanwhile ordered one large Bag Piper each for them. 'Roopa Is delighted to say the least.'
'They say girls' friendship suffers In their marriage,' said Raja Rao. 'But they seem to prove the proposition false.'
'Yet, they are so unlike,' said Sathyam, gulping the drink that the bearer mixed for them by then. 'Are they not?'
'But alike at heart, 1 think?'
said Raja Rao, sipping from his glass. 'It looks like their childhood affection took strong roots to grow Into deep adult attraction.'
'But, let me tell you,' said Sathyam. '1 used to be jealous of their closeness but now It feels divine watching them together. But I'm sore that I didn't have a like childhood.'
'Thankfully, I've had a great childhood,' said Raja Rao dreamily, 'though the memory of It Is hazy.'
'It seems happiness loses Its focus In memory, even as unhappiness remains vivid In our minds,' said Sathyam In all bitterness. 'Unfortunately for me, I was handed out a bad childhood, what with my father believing In placing It In the locker of his experience. What's worse, he didn't grant me the freedom of an adult either. Left to myself, 1 would have been a better child and a less bitter man.'
'But as It appears, there Is no right kind of bringing up children, though there are many wrong ways of spoiling them,' philosophized Raja Rao, as was his wont. 'Having said that, 1 might add, the mediocrity of man gets reflected In the bringing up of children. You may know, Jean Paul Satre feels that but for a few, men are mere fools, and It's not hard to Imagine how such shape up their progeny. The problem with most parents Is that they reduce their children to the toys of their joy. It's sad they forget that their kids would be better off. If only they're groomed to face the roughs and toughs of life.'
'Why, It's every bit true,' said Sathyam, animated by the discourse. 'My father all but treated me as his favored possession. When I wanted to study engineering at Manipal, he said I was too young to fend for myself. Oh how he ruined my career and all! M Ind you, I wasn't a bad student at all.'
'I can understand your feelings,' continued Raja Rao, to Sathyam's solace. 'But we can't grudge our parents for having failed to come up to our expectations. The very fact that they hadn't reduced us to child labor was In Itself a favor. If they chose so, being hapless at that age, there was no way we could have resisted them In anyway.'
'Whatever, my life would have been much different being an engineer,' said Sathyam, gulping his drink In all bitterness.
'That's life - full of Ifs and buts. Isn't It?' said Raja Rao, sipping the dregs.
'But then,' said Sathyam, 'don't parents end up blaming their children for the perceived neglect of them? Sulking In bitterness, they push their children Into the vortex of guilt.'
