Finding Hope (Love's Compass Book 2)

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Finding Hope (Love's Compass Book 2) Page 5

by Snitker, Melanie D.


  Lexi shook her head. “No. How long was I under?”

  “Two hours in surgery. It’s been about an hour since you entered recovery.”

  Lexi struggled to clear her head. She blinked her eyes rapidly and took a sip of water that Patty offered. It helped, though she thought she’d have to drink a gallon before the rough feeling in her throat would go away.

  “Two hours — that can’t be good.”

  Patty gave nothing away. “I’ll go let the nurse know you’re awake. The doctor wanted to come and tell you how things went herself. I’ll be right back.”

  Apprehension pooled in the pit of Lexi’s stomach. She tried to tell herself that, good or bad news, the doctor would want to relay that information personally. There was no point in assuming the worst and she needed to relax. It wasn’t working.

  A moment later, there was a touch to her arm. Had she fallen asleep again? Her eyes flew open to find Doctor Ravenhill checking her monitor while writing something down in her chart.

  “How’s your pain level, Alexis?”

  “It’s okay. I’ll live.”

  “Good. If it gets worse, let one of the nurses know and we’ll increase the medication.”

  The doctor paused and Lexi steeled herself. “How’d it go?”

  “I’m sorry to tell you that the mass was malignant. You have ovarian cancer. The good news is that I removed the entire tumor along with the ovary, which means that the chance of cancer cells escaping into the blood stream was kept at a minimum. I performed a complete hysterectomy like we spoke about. I checked the lymph nodes and there were no signs that the cancer had spread beyond the ovary.”

  Lexi felt numb, her heart hammering painfully in her chest. It wasn’t what she’d wanted to hear. It was, she quickly realized, what she’d expected.

  They had gotten the mass out and the cancer hadn’t spread. That was the important part. If one had cancer, it was the kind of news you hoped to hear.

  She felt peace flow into her heart and make its way through the rest of her body. Tension in her shoulders dissipated and she let herself sink back into the pillow.

  “Okay. What about chemo?”

  “Yes, I recommend several sessions of chemotherapy to make sure we’ve destroyed any possible cancer cells that might be left behind. We’ll go over that at your post-surgical appointment.”

  Lexi’s mind raced, but she couldn’t speak. It was a lot to take in when her brain was still fuzzy from the anesthesia and refused to focus.

  “Do you have any questions for me?”

  She shook her head. “Not yet. I know I will.”

  “Take your time. I want to keep you here overnight. You should be able to go home tomorrow afternoon. I’ll be by in the morning to check on you.” Doctor Ravenhill offered her an encouraging smile. “I know this is overwhelming. It may have been ovarian cancer, but the surgery went as well as I could have hoped for. When I return in the morning, you may have more questions. I’ll be happy to take all the time you need to answer them.”

  Lexi nodded. “I appreciate that. Thank you, Doctor. For everything.”

  “Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  The doctor left as the reality of her words hit home.

  Lexi had ovarian cancer and she was going to have to go through chemotherapy. Part of her wanted to cry. A much larger part felt a great deal of relief knowing the tumor had been excised and no longer had its claws in her body. Thank God it had been caught early.

  ~

  ~

  The doctor had come out and spoken to the family after initially seeing Lexi. The news she had cancer hit them all hard.

  Lance rested his head back against his chair and let out a slow breath. A hand absently rubbed his goatee as he watched Serenity and Grams hold each other as they cried. Grams was rubbing her granddaughter’s back and murmuring words he couldn’t quite hear. Tuck and Laurie exchanged worried looks. They chose to focus their energies on Gideon and keeping him entertained.

  Lance had no idea what to say or do to ease their sorrow. Or even how to address his own.

  On one hand, he wanted to kick the chair over and scream about the unfairness of it all. Lexi, who spent her life helping others both inside and outside of work, shouldn’t have to battle this.

  On the other hand, he wanted to shout praises to God for the successful surgery. The doctor felt that, between the complete hysterectomy and chemotherapy, Lexi should be cancer-free. They’d caught it early. The doctor said it was the kind of outcome she wished for all of her patients.

  The end result was good news. But imagining what all Lexi must be going through right now as she faced this new reality made his heart ache for her.

  He was glad Patty was in with her. He didn’t think he could have handled knowing Lexi was having to deal with everything on her own. The doctor told the rest of them that Lexi needed a few hours and then they could visit her.

  The members of the Chandler family were brushing tears away and pulling themselves together. Discussion was turning to where they should all go for a late lunch.

  “Is pizza good with you, Lance?”

  His head snapped up at Tuck’s words.

  “Yeah, that sounds fine.”

  He followed them. He hadn’t realized how cold it was in the hospital until they stepped outside and were greeted by the relentless summer heat.

  As they ate pizza and breadsticks around a large table, Grams addressed them all.

  “When we see Lexi this evening, keep it upbeat. She doesn’t need us all going in sniffing and acting like this is the end of the world.” She sprinkled enough crushed red pepper on her pizza to rid an elephant of sinus trouble. “We may not have gotten what we’d hoped for today, but the end result is still the same.” Despite her best attempt, the older woman’s eyes grew damp. “My oldest granddaughter will live a long life, praise God.” She dabbed at her eyes with a napkin. “That’s a miracle no matter how you look at it.”

  Serenity reached over and gave Grams a hug along with a napkin to dry her tears. “It’s okay, Grams.”

  “Of course it’s okay.” She blinked down at her pizza. “It’s the peppers. I shouldn’t have used so many red peppers.”

  Lance hid his smile as did most of the others around the table. Grams could blame the tears on the peppers all she wanted to, but they knew better.

  After finishing their meal, the family planned to head back to the hospital.

  “I’ll catch up with you guys,” Lance told them. “I want to give you all some family time first. Tell Lexi I’ll be by in a while.”

  Tuck tried to convince him he should join them but Lance stood firm. “I’ll be another hour. I don’t want to rush her and she will be exhausted as it is. It’s more important that her family has time to visit with her.”

  Besides, he had two places he wanted to go first and a promise to keep.

  Chapter Six

  The laughter was good for Lexi’s spirit, but her entire abdomen screamed in protest. She draped an arm over it and held the other hand up in surrender. “Stop. Please!”

  The laughing died down momentarily as her family tried to respect her request. They were careful not to make eye contact with each other for fear of starting up again.

  Gideon had hands over his ears and was standing in front of the window overlooking the parking lot. He’d started pacing and Lexi caught Serenity’s concerned glances. She waved her sister over.

  “You should head home. It’s been a long day and I know what it took for you guys to be here. I really appreciate it, but if you go back now, you can be home by Gideon’s bedtime.”

  “Are you sure? I feel horrible leaving before you’re released.”

  “Are you kidding? There’s no need for you to spend another night at the hotel.” She observed her nephew with a pang of sympathy. “I wouldn’t stay here if I didn’t have to.”

  Serenity gave her a small smile and hugged her gently. “I’ll see you when you get back home.”
She reached for her son and tugged him to her side. “Tell Aunt Lexi bye, Gideon.”

  Lexi reached for his hand and squeezed it. “Bye, big guy. Thanks for coming to make me smile. I’ll see you soon.”

  She watched her sister and nephew leave the room. A need to shift her position slightly resulted in a whimper. Lexi closed her eyes against the pain. She was already on medication and wanted to avoid anything stronger.

  A movement near her bed caused her eyes to fly open. Tuck was bending over her, concern etching his face. “We should get out of here and let you rest.”

  “I’m okay. Getting tired, but I’m also a little hungry.”

  “You know that’s proof, right?”

  “Of what?”

  “That you and I are more alike than you want to admit.”

  She chuckled and regretted it as every nerve ending from her knees to her neck screamed in protest.

  “Did I hear a certain patient say she’s hungry?”

  Lexi looked to the door of her room and saw Lance, his hands behind his back, and a mischievous smile on his face.

  When the family had returned from lunch a while ago, she’d hoped to see him. The level of disappointment she’d felt when he hadn’t been there had taken her by surprise.

  Her heart fluttered as he came forward to stand next to her bed.

  “Hi. How are you feeling?”

  “Like I’ve been run over by a really large truck. Twice. And don’t make me laugh.” She pointed a finger at him in mock seriousness. “I was wondering if you’d skipped town.”

  Lance gave her a wink. “I wouldn’t dare. But I did sneak in some contraband.”

  Tuck raised an eyebrow at his friend and Lexi would have sat up straighter if she’d had the energy to do so. “Oh?”

  “First, I saw these and thought they looked neat. They’re supposed to be low maintenance. When I was paying for it, the lady at the register told me they bring good luck.” He brought a hand out and handed her a planter with three large bamboo plants growing out of it. They snaked around each other, their green leaves bringing much needed color to the hospital room.

  Lexi smiled, admiring the panda bears that had been painted around the pot. “Thank you. This is perfect.”

  Patty cleared a spot on the little table near the bed so Lexi could set it down.

  Lance threw a look at the door to her room and ducked his head. His voice just above a whisper, he said, “And I made you a promise.” He produced a bag with Cane’s printed on the front. “I told you I would pick some up for you.”

  She felt her mouth water at the memory of the fries and chicken strips. “Are you serious?” She took the bag and peeked in. “This is awesome.”

  Tuck tipped his head back and laughed. “You got her hooked on Cane’s? Nice.”

  Patty was shaking her head. “I don’t think she’s supposed to have solid foods yet.”

  Lance gave Lexi a small wink. “I think I remember Grams saying that Lex here has an iron stomach. She’s going to need more than Jell-O and broth to get her strength back.” He hesitated. “If you aren’t up to eating, it’s no big deal. I just wanted to bring you something.”

  Lexi needed to erase the hesitant look from his face. His gifts were more than considerate. He’d put a lot of thought into the things he’d chosen and she didn’t want him to think twice about it. She made a show of clutching the bag of food to her chest so no one could take it from her. “Are you kidding? I needed this. Thank you.”

  His eyes shined and he gave her a slow smile. “In that case, I have one last thing. You know what they say. Chocolate makes everything better.” Lance held his hand out, palm up.

  Lexi reached for the two Hershey’s chocolate bars with a grin. “Okay, you have to promise to come to all my surgeries in the future. And dental appointments. Oh, and check-ups. Thanks, Lance, this is great.”

  ~

  Lexi’s fingers brushed his hand as she took the chocolate. It was the slightest touch, but his skin felt hot as if he’d been burned. “You’re more than welcome. Although I’m not sure how much your dentist would appreciate my bringing chocolate bars to your cleanings.”

  She beamed at him. Lance had spent years packing away feelings he’d had for this woman. He thought he’d been successful. Somehow, she’d managed to drag them all out of storage in a matter of weeks.

  Lance wrestled with his thoughts, pushing them to the back of his mind as he studied Lexi. He tried to ignore her pale skin and the dark circles under her eyes.

  It felt wrong for them to send her home tomorrow. A complete hysterectomy did not seem like a surgery that would require only a twenty-four hour stay.

  He wondered if she would have help at her apartment. At least it was on the bottom floor so she wouldn’t have to negotiate a staircase. Maybe she would spend a few days at the Chandler house.

  It wasn’t his position to ask. He had to hope the family members worked something out among themselves so Lexi wasn’t home alone until she was ready.

  Lance went to the back of the room, feeling out of place. Laurie joined him. “That was nice of you.”

  He shrugged. “I figured she could use a pick-me-up.”

  “Well, it was a great idea.” She brushed some of her long, red hair out of her face and folded her arms as she leaned against the wall. “I hate hospitals.”

  Lance chuckled. “I’ll bet you do. I’m surprised you don’t associate them with Tuck.”

  She laughed. The second time Laurie and Tuck had met, he’d had to drive her to the hospital after her photography studio had been broken into. She was in the hospital again when she was stabbed. She’d certainly endured her fair share of visits for the last year. “I could do without the hospital.” She gazed across the room at the tall police officer, her eyes reflecting the adoration she felt for her new husband. “But any association I have between that and Tuck is one of protection.”

  Lance had a sudden longing to have a woman gaze at him and care about him like that. In response, his eyes flitted to the bed and the face of his best friend’s big sister.

  He stamped down the thoughts and emotions that tried to push their way to the surface. What good did they do him right now?

  Tuck gave him a nudge, which Lance purposefully ignored. The family was wishing Lexi good night. Both Patty and Grams offered to stay with her, but she refused.

  “I’m going to sleep all night. Or at least attempt to. You may as well go back to the hotel. I’ll see you guys in the morning.” She smiled at each of them. “Thank you all for being here. It means a lot to me.”

  Lance waited until they had all said their goodbyes.

  He took a few steps closer to the bed. “My dad has an appointment tomorrow morning and Mom needs some help getting him there. I’ve got to drive back to Kitner tonight. I’m sorry I won’t be here tomorrow.”

  She held a hand up to stop him. “Kitner is where you need to be, then. I appreciate your coming here today. And for everything.” She reached over to touch the bamboo plant. “Tuck is lucky to have you for a best friend.”

  “I hope you’ll consider me your friend, too, Lex. If you need anything, please don’t hesitate to call me. I’ll sneak food in for you anytime.”

  She smiled, a twinkle lighting her tired, brown eyes. “Thanks, Lance. I think I’ll be okay. I’m going to eat a chicken strip or two, set up a blockade to prevent the nurses from bothering me, and pass out for the duration of the night.”

  He knew she was kidding, but he could picture her limping to the door and finding a way to bar it closed. “Well, don’t overdo it. I’ll see you soon, I’m sure.”

  “I’m sure. Drive careful.”

  Lance lifted his hand in farewell and left the room, closing the door softly behind him. As he walked to his car, all he could think about was Lexi. He pictured the way her dark hair had fanned out over her pillow. The woman had an amazing ability to face a difficult situation with her head up. He admired that about her. But as determined
as she was, everyone could see she was in pain. If circumstances were different, he’d have sat with her through the night.

  As he drove down the highway towards his hometown, he replayed the day’s events in his head.

  “God, thank you for watching over Lex today. Thank you for guiding the hands of the doctors, that they were able to remove all the cancer. I pray that you give her peace so she can rest and recover as fast as possible.” He paused. “Please let the chemotherapy coming up do its job and get rid of this cancer for good.”

  Because a world without Alexis Chandler wasn’t a reality he cared to consider.

  ~

  Lance slid into one side of the booth across from Tuck. They had made arrangements to meet for breakfast that Monday morning before their work days began. They used to do that regularly when he worked with Tuck and it was one of the things he missed the most. Sometimes, Lance wished he had more people around during business hours. By evening, he often felt starved for conversation.

  He figured it would get better with time. But for now, he missed regular visits with his best friend.

  They both ordered steak, eggs, and toast. Once their food arrived, they wasted no time in digging in.

  Lance raised an eyebrow. “Doesn’t Laurie feed you?”

  Tuck swallowed and held a hand up. “Oh, she cooks fine. Better than fine. But she’s a little more into light breakfasts. Which I have no problem with. I’m just enjoying the steak and eggs.”

  “Gotcha. They do taste good. We should meet here once a week.”

  “We should.”

  Five minutes later, they had agreed to have breakfast together every Monday morning. A good way to help kick off a new week.

  When their meals were gone, Lance leaned back in his seat. “How’s Lexi feeling?”

  “She’s doing well, considering. She stayed with Mom Friday night and Saturday, but decided she wanted to go home on Sunday.”

  Lance chuckled. “That doesn’t surprise me at all. When is her post-op appointment?”

  He knew she would find out about the chemotherapy then. The thought of it turned his stomach into knots. He could only imagine how Lexi was dealing with the wait for more information.

 

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