Chances Are

by Wendy Lindstrom

  “More like dark auburn,” Adam chimed in, causing another round of laughter.

  Dawson stood in the midst of their byplay realizing that these proud men had inherited the best of both parents, strength and integrity instilled by their father, and compassion and intelligence and a wonderful sense of humor from their mother. Dawson knew that Hal Grayson was indeed a great man, who had built a successful business for his sons to carry on, and who had also created a strong and loving family that had survived and flourished in his absence.

  Boyd set aside the ax and stretched his legs out, crossing his ankles and eyeing Dawson. “So, Mr. Crane, we’d like to know what your intentions are towards our mother.”

  “What?” Dawson expected to see a playful grin on Boyd’s face, but instead his look was steady and serious. Dawson glanced at Kyle to see if they were jesting. It seemed like the kind of heckling Boyd would instigate. But the boys all seemed interested in his answer, and so he squared his shoulders and said, “I intend to be her friend. I’ll leave the rest up to her.”

  Boyd laughed. “If you’re leaving this up to her, you’re in for a long trek, my friend.”

  “And if you’re thinking of moving her to Crane Landing, it’s not going to happen,” Kyle added, only he wasn’t smiling.

  Dawson’s back stiffened, but he tried not to take offense. “What I’m thinking, young man, is that your mother is capable of making her own choices and that those decisions are hers to make. Not mine. And not yours.” He winked to keep things light, and said, “Now unless you boys have any other questions, I’m going outside to help Leo and the young’uns fill the wagons with slabs.”

  Boyd’s eyes filled with admiration as he looked at Dawson. “I’d say you’ve given Kyle exactly the answer he asked for, Dawson. You and Adam go on ahead.”

  “Come on, Dawson. We’ve got a lot of wood to load.” As if Adam sensed the tension, he headed to the door where he stopped and spoke to Duke, his adoptive father and a man Adam loved and admired. “Don’t forget that Grandma is planning an early supper tonight. We’ll see the rest of you later on at the street lighting ceremony.”

  Dawson stopped at the door and spoke to Kyle. “Thank you for the tour. You boys have a great operation here and your father would be very proud of all of you.” He stepped outside behind Adam and ended the inquisition by closing the door. That was an awkward situation he hadn’t anticipated.

  The blast of cold air hit his face as he stepped into the yard. He tightened his scarf and tucked it securely into his coat. He turned up his collar in a last-ditch attempt to brace against the cold.

  “Brrr!” Adam exclaimed. “I hope this wind dies down before we head out tonight. The ladies will never stand for this wind, especially for the little ones.”

  Dawson could only nod as he and Adam set to work. For two hours he turned over Kyle’s comment. It was Kyle’s tone that had offended him, not the suggestion. Dawson knew Nancy couldn’t leave her family. He figured they could spend a few months in Maine and a few months in Fredonia, even alternating homes every few weeks if she desired. Nancy had family in both states now, and Dawson had naturally assumed she’d be happy to split her time between both places that she seemed to love. But now he wasn’t so certain, which added a hundred pounds to his aching back.

  Chapter Five

  Nancy had enjoyed spending the day with her girls, but she was tired when the last baking sheet was washed and the baked goods were wrapped and stored in the pantry. After the girls left, she lay on her bed resting her eyes and her aching back for ten blissful minutes. The others, Adam and Rebecca and Dawson, were sitting in the parlor visiting while they waited for her to dress for the lighting ceremony.

  After donning her warmest dress and underskirts and stockings, Nancy hurried to the parlor, announced she was ready to go, and then headed to the foyer to pull on her boots.

  As she sat on the hall tree bench and tied the laces on her boots, she glanced up to see Dawson entering the foyer.

  As their eyes met, she barely contained her gasp. The man took her breath away every time she saw him, and tonight was no different. Dressed in black wool trousers and a dark blue sweater, he looked rugged and very attractive. It appeared as if he’d simply finger-combed his hair back off his forehead and let it fall over the top half of his ears. The ever-present warmth in his blue eyes stirred feelings in her that she’d thought long dead. She had resigned herself to living the remainder of her life as a mother and grandmother. But Dawson had reawakened the woman in her—and that woman wanted him.

  Her heart and her mind were at war. She needed to settle her thoughts so she and Dawson could enjoy their time together.

  “You look beautiful, Nancy,” Dawson said, playfully pulling her up beside him. “I hope you’ll be warm enough this evening.”

  She delighted in his touch, but stepped away as Adam and Rebecca entered the foyer. “I doubt any of us will be warm enough. It’s simply awful outside.”

  “We’ll have to huddle like a herd of cows around a barn door at milking time,” Dawson said, reaching behind her to retrieve her coat.

  Nancy laughed, but Rebecca arched a brow at Dawson. “Being likened to a herd of cows isn’t at all flattering, but if huddling will keep us warm, I want to be the cow in the middle.”

  Amidst laughter and joking about the frigid weather, they all bundled in their warmest coats and scarves. Dawson held Nancy’s coat as she tucked her arms into the sleeves. It used to be Hal helping her on with her coat. He would always give her a quick kiss before they headed out. But it was Dawson assisting her, and she couldn’t help the feelings of betrayal that coursed through her. Assisting her with her coat seemed like a simple and insignificant thing, but how many other ways would Dawson replace Hal in her life, if she allowed him to?

  After they had dressed, they ventured into the blistering cold.

  Adam and Rebecca stepped out ahead of Nancy, leaving Dawson to pull the door closed behind them. He tucked Nancy’s hand in the crook of his arm to escort her down the steps. When she would have retracted her hand, he snugged it against his side. “It’s a bit slippery. I could use some support, if you don’t mind.”

  Alarmed, she met his eyes. “Would you like me to get your cane?”

  He gazed down at her with a wide smile. “What do you think?”

  Heat rushed to her cheeks and she closed her eyes. “Oh.” She peered at him from beneath her lashes. “That was obtuse of me.”

  He just chuckled and turned them toward town.

  Nancy tugged her scarf up over her mouth and nose to protect her face. With each step she took, she tucked in closer to Dawson as they followed Adam and Rebecca. “I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to stay out tonight in this cold. I do hope they’ll turn on the lights quickly so we can get back to my warm fireplace.”

  “I agree, Grandma,” Rebecca replied from ahead, snuggling into Adam’s side as he tucked his arm around her. “With this full moon, I’m not sure the new lights will be all that spectacular anyway.”

  They walked as briskly as possible along the snow covered road, leaving four sets of prints down Liberty Street. Radford had taken his family to town by carriage, needing to keep the younger children tucked snuggly in the carriage. He’d offered to ready a carriage for Nancy, but she thought they would enjoy the short walk to town. Now she wished she’d accepted his offer.

  As they entered the village and crossed over Main Street, they made their way into the crowded Common where the lighting ceremony would be held. Nancy began to shiver. Her toes were freezing!

  Helen Fiske, Rebecca’s longtime friend and the eldest daughter of Tom and Martha Fiske, rushed over and welcomed Rebecca home. Rebecca exchange an exuberant hug with her childhood friend, who had become a beautiful young woman with blonde hair and her mother’s blue eyes. It was obvious to Nancy that Rebecca was happy to see Helen, but Nancy also knew it pained Rebecca that her accident had left her memories of Helen sketchy. Still, it warmed h
er heart to see the girls creating new memories and continuing their friendship.

  “Leo is with some of our friends from school who would love to see you two,” Helen said to Rebecca and Adam. “They’re just over there.” She gestured toward the fountain where a crowd had gathered.

  “Grandma, will you be all right here for a few minutes?” Rebecca asked, her excitement at reconnecting with her friends evident in her sparkling eyes.

  “Of course, dear. Go enjoy yourself, but mind you don’t get too cold.”

  “I’ll keep her warm,” Adam said, snuggling his wife beneath his arm and growling like a protective bear.

  Rebecca laughed. “We won’t be long.”

  When they rushed off with Helen, Dawson slipped his arm around Nancy’s shoulders. “You look positively frozen. Should I deposit you in Radford’s carriage and tuck you in with Evelyn and the children? Do you think there’s room for both of us to squeeze in?”

  “I wish there was!” Nancy met his eyes, enjoying his sense of humor. “I see I’m not the only one who wishes we’d have come in the comfort of a carriage.”

  “But we didn’t, and so we’ll have to make the best of it. Shall we huddle in the middle of the crowd where it will be warmer?” Dawson asked, offering his arm to her.

  “I like the way you think, Mr. Crane.” Nancy took his arm. But as much as she wanted to snuggle into his warmth, she wasn’t willing to make such a public statement about their relationship, especially when she didn’t know what that statement would be. This was Hal’s town. Every friend she’d ever made here was with Hal. Walking with Dawson, acting familiar with him, would send a message she wasn’t ready to address. So she resisted the temptation of his private smile and warm arms, and kept her gloved hand resting lightly on his coat sleeve.

  Disappointment filled his eyes, but he simply patted her hand, and then escorted her towards the center of the Common.

  Barker Common consisted of twin parks separated by Temple Street, and it was one of Nancy’s favorite places. Towering maple trees graced the Common, creating a leafy canopy in the summer and a colorful display of reds and golds each fall when the maples dropped their leaves and carpeted the park. A decorative cast iron fountain stood in the center of each park. Wrought iron benches provided a place where Nancy could sit and watch her grandchildren play when they came to town.

  A gazebo stood in the west park, freshly painted in honor of the occasion. Typically, the park was quiet in the late evening, especially on one as cold as this, but the Common was abuzz with activity. Nancy and Dawson wove through the crowd, exchanging pleasantries with her friends and neighbors as they made their way to where her sons and their families had gathered. She laughed as the younger children in the park scurried about in excitement, not heeding their parents’ warning to stay close. The adults all chatted, shifting their feet and ducking their chins, each battling the cold as they waited for the ceremony to begin.

  Two of Faith’s aunts approached from the other side of the common, giving Nancy a cheerful wave. Nancy knew these ladies weren’t really Faith’s aunts, but the delightful women had been a lively addition to Fredonia, and Nancy had welcomed them into her home and into her family with open arms. Faith’s aunt Tansy and her husband Cyrus had taken Leo Sullivan and his younger brother Benny, two hungry orphans, into their home over a decade ago, giving the boys the loving parents they desperately needed.

  “Hello, Tansy. Aren’t Cyrus and Benny with you this evening?” Nancy asked.

  The blonde haired, slightly tarnished but still beautiful southern belle was bundled in a black wool coat and purple scarf and hat. “They’re with Leo and Adam and Rebecca discussin’ last minute plans for the orphanage project. They’ll be over shortly,” Tansy responded in her lovely southern drawl.

  As they chatted, the deep tolling of the bells sounded from the three churches around the Common, signaling the beginning of the lighting ceremony. The crowd surged in around the gazebo where the Mayor, bundled up like a bear, stood flanked by the Village Trustees. The closeness of the crowd was uncomfortably tight for Nancy, but it provided an additional barrier against the cold, and so she allowed herself to be pushed against Dawson. Being so close to him, and waiting for the lighting of the park, made her heart pound with excitement.

  Even the children had stopped running and were standing attentively, waiting for the word from the Mayor.

  With a loud, booming voice that carried on the frigid air of the winter evening, the Mayor addressed them. “Ladies and Gentlemen. We are pleased to see so many of you out on what has proven to be a very cold evening. We won’t keep you outside long, as I’m sure you all want to get back to the warmth of your own fires. The Ladies Auxiliary will provide a small reception in Union Hall immediately following the lighting. We hope you will all join us afterwards. I’m proud to announce that on this evening, in approximately one minute, our new electric lights will illuminate our beautiful village for the first time. We hadn’t expected to compete with this full moon overhead, so you’ll need to pay close attention to see the lights,” he joked, causing a ripple of laughter through the crowd. In the next instant, the lights surrounding the Common illuminated, creating halos around the bulbs overhead and a soft shimmer across the snowy park and surrounding streets.

  A gasp arose from the crowd, followed by thunderous applause.

  As exciting as the lighting project was for the residents of Fredonia, Nancy was having trouble mustering excitement. Watching the transition from gas to electric lighting was just one more way that she felt life passing her by, moving faster and faster as if she were standing still. This was another major event in Fredonia that Hal had missed, that she had witnessed without him at her side. She missed him desperately in these moments. She mourned for all of the milestones in her life, in her children’s lives, that he had missed out on. Hal had loved their village and would have celebrated its progress with great pride. But she was struggling to feel the joy that so many in the village felt tonight.

  She turned to Dawson. “My toes are frozen, and I’m eager to return to my warm parlor. I’d like to go home now.”

  “That makes two of us,” Dawson said. He leaned over and spoke to Adam, who nodded in return.

  “We’ll be along in a few minutes,” Adam said. “We’d like to visit with Leo and our friends a few more minutes.”

  Beneath the shimmer of the moon and the new street lights, Nancy clung to Dawson’s arm as they made their way across Main Street. They walked out Water Street and stayed left to continue on Liberty Street. With only the moonlight to illuminate their way, and the cold night to encourage them to share their warmth, the walk became romantic. Many an evening Nancy had walked this street or through the orchard with Hal at her side. But he wasn’t here, and he would never walk beside her again. She had to let him go. She knew that, but the thought of doing so made her want to sink to her knees and weep in the street.

  “What’s troubling you, Nancy?” Dawson asked, his breath creating a frosty cloud in the night air.

  She sighed and glanced up at his shadowed face. “I suppose I just want things to stop changing for a while.” She sighed. “I remember when we first got gas heat in the house. It was beyond wonderful not having to build a fire for heating or cooking. Progress is a good thing. I know that, and yet sometimes… it’s frightening how fast the world is moving.”

  “Perhaps it wouldn’t seem so fast if you were moving, too, Nancy.”

  Her jaw dropped.

  Dawson grinned at her surprise. “If you live in a cave and shut out the world, then every time you stick your head outside you’re going to notice a lot of changes.”

  She stopped and gaped at him. “Of all people, are you suggesting that I’ve shut myself away like a recluse?”

  “When you’ve been living in a cave, it’s easy to spot other cave dwellers, darling.”

  Nancy gasped. “I… I honestly don’t know whether to be offended or if I should thank you for pointin
g out something I’ve never considered.” She shook her head and gazed into the darkness behind him. “Have I really shut myself away, Dawson?” She swung her gaze back to his. “I hadn’t meant to. I thought I was being a good mother and surrounding myself with my children and the lives they were creating.”

  “That’s a beautiful thing, Nancy. I’m not suggesting otherwise. But it’s easy to hide within the midst of your family… or in a small cottage on a peaceful riverbank. I know because that’s exactly what I’ve been doing for years.” He cupped her cold cheek with his leather glove. “I don’t want to hide away anymore, Nancy. I want to step right into the middle of this busy world and start living again. And I want you right there with me.”

  He lowered his head and kissed her. Although his lips were cool, their connection was as electrifying as the lights in the Common.

  Heat surged through Nancy’s shivering body. She sank into Dawson’s arms and embraced the man she’d been missing. She’d missed his warmth, his humor, their easy conversations and the security of his arms.

  He deepened the kiss, surprising her with its intensity. This man knew passion, and he was making it clear that they were both very much alive and still young enough to engage in a thrilling romance.

  For one blissful moment, she savored being held in Dawson’s arms and imagined it a possibility. But a howling gust hit her as if trying to shake some sense into her. Reluctantly she eased back and placed a tender kiss on his cold cheek. “Anyone could come along and discover us, you know.”

  He chuckled and kissed her ear. “I don’t care.”

  “I do,” she said backing away. “I’m too cold and too tired to answer anyone’s questions tonight. Let’s go home where we’ll have some privacy and the benefit of a warm fire.”

  “Sounds wonderful. Let’s go home and make our own fire.”

  She laughed and pushed out of his arms before she gave in to the temptation. “Are you attempting to take advantage of me?”

  “Not at all,” Dawson said with a light laugh. “We’re both too experienced for that to happen. We’re building this fire together, Nancy, and you know full well what we’re doing. So consider this fare warning not to ignite a blaze you can’t control.”