by Lacy Hart
“Oh my God,” I said to Caleb. “How did you survive after he slashed you? You must have gone to the ground.”
Caleb got a serious look on his face.
“I stood up, took my knife out, and stabbed him in the chest.”
We sat silently for a moment as I processed what he was saying.
“Situations like that, when you’re facing someone that way and your life hangs in the balance, everything just sort of kicks in – instinct, training, adrenaline – it’s all there. I did what I had to do to survive and keep him from killing anyone in my unit. That was my job.”
Caleb said it all in a very matter-of-fact manner. It was almost like he was detached from himself when he was talking about it, like he was discussing another person or something you saw in a movie.
I wasn’t quite sure what to say or how to respond to that. Part of me never really thought about what he might have done as a soldier. Before I could say anything, Caleb continued. It was like he needed to get this out and say it before it got shut away again.
“You don’t set out with the goal of killing anyone, Sarah. Have I done it before? Yes, more times than I’d like, for sure. But I did what I had to do, and I’m glad I’ll never have to do it again.”
I placed my hand on his left cheek, cradling his face in my hand. I leaned in and kissed Caleb on the lips. It was then that I noticed the scar just below his shoulder, above his chest.
“That one is from getting shot. Sniper fire in Africa,” Caleb said to me as I pressed my finger on the scar.
It was difficult to process for me, and I could only imagine how tough it was for him to process and go through.
“It must have been terrifying,” I said to him. “How did you do it… living every day like that? Never knowing if someone is going to try to kill you?”
Caleb sighed, and I wasn’t sure if that was a sign that he was uncomfortable talking about all this or not.
“You can’t think of it like that, Sarah. You learn not to think like that because if you do, you get tentative, you make mistakes, and people die that way. The guys in your unit, they trust you more than anybody in the world – more than their parents, girlfriends, wives. It has to be that way. They needed to know I was watching out for them just like they were watching for me. “
I wrapped my arms around Caleb again and held him tightly.
“I don’t know how…” I cut myself off before I could finish the sentence.
“Don’t know how what?” Caleb asked as we lay back on the bed.
“I don’t know how your wife… how she did it,” I said somberly. “I don’t know that I could have done it. The worrying, the not knowing where you are, what you’re doing, if you are okay. I would have been a wreck.”
Caleb was silent again. I hoped I hadn’t hurt him by bringing up Ella. I knew her presence was strong in his home and his life, and if I wanted to be part of his life, I would have to deal with that.
“Sometimes I don’t know how she did it, either,” Caleb said to me quietly. “She was incredibly strong, strong enough for the both of us and for Adam. I am sure she had her moments – all Army spouses do. I know it was tough for her with me being in Special Forces, not being able to tell her where I was or talk to her as often as I would have liked to. Somehow, she shouldered it all.”
Caleb turned to his side and looked at me, looking deep into my eyes.
“I think you’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for, Sarah,” he told me. “You’ve been through a lot and dealt with it. You should be proud of yourself for what you have done. You work hard, you’re close to getting your degree, and that doesn’t just happen.”
“I’m not strong,” I answered. “It took me a long time to get over all this, to finally get to a place where I felt like I could trust someone again, and the first sign of a problem, I ran away.”
I was feeling dejected again, but Caleb wouldn’t have any of it. He pulled me close to him, pressing his bare flesh against mine.
“It’s not easy to… to deal with life all the time. There have been plenty of times where I have run and hid too, especially since I’ve been home. I think sometimes we just need the right person to come along in our lives at the right time to make a difference and turn things around. Maybe… maybe we’re both at that point right now.”
I smiled up at Caleb and realized I was feeling even stronger about him now. We kissed again and held each other for a long while before I heard Caleb’s stomach rumble. I laughed as I looked over at him.
“Are you hungry?” I asked him.
“Well, since I’m not getting to the diner tonight for my late-night fix, I guess I could eat something. How about you?”
“I’m on a different eating schedule than most normal people,” I told him. “I eat dinner by 5 or 6 at the latest, and then I’m good for the night. But I would love to make something for you.”
“Hmmm, well I don’t think I have much here in the fridge,” he replied, getting up out of bed and putting a pair of black boxer briefs on. “I usually eat my meals with Adam and Linda at the house. Let’s see what I’ve got around here.”
Caleb walked out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. I reached over to the floor and grabbed my panties and put them on. I then noticed the t-shirt he had been wearing laying on the floor. I picked it up and slid it on and made my way to the kitchen.
Caleb was leaning over, peering into the fridge in his small kitchen. I sidled up alongside him, bumping my hip against his playfully as we looked in.
“You’re right,” I told him. “You don’t have much going on here.”
I noticed some eggs and bacon, and a few vegetables and knew I could make something from them.
“How about an omelet?” I said to him as I bent over and peered into the fridge. I looked back over my shoulder when he didn’t answer and could see him peering at me.
“I didn’t hear a word you said,” he said to me with a smile.
I turned to face him, getting up close to his body.
“I asked you if you would like some eggs,” I said softly and then gave him a quick kiss.
“Sure, that sounds good,” he replied. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“You can make some coffee if you have some,” I told him as I gathered ingredients out of the refrigerator.
“You got it,” Caleb said as he poured water from the tap into the coffee pot.
I went about getting everything I needed, like a cutting board and knife, and a frying pan from under the cabinet. Every time I bent over and could feel the t-shirt riding up on my body I knew Caleb would be staring at me. The last time, I made sure to give a little wiggle to grab his attention. After that, Caleb came up behind me, wrapping his arms around me while he kissed my neck.
“You’re not playing fair,” he whispered into my ear.
“Go sit down,” I told him, “or I’ll never get these eggs done.”
“Yes Ma’am,” he said with a mock salute. He walked out of the kitchen to the other side of the counter and sat on one of the stools so he could watch me cook.
Once I had all my supplies, I set to work, getting the bacon going in one frying pan. While the bacon sizzled, I chopped away at some red onion, tomato, and orange pepper to dice them nicely. I then grabbed a couple of eggs and cracked them into a big coffee mug and beat them gently with a fork. I let the other fry pan start to heat up while I took the bacon out and let it drain on some paper towels.
Following what Justin had taught me at the diner, I poured the eggs into the center of the heated pan and gave them a vigorous stir for a few seconds before lifting the pan and tilting it to spread the egg around the curds that were gently forming. After letting the eggs set and get a nice crust, I gave the pan a little shake to make sure the omelet was freed from the pan. I sprinkled in the veggies, made my folds, and slid the egg onto a plate. I tossed on the bacon and sprinkled some salt and pepper on. As a final touch, I added a little hot sauce I found in t
he cabinet to give it a kick.
“Here’s your omelet,” I told him, placing the plate down. I turned to grab the pot of coffee and poured each of us a mug, handing Caleb his mug.
“Wow, thanks,” he said to me. He dipped his fork into the egg, grabbed a piece and ate it happily. “You’re a good cook,” Caleb said with his mouth full. “This is great.”
“Thanks,” I said with a blush. “Justin taught me a lot of cooking tricks when things would get slow. I like cooking anyway, and knowing some techniques makes it more fun.”
“I feel bad,” Caleb said to me as he picked up a piece of crispy bacon and munched on it. “You spend your life serving food. You shouldn’t have to do it on your time off.”
“Oh, it’s not a big deal,” I said to him.
“It is to me,” he said. “Let’s go out somewhere nice tomorrow night, anywhere you want to go. You deserve a night out where you don’t have to worry about anything.”
“We don’t have to do that,” I told Caleb as I snitched a piece of bacon off his plate.
“Yes, we do,” he insisted as he polished off the last of the omelet. “You have a few days off. Let’s try to make the most of them.”
“That sounds good to me,” I said with an upbeat smile. I walked around the counter and stood next to Caleb. He got up from his stool and took me in his arms.
“In the meantime,” he said as he lifted me off the ground so that he cradled me in his arms, “I have something else we can do to make the most of our time.”
Caleb carried me down the hall and into the bedroom, playfully tossing me onto the bed before climbing onto the bed with me. In no time at all, I was in his arms again as he kissed me over and over. Caleb looked over at me as we lay facing each other. I saw his gaze move up and down my body.
“What?” I said to him.
“I just noticed you’re wearing my t-shirt,” he said to me.
“I like it,” I told him as I hugged myself. “I already stole your other one and have been wearing it to be every night,” I admitted.
“Really?” he said with a smirk. “Well I don’t think my t-shirt has ever looked better,” Caleb remarked as he trailed his fingers down from the shoulders of the shirt across my hips until he reached the hem of the shirt.
“Actually,” he told me, “there is one way it will look better.” He quickly lifted the shirt over my head and tossed it on the floor, then turning back to me with a grin as we rolled on the bed.
20
Caleb
The entire day was a whirlwind experience for me. Opening the door and finding Sarah standing there, in obvious distress, and knowing that she turned to me to help her, to give her the safe place that she could count on, made me happy. The rest of how the day occurred was not something I had planned. I was easily swept up in the moment and didn’t want to resist it in any way. Being with Sarah that way all day and night restored something that had been missing from my life for a long time.
Part of me thought I would feel guilty or should feel guilty about making love to Sarah. More than once I saw the picture of Ella on my nightstand during the night, and I thought for sure it would be pangs of emotion across my mind and heart, perhaps even enough to stop what I was doing. But that moment never came. Everything just felt so right to me throughout the night. Every movement, motion, reaction, and feeling were in the right place at the right time, and I didn’t want it to end any time soon.
When I woke in the morning with Sarah in my arms and the sun lightly peering through the blinds on the window, life felt perfect for the first time in a long time. I managed to move out of bed without waking Sarah, and she curled up comfortably on my bed, burrowing further into the pillow, as I rose to go take a shower. By the time I got out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around my waist, Sarah was propped up in the bed, blanket pulled up to just over the top of her chest, smiling at me.
“Good morning,” I said to her as I went to my dresser for some clothes.
“Hmmm, good morning to you,” Sarah purred. “That may have been the best night I have had in a very long time.”
Sarah rolled onto her side as she watched me get dressed. She gave a wolf whistle when I tossed the towel to the ground to put my briefs on. I then grabbed a pair of jeans and tugged them on, and then sat on the bed next to her, bending down to kiss her. Sarah moved her face, so it was right under my chin and inhaled.
“I love the smell of a freshly showered, clean man,” she growled as she snuck in a longer kiss this time.
“I’m glad to hear it,” I said as I kissed her back, letting my hand wander down to the small of her back.
Sarah lay back on the bed, so I had more room to get next to her on the bed.
“So, what’s the plan for today?” she asked me. “I’m usually just in bed for a little bit at this time on a Monday, so I have a lot of energy with a good night of sleep behind me.”
“We can do whatever you want,” I told her. “The only thing I have to take care of is an appointment I have at 6 tonight.”
“What do you have to do so late in the day?” Sarah asked. At first, I felt a twinge of reluctance to tell her, but I wanted to be honest and upfront with her from the start of this relationship.
“I have a doctor’s appointment,” I said to her. “It’s with a psychiatrist here in town.” I did feel a little embarrassed about letting her know and wasn’t sure what her reaction would be.
Sarah looked over at me, and the leaned her head against my chest.
“Okay,” she said softly to me. “Do you think it helps you?”
“Well, I’ve only seen him one time so far, but yes I think it was a big help even just from the start. He convinced me to open up a bit, talk to people, and make new friends.” I put my arm around her and kissed the top of her head.
“I’m glad that you listened to him,” she said, looking up at me.
“After my appointment today, we can go out. Or even before the appointment if you want. It’s your choice.”
Sarah sat up next to me and lightly kissed my neck as her left hand gently brushed against my chest.
“Let’s go out after your appointment,” she said to me with a smile. “I’ll have to go back to the house so I can grab some clothes and things for tonight.”
Sarah hopped off the bed and went over and grabbed the t-shirt of mine she wore for part of last night. She put the t-shirt on and her panties, and then went over to the nightstand and grabbed her phone. She looked down at it and grimaced.
“What’s wrong?” I said to her.
“Nothing, really,” she said to me. “My brother sent me a bunch of messages and called several times looking for me.”
“You should let him know you’re okay,” I told her. “He’s probably pretty worried about you.”
Sarah sighed and then began typing on her phone, obviously crafting some reply to her brother. Within seconds of her sending it, her phone was vibrating, indicating a call.
“I should answer this I guess,” she said to me as she walked out of the bedroom and into the living room. I closed the bedroom door to give her some privacy and then finished getting dressed. I sat on the bed, pulling my sneakers on, and could hear Sarah’s muffled voice get raised a bit at times. I knew if it was my sister that had disappeared during the night I would be worried sick about her and would want to know she was safe, so I was sure her brother felt the same way.
I finished making the bed and Sarah came in the bedroom, her face a little red.
“Everything okay?” I asked her.
“I guess,” she said as she slumped down onto the bed. “I told James I was fine and that I was with you. He was a little upset that I never returned his messages or calls, especially after he went to the diner last night and they told him I took the night off. I’m surprised he didn’t track down where you were and come pounding on the door.”
“Sarah,” I said to her, taking her hand, “if you need to go back home then go. I understand complete
ly. You need to work things out with your family.”
“Caleb, I don’t want to go back home just yet,” she said. I could see the sadness in her eyes about the thought of going home and what it might hold for her. “Is it… is it okay if I stay with you… just for a few days… until I can figure out what I’m doing?”
“Sure, of course,” I told her.
“Thank you,” she said quietly. “Would you go over to the house with me? I know there shouldn’t be anyone there right now, but just in case… I don’t know if I could handle it by myself right now.”
“I’ll drive you over,” I told her, standing up from the bed. “If you see a car there and are worried about it, we can just drive along and go somewhere else.”
