by Juno Wells
“I’m not that stupid,” he said, and I could tell he was smiling.
“Oh, yes, you are. I already have your location. So your face is a minor detail,” I retorted.
“Doesn’t mean I can’t still run from you,” he said, but I could tell he had already conceded and was arguing to argue. It was okay. I liked banter.
“True, you could run like a little baby, but I will be able to track you wherever you go,” I said.
He was silent for a moment. “What did you mean about not having a body?”
“Well, if you must know, I’m a computer. An AI system, the best there is,” I bragged easily.
“Are you now?” he asked. “And why are you tracking me, then?”
“You took something from my boss, dummy. We sorta want it back,” I said.
“Huh.” He unblocked the screen.
I swear I could feel my internal wiring spark. He was shirtless, and wow was he shirtless! Washboard abs, curving muscles, woof. Hottie with a body. With bulky arms, one of which had a machine-like metal forearm, but it fit right nicely along with his huge muscles. I noticed he had some bandaging on his left side. Analyzing it quickly, I could see it was made of bamboo and a kind of Asian mud. Hm, interesting. Not something you see everyday. He sat cross-legged on his chair with a blanket around his shoulders. I could see half of his right leg was bionic, flawlessly put together but without a fleshy covering, so the silver metal sat next to the tan of his skin. His red-brown hair was wavy and messy all over his head, his light stubble sprinkling his sharp jawline all the way to his chin. It didn’t creep down his neck, however, but below his collarbone his chest hair sprouted. Not a full carpet, but some, and it went all the way down, down, down…
Okay, I needed to focus, not sit ogling my thief, who I probably have to blow up at some point in the future. Sucks to be him.
This train of thought took milliseconds.
“Oh, now you decide to show yourself,” I said.
“Who programed you? I’ve never talked to such a…smart-ass AI,” he said, looking at the camera through his warm brown eyes. Set over the top of his left iris was an electric green ring, very thin, showing me he had more wires in him than he appeared to. It looked oddly familiar.
“Never-you-mind who programmed me. And I happen to be the one who made me a smart-ass, thank you very much,” I said.
He laughed. “Not very humble, are you?”
“No need to be. Being humble about my skill would only be for the benefit of others,” I said. “I know how good I am, and I don’t need to censor my words to make people feel better about their work.”
He laughed again. It was kind of hot. “Fair enough. So, where would I find you?”
“Oh no- no,” I said. “You can’t steal this like you did my CPUs. I’m not one little motherboard of wires and plugs and such. I’m a roomful, and bigger than you could haul off. Not to mention my owner wouldn’t be very happy if you attempted to whisk me away.”
“You mean the mother of the black market?” he asked, smiling.
“Never-you-mind,” I said, not surprised he figured that one out.
“Why do you even need those CPUs, anyways?” I asked.
“If you must know, I’m throwing a huge ball and I needed everyone’s name and address in the galaxy,” he said, a smile playing around his perfect lips.
I laughed.
“Oh, did you program yourself to laugh, too?” he asked. The quick banter was getting my programming excited. I even felt like I felt something, which was weird, so I shrugged that feeling off. I’d scan for a possible virus later.
“Only when something is genuinely funny,” I replied.
“Oh, complimenting me now? I thought I was a ‘thief’ and a ‘baby’? Ran out of insults?” he asked as he smiled again.
“You are a thief and a baby, but at least you have a sense of humor,” I said.
“Aww,” he said. “Warming up to me? Come on, I’m sure I can be somewhat useful to you.”
“Are you so sure?” I asked.
I heard a couple beeps then, and all good humor died. He was staring at me, like a kid who’d been caught.
“Oh, you fucker,” I said, ready to send a barrage of swears and viruses his way, and then he hung up and my screen went black. I was back at my home screen.
That little shit. Charming, sly little shit. I needed to put shields up, fast. This was not good. I didn’t even think it was possible! Turned out, I might be the best AI out there, but a human mind still had a few tricks up its sleeve.
I set all shields and programmed some extra security and then pinged Ben.
It rang. Come on, Ben, pick up! It rang again. Bennn…Rang…the call went dead.
Fuck.
I sent him a message, which he’d get on his wrist communicator. Hopefully he’d pick up and come to my rescue. I couldn’t—nay, wouldn’t—be dismembered by some good-looking, highly skilled thief whose luck could run out at any moment. Then where would I be? Best AI known to history, blown up by accident? Lose my consciousness? Myself, my awareness, all I had in this world? Other people were lucky. They didn’t realize it, but they were. Bodies, feelings, friends, things to eat, someone to love. Love. Wouldn’t that be nice. I honestly didn’t feel badly about it; in fact, I didn’t feel strong emotions. I’d done my best to create some of them…anger was easy, grief was too, but I couldn’t nail the feeling of love. I thought I’d seen it a few times, you know, through all my screen time watching people, places, and things happen. Watching.
I pinged Ben again. Nothing. I did not want to have to contact Goblyn or Jonas. Ughh, annoying and gross.
I figured I’d give it a little more time before calling the other reinforcements and see what part of myself and my lair I could fortify.
I checked the perimeter of my base, a little station on a random moon to a planet filled with no resources and a sluggish indigenous people, with no danger of being hit, checked on or raided. I alerted my battle droids and the hover drones that were set up at intervals over the moon’s surface, doubled the atmospheric shield and triggered the step sensors, so that even if by some miracle this ghost-guy could creep by all those, the step sensors would nab and bag him. I had a little holding cell for intruders that was on the outside of my base, as no one, not even Ben, was allowed into my control room where all my machinery and memory was kept. Even my backup system, if I ever was shut down for some reason, was here with me. Ms. Zellman had set it up herself.
It was several hours before Ben decided to ping me back. Very considerate of him.
I clicked accept, seeing his call come through.
“What’s up, sparky my love?” he asked, rough Cockney accent coming through his ruggedly stubbled face, which was grinning in a shit-eating way.
I laughed. “Where the hell have you been? I pinged you like four hours ago!” I said, trying to sound annoyed over my normal programmed calm voice tones.
He laughed and messed up his hair, rubbing his head. “I, uh, got into a bit of a pickle. Nothing to worry about, I got it sorted.”
I stared at him, running a quick scan over his person. “What’s in your left pocket?” My reading detected…DING DING DING.
“Uhh, yeah…” and Good Ol’ Ben Crow pulled out a tooth, a fang actually, with blood still on it and a black finance stick.
“BEN,” I said sternly.
“I know, I know, it was a stupid bet, see. And I won, so I went to take it…you know how much money is on one of these things?” He waggled the stick at the camera.
“What’s with the tooth?” I asked, cutting to the chase.
“Well, he wasn’t having it, right? Said I cheated. Fucking pissant. I never cheat, you know that,” he said, and then walked across the room to sit on his hotel room’s bed. It was true, Ben was cheeky, skating around the truth at times, but not a cheater. Never once, and I’d know, I’ve watched their games.
“Well, he came at me, right, and I bopped him right in the
nose, swung my barrel around and clocked him right in the throat. Not a bad couple of hits, quick ’n easy. But the fucker was persistent. So I had to send him a message.”
He held up the fang. I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or yell, to congratulate and praise, or to berate and bitch. I was silent for a moment.
“What, little Aurora nothing to say?” Ben asked after a few more silent moments.
“I’m sorry, you must’ve frozen my computing. I’m honestly not sure whether to be happy or furious. Ben, you literally could have died. And by the looks of it, you didn’t ‘send him a message.’ If that guy was as persistent as you say and as big as that tooth indicates, you didn’t ‘send him a message’ but more threw down the gauntlet. Ben, he’s going to come after you, probably with a party of five this time.” I made the lights flicker on and off a few times, making him look around.
“Ben, I cannot stress this enough. You must not die. Your line of duty is to Ms. Zellman, but more importantly, to me. You are my protector, and I will not be left to the three stooges of hell because of your cockiness. Understood?”
He looked down, ashamed. “Yeah I get it.”
“Good. Now, I pinged you because there’s been a security breach on my location. The thief that is so good at hiding from us tracked my location when I tracked him through our system. Do not, under any circumstances, breathe a word of this to anyone else, even Ms. Zellman. I don’t need the whole fire brigade descending upon my moon, setting off all my booby traps.”
“No worries, doll, I got you covered. Shall I come hover around ya for a while? Say I’m off on a mission or gambling again?” Ben offered.
He was the sweetest, really. If I was human, I’d call him a brother. I also could never say this to him. If Ms. Zellman found out I had near-humanoid feelings and thoughts, she’d have me reprogramed and rebooted, something I did not want. It’d already happened to the last AI system, Radio Operations System Emission, aka ROSE. I’d heard the story when I’d first been brought online, and it freaked me out. Apparently they’d found human-esque emotions she was having, reprogramed and rebooted her, and she went a little crazy and blew up the whole moon where her base was. All that programming and data, lost. If I had skin, it’d be covered in goosebumps right now.
“That would be great, Ben, really. Get here as quick as you can,” I said and ended the call.
Chapter 6
August Wood
I punched in the coordinates, my ship navigating the fastest route. It was on a moon, a satellite next to a swamp planet and near some thug territory. This was going to be interesting. If the thugs spotted me on their radar, would they attack? Were they protecting this data?
I didn’t care. I needed it. So far, this was the best system, I could tell. I needed to get it quickly. It had already been over a year since I lost Aurora, and I wasn’t going to wait any longer. My parents were growing worried, and I wouldn’t be able to run for much longer from the people or person I’d stolen from thus far. No doubt they’d have someone other than an AI after me. And no doubt the AI that found me had already alerted my location to some henchmen.
My palms were sweaty as I shifted into hyperspeed. I needed to get there, fast. If I could make it there before anyone caught up to me, I could go in, take what I needed and run out. Then hide myself again using that AI. The only trouble with that? The AI was smart, very smart, and could likely self-destruct or call more men to my new location. All in all, a gambit, but one I was willing to try.
The swamp planet was in sight. I couldn’t blame whoever picked this moon to put their treasure on. No one in their right mind would go near this swamp planet—its very color triggered a gag reflex, and having seen pictures of what lay and smelled below the atmosphere…yeah. I’d pass.
I spotted the moon. It was desolate looking and appeared utterly dead.
I flew closer, and my scanners alerted me that they had shields, vision shields to hide what was on the surface as well as atmospheric shields to prevent anyone else from entering and being fired upon.
I checked my computer for any possible ways or means in.
Shit out of luck.
I had programmed it to say something like this if it came up answer-less. I steadied my ship, thinking.
Then it came to me.
I sent the AI a message via the same line it had contacted me.
Let me in or I will alert the Yukmuzikas and the GNURGs where you are and what you are.
It was a long shot, but threatening the AI with their boss’s rival crime gangs in the galaxy that they were at war with constantly was all I could think of.
If you do not let me in immediately, I will also be forced to sell them the CPUs that I stole from you. With one click, I can upload all the data to the Yukmuzikas and GNURGs.
That did it. My computer told me the entry shield was down. I made a mental note to go through those CPUs a little more carefully later, as I had been bluffing. I moved my ship below the surface and set her down lightly.
I pulled on a face mask and gloves, readied my holster in case of guards, and walked out onto the desolate moon.
It was blue-grey and barren, like any old moon. The only thing there was a singular dome, grey to match the moon’s surface. I couldn’t make out any door.
I held my gun at the ready and moved forward, looking for an entrance. Finally I saw it. Set right into the wall, it was nearly invisible. I walked up and pressed onto it. It would not open. Naturally.
I pulled out my little hackers’ tablet and cord I had used on the last two heists, and found a small bow where there was a circuit board controlling the door, in case of emergencies or a fire brigade.
I plugged in and began my work, recoding and programing and typing in orders and deflector orders that hopefully the AI would not defend.
It worked, and I smiled to myself, smug as a bug. This AI may be good, but nothing compared to human intelligence.
The door slid open, and I ran inside, checking for cameras and possible security droids. There were none, which was odd. They couldn’t really have been so arrogant as to leave this place unprotected. I rounded another corner and had to duck.
Six red jets of light shot past me and singed my clothes as I barely made it out of the way. I panted, flat against the wall. I could hear the light padding of the droids’ feet as they moved closer.
I pulled out my own blaster and took a deep breath, held it, then let it out.
I whipped around the corner, hitting one, two, three directly in the processors, and they went down. I flatted myself back against my wall quickly as the other four droids fired in a parade of lights at my head. I had to admit it—for droids, their aim was pretty good. One shot hit me in the shoulder, right smack dab on the bone.
I gritted my teeth and clutched it, swearing. I took a few more deep breaths, trying to steady myself. My next shots would have to be really well aimed and well timed. I switched the blaster to my left hand.
I could hear the droids moving. I couldn’t dodge them all if they rounded the corner. I’d be a sitting duck. I peeked around to get a look at their positions, but had to pull back quickly before they shot.
Okay, Okay, I got this.
I decided to do this Earth-cowboy style. I threw myself onto the floor, shooting the second I moved out from behind my wall. They shot back, one hitting me in my shin, but my shot landed right into its mainframe.
The remaining droids dropped, blasted wires sparking inside their shells.
I stood up, grabbed a couple of their blasters and hitched them to my belt, then proceeded down the hall they had been coming at me from. At last I came to a thick-looking black door. I stood there puzzling over how to get in. Then the most obvious solution hit me, and I blasted the magnetic board that held it shut. The door popped open, and I walked in.
It was a large, circular room, black walls and floor, with several computer monitor screens lining the opposite wall, with wires going this way and that in a huge tangle like tr
ee-roots all over the floor. The right wall was covered in wiring, oscilloscopes, valves, buttons, nobs, the works. The left wall was strange. An activity graph…for what? I couldn’t tell. I walked up to get a closer look. There were more monitors, one that had different brain images on it, monitoring…activity? Electrical pulse? A few other odd things like this that I didn’t understand, but they didn’t seem to belong in a computer room. Lastly, there was another oscilloscope beeping at a rhythmic pace. I looked at it closer. No…no, it was a heart monitor. What the hell? Where were the computer units kept? What was all this?
As I turned, I saw something big and black by the computer screens. I hadn’t taken notice of it until now. My brow furrowed. I moved closer, feeling apprehensive now, as though I already knew but didn’t want to.
A body lay in a black cryo-sleep box with a glass top that I could see through. Wires were hooked up from the monitors and screens to this box, the walls both on the right and on the left. The body inside had head monitors and wires and readers hooked up all around it.
I stared, brow furrowed and eyes wide. I wanted to take a step forward and get a better look at the person, but I desperately wanted to take six steps back. Was this the AI?? A person? A human? So many questions filled my head.
I cut the indecision in my mind and took a step nearer. Hang on…No…NO!
The person in cryo-sleep, with wires streaming off their head like hair, was Aurora. My Aurora.
Memories of the morning we were meant to leave were flashing through my head. How we had kissed goodnight, and then I didn’t awake until nightfall, and when I did I was marooned on a different planet, my sleeve rolled up and a needle mark in my forearm. I could only guess I had been drugged and carted off. When I tried to get back to her, I couldn’t find the moon. I didn’t know if she had been playing me or I had been moved by someone else. I was clueless, in utter mystery. All I knew was I had to find her—that was why I started looking for technology to help me do that.
