“Io, I think I owe you an apology,” Fran said, drawing my attention back.
“About being so mean to Nikola? I suppose it’s understandable, although really, even if Nikola had been from the past you remembered, he’s still Ben’s daddy, and thus due a little respect—”
“No,” Fran said, holding up a hand to stop me. “I meant about mentioning you guys being in love. I didn’t realize that it was possible for a vamp and his Beloved not to be in love, and I think I made you very uncomfortable. I’m very sorry if I did.”
“Ah, that.” I waved a hand like it didn’t mean anything. “I think it’s because Nikola and I are so much more matu—er—settled in our ways. We’re not young, like you and Ben are. Or rather just you. Not that you’re an infant, but…oh, you know what I mean.”
“Yes, I do.” She laughed. “I’m glad I didn’t offend you. And I’m really glad that you found Nikola, no matter how it came about, or what form the relationship takes. It’s just nice to see another Dark One who’s found his other half.”
I couldn’t help but look at Nikola, my gaze caressing him in a manner that I knew was going to spell trouble if I let it continue. I swear, my mouth started watering just from looking at him with his head next to Ben’s as they talked quietly.
“Isn’t that cute?” I said softly, nodding toward them. “Seeing them together like that, I feel like the Grinch when his heart grows so many sizes.”
“What do you think they’re talking about?” Fran asked Imogen.
She smiled, her eyes a bit bright with tears of happiness. “I don’t know, and I don’t care. I’m just so pleased to have Papa back, the Papa I remember from my youth. He was always such a loving man…until that day.”
“Which didn’t happen anymore,” I pointed out, feeling my own eyes getting misty, as well. “I bet they’re talking about something deep and important. I bet Nikola’s telling Ben how proud he is of him, and how much he’s missed him, and maybe even is offering fatherly advice.”
“Oh, yes,” Imogen said, sniffling happily.
What are you talking to Ben about? I couldn’t help but ask. Something sweet and tender and touching?
Yes. Nikola glanced my way. I asked Benedikt if he often caught his pubic hair on the fastening device of these breeches. He said that is what Jockeys are for. What is a Jockey? I do not wish to appear ignorant in front of my son. Is it something you stuff down the front of the breeches to protect your genitals?
I burst into laughter, unable to keep the mirth contained. “Oh, yes, they’re having a deep and important conversation.”
The two men, evidently through with said discussion, sat down opposite us. “You said you wished to help us locate Rolf?” Nikola asked, shooting me a look that let me know he could read my thoughts of just how I’d protect his pubic hair from undue zipper pinching.
“We would be happy to help you, but there’s a situation that has been growing steadily worse, culminating in the attack you saw earlier,” Ben answered, leaning back in one of Imogen’s curved easy chairs. “The liches were sent by an Ilargi, a lichmaster who is also working with a group experimenting on therions and now Dark Ones. The man who is the father of Francesca’s half sister, Petra, is responsible for the kidnapping of my blood brother David.”
“You have a blood brother?” Nikola asked, a little startled.
“Yes.” Ben’s eyes were dark with anger. “He is a therion, a leo of his pride, and he was helping me when he was taken. We’ve tried for three months to locate where de Marco—the lichmaster—has taken him, but every time we get close to finding where they’re holding David, they move him. Fran’s ghosts have assisted us, as well as those therions who haven’t gone into hiding to protect themselves, but we don’t have much information to go on.”
What’s a therion?
I don’t know. He thought for a moment. The word means dangerous animal in Greek. Perhaps…yes, I believe he’s speaking about a man who has an animal spirit. I read of such things, but I did not know if it was the wild imaginings of the author or a genuine being.
“So, there are animal spirit dudes who this lich guy is experimenting on?” I asked, not minding if I was the one who looked ignorant.
“Animal spirit…ah. Therions are shape-shifters,” Ben explained. “David’s animal form is that of an Asiatic lion. His pride, the group of therions that he leads, are all also lion shifters. The lichmaster is intent on building an army of therions he can control.” His gaze shifted to Nikola. “And lately, he’s wanted to try to control Dark Ones, as well, hence his interest in capturing me.”
“Which is not going to happen,” Fran said, moving over to sit on the arm of his chair, one hand tangled in his hair as she leaned into him.
Nikola watched them with interest for a few seconds before looking at me, one eyebrow cocked. I’m not as young as she is, I pointed out. I don’t perch on arms of chairs well. Not to mention that it’s undignified.
I do not think so.
Well, I do. Also, I’m not a young thing who can’t keep her hands off of you. I am, as you so obnoxiously pointed out, mature. I can sit in the same room with you without feeling the need to maul you, or touch your hair, or kiss you.
All of that sounds rather nice, actually.
Well, it can just sound nice. I’m not going to pretend I’m a giddy twenty-something madly in love with you. Besides, my behind is bigger than hers and needs a more substantial platform.
Your bottom is lovely, and just the size it should be. It gives me great pleasure. I enjoy looking at it and stroking it. I also wish to bite it, but I suspect you might find that objectionable, so I am content to keep that desire to myself until such time as you will let me do so.
“Oh, screw it,” I said, and took three steps to plop myself down on Nikola’s lap, wrapping one arm around him, and glaring at Imogen when she giggled. “Right, so those scythe guys were trying to grab you for their lich boss?”
“Yes. He’s made an attempt to kidnap Ben before, right after we were married.” Fran looked worried. “We were close to finding the whereabouts of David, and several of the therions de Marco has turned feral, for lack of a better word, caught us, and we had to run for our lives.”
“Tallulah said that Uncle Rolf might be tied in with the David situation,” Imogen said, her expression turning serious. “But I do not see how that can be. He is mortal, not a therion, and not a Dark One. Surely the lichmaster would have no interest in him, or vice versa.”
“I can see no reason why this lichmaster would have an interest in Rolf,” Nikola agreed, mentally considering and discarding various possibilities.
“Maybe you can’t, but I can,” I said, suddenly feeling chilled. I put my other arm around him, my stomach sick at the thought.
I can’t breathe if you clutch my head to your breasts like this.
You don’t need to breathe. You’re a vampire. And I want to keep you safe.
Once again, gratitude and astonishment filled him as he gently pried my arms from around his head. As do I with you, sweetling, but we have nothing to fear from Rolf. I am immortal, and it seems we are close to making you so, as well.
“What do you mean?” Imogen asked, stark white stress lines appearing around her mouth as she tightened her lips.
“I mean what if Rolf decided he needed some help getting rid of Nikola? He wanted him dead in the past; who’s to say he doesn’t want him dead now, too? Maybe that’s why he followed us here. Maybe he is seeing this as a way of settling a score, or satisfying a need to destroy, or who knows what? If he wanted Nikola dead, then who better to go to than a vampire-torturing lichmaster with a bunch of rabid werewolves at his command?”
“Therions, not werewolves,” Ben corrected automatically, but I saw the way he glanced at Fran. He suddenly looked just as worried as I felt.
“I don’t see how Rolf would know about de Marco, though,” Fran said slowly.
“But is it likely that he would be able to find inf
ormation about this lich dude? That’s the only issue I see. I mean, he’s not a vampire like you are, Nikola.”
“No, but he discovered what happened to me shortly after I was cursed,” Nikola mused. “He’s very good at uncovering secrets, and although I still do not understand why he would be anxious to see me dead, I will admit that he possesses the skills and intelligence to ferret out any assistance there is to be had. It is logical to conclude that he will strive to do so. We must prepare for the worst, and hope that our expectations of Rolf’s resourcefulness are inflated.”
“I’m confused,” Imogen said, looking exactly that. “It would be horrible for de Marco to kidnap Papa, just as it would be horrible if he were to get Ben, or any Dark One for that matter. But how is that unbalancing the present, as Tallulah said? How will this mean the deaths of many people?”
Nikola stilled as he read my thoughts, shaking his head in disbelief.
“You don’t think it’s possible?” I asked him.
“Unfortunately, I do think he could do that. I was simply appalled because of the realization that the son of my mother could do something so heinous. She would have died of shame had she known what a man he turned out to be.”
“Both of them. Remember your other brother was in on the plan to kill you.”
“What’s possible?” Fran asked, but before we could answer, the door was thrown open and the two ghosts came in.
“Goddess Fran,” the one named Eirik said, bowing to Fran. “Dark One. Dark One. Mother-by-marriage of the Goddess Fran. Imogen.”
“Father of Imogen,” the second ghost said, bowing even lower to Nikola. “I am Finnvid, warrior of Valhalla, beloved of ale wenches, slaughterer of many Huns and Visigoths. Your daughter, Imogen, and I have spent many nights swiving. She is very good at it, and I, as a warrior and one who is beloved by the ale wenches I mentioned earlier, bring her much pleasure in bedsport. For that reason, and because I do not wish to return to Valhalla and be left to swive the ale wenches who seek my bed so frequently, I seek permission from you to wed Imogen, and provide her with countless nights of enjoyment beneath me. We will name our first son in your honor, and he will be strong and ready to fight for you should you need his sword arm. Our daughters will be comely and make excellent wives. We will name one of them after Imogen’s mother, and if you like, one after your woman, although I do not understand how a name can have only vowels and no consonants. We will put some consonants in the daughter’s name.”
Finnvid bowed again, then waited, clearly leaving the conversational ball in Nikola’s court.
“Oh, Finnvid,” Imogen said in a little exasperation. “I told you that we’d wait a bit to talk to Papa.”
“I waited,” Finnvid protested.
“You wish to wed a ghost?” Nikola finally asked, looking hard at Imogen.
“Well…” She made a vague gesture. “I’m not getting any younger, and…er…he’s right, we do hit it off quite well, although I don’t think he needed to mention the ale wenches quite so much. So, yes, I think I’d like to marry him, and that way, I won’t be de trop when Benedikt and Fran are around, and now, of course, you and Io. You don’t mind, do you?”
“I have consonants in my name,” I protested. “I just don’t use them very much.”
“You do not use them at all,” Nikola corrected. “I spoke to you about that, but you took offense and struck me.”
“I did not hit you! I barely touched you. And besides, you deserved it, you were being obnoxious about my name, not to mention you kept sneaking peeks at my boobs.” I stopped, and cleared my throat. “But that’s not here or there. You go right ahead and do your fatherly thing.”
“What fatherly thing?”
“Whatever it is fathers do when a Viking ghost asks to marry their daughter.” Nikola just stared blankly at me. I slapped my hands on my thighs. “Well, how do I know what that is? I’m not a father!”
“They wish to name a child after you. I believe that involves you in the marriage negotiations,” he countered.
“Oh, no, you don’t. You’re not getting me involved in whatever bizarro historical thing dads did in your day. Dowries, wasn’t that it? Didn’t you dower your daughters when they got married?”
“No.”
“No?” I looked at him in surprise.
“I only have one daughter, and she’s never been married, so no, I have not dowered my daughters.”
I smacked him on the arm. “You know what I meant, Mr. Literal.”
He examined Finnvid, who straightened up and clearly tried to look like suitable marriage material. “Two sons,” Nikola finally said.
Imogen sighed, and rose, moving over to a counter to plug in an electric teakettle.
“Two?” Finnvid asked.
“You will name one son after me, and one after my father. The naming of daughters I leave to Imogen, although it would please me to see one named after Io. With more consonants in the name, obviously.”
“You are beyond obnoxious,” I told Nikola, getting off his lap and going toward the back of the trailer. “Imogen, I take it you have a bathroom?”
“Yes, it’s just before the door to my bedroom.”
I tended a little business, and returned to find Imogen pouring out cups of tea for herself, Fran, and me. The gentlemen had disappeared.
Is everything all right? I asked Nikola, worried at his absence.
Yes. The ghosts insist we celebrate the betrothal of Imogen with ale, which Benedikt says can be found in something called a food truck. What is a food truck?
It’s a truck with food. I thought we were going to tackle the issue of your brother?
We will shortly, but first I must negotiate the terms of the marriage settlement with the Viking.
Are you really OK with the idea of having a ghost for a son-in-law? I mean, can they even have children?
I am promised two grandsons and as many granddaughters, so I assume the answer is yes.
“Congratulations,” I told Imogen, toasting her with my cup of tea. “I hope you both will be very happy. And…er…don’t pay any attention to that stuff about naming children after your dad or me. Although obviously, if you wanted to name a kid after your father, that’s fine. I didn’t know—well, it’s not like I even knew ghosts existed, let alone could be tangible and stuff like that—but I didn’t know that ghosts could have children.”
“It depends on the ghost, evidently,” Fran said, sipping her tea. “Mine were raised by means of the Vikingahärta, an amulet which belongs to Loki, a big pain-in-the-patootie Norse god, so those ghosts are more substantial than your run-of-the-mill spirits, or so I gather. They can stay corporeal indefinitely.”
I set down my cup. “I just don’t know that I’m going to get used to this sort of thing.”
“It’s OK. I know just how you feel,” Fran said, patting my hand. She still wore her gloves, I noticed. She saw me looking at them, and grimaced. “I’m a psychometrist. I feel emotions and things like that by touching objects.”
“Really? That’s kind of neat.”
“It is if you’re not the one who has to deal with it,” she said with another grimace. “It’s not nearly as handy as someone who can summon a time-traveling portal. You don’t happen to have a screwdriver, do you?”
“A screwdriver?” I shook my head.
“Yeah, you know, like the Doctor?” She laughed when I continued to stare at her. “Never mind, it was just a little joke. I’ve been watching too much of the BBC. Did you really freak out when you met Ben’s dad?”
I sighed heavily. “Mostly. And a lot of it was his fault. I thought I was going crazy because I could hear his thoughts.”
“I imagine that was quite unnerving if you didn’t realize you were being marked,” Imogen said. “How exactly did you meet Papa?”
I settled back and went over the last few days in more details than I had at Tallulah’s trailer, glossing over the parts where I couldn’t keep my hands off Nikola. By the t
ime I’d gotten to the smutty FedEx woman, the men returned, looking extremely pleased with themselves. The Vikings smelled of ale and staggered in after Nikola and Ben, who just looked dark, dangerous, and oh-so-sexy. At least Nikola did.
“So what’s the game plan?” I asked when everyone was settled again. Nikola and I had possession of Imogen’s couch, which allowed me to surreptitiously press my leg against his in a way that made me very happy. Ben took up his spot on the chair, with Fran perched next to him. Imogen sat on a small ottoman next to Finnvid, and the other ghost, Eirik, murmured something about needing to stretch his back, so he lay down in the aisle and promptly fell asleep.
“As I see it, we have two problems,” Fran said, combing her fingers through Ben’s hair. “The first is the situation with David, but I don’t expect that to be solved immediately unless we get a whole lot luckier than we have been in the last three months. The second is to find Ben’s wicked uncle Rafe.”
“Ralph,” I said, frowning a little and wondering how we were going to find him.
“Rolf,” Nikola corrected.
“And stop him from meeting with your lichmaster, and thus destroying every vampire he can find in a three-hundred-year span,” I said.
“What?” Fran shrieked, making Ben jerk away and give her a pained look. “Sorry, Ben, didn’t mean to shout in your ear. What did you mean destroy every vampire in three hundred years? How can Ben’s uncle do that?”
“If he could use the portal to zip around time and capture vampires, he could do an unimaginable amount of damage,” I explained.
“Sweet mother of reason,” Fran said, looking horrified. “Is that what you were about to mention earlier? I can’t believe—it couldn’t be possible—no, surely Rolf wouldn’t go in for wholesale genocide. Would he?”
She asked the question of Nikola, but it was Ben who answered. “He might well do exactly that.” His gaze turned to his father. “I’ve always wanted to ask you this, but given the circumstances…well, that’s all changed now. Who do you think engaged the demon lord who turned you?”
A Tale of Two Vampires Page 24
