by Jen Calonita
"Why are you being so nice to me?" I ask him, and grab a slice.
He shrugs. "Believe it or not, I feel bad for you." He pulls out a slice for himself.
I roll my eyes.
"I'm serious," he insists, then chuckles. "Besides, if you don't clear the family name, no one will ever hire me!"
That makes me laugh. "There's the brother I know and love." For a few minutes, we both quietly chow down on the hot pizza.
"Your career is going to survive this," Matt says suddenly. "Everybody gets bad press. Look at Britney Spears."
I shake my head sadly and tell Matt about HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER EIGHTEEN: In this town, you're loved one minute and yesterday's news the next. That's especially true when you're a young star. I mean, look at that Home Alone kid. He was hot one minute and now he can barely find work. You go through one awkward stage or make one bad movie and the town forgets about you. There's always someone younger, prettier, and more talented ready to take your place. At a much smaller salary, I might add.
Matt looks at me and smiles. "But you're forgetting something," he says. "You also said Hollywood is a town where anyone can revive their career if they want it bad enough. You can fix this, Kates. You just have to come clean about why you pulled the stunt in the first place."
Downstairs, I hear the doorbell ring.
"Probably more press coming to tell me what a horrible person I am," I sigh.
"KAITLIN BURKE, COME DOWNSTAIRS THIS INSTANT." Laney's voice is unmistakable as it blares over the house intercom system. Matt and I look at each other, instinctively terrified.
"DO YOU HEAR ME, KAITLIN? I DON'T CLIMB STAIRS IN JIMMY CHOOS, BUT I WILL MAKE RODNEY GO BREAK THAT DOOR DOWN IF YOU DON'T COME TO THE DINING ROOM AT ONCE."
"Come on." Matt pulls my arm. "I don't want to tick her off. She just signed me." Rodney, Nadine, Mom, and Dad are sitting at the twenty-five-foot-long dining room table waiting for us. Laney paces back and forth in front of them, wearing a very responsible-looking black Versace pant suit.
"Oh, honey, you're out of your room!" Mom gives me a hug, the feel of her baby blue PB&J Couture jacket warming my cheek. Then she whispers in my ear, "You couldn't have combed your hair for company?"
Some things never change. I pull away and eye Laney suspiciously. "Don't say it."
"Well, I'm going to say it anyway," she retorts sharply. "You've made quite a mess here."
"She knows that, Laney." Nadine leaps to my defense.
"I've been on the phone all weekend," Laney continues. "I didn't even try to use the Marie Claire coverup. This is too big of a problem to use that now. I had to call all the gossip shows and threaten to never grant them another interview again if they keep airing this story. Then I had to call Liz's dad and start legal action against Sky's bodyguards for restraining you, Liz, and Rodney. Then I called Principal Pearson and asked her to speak on your behalf."
"What did she say?" I ask glumly.
"She said not to come to school on Monday," Laney tells me. "Like we were going to let you. You'll finish out the term with your tutor."
I'm not surprised.
"But she is doing interviews to explain why she accepted your plan and thought it was a good idea. She also wanted me to tell you that this incident will in no way affect her love of Family Affair." Laney rolls her black eyes.
"Well, I hope she'll still watch if I'm no longer on it," I mumble.
"Tom called this morning," Mom interjects. "He's worried about you, Kates. No one said anything about firing you."
"Have we heard from Hutch Adams?" I ask anxiously.
Mom looks at Laney and shakes her head no. "We're still trying to get ahold of him," she confirms sadly. My eyes start to well up again.
"I won't tolerate crying, Kaitlin." Laney slams her hands down on the table. "Hutch is probably waiting for some answers. Everyone is. Your fans, the students at Clark Hall. They want to know why you'd do such a crazy thing."
"But you said I couldn't tell anybody!" I protest. "You said it would destroy my career."
"That was before this happened," Laney says. "Now that it's out there, you have to explain yourself. Tell the world what you told us the night you strong-armed us into letting you go to Clark Hall. Tell them that you wanted to see what it was like to be a normal teen -- as boring as that might be." She cracks a small scarlet-lipped smile. "And tell them what that conniving brat Sky Mackenzie has been up to."
"Finally," Nadine groans.
"That kid has it coming to her," Rodney seconds.
"I don't know," Mom frets. "Should we really knock her? I mean, it might make Kaitlin look worse."
"I don't think so," Dad muses. "If anything, it will show that Kate-Kate has the stamina and the speed to cruise through career bumps and keep going."
I look at Laney. "I thought you said not to bash Sky."
"You're not going to hurl insults at her," she explains. "You're just going to tell exactly what happened. If you don't say something, someone else will anyway. Don't you think people are going to begin to wonder how she knew about your alter ego?"
"Yeah, Kates, she doesn't have an alibi for that one," Matt points out. "We've got her cornered."
I plop down in the velvet-cushioned seat next to Matt and sit quietly for a moment. "I don't want to lose my career," I say finally.
Hearing those words out loud surprises me. All this time I was running away from my harried life. But now that I'm in danger of losing it, I desperately want it back.
"Then don't," Laney snaps. "Fix this."
"But there's got to be a middle ground," I protest, getting mad. "I can't be the only actress who wants to work and have a private life too. What star doesn't need vacations once in a while? I just decided to take mine at, well, school."
"Keep going," Nadine encourages me, pressing her bible to her chest eagerly.
"And going in disguise was the only way I could attend school like a normal student. I wasn't trying to hurt anybody. What Sky did was cruel. Why would she expose her 'best friend'?" I make air quotes with my fingers. "I am NOT losing the Hutch Adams role to her!"
"Get that engine to full throttle, Katie-kins," Dad says with a pumped fist. Whatever that means.
"How do I fix this?" I ask Laney.
"By getting even," she answers. She throws a folder down on the table. OPERATION KAITLIN is written across the front in Nadine's perfect penmanship. "You're going on national television and you're going to tell everyone what you just told us."
Nadine grabs the folder and opens it up for me to see. She slides a paper in front of me. It's an itinerary typed up by Nadine. "We thought Jaime Robins would be the best person to do an interview with."
I nod. Jaime hosts one of the most popular weekly news shows. She's grilled everyone from Madonna to the Pope.
"She wants to hear my story?" I question.
"Everyone wants to hear it," Laney exclaims.
"Okay." I take a deep breath. "Let's do this."
The minute I'd given Laney the okay, she called Jaime, who jumped at the chance to come today so that she can run my interview tomorrow during prime time.
"Remember," Laney warned as she and Nadine finished my practice interview. "Don't use four words when three will do. Don't ramble on when one sentence is all that's needed. Keep a smile planted on your face -- not that tears won't go a long way if you need to cry -- and look directly at Jaime the entire time. Knock your knees or play with your hair and you appear nervous. Look away and the audience will think you're lying. Got it?"
"Got it," I answer firmly.
Two hours later, Jaime's three-member crew is setting up cameras and lighting in our spacious living room. Mom thought it was the best place to sit, since our periwinkle floral couches have their backs to floor-length windows that face the lush gardens in our backyard. Throughout the room, Anita arranged ceramic vases overflowing with lavender and roses (my favorites) that our gardener cut, the largest bunch sitting in front of me on the plu
sh leather ottoman coffee table.
"You look great," whispers Paul, who'd rushed over with Shelly the minute Mom called. He gives my coiffed hair a final once-over. Even Mom agreed with Laney that a simple, classic chignon would make the best impression today.
"Knock 'em dead, sweetie," Shelly seconds, and gives me a final dab of nude lip-gloss. Laney, who has orchestrated my every move today, wanted my makeup to look fresh and clean. ( "Not overdone like you have something to hide," she'd explained.)
I exhale slowly and smooth out the front of my fitted Stella McCartney khaki blazer that Laney called in for the occasion. Paired with matching wide-leg trousers and low-heeled pink Manolos, Laney says I look the picture of grace. "And innocence," she adds, approvingly.
I'm ready for this.
"Kates?" Nadine gently touches my arm. "You have a phone call."
"Nadine, you know I don't want to talk to anyone," I say nervously.
"It's Liz," she clarifies and hands me the phone. "She's on the 'okay' list, right?" Nadine smiles and walks away.
"Hey, Lizzie," I whisper.
"Hey," she answers softly. "How are you holding up?"
I quickly fill her in on my meeting with Laney and my family. I tell her about the Jaime interview too.
"I know all about it," Liz says once I'm finished.
"You do?"
"Yeah, Jaime just left my house," she tells me. "Laney asked me to go to bat for you, not that she needed to."
"You were interviewed?" I ask incredulously.
"Yep," Liz affirms. "I told Jaime what an amazing friend you are and how stretched you've been this past year. I told her how you've always wanted to go to a real school and how much you cared about Clark Hall and the friends you made there and even volunteered to be on the boring dance committee."
"I don't know what to say." I feel so lucky to have Liz. "Unfortunately, I think you're the only friend I have left at that place. Well, you and Principal P."
"Don't forget us," someone says softly.
"Who said that?" I ask, freaked out.
"It's Beth."
"And Allison."
I pause, nonplussed. "But, I figured ..."
"We were mad at first -- especially at Liz," Allison explains.
"That's for sure," I hear Liz mutter.
"But we also felt really bad about what happened with Sky," Beth adds. "What she did was so wrong. We had to defend you!"
Wow. "I'm so sorry I lied." My voice cracks. "I hope you believe me when I say that I truly care about our friendship."
"It's okay, Kaitlin," Allison assures me. "Liz told us the whole story." She pauses. "God, it feels weird not to call you Rachel!" Everyone laughs.
"Rachel, Kaitlin," Beth concludes, "the point is, whoever you are, we really like you." Beth might never believe it, but that genuine, unguarded statement is one of the nicest compliments I've ever received.
Laney motions to me from across the room and taps her platinum watch. The camera crew is ready to take some supplemental shots. They want footage of me sitting at the breakfast table reading Variety, me walking in the garden with Matt, me practicing my lines. Moments that make me appear more real to the viewer.
"I really like you guys, too," I tell them, motioning to Laney that I'm wrapping up.
"I just hope you'll forgive me as well," Allison says quietly.
"What for?" I watch a cameraman move a light closer to the deep green velour chair Jaime will be sitting on across from me.
"For those Kaitlin remarks I made," she explains.
"You didn't know it was me," I tell her. "And besides, I had it coming. I just hope we can still be friends."
"We are friends," Beth assures me. "You can't get rid of us that easily!"
"But if you want to lavish us with gifts -- or get me a date with Trevor Wainright -- that's okay too," Allison jokes.
"Deal," I laugh. I bite my lip. "Have any of you spoken to Austin?" I have to ask.
"No," Liz answers reluctantly. "He won't take any of our calls."
I respond to Laney's frantic emotions to let her know I'm hanging up. "One problem at a time, right?" I try to sound positive.
"That's right," Beth replies firmly.
"Good luck, Kates," Liz says. "Call us afterwards."
I hang up the phone and make my way over to the cameraman who is taking the background footage. Fifteen minutes later, we walk back into the living room to do the main interview. Mom, Dad, Matt, Laney, Rodney, and Nadine are busy talking animatedly to Jaime. For a moment, I feel warm and fuzzy inside just looking at them all. As crazy as my entourage makes me feel sometimes, I know they have my back when it really counts.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Kaitlin," Jaime says huskily in her trademark southern drawl. Jaime looks even better in person than she does on TV (isn't that always true?). Her usual prim newscaster attire has been replaced with jeans and a coral sweater set, and her long light brown hair is neatly tied in a loose ponytail.
"It's a pleasure to meet you." I shake her hand and smile warmly. "Thank you for coming."
"Well, thank you for bringing your story to me first," she answers. "Are you ready?" Someone from Jaime's crew wires me with a mic, and I nod my head. Jaime smiles and takes a seat on the green chair across from the couch I'm sitting on.
"If at any time you want to stop, or you need to take a sip of mineral water, just say so," Jaime tells me. "Okay then, let's get started." She cues the cameraman standing behind her and he begins to record.
Jaime throws me some slow balls at first. She asks about my years on FA, my movie career, and my family life. As we talk, I block out everyone standing around me and focus on Jaime's questions and the answers I rehearsed with Laney.
"If you were so happy, then why pretend to be someone else? "Jaime finally asks the million-dollar question.
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. Then I start to describe my fascination with a normal life. "I guess everyone wants what they don't have," I begin slowly. "I have a career people would kill for, but I wanted to see what it would be like to be a regular teen."
Jaime nods. "So you hatched a plan to go to high school in disguise."
I tell Jaime how burnt out I was and how obsessed I was with meeting people who didn't care if my movie opened at number one at the box office. "When your face is on the front of a Cheerios box, it's hard to do that without being followed everywhere you go. I knew if I wanted to see what high school was like, I had to do it without the press knowing. That's when my friend Liz and I came up with the disguise."
"Didn't you think people would be upset if they found out?" Jaime asks. I reflect for a moment, taking a sip of my water to help my dry throat. I stare at the reflection in the gold mirror behind Jaime of the waterfall that cascades into our kidney-shaped swimming pool in the middle of the garden.
"It was a perfect plan, until I actually walked through Clark Hall's doors," I reply. "I never meant to hurt a soul. But from the minute I walked into my first class, I slowly realized my fantasy was just that. High school isn't a fairy tale. Really, it's no different from Hollywood. I thought hanging out with regular teens would mean no more backstabbing or bickering. But I learned high school has those problems too." I look over at Nadine and Laney. They're beaming at each other. A rare sight for sure.
"How so?" Jaime prods, fingering the emerald pendant dangling from her neck. It's a good question, and I turn it over in my mind for a few moments.
"You can't hide from your problems." I shrug my shoulders, admitting that I don't really have the answer. I settle deeper into the striped throw pillows on the couch. "Girls will be girls, no matter where they are. We hate someone else just because she's different from us." I think of Lori. "I've realized that there are always going to be people who are jealous of you and make you feel badly -- whether you're in high school, Hollywood, or someplace else."
"So was it worth it then -- to put your career on the line for a few months of anonymity?" Jaime asks.
>
I look at Mom and Dad, who are studying me closely. Matt is leaning forward in his chair, hands on the knees of his pre-ripped jeans. Nadine is practically chewing off her fingernails. Meanwhile, Laney looks as cool as a cucumber. "Yes and no," I answer slowly. "Clark Hall was a vacation for me. I met some amazing friends and got to make real high school memories." I pause. "But going to Clark didn't help me escape my problems. It only created more of them.
"Instead of embracing who I really am -- a teen actress who loves her job despite the occasional drama and lack of vacations -- I dragged a whole school into my mess. I went into hiding. I should have faced those tabloid rumors about Sky and me, instead of lying about them." My voice rises with confidence. "And I should have demanded a little R and R instead of overextending myself and then complaining about it after the fact. I should have come clean to my fans a lot earlier." I breathe deeply and grin. "As I'm talking to you, I can feel the weight lifting from my shoulders."
"That's great, Kaitlin," Jaime says, a little distractedly. "But are you saying the rumors about you and Sky are true then?" She motions for her cameraman to come in closer for an emotional headshot.
I think of Sky's behavior this past year. "It's true that we don't always get along," I admit. It's nerve-racking to be so honest for the first time. "But you can't tell me you like everyone you work with either," I add. Jaime's hazel eyes sparkle with amusement. I choose my next words carefully. "That doesn't mean I'm not professional. I love working at FA and just because my life there has its challenges doesn't mean that I hate being there. I'm grateful every day for the chance to be on a hit show.
"Sky's done some things that have really upset me. We're not close, but that doesn't mean we throw tantrums, like you read in the gossips. It just means that we don't hang out outside work. And it means that I won't be sharing a dressing room with her anytime soon." We both laugh.
"I interviewed your friends earlier," Jaime tells me, leaning forward and smiling. "They had wonderful things to say about you. Even the ones you misled."
