A Moment for Us
Page 20
“Two days?” I ask again.
Alex shoots daggers at Oliver. “I wanted to tell you, but it all happened very fast. I got offered a permanent position as the lead architect for a building overseas. It’s a huge opportunity, but I wasn’t going to take it because I didn’t want to leave you guys hanging with the resort. But Stella found out about it and called me to basically demand I do it.”
“Did she?” he asks leaning forward.
“I did too,” I speak up, knowing that Grayson will back off a little.
Alex raises an eyebrow at me because I didn’t push him, but I would’ve.
“You knew?”
I nod. “I think everyone but you knew he’d been offered the spot. We just didn’t know he accepted it or that he’d be leaving so soon.”
Gray stands and starts to pace. “How are you going to leave while we’re building the Firefly?”
“Because he doesn’t need to be here for us to do this.” I place my hand on Alex’s shoulder. “He helped, and we’re able to take it from here. This is your dream, and it’s ours now as well, but Alex has the right to follow his, and we know it’s not here in Willow Creek.”
His head drops, and he lets out a long sigh. “I didn’t know. You didn’t tell me that you didn’t want this.”
Alex moves toward him. “I didn’t know I didn’t. I still don’t. I want to take this project. I want to leave here and see what life is like doing what I love.”
Grayson might be stunned, but we’re family, and we all want each other to be happy. “Then you should go. You shouldn’t be stuck here if there’s something else you want. This resort was never meant to be a prison.”
I smile. “I agree. We can handle things, and besides, it’s not like Oliver is doing anything. He can take on more work.”
“Right, I’m just living on the property and making sure things run smoothly. And . . . booked our first wedding. You’re welcome.”
“You booked a wedding? We don’t even have floors in!” I groan. I swear, sometimes he just doesn’t think.
“It’s for a year out. Calm your tits. I explained we’re new and offered her a great deal.”
“You offered her . . .” I trail off as I get control of my anger.
Grayson laughs. “So, you booked a wedding before we’re even open with a bride who was okay booking a venue sight unseen?”
“She’s an old friend from college, and she remembered I’m in the hospitality business. It seemed perfect. We’ll be fully booked with her wedding, and it gives us someone who isn’t going to expect perfection. It’ll be a great test run.”
I bite back a scoff. What bride doesn’t expect perfection at her wedding?
“I might come back just for this.” Alex laughs.
Grayson glares at them both. “I swear, you’re both pains in the asses.”
“This is true,” Ollie says, kicking his feet up on the coffee table. “But you’re stuck with us. Oh, and, Josh?”
“Yeah?”
“Stella was on board, so this is what life is like with twins.”
That’s what I am worried about.
Double the trouble.
After her brunch, she ran some errands and did some shopping with her mom, which allowed Stella to come over and actually decorate the nursery. I’m anxiously waiting for her to get home. An hour passes, and I see her car pull up the driveway. I head out to help with the bags.
“Hey.”
“Hey,” Delia says, not sounding like herself.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m tired, and I think I ate too much. My stomach is tight, and the babies are kicking and moving a lot. I don’t know, it’s just been a long day.”
“You were gone all day.”
She nods. “We got a lot done, but I’m just . . . blah. I’m getting bigger, feeling more bloated too. I’m sure it’s all par for the course and will only get worse.”
“Maybe the doctor will have some suggestions.”
Delia shrugs. “Maybe. I’ll ask Dr. Locke when I go in for my next appointment.”
This will be the first appointment that I miss. I’m really not happy about it, but I can’t miss the meeting with the bank. “You’re sure you’ll be fine without me?”
“Yes, I am sure. It’s just a routine monthly check. I promise, I’ll be fine.”
“I can ask to reschedule with the bank.”
“No, you can’t,” Delia says with exasperation. “You’re not going to change a meeting that you have to be at.”
“I don’t like not being there.”
“And I appreciate that, but it’s an appointment, not the birth. I promise that it’ll be fine, and I’ll call you once it’s done and tell you what they said.”
“Fine,” I relent and grab the bags from the trunk, holding them in one hand, and press my palm to her back. “Why don’t you put your feet up when we get inside?”
“I want to see the nursery first,” she says with a little perk to her voice.
As much as I’d like to argue with her, I know better. There’s nothing that will stop her from appeasing her curiosity. “Then you’ll relax?”
She grins. “Yes. Then I’ll go lie down and let you take care of me.”
I kiss her temple. “Good.”
We walk to the door of the nursery, and I push it open, feeling a wave of nerves. I think she’ll like it, but I don’t know.
Delia’s gasp tells me all I need to know. We did all right.
The room is painted light gray and the cribs are positioned with the window between them. On the right will be our son’s side. The bedding is all set up and looks far better than I could have done it. Stella found rustic antlers, which she had made into the shape of a P, and we hung that above his crib. I was really not sure we should since Delia may want the babies to have her last name, but Stella insisted, saying that if that were the case, it would be easy enough to change it.
It’s very hard to argue with her when she uses logic.
It really is perfect though. His side is masculine but not so much so that it’s obnoxious. The furniture that Mrs. Andrews bought is a dark gray wood and finishes off that side.
Opposite of that is our daughter’s side. Here is where my sister went ridiculous. Her furniture is a whitewashed wood that has gray undertones that are feminine. Above her bed is a white canopy that makes the space soft. She had paper flowers made that go above the crib, and she said we’ll add an initial once we know her name.
“This is . . . this is incredible,” Delia says before taking a step inside. “I can’t believe how perfect it is.”
“I’m glad,” I say with a smile. “I was a little worried.”
“Why?”
“I just was. You didn’t really give us any direction.”
“I didn’t really know how to do it, but this is better than I could’ve imagined.” She kisses me. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Lovingly, she runs her hand along the bedding that’s hanging over the edge of the crib. She’s in front of the antlers staring up at the letter above our son’s side. “For Parkerson?”
My chest tightens. “Stella had it made. I really didn’t know what you’d want, but we can always take it down.”
Delia’s eyes turn soft. “We haven’t really talked about it.”
“No, we haven’t, and I don’t need to.”
She sits in the rocking chair and her hands move to her belly. “We should.”
I release a deep breath, steeling myself against whatever decision she is going to make. We’re not married. This wasn’t planned, and if she doesn’t want the twins to be Parkersons, well, I can’t say I would blame her. My family name isn’t something we’re all very proud of at the moment.
“We can wait,” I assure her. When she’s really ready to talk, we can.
“Josh, I want the babies to have your last name.”
I look up, surprised she said that. “You’re sure?”
>
“Of course, I’m sure.”
“But we’re not married.”
“That’s true, but it feels right.”
“I love you,” I say as I take her face in my hands. “So fucking much.”
“I’m glad.”
I smile and then kiss her lips. “So, you like the room?”
“I love it.”
“Now that we have last names, we should start thinking of first names.”
She grins. “I agree. Do you have any favorites?”
I hadn’t really thought too much about it. The babies have been sort of abstract for me. I know they’re in there, but until I felt them move, it was hard to think of them as real. Now, it’s all becoming very real. We have furniture, decorations, and some clothes. We’re five and a half months into this, and her baby shower is in a little over a month.
“I really don’t. You?”
She purses her lips. “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t.”
“Okay, what are your choices, maybe I’ll like them.”
“Yeah right.” She scoffs. “You are never that easy. Let’s remember the bedding . . .”
“That was you.”
“I knew what I wanted.”
“You also wouldn’t pick. I was fine with anything,” I remind her.
I would’ve picked pink for the boy if it meant we were done.
Delia wraps her arms around my middle. “Fine. It’s a bit weird, but for a girl, I like the name Gina. My father’s name was Gene, and it felt like a good compromise for using a part of his name. And then for a boy I like Everett.”
I let them sink in, and honestly, I really like them. Everett sounds like a strong name, and I can picture a little girl named Gina with blonde hair swaying as she runs around the house.
“I’m not just saying this, but I think they might just be perfect.”
“Really?” Delia asks, her eyes wide.
“Yeah. I really like Everett. And I know how much you love your dad, and I also know your mother would probably love having your father’s name honored that way.”
“If you hadn’t liked Gina, my second choice was Brynlee. I know they’re a bit different, but that was just my idea.”
“Let’s put that as our backup.”
Her smile is bright enough to light up the night sky. “Okay. Do you have anything you like?”
“I’ll think about it and let you know, but for now, we’ll create a list.”
She rests her head on my chest as we stand in the nursery where our babies will sleep. I never imagined my life would be here. That I’d be holding the woman who I love and naming our children. It’s different, amazing, and I am eternally grateful that things turned out this way.
Delia changed everything, and I’ll never be able to give her the things she’s given me, but I’ll never stop trying.
Chapter 33
Delia
I’m sitting at the edge of the exam table, waiting for the nurse to come in. I’ve already gotten two text messages from Josh, requesting I text him as soon as I’m out of the appointment so he knows I’m fine. He’s so crazy, but I love him for it.
Today is a big day for him. The family had enough money to get the build done, but they decided to take out a loan in order to keep some cash on hand. Josh has been working so hard to get a deal closed because, while the siblings may have a lot of knowledge, they don’t have anything proving their experience to the bank. Everything was done through their father’s name before, and they’re a risk to loan money to.
But Jack worked up the numbers to show they are worth the investment. I have faith.
The nurse enters with a warm smile. “Hi, Delia. I’m Aly, and I’m going to do your vitals and see if we can hear the heartbeats before Dr. Locke comes in.”
“Great.”
She takes my vitals and asks me a series of questions. “How is your sleep?”
“It’s fine. I feel them a lot more at night.”
“I have two, and I remember trying to fall asleep and they’d be doing somersaults.”
I nod. “The last two days they’ve been a little less active.”
“Yeah?”
“Last night especially. That’s normal, right?”
Aly grabs the doppler. “You’ll definitely have times when they’re more active than not. Let’s see if we can hear them.”
She sets it up, and we hear something almost right away. I smile at the sound. It’s still mesmerizing, and I can understand why Josh wants to be here, it’s really special. “That’s one of them, I’m going to press around to see if we can get the other to let us hear.”
Her hands push around, shifting things, and I feel one of them push back. “Seems he or she isn’t happy.”
“Definitely.” She moves it around more, focusing. “Twins are so hard some days. I’m going to grab the ultrasound machine to get a peek. One will often hide behind the other, and the doppler isn’t always the best way.”
“Is everything okay?” I ask, my nerves spiking.
Aly’s hand rests on my shoulder. “I promise, this is totally normal with multiples. I’ll grab Sara, our ultrasound tech, and be right back.”
I release a heavy sigh. “Okay.”
She heads out of the room, and I do everything I can to relax. She returns quickly with the tech and the ultrasound machine.
“All right, I’m going to take a peek, and then we’ll get Dr. Locke in here,” Sara says.
“Sounds great.”
When she presses the wand to my stomach, I don’t see much on the screen, just a lot of blurry objects as Sara clicks buttons. The sound of one of the twins’ heartbeats keeps a steady rhythm, and after a few minutes, she sets the transducer down and smiles. “All done. I’m going to grab the doctor and let her know you’re ready to see her.”
“Was everything okay?” I ask Aly.
“I’m sure it is. We’ll have Dr. Locke look it over and then someone will be in.”
“Okay, thank you.”
Aly smiles. “Of course. Sit tight.” She exits the room, and I grab my phone, sending a text off to Jessica.
* * *
Me: How many ultrasounds did you have?
Jess: A lot because we were worried about Ember from the fire.
* * *
That’s right. I’d forgotten about that.
* * *
Me: They just did another one, and I’m just wondering if it’s normal.
Jess: I’m sure it’s fine. They once had an issue finding the heartbeat and did an ultrasound.
Me: Gah! That’s what we’re doing now. So, I shouldn’t worry?
* * *
I bite my thumbnail and try to calm myself. No one seems worried about anything. The technician said this is really common with twins.
* * *
Jess: No, don’t worry. Is Josh there?
Me: He has the bank meeting, and I didn’t want to reschedule since I have meetings the rest of the week.
Jess: Shit. I forgot that’s today. Grayson has been slammed and working so much that I can’t keep up.
* * *
There’s a knock at the door, and Dr. Locke peeks her head in.
* * *
Me: Doctor is here. I’ll text you later.
Jess: Love you.
* * *
I put my phone under my leg as she enters. “Hi, Delia.”
“Dr. Locke. It’s good to see you.”
“You too. Is Josh here with you?”
I shake my head. “No, he’s at work.”
Her blue eyes watch me as she sits in the chair. “I see. Is anyone here with you today?”
“Nope.”
“Okay, I just reviewed the videos from your ultrasound.” Her voice takes a different tone, and she moves closer to take my hand in hers. “I am so sorry to tell you this, but one of the twins doesn’t have a heartbeat.”
I shake my head, staring at her. “What?”
Her eyes turn soft. “I’m sorry, but we c
an’t find a heartbeat and there’s no movement.”
She’s wrong. She’s wrong and she’s lying. I start to shake and my chest aches. “No! No. That’s not possible. They were fine.”
Dr. Locke clears her throat. “This happens sometimes, usually much earlier in the pregnancy, but it does happen. I’m so sorry, but I personally reviewed it from several angles, and there is no heartbeat on the girl.”
My daughter. My little girl with the blonde hair and Josh’s eyes . . . gone.
I lost her.
Tears fill my vision, and I start to tremble. “I don’t understand. I’m not bleeding. I did everything right. Maybe it’s wrong. Maybe the machine just didn’t see it. She’s in there, and she’s alive.”
“I know this is hard, and you didn’t do anything wrong. Things sometimes look great and then suddenly they’re not. I really wish that it was different news I was telling you, but it’s not.”
I can’t stop shaking my head as the tears fall. “But I felt the baby kick. I felt it move. It was fine. You’re wrong. Please, you have to check again. We have a plan, and we’re going to have a little girl and a boy. We have names and a nursery.”
The doctor shifts the ultrasound machine closer and pulls up the recording Sara took. She moves the mouse around as my tears fall relentlessly. This isn’t possible. I can’t lose her. I can’t do this. How do I go through the rest of my pregnancy like this?
Dr. Locke opens the screen. “See that?”
There’s a steady flutter. “Yes.”
“That’s baby A, which is the boy. His heartbeat is regular, and you can see him moving around.” She moves the screen to a different image. “This is baby B, which was the girl. There’s nothing here.”
My eyes are riveted on the monitor, watching, waiting, and searching for anything. A tiny blip or a flinch, but there is nothing. No kick. No heartbeat. Nothing.
The tears fall, and I clutch my arms around my stomach, wanting to protect myself and the babies—baby in there. God, I lost one.