by Ines Johnson
Chen's hand went to the plant inside his robes.
Manu stared at him as though he could see the hope in Chen's eyes. "He is coming for you,” Manu sneered. "I remember your brother. He was unbalanced, arrogant like your father. When you go to the next life your brother will tear apart this universe." Manu's eyes were nearly as large as his head. "He will likely snap your mate's neck and then tear the crew apart by hand."
"Hsing would never do such a thing."
"You were ready to do such a thing to Ngai with the mere verbal threat of harm to your mate."
Chen didn’t want to believe it possible. Not of either of them. Not of any of his kind. Hsing was already so burdened. If they severed Chen from Hsing it would be the last thing he could stand.
Hsing had Shanti. Shanti would offer him balance. Though she could not offer Hsing balance if Manu and Ngai found the Mothership.
Chen knew what he had to do. He could not let Shanti and Hsing find him.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Hsing's hearts raced in his chest. They pounded a double rhythm of fear.
Something had itched at the back of his neck as he'd watched his brother and their mate descend down the heliopad. He'd tried to go back to his duties after their descent, but he couldn't leave his seat at the command deck.
He’d peered down as though he could see through the atmosphere on the Earth. Of course he couldn't see through the cloud cover, but he maintained a link to Chen. It grew heavier to hold the further his brother got away. His link to Shanti, which was a fragile connection when they were together, weakened the further away she got from him. Though she'd opened her body fully to him, she still kept a gate on her mind.
Hsing didn't worry over that. They had plenty of time to fully bond. In the meantime, he sat at the command deck and peered down, keeping watch.
The time ticked by and Hsing became more and more agitated. The only reason he stayed in his seat and on the ship was because he felt Chen, and through Chen he felt her. He knew his brother thought Shanti would not return.
Hsing harbored no such worry. She was theirs. And so he waited.
And waited.
Until he felt a snap. The snap crashed into his chest and thudded down into his gut. Something was wrong. He reached out for Chen and caught glimpses of darkness and disunity. He reached out for Shanti and all he felt was emptiness and solitude.
Dread flooded his mind, fear sang through his hearts. Without any further information, Hsing leaped onto the heliopad and beamed down.
He arrived at the coral reef. He searched around, but he didn't see either one of them. And then he heard it. Shanti's voice calling out to him from the bond.
Hsing closed his eyes until he saw where she was. He was there in no time. He arrived at a squat structure. It looked similar to the homes he'd seen in his mother's mind, only larger. Hsing bypassed the knob on the door and burst through. And there she sat.
Shanti flew into his arms. He folded her into himself.
"Help me," she said. "They took him."
Hsing pulled her away from him and studied her lips. Her words made little sense. Until he realized...where was Chen?
"They took him." She tried to say more words, but her speech failed her. Shanti grasped his hands. She clutched them to her chest. She closed her eyes and showed him. And then Hsing saw.
Two of the Marred Ones held Chen in their grasp. One turned their eye on Shanti. Hsing's hearts stopped at the possibility that they could've taken her.
But they hadn't. Chen struggled and diverted all of their attention back to him. But now Chen was gone.
"Help me find him," Shanti pleaded. "I can't live without him."
She did not understand how true that was. Shanti was more attached to Chen than she was to him. Hsing knew he'd become unbalanced without his brother at his side. But he'd sink into madness like the Marred Ones without both Shanti and Chen.
They had to find Chen.
Hsing closed his eyes, opened his spirit, and reached out for his brother. "I cannot see him." Darkness engulfed the link he shared with his twin.
"What if you touched Nirvana?" Shanti unbuttoned the cloth that covered her chest. "You get a boost of power, right?"
Hsing covered her hands with his, stopping her motions. The fear in her eyes punched him in his gut. But she had a point. "Open yourself to me, Shanti."
"Okay. Do we need to go to the bedroom?"
Hsing put his hands on her face. "No, little one. There is no time for that. I need you to let me into your soul."
"How? How do I do that?"
Hsing took her hands in his own. "Breathe," he said. "Calm your mind. Let me in."
She was a mass of nervous energy. Her thoughts ran in every direction.
Hsing leaned down and kissed her lips. Slowly her mind focused on him. He poured everything he felt into her. He showed her his emotions at the loss of his parents, the weight of responsibility for his tribe on his shoulders, how much care he had for his brother, and his growing care for her.
Shanti gasped and broke the kiss, staring into his open eyes. Hsing tried to shutter himself, but failed. He turned from her.
He'd never been so open and vulnerable in his entire lifetime, not even for his brother. His instinct was to distance himself from her. He couldn't make her unsee what she saw deep inside him. In that moment he understood the power a female mate held over her males. She could cause him more damage than any adversary.
"I can see him," she said.
Hsing turned back to her. "Show me."
He reached out his hand to her. Shanti offered him her hand and then opened herself completely. Her mind's eye was fuzzy, but in the haze they both saw Chen. They couldn't make him out clearly. He appeared to be slumped over and in pain.
"Chen," Shanti said out loud, but Hsing heard it ring in his head. "Chen we're coming."
Shanti wrenched out of his grasp and headed for the door.
"Let's go,” she said.
Hsing blinked. "You are not going anywhere. You will stay here until I find him and bring him back."
"No. If he dies, we die with him."
"No. You will live. You can stay here and live a full life. You can choose another male, a human one. And stay on your planet."
"I don't want anyone else. I don't want to be anywhere else."
Hsing knew these words were not for him. They were for Chen. Though he had no doubts that Shanti's body yearned for his, Chen was the one her heart yearned for.
"Either we come back with Chen,” she said. “Or we don't come back at all."
Chapter Twenty-Three
Shanti rested her head against Hsing's chest. Her body felt exhausted. She thought she heard the sound of two heartbeats. She thought she felt two beats on different parts of her cheek.
"Yes, I have two hearts." Hsing wrapped his arms around her and the world fell away from them.
"Is that what makes your kind go crazy? Because you love twice as hard?"
His sharp inhale drowned the sounds of his hearts. "The process of circulating liquid through the body differs from circulating pure energy. Love is a concept in the mind, not the circulatory system."
It was an explanation she would've given a few days ago. Love wasn't real, it was made up. But that was before she'd met Chen and he'd burned himself into her single heart, made it beat twice as fast whenever he was near.
Chen loved her and she knew that was real. She knew it in her mind, her body, and her soul. She felt the same way about him.
Hsing didn't love her. He tolerated her. But that was okay. She enjoyed the way he tolerated her.
And, if she was honest with herself, his pushing and prodding her to walk her talk was making a difference in her life. Both of these brothers were making a difference in her life, which is why she now knew for certain she wanted to spend her life with them.
Shanti looked away from the male that looked so much like the one who loved her, the one she loved in return. She lo
oked away from Hsing, but she didn't let him go.
She let Hsing be her strength, her anchor. She knew that, although he didn't love her, he would never let anything happen to her. He’d never let any harm befall her.
It was barely a breath before they were on the heliopad and beaming up. Shanti looked down to see the Earth falling away from her, out of her reach. She felt something feather-light running down the side of her face. She assumed it was a tear from her worries over Chen.
It wasn't. It was a hand. Hsing's hand.
The gentleness of the movement caught her off guard. Her heart stuttered, sounding as though there were two organs inside her chest.
"I will bring him home to you, little one."
Shanti turned her head into the cradle of Hsing's large hand, and wonder of wonders, he let her. He guided her head back to his beating hearts and allowed her to rest there. A sense of safety, security washed over her.
Shanti had been fiercely independent her entire life. She'd never allowed herself to lean on anyone. Now, she allowed all of her weight to rest on the strong post of Hsing.
Hsing's arms tightened around her. Shanti felt herself lifted off the ground. They were still moving, not up but forward. There was no longer the whooshing stream of air sounding in her ears from the heliopad. She heard words, shouts. They were in the lyrical tongue of the Eloheem. Somehow, she understood every one of them.
"Pakua, follow these coordinates. It appears their ship was stationed in the western hemisphere of the Womb Rock.”
Shanti looked up to see the dark purple Yin, Pakua, nod and punch in coordinates at the command center. There were other Eloheem around her, including Niao who looked at her with wide, teary eyes.
"I am sorry, Shanti," the little boy said into her mind.
Shanti tried to step away from Hsing, but he held her firm. He peered down into her face, searching her eyes. Shanti opened her mouth to speak, to tell him she was okay, that she just wanted to go to Niao and comfort him.
Before she could open her mouth, Hsing nodded. With a squeeze of her hand, followed by a fleeting brush of his lips on her temple, he released her. He set her on her feet. Then he walked past her, barking urgent orders.
Shanti stood still for a moment. Her legs felt wobbly without him. She took a deep breath to steady herself and then she made her way over to Niao. The young child wouldn't meet her eyes when she knelt down to be on his level.
"Niao?"
"It is my fault." His lips trembled. "My father took Chen-Na from us. He wants to send us to the next life so that he will be free of any link. He will use Chen-Na to accomplish his goals."
Shanti wanted to dispute what the child was saying, but something in her knew it was true. She looked over to Hsing. His eyes were trained on her and Niao; a shadow crossed his stern face. It seemed to sink down his neck, over his shoulders.
Shanti stood, unable to stand the thought of the darkness going any further into Hsing. She turned to Niao and squeezed his hand. "We're going to find him."
Niao nodded, a light of hope in his eyes.
Shanti turned and made her way to Hsing. Without thinking, she reached out to him. Her hand met brick when it touched his shoulder. "We're going to find him," Shanti repeated the words to Hsing.
Hsing didn't answer her verbally or psychically. He clenched his jaw and then he shrugged off her hand and went to the command console. He all but shoved Pakua from the seat and took the controls. The ship lurched under his hand. Everyone reached out for stability.
A blip came onto what looked like a radar screen.
"There they are," Pakua said.
Shanti felt the ship accelerate. She watched the screen. They were going faster, but the distance between them and the dot on the screen seemed to get larger and larger. And then it went out of sight completely.
Hsing smashed his fists against the console. No one spoke. Everyone looked at him with large eyes as though he were about to burst. Or worse, go insane.
"Hsing?" Shanti's voice was low when she spoke.
He didn't respond. He ran his hand over the nodes atop his head.
"Hsing," she tried again. This time she called out to him from within. She knew he heard her when he sighed. "Hsing, come here. I need you."
He closed his eyes for a long moment. She didn't think he would come. Finally, he rose.
"Stay the course," he said to Pakua, relinquishing the command center.
Hsing preceded Shanti out of the room.
"I have to get off this ship," he said. "When they sever him from me, I will go mad."
"He's not dead. We'd feel it if he were, wouldn't we?"
"It is my duty to protect everyone. They left me in charge."
"Hsing, we can still find him. We just have to-"
"I will kill you with my bare hands. I will come to you first because you live in my very soul. That is what happened to my Yin father. He took my mother’s life after the Draconians severed my Yang father from them. They destroyed everything good about themselves.”
Shanti felt a chill run through her blood. It originated in the link she shared with Hsing.
“My Yin father, Chou, told me of this vision before he died. He didn’t know what to make of it. The thought was unfathomable. But it is what happened.” Hsing hung his head. His body looked as though it was caving in on itself.
Shanti wanted to reach out to him, but feared he would walk away from her.
“I may be the one in charge, but Chen is the best of both of us. And you...you are bringing out the best in me." Hsing's eyes gazed over her. He was open and vulnerable.
The weight surrounding him felt stifling to Shanti. She'd never shouldered another person's burden. She’d never gotten close enough to anyone to hold their hand.
Shanti wrapped her arms around Hsing's broad shoulders. When she did she felt them shaking.
"They are hurting him, Shanti. Can you feel it? I can feel his pain."
She did feel Chen’s pain. She felt both of their pain.
Hsing’s head rose to meet her gaze. His large eyes were filled with torment. “You have to get away from me, little one."
But he did not pull away from her. He seemed to slump deeper into her embrace.
"You need to forgive yourself, Hsing. You take responsibility for everything and you won't let anyone shoulder the burden. Your parents left you with an awesome task and you did better than anyone could've expected. You have nothing to feel ashamed for."
Shanti had trouble keeping the irony out of her voice. She could've been telling her own life story. Her own parents, though they loved her, had left her to her own devices at such a young age. They’d given her far more independence than she was ready for, and she'd never learned to share any of her own burdens either.
"Since the moment I met you," she continued, "you've told me that I don't know my own mind. And you were right. I didn't. But you always knew. You know me and you know yourself. You don't want to hurt anyone. I don't believe that you will. We're your family."
Hsing swallowed. There was still doubt tensed in the corded muscles of his shoulders, but he was listening to her.
"I know that you care about each being on this ship,” Shanti continued. “Chen said there's power in humbleness. Admit that you can't do this alone. Let me help you, Hsing. Let us all help you."
Hsing rested his coned head against hers. Shanti placed her hands on his shoulders again. They were still hard, but now there was some give. Hsing leaned into her. His weight was heavy, but Shanti took as much as she could bear.
And then she heard it.
They heard it.
Hsing opened his eyes wide and blinked at her. "Can you hear him?"
Shanti nodded. Her heart raced, and then her anger boiled. "Don't worry. Once we get him back, I'll kill him myself."
In unison, they both turned and marched down the hall. Chen had sent them a message down the bond link. A message they both intended to ignore.
"Let me go,
" he'd said to them.
Like hell they would.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chen touched the plant specimen in his robes. He felt the organism search his skin for the toxins it craved, but there was none on his person. Chen was pure, uncorrupted energy.
Chen could tell that Ngai was not stable in his mind. He may have had his plan to use Chen and his link as a homing beacon, but not if Chen extinguished the beacon first. Not if he took his own life and ensured the safety of everyone he held dear.
When Eloh males went peacefully into the world after, the separation was not drastic. Hsing would survive it and remain whole with Shanti by his side. It was a great and terrible sacrifice, but one Chen was prepared to make.
Chen closed his eyes. In his mind's eye he saw the faces of his parents on the last day of their lives. His Yang father had told his sons of a vision, an incomprehensible vision of his death. They'd left their children, knowing they might never return.
Chen had always remembered the looks on their faces to be ones of sadness. But now he realized they were of steel. Their sacrifice was so that their children would live.
There was sadness in Chen's hearts. A deep ache that he would not get to touch Shanti's lips to his again. A hollowness that he would no longer stand beside his brother to offer support. On the surface of his mind sat despair that the plant would not make it to the Mothership to save the rest of his tribe. But surely once Chen was gone, and the Marred Ones on their way, Hsing would return to the Earth to gather another specimen.
Hsing would not fall to the way of the Marred Ones. His brother was strong, more importantly their mate was stronger. And Hsing was on the Mothership, surrounded by those who would care for and support him. If they came after the Marred Ones, who knows who would get harmed.
Any more casualties aboard the Mothership could cause the Eloheem brothers to turn on each other. If they turned on each other than Shanti would get hurt. If Shanti got hurt, Hsing would well and truly go mad. Then there would be no one from their tribe left.
