"You're correct," Atticus noted. "However, their mindset has changed, and they want to help you, Alisha. Trust isn't my strong suit. I know it's not yours either, but Phoenix and I are confident that they wish you well and are just waiting for you to let them in."
"What if I'm scared to do just that?" I questioned. "What if I fear that the moment I let each of them in and discover their traits, something will happen, and I'll lose it all once again? Then we're back to square one."
"Does living in fear help you move forward?" he questioned back. "Fear stems from your worries of something you can't predict, sweetheart. Every action we take changes our path in this world, some for the better, others for the worse. Regardless, fearing what can happen tomorrow, next week, or a year from now isn't going to deliver the answers you seek. It won't help build memories, relationships, or yourself. Instead, it hinders you, bringing you to a standstill, and only you can be the one to break that cycle and strive forward."
He lifted my chin to look into my eyes. "You are the conductor of this symphony, and it's your movement in life that determines how your future unravels into the present, and how something becomes part of your past.”
His head lowered, and he kissed me softly. "You can't lose your memories again when you have a block on your mind. Therefore, as of now, your amnesia can't get any worse. Even when your memories are restored, it won't erase what you've gained within these walls. Does that give you a little more reassurance?"
"Yes," I whispered. "Are...you sure it's okay for me to get to know them?"
He slowly nodded, his jealousy not as prominent as before.
"As much as I hate sharing, they've proven themselves as individuals that want the best for you. It'll take time for me to accept them, but as long as they treat you with the respect and love you deserve, they'll have no problems with me."
"Okay." I relaxed against him once more. "Having company may help a little."
"We'll figure it out this week. However, promise me you'll get lots of rest, stay hydrated, and eat regularly. When you're out of balance in those three departments, especially with lack of sleep, it never ends well."
"That's comforting to know."
"How so?"
"If I want to go on a killing spree, I'll just ensure one of those areas is lacking."
"You frighten me at times," he concluded but kissed my forehead.
* * *
Since then, Atticus tried to be there to hold me through the nights, and on the occasions where he had to deal with matters outside the prison, Kai, Titus, or Blaze would do a night shift to watch me.
It seemed that as long as they were in the same room as me, my nightmares stayed far away. It was when I was by myself that the triggering reminder of my death showed its ugly head.
Everything had been fine until all four of them and Lyla had to deal with a serious problem outside. I don't know if the situation had to do with my case or something bigger that was catching loads of attention, but they had been gone for three days, and so I was an emotional mess of nightmares, using coffee to keep me awake.
"Do you want me to escort you back to your level, Alisha?" Kitty questioned. "You don't look well at all."
"I'm fine, Kitty. It's best you head back to your cell. It's a mandatory inspection day. We all have to be on our best behavior seeing as another set of new prisoners is arriving."
The mention of the next set of prisoners made me recall the day I'd arrived here and how unclean it was.
If that was what health inspectors approved of in a place like this, I prayed for anyone living in the quiet rooms filled with mold, debris, and other bacteria that would only contribute to a shorter life span.
"Are you sure? Should I get you water? Tea? Coffee? Flu medicine?"
Her worry made me smirk as I closed my eyes and pressed my fingers to my temple. "Nothing for now, Kitty. Return to your cell. I can make it back to Level Three with ease. Do not worry about me," I encouraged, patting her head with my free hand.
The action was one of the few times I’d tried to show the cat shifter compassion.
In the last two weeks she'd been my main servant. I could trust her with my life, versus the other two that were there to help deliver my food either at the underground cafeteria or in the private chambers of my room.
My stance of power from two weeks ago was still circulating in the whispering halls of the prison, but I couldn’t care less about anyone's opinion of me. All they spoke about was my potential monarch status, their fear of being close to me, and their curiosity regarding my masters.
All I wished for was some much-needed rest. Maybe that would help with this pounding headache that had been assaulting me for hours on end. My instincts have been telling me to go back to my room for hours now, but here I was, remaining in my seat.
"Okay. If you need me, please don't hesitate to call for me," Kitty reassured me. She remained where she stood, even though her words insinuated that she'd be making her exit.
"Will she be okay? Why am I afraid to leave her? She's a monarch, though. I don't want to go against her wishes...but…I should take care of her. I should, but then I also have that meeting with the Commander about my status. I can't miss it. What to do? Would Alisha be mad with a hug? Whenever I gave my mom a hug she'd feel better. Is that childish at eighteen now? Mom, I wish you were here to help me out. Alisha's a really nice friend of mine."
Her worried thoughts drifted into my mind, something that didn't happen.
It must be due to this damn headache.
"Kitty?"
"Yes!" She stood up straight, waiting for my next order.
"I feel like having a hug," I admitted. "I've heard it brings good karma your way when you're ill."
"It does!" She beamed before she cleared her throat. "I used to hug my mom whenever she wasn't feeling well, and it helped. I'd be happy to do the same for Alisha!"
I slid out of my seat to get up and outstretched my arms in time for Kitty's hug.
"Feel better, Alisha," she cheered.
"I will, Kitty," I replied. "Can already feel the boost."
"That gives me reassurance," she whispered into my black shirt. "Please get better, Alisha."
We pulled apart and I mustered the best uplifting expression I could, enough to give Kitty some peace of mind. Now that I knew she had other worries to deal with, I didn't want to add to that list of annoyances in this place.
We exchanged goodbyes, and I stared at the door for a few seconds.
"I should...go." My voice was shaky, and even with my obvious acknowledgment that I needed to leave, I lowered back to my seat and placed my head on the desk.
"Fuck. Why do I have to be sick? I should have stopped myself from coming today. Fuck mandatory shit. Fuck the rules. Fuck everything."
My mind was drifting once again, but a jolt surged me awake. I sat up, my eyes darting around the room in caution, but my spiked heart rate soon calmed when I realized no one was here.
"We need to leave."
I was taken aback by the voice in my mind, only to realize it was Freya.
"Freya?" I questioned out loud, my voice barely audible. "Ugh. My head hurts so bad."
"Outside sources are the cause of that," she revealed. "I'm going to guide you to where I think we'll get out of this with only a few scratches."
"That doesn't sound pleasant at all."
I took some inhales and let them out slowly, noticing how sweaty my forehead was and how heightened the lights in the room were.
Wait. Did you say this isn't our fault?
"Trap." That was all she said as a calm warmth ran through me. "Allow me some control. I can't stay long without harming you, but I can stay long enough to get you out of the original mess they desire for us."
The reigns are yours.
The sudden appearance of Freya warned me that we were in deep shit. Atticus had explained Freya was one of few words. If she had a problem, she used her fists to solve it.
She h
adn't made a debut since her last appearance, which only emphasized our new threatening dilemma. A thrumming boost dimmed the intense drumming happening in my head, and I gave Freya the control she needed to get us out of the room.
The change of atmosphere was extremely noticeable, as if I was suddenly taking a massive inhale of fresh air. The previous dread of moving was replaced with a level of urgency to get further away from this place.
With Freya in control of my movement, we moved swiftly through the halls of the second floor. My mental state was growing sharper by the second as the instinctive feeling of being watched hovered over me.
Definitely a trap. Why though?
"Someone isn't pleased with your current ownership," Freya calmly answered. "A man we've yet to meet. Personally, I see no need for such tactics, but this will make things a little exciting and buy some time."
How do you know?
"I love to listen to all that's spoken of when you're in deep slumber," she revealed. "I'm sure your mate stated this on purpose while you were sleeping, in hopes I'd pick up on it, which I did."
What did I miss then?
This was all new and a little hard to grasp in the heat of this moment, but knowledge was power, and it could give me a clue of how to defend myself when all my allies weren't present.
We turned a sharp corner, and I was confused as to where this next path would lead us to. The first half appeared to be the usual nasty walls of the prison, but the second half looked to lead into some sort of cave.
"The older male who bid against your men."
Masters.
"Men," she repeated.
Only one is my apparent husband. The rest barely know me.
"Therefore, men." She followed up with, "Stop arguing about the obvious. You like Titus's mysterious vibes, Blaze’s calmness intrigues you, and Kai pisses you off, but you're intrigued by his personality. As for your husband, he's wrapped around your finger and isn't dumping you. Therefore, men. Back to the priority."
We turned left into a narrow tunnel, the walls becoming smaller until we had to shift to shuffling sideways to get to the other side.
We didn’t stop until we reached an opening with four paths.
"The man in question isn't fond of losing. Due to the negotiations not ending in his favor, it looks as though he has to work from the inside out. That last bit is my assumption for our current circumstances, but it was one of the worries your husband had when talking to Kai and Blaze."
Was this after a night of sex or something?
That would have been the only reason I could think of for me to not wake up during this apparent conversation.
"Indeed, and it was through a phone call," she revealed. "We need to go down here."
Why exactly?
"I'm following whatever holds more power than I."
Hold on. What?
My body was moving forward to the third tunnel to my right, and Freya didn't answer until we were deep enough that the little bulb lights that helped brighten the tunnels dimmed to darkness.
And I can't see.
We came to a stop and Freya whispered, "What is one important thing you've learned about yourself so far?"
I have OCD for cleanliness, I love cheesecake more than Tiramisu, and Kitty makes me wish I had a little sister?
Freya was completely silent, and I mentally groaned.
I was actually being honest.
"I'm well aware of that, Alisha. Now, what do I actually want to hear from you?"
My life is usually spared by following my instincts.
"Good." Her presence suddenly began to fade, which left me in a bundle of panic.
Wait. Freya. Don't leave yet!
"I've brought you far enough to face the challenge heading towards you. Do not question your power. Allow it to wrap around you like a cocoon, and when it does, one of higher power will protect you when you need it the most."
Her essence was but a twinkle when I caught onto the last bit of her voice.
"Claim what is already yours."
She faded from my mind, leaving me with the hollow emptiness. There was no grasp of Saphire's company either, leaving me no choice but to handle the next set of approaching events on my own.
Don't fail me now.
One thing I'd learned with my bits of training from Lyla was that panic didn't fix shit. To fight, you needed to be calm and have a sense of clarity with every move you made. If the time for thinking was limited, you followed your reflective responses and pictured yourself winning the battle at hand.
In this tunnel, the biggest weakness I'd have was my lack of sight, but the longer I thought about it, the calmer I became.
Dragons have heightened vision. My abilities are heightened to an annoying level. I can use that to my advantage. You are capable, Alisha. You are royalty and have been trained to tackle the toughest scenarios in your field. You won't be brought down by a man with deep pockets, and you won't fall until you achieve your revenge.
The self-talk was what pushed me forward, the sudden drive to make those who had hope in me proud while empowering and defending myself from my approaching attackers.
The once pitch-black tunnel began to brighten to a dim glow. I focused harder, feeling the tingling sensations that began their journey from my heart through my arms and legs.
My body wasn't shivering with cold like before. The heat of another magnitude coursed through my veins while my eyes wildly scanned around me. I could see past the walls of dirt and pipes - hidden wires of magic coursing beneath.
The intriguing discovery reminded me of the tour. They had mentioned the mines where prisoners on Level One normally spent strenuous hours here digging for nothing, only to end up with exhausted muscles and soreness.
There has to be a reason why Freya brought me here.
I decided to run forward, and it was good I did because ten solid steps later and there was an explosion.
The sudden blast rocked the ground, and I cursed when the hairs on my arms began to rise up.
Time to run for my life!
Racing forward, I swiftly turned right. The sound of a click followed by another explosion made me push harder as my mere run turned into a hard sprint. One bomb after another, the explosions kept going until the alarm sounded.
I skidded to a stop, noticing a hidden passage to my left while I heard shouts of 'THIS WAY' coming from my right.
Racing to the hidden space, I had to drop to the floor and crawl into the tiny space. When all it led to was a dead end, I didn't panic. Rotating myself so my back was pressed against the solid wall, I crossed my legs into a yoga pose and worked on slowing my breathing.
Concentrate, Alisha. Your enemy is merely grand in numbers alone. You are of monarchy. You are a supernatural with a higher purpose. You are marked, and if push comes to shove, your mate will locate you.
I stared at a hole far ahead. My breathing calmed down while I pushed away any fear that tried to plague me. I picked up the announcement that felt like it came from above me.
"Attention. Attention. We are conducting construction in the mines. There is no need to be alarmed. I repeat. Construction is happening within the mines. Guards, please ensure no one has access to the mines while the designated crews investigate the matter. Prisoners remain in their cells or underground cafeteria in the meantime. Any attempts of defiance will be punishable by death. I won't repeat this again!"
All that announcement did was prove my growing suspicions.
A setup.
Closing my eyes, I tensed up at the sudden shuffling of footsteps, but the sudden pull to a past memory triggered before I could stop it.
* * *
"Lyla. You are not trying to tell me that I should merely meditate in the middle of a train track and I'll be able to pinpoint these five silver balls you've distinctively hidden from me, just in time to keep that approaching train from obliterating me from this life."
All my rushed words did was make Lyla smirk while
she crossed her arms and carried on floating mid-air in her crossed leg position.
"That's exactly what I'm saying." She bobbed her head in pride. "I'm so glad you actually paid atte-"
"Lyla! Do you want me to die?! Are you still mad about us breaking up? I swear I'll give you another box of chocolates. No, I'll take you out to a movie or something. NO! We can have a threesome!" I was spitting out nonsense at this point for the sake of getting untied from the train tracks beneath me.
"I'd happily have a threesome with you and Atticus." She winked. "However, not for the sake of getting out of this lesson. As for being mad at us breaking up, I'm not. Remember, I'm the one who thought it was best."
"Which I still think is stupid," I countered. "I've known you were a guy for ages. Why does that suddenly change shit because you now know that I know?!"
She was quiet, flickers of shame reflecting in her blue orbs before the sound of the train horn reminded me of my predicament.
"Shit!" I cursed and looked at the train that was still far away. It was going at medium speed, but no matter what speed it was traveling at, I'd be nothing but mushed remains if I didn't figure this challenge out.
"Focus, Alisha. Unlock the second part of your psychic abilities and allow your mind to locate the items of question. Once you've pinpointed all five of the balls, your chains will unlock, and you'll be free to move out of the-."
Whatever else she was trying to explain was zoned out as I put all my focus on the task at hand. My surroundings, once pitch-black due to my closed eyes, suddenly lit up like neon lights, the flow of nature's energy and man-made creations distinctly colored.
I'd learned quickly that anything neon colored was of mother nature's creation, and man-created items, including metal, were dull colors with only bits of illumination.
The silver balls I would have to retrieve would be dull of color, however, I couldn't discount the chances of Lyla infusing them with magic to give off the impression they were of the earth's creation.
Psychic Prison Page 19
